[goodbyeeveryonepeacendblessings]

I can’t be the first one to tell y’all talkin like “heckin fluffo doggo” isn’t cute

[khe1]

I like saying swear words and being an all around devil

[eternalgf]

the new lesbian identifier is being able to correctly pronounce saoirse ronan’s name

[ughquaria]

we love the winner of as5 don’t we girls (x) 

[reb6669-deactivated20180925]

horny for affection

[raven]

if u liked mythology as a kid ur gay

[penalizer-deactivated20181210]

RB WITH YOUR OPINIONS ON: milk, mustard, mayonnaise, black licorice.

[lattelilac]

*Aphrodite talking abt me*: dumb bitch never fuckign sleeps or drinks water

[genderpeach]

Adderall

Stomach: We need to eat food I think

Brain: Nah I don't think so

Stomach: No seriously, I think we should eat food

Brain: Feels fine up here

Hands: We're all shaky, dude

Mouth: I could go for some water

Stomach: DUDE EAT SOMETHING

Brain: FINE

Salivary glands: zzzzz

Mouth: Ugh it doesn't even taste good

Brain: I still don't see why this is necessary

[ambientwitch]

hey any other gays have to position your legs at odd and slightly uncomfortable angles for no reason while sitting in a chair of any sort

[hokagee-deactivated20140711]

she wears short skirts i wear tshirts she wears high heels and i wear my naruto headband

[mcavoy]

everyday i think about how frank sinatra tried using his mafia ties to kill woody allen and i wanna know who the fuck stopped him.

[sebagrelle]

grocery store: *plays some funky 80s song*

my poor mother: please dont

me, immediately dancing in the middle of the aisle:

[realitytvshow]

New York Goes to Work - Ghost Hunter

[uncookedtrashmonster]

“lets ask if it’s a male or female with us.”

“MALE, FEMALE, WHAT?”

[nxrcal-deactivated20221223]

this is better than buzzfeed unsolved

[saiasus]

“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT”

[meloetta]

i’m so bitter i can’t let go of anything i’ll be having a perfectly normal conversation with someone then remember something hurtful they said 8 months ago and be like ‘well anyways i’m going to bed bye’ at 2pm

[highly-radioactive-nerd]

Listen, i’d absolutely fuck a consenting, self-aware monster, but I wouldn’t fuck every monster.

A werewolf, he comes to me and says “hey, you wanna go for a ride?” and I says “sure” because he’s hot.

But If Godzilla came to me and says that, no. Godzilla is a father figure. Not for fucking.

[terriamon]

itd be fucked up if our teeth were always flacid but got hard when we ate