sober isagi is analytical, friendly, level-headed. the kind of guy who smiles politely and explains his thought process like he’s giving a powerpoint presentation.
drunk isagi???
miserable.
not sad. not emotional.
miserable.
the second the alcohol hits his system he turns into the most serious, brooding man alive like he just discovered the meaninglessness of existence.
slumped in a chair. eyebrows furrowed. staring at the floor like it personally stole the last goal.
and the worst part is the slurring.
slursagi, but instead of insult slurs, it’s just speech slurs.
every word comes out slow and dramatic like he’s delivering the final monologue of a tragic movie.
“liiife… ‘s jus’ a bunch’a… variables, y’know… all… movin’ around n’ stuff… an’ none’a you… none’a you get the… the equa– equash– … the math thing… the equation…”
everyone around him is like what.
bachira is trying so hard not to laugh.
meanwhile you’re holding his drink away from him like the concerned girlfriend you are.
the wildest part though?
he becomes weirdly nice to kaiser.
normally they are one argument away from a soccer-themed homicide.
but drunk isagi will stare at kaiser for a long moment like he’s analyzing him.
then nod slowly.
“you know what… you’re actually… not that bad…”
kaiser nearly chokes on his drink. “excuse me?”
isagi pats his shoulder, all serious. “you’re… a worthy rival.”
then he leans closer. whispers dramatically. “but i will still devour you.”
you’re in the corner trying not to laugh because this man is acting like he’s giving villain speeches while barely staying upright.
the moment you try to get him to go home he becomes philosophical boyfriend mode. staring at you with glassy eyes.
“do you think… destiny brought us together…”
“yoichi, you just tripped over a chair.”
“the chair… was part of the journey.”
and then he falls asleep on the couch mid-sentence.
itoshi rin
sober rin is the human equivalent of a thundercloud.
quiet. intense. emotionally constipated.
the man barely smiles.
drunk rin???
a giggler.
i’m not exaggerating.
the first time it happens everyone in the room freezes because rin IS LAUGHING.
not a little chuckle.
a full-on giggle.
like someone just told him the funniest joke in the universe.
and the craziest part is he laughs at everything.
someone drops a cup.
rin loses it.
nagi says something mildly stupid.
rin is bent over and wheezing.
at one point he laughs so hard he has to grab your arm to steady himself.
you’re staring at him like you just witnessed a solar eclipse.
“rin… are you okay?”
he wipes a tear from his eye. still giggling.
“that was… so funny…!”
and in your head, you’re like nothing happened???
he also becomes absurdly affectionate.
sober rin would rather die than admit he likes being close to you in public.
drunk rin??? arm around your shoulders.
leaning on you.
resting his head on top of yours like you’re his emotional support human.
at some point he’s holding your face very seriously.
still smiling like a happy idiot.
“you’re really pretty.”
everyone nearby just witnessed the itoshi rin compliment.
history books will record this day.
and then five minutes later he’s giggling again because someone’s phone ringtone sounded funny.
itoshi sae
sae normally carries himself like the calmest, most composed man in existence.
borderline emotionally untouchable.
drunk sae though?
unbelievably cheerful.
like his brother when drunk, it’s terrifying.
he becomes the type of drunk person who wants to talk to everyone.
bartenders. strangers. the random guy standing outside.
suddenly he’s draping an arm around rin’s shoulders.
which already feels like a glitch in reality.
“rin, you’re such a cute wittle brother.”
“you’re literally drunk, nii-chan.”
sae smiles brightly. “i know.”
he’s also extremely giddy.
like he’s discovering the world for the first time.
pointing at random things.
“look at that light. it’s nice.”
“that’s a streetlamp.”
“yeah. it’s nice.”
he also starts giving people unexpected compliments.
sae will look someone dead in the eye and say something weirdly sincere.
“you work hard” or “you have good taste in music.”
people walk away confused and emotionally validated.
at one point he claps when someone successfully opens a bottle.
claps.
rin looks like he’s reconsidering his entire family tree.
but the funniest part is when sae gets competitive about random things.
suddenly he’s challenging people to pointless contests.
who can walk in a straight line. who can throw a bottle cap further.
and he celebrates victories like he just won the world cup.
“did you see that?”
yes, sae.
everyone saw you throw a bottle cap one meter.
nagi seishiro
sober nagi’s entire personality is “this is a hassle.”
slow movements.
sleepy voice.
permanently horizontal if given the chance.
drunk nagi though???
energy.
terrifying amounts of it.
the moment alcohol hits his system he turns into a golden retriever with a caffeine addiction.
suddenly he’s walking everywhere.
talking constantly.
asking questions.
“hey, hey, hey, did you know this place has darts?”
reo nearly faints.
“nagi… you hate moving.”
“yeah, but darts look fun.”
he starts dragging people around like he’s hosting a tour.
“look over here.”
“oh wait, they have a pool.”
“do you think i can bounce the inflatable ball like soccer?”
you’re just following him in confusion because this man normally considers breathing too much effort.
he also becomes weirdly competitive.
nagi will challenge literally anyone to random games.
darts. arcade machines. flipping bottle caps.
if he loses he pouts dramatically.
if he wins he celebrates like he just discovered fire.
“did you see that? i’m amazing.”
reo is filming everything because no one will believe this happened.
the funniest part though?
drunk nagi suddenly wants to talk about his feelings.
out of nowhere.
he’ll sit next to you, leaning close.
“you’re my favorite person.”
then he immediately gets distracted by something shiny across the room.
mikage reo
sober reo is composed, confident, and very aware that he is extremely rich.
he carries himself like someone who grew up surrounded by luxury.
drunk reo???
forgets he’s rich.
completely.
the concept of money leaves his brain.
suddenly he’s acting like the most enthusiastic broke college student.
“guys, we should split fries.”
everyone stares at him.
reo. the billionaire heir. wants to split fries.
nagi whispers to you: “he bought a private jet once.”
reo is also the type of drunk who becomes absurdly generous (he’s always been generous, but it’s more extreme now).
he’ll try to tip people with random things.
at one point he hands a bartender his watch.
you have to physically stop him.
“reo baby, that costs more than my car.”
“oh.”
he blinks.
“… really?”
he also becomes extremely excited about small things.
cheap snacks? incredible.
vending machines? magical.
“you can just press a button and it gives you food??”
yes, reo. that’s how vending machines work.
the moment nagi asks for something he immediately goes into caretaker mode.
“nagi, do you want water.”
“nagi, do you want snacks.”
“nagi, sit down, you look tired.”
nagi’s like “i’m literally sprinting around the bar.”
but the funniest part is when drunk reo remembers he's rich again for five seconds.
suddenly he stands up dramatically.
“wait.”
everyone pauses.
he points at the entire table.
“i’ll buy everything.”
the waiter nods.
five minutes later reo leans over to you and whispers: “do you think my card will work.”
you stare at him.
“… reo.”
bachira meguru
sober bachira is pure sunshine.
chaotic, playful, constantly smiling, bouncing around like a kid who just discovered sugar.
the type to poke people randomly and start games for no reason.
drunk bachira though???
debbie downer.
like… the most dramatic sad boy imaginable.
he sits in a corner, chin in his hand, staring into the distance like he’s watching his life fall apart in slow motion.
everyone keeps checking if he’s okay.
because the bachira they know would be starting karaoke or climbing furniture.
instead he sighs.
a long sigh.
“the world is so cruel…”
someone drops a fry.
bachira stares at it like it symbolizes the fragility of life.
“that fry… had potential…”
isagi’s like “… bachira dude, it’s just a fry.”
bachira nods solemnly. “just like us.”
he also becomes weirdly pessimistic about soccer.
normally he’s the most passionate person about it.
drunk bachira is slumped across the table whispering like he’s delivering tragic poetry.
“what if… the ball doesn’t want to be kicked…”
you’re trying so hard not to laugh.
because five minutes later he’s staring at you with watery eyes.
“do you think the monster inside me is tired…”
and you’re just patting his shoulder like, “no, baby boy, the monster just had three drinks.”
the saddest part though is when someone tries to hype him up.
nagi: “bachira, let’s play darts.”
bachira sighs. “… what’s the point.”
ten minutes later he’s asleep with his cheek on the table looking like the most tragic painting ever created.
so yeah… don’t give this man alcohol, please.
shidou ryusei
sober shidou is loud.
chaotic.
feral.
this man is yelling, laughing, fighting, flirting, and causing problems all at once.
drunk shidou though???
silent.
terrifyingly silent.
the moment alcohol hits him he just… stops talking.
he sits there quietly with his drink, staring at nothing.
everyone around him is deeply uncomfortable.
because this is the man who once screamed about exploding goals for twenty minutes straight.
rin keeps glancing over suspiciously.
“why is he quiet.”
nobody knows.
shidou isn’t even looking angry.
just… calm.
contemplative.
like he’s thinking about the meaning of the universe.
someone finally asks him if he’s okay.
he slowly nods.
takes another sip.
says nothing.
five minutes later someone cracks a joke.
shidou doesn’t laugh.
he just nods in approval.
the room feels like they’re being judged by a very dangerous monk.
the funniest moment is when someone tries to start a chaotic drinking game.
normally shidou would be the FIRST person screaming about it.
instead he gently pushes the drink away.
“… i’ll watch.”
“BRO WHO ARE YOU.”
and then at the end of the night he quietly helps stack chairs.
rin can’t stop staring like he just witnessed a supernatural event.
karasu tabito
sober karasu is a professional menace.
sarcastic, teasing, always running his mouth.
the type who points out everyone’s weaknesses just to mess with them.
drunk karasu though?
shy. painfully shy.
like someone replaced his personality with a nervous college freshman.
the first sign is when someone makes a joke about him.
normally he’d fire back immediately.
drunk karasu just rubs the back of his neck.
“hey now…”
smiling awkwardly.
everyone pauses.
because karasu not roasting someone back is a historical anomaly.
he also starts apologizing for things that are not his fault.
someone bumps into him.
karasu bows slightly. “my bad.”
they literally ran into him.
he becomes super polite, too.
calling everyone by their full names.
“itoshi rin, would you like this seat?”
rin slowly turns toward him. “… what.”
karasu also gets embarrassed easily.
if you compliment him he immediately looks away.
ears a little red.
“yeah, yeah… quit it…”
the man who normally flirts like a menace is suddenly incapable of eye contact.
and if someone tries to start an argument with him?
he backs down immediately.
“nah nah, you got it.”
everyone is staring because this man normally thrives on conflict.
drunk karasu just wants peace.
kaiser michael
sober kaiser is the embodiment of arrogance.
dramatic, cocky, constantly talking about how superior he is.
the type who smiles like he already knows he’s better than everyone in the room.
drunk kaiser though???
humble.
and it’s honestly shocking.
suddenly he’s the nicest man alive.
he thanks waiters.
compliments strangers.
holds doors open.
the first time someone bumps into him and apologizes, kaiser smiles warmly.
“no, that was my fault.”
ness nearly collapses.
because michael kaiser just took blame for something.
he also starts complimenting people very sincerely.
he’ll look at isagi and nod thoughtfully.
“you’re a very impressive striker.”
isagi freezes. “... the fuck.”
kaiser shrugs. “it’s true.”
he also becomes weirdly reflective. staring at his drink quietly.
“i should be kinder more often.”
you’re sitting there like who replaced this man.
the funniest moment is when someone tries to provoke him.
sae mutters something insulting.
normally that would start a full rivalry speech.
drunk kaiser just smiles gently.
“you’re passionate. i respect that.”
sae looks personally offended by the lack of conflict and drama.
and the entire time ness is staring at him with wide, horrified eyes.
ness alexis
sober ness is intense.
loyal to kaiser to an almost scary degree.
emotional, but usually trying to keep it contained.
drunk ness though???
absolute madness.
there is no better word.
the moment alcohol hits his system he becomes the most chaotic person in the building.
laughing loudly.
talking too fast.
waving his arms everywhere.
he also becomes violently protective of kaiser.
like guard-dog mode (if you thought it was bad before, it’s worse now).
someone glances at kaiser? ness notices.
someone compliments kaiser? ness is already suspicious.
and if someone hits on kaiser… IT’S OVER.
this poor stranger walks up like “hey, you’re really handsome–”
ness LUNGES.
you and isagi have to grab him by the shoulders.
“NESS.”
he’s pointing dramatically.
“BACK OFF!!! HE BELONGS TO DESTINY.”
the stranger is backing away slowly.
meanwhile kaiser is standing there politely apologizing because drunk-humble kaiser is horrified.
ness is also incredibly emotional.
he will cry over nothing.
someone hands kaiser a napkin? ness sniffles.
“they respect you…”
at one point he grabs your hands very intensely.
“do you understand how amazing he is.”
“yes, ness.”
“no you don’t.”
he’s crying again.
the entire night becomes ness containment duty while he alternates between screaming praise for kaiser and trying to fight anyone who looks at him for longer than two seconds.
by the end of the night he’s draped over kaiser’s shoulder whispering dramatically: “i will protect you forever…”
kaiser gently pats his head like he’s calming a feral cat who doesn’t play about its owner.
ft. isagi yoichi, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, bachira meguru, shidou ryusei, karasu tabito, kaiser michael, ness alexis, chigiri hyoma, yukimiya kenyu, otoya eita, kunigami rensuke, aiku oliver, and hiori yo
isagi yoichi
he always jogs across the street instead of walking. like he could just stroll like a normal human being, but no – he has to do that half-jog, half-speedwalk thing with his backpack bouncing on his shoulder. every time he does it you’re like: oh wow. i’m in love with an excitable golden retriever.
he pushes his hair back with his palm when he’s concentrating, and it always falls back down immediately. he gets so frustrated with it, muttering under his breath. you’re sitting there watching him struggle like “yes. fight your bangs. battle them. i love you.”
he sits with his legs spread like he owns the couch, then automatically pulls you between them so your back is against his chest. he doesn’t even think about it, it’s muscle memory at this point.
when he laughs too hard, he bends forward with his hands on his knees like a boy in PE class. it sends you into cardiac arrest every time.
he gets excited telling you about soccer and starts using his hands to mime plays in the air, accidentally hitting you at least once per demonstration. “oh– sorry babe, wait look at this angle though–”
he’s always warm. ALWAYS. you touch him and it’s like hugging a fresh laundry pile. he has the audacity to be confused when you cling to him. “you feel nice” you admit, and he gets red in the ears for the rest of the day.
itoshi rin
he leans on walls. constantly. he can’t just stand normally like a person. he crosses his arms, ankle over ankle, leaning back like he’s posing for a magazine cover. the worst part is he’s not doing it on purpose – that’s just how he exists.
he always looks down slightly when talking to you, that intense eye contact while he tilts his head just a little. it makes your brain short-circuit every time.
he has a habit of scoffing and looking away when he’s flustered. the most boyish, tsundere little “tch.” you live for it.
he types aggressively. full anger. thumbs of steel. you hear every single tap. you ask him what’s wrong and he goes “nothing.” which is rin language for “i’m thinking about how much i like you and i’m malfunctioning.”
when he’s listening to you talk, he bends down slightly so he can hear you better. he doesn’t say anything about it, but his eyebrows soften just the tiniest bit. you could combust.
he wears black and white, but somehow still looks like the hottest man alive every single day. his boyish version of affection is giving you his jacket without announcing it, just silently placing it on your shoulders and walking away like it’s nothing.
itoshi sae
he pretends not to care about anything, but gets lowkey competitive in the cutest ways. you say something like “i bet you can’t make that shot blindfolded” and suddenly he’s actually doing it.
he always drives with one hand on the wheel and the other resting on your thigh. doesn’t even look at you when he does it. just casually ends your life.
his voice gets soft when he talks to you. everyone else gets the monotone “i’m bored of everything” tone. you? he lowers his voice a little, leans in slightly, speaks slower. you hate how much you love it.
he rolls up his sleeves when he’s focused or irritated. you might actually pass out watching him do it.
he has this habit of reaching out to fix something on you (hair, collar, necklace) without comment. just a quick touch, head tilted slightly, then back to whatever he was doing. meanwhile you’re dying internally.
when he laughs, like a real laugh, he puts a hand over his face for a second as if he’s embarrassed that he finds something funny. that little flash of boyish vulnerability is your roman empire.
nagi seishiro
he drapes himself over you like he’s a big sleepy cat. if you’re sitting, he’s lying down with his head in your lap. if you’re lying down, he’s laying half on top of you. no in-between.
he gives you that little lazy grin when he sees you – the one where only one side of his mouth lifts. you swear you feel your heart physically flip every time.
when he wants your attention, he pokes your cheek with one finger. just boop. “hey. look at me.” you always fold.
he lifts his shirt slightly to scratch his stomach, exposing his abs for absolutely no reason. you stare. he notices. he smirks. “like what you see?” menace.
he always carries things for you without saying anything – bags, jackets, whatever. he’ll just take them out of your hands, sling them over his shoulder, and yawn.
when he’s playing games, he sits with his hoodie half-on, hair messy, eyes focused, then looks over at you and gives you a sleepy “come here.” instant obedience. instant love.
mikage reo
he talks with his whole body. full hand gestures, leaning in, shoulders moving – it’s so energetic and boyish you could bottle it as perfume.
he gets sooo dramatic when he’s excited. like “babe LOOK at this, it’s so cool– wait i have to show you– no no sit down you need to see this!” and you’re like yes… yes king… show me your lego set.
he buys you drinks and snacks then insists he doesn’t want any… and then steals half of yours. you don’t even fight him anymore.
he jogs up stairs two at a time, entirely too fast for a normal human. every time you struggle behind him he looks back like “oh– sorry!! want me to carry you?” he’s serious.
he give the warmest, tightest hugs. full lift-you-off-the-ground energy. he buries his face into your neck for a second and mumbles “missed you.” you ascend.
he’s so boyishly proud when he shows you something he’s good at. he lights up, eyes shining, waiting for your praise. and when you give it? he melts on the spot. absolutely ruined for you.
bachira meguru
he greets you like a puppy who hasn’t seen his owner in five years. full sprint. arms wide. borderline tackle hug. you always squeal, he always laughs, and everyone else watches like “ah. there he goes again.”
he links pinkies with you constantly. not even hands – pinkies. swinging them back and forth while humming. boy-coded affection at its cutest.
when he’s happy, he literally bounces. like he’s physically incapable of staying still. knee bouncing, shoulders shaking, whole body vibrating like he’s got too much joy for one human vessel.
he lifts you randomly. not even romantically, but in the most boyish “look babe ur small lol” way possible. you’ll be standing there and suddenly your feet are off the ground.
“meguru– PUT ME DOWN.”
“but you’re fun-sized!”
he sticks his tongue out when he concentrates, especially when he’s drawing or lacing his shoes. you stare every time. he notices. he smirks. “like what you see?”
he gives you his hoodies and ties the strings tight around your face like a menace. stands back. admires his work. “cute.” you want to be mad, but you can’t because he looks at you like you hung the moon.
shidou ryusei
he kicks pebbles when he walks. literally like a middle school boy who got bored during recess. wildly boy-coded behavior. you make fun of him. he kicks a bigger pebble to prove a point.
he leans forward when talking to you, dangerously close, with that stupid smirk. he knows exactly what he’s doing. menace behavior at 200%.
he takes your hand, but holds it in the messiest way possible – fingers tangled, sometimes half-slipping, sometimes swinging your arms dramatically. he’s not doing it right, but at least he’s enthusiastic.
he watches you from the corner of his eye like a delinquent trying not to look soft. except the second you catch him, he grins like: “caught me. what now, pretty girl?”
he absolutely flexes when he stretches, does it on purpose, then pretends it was an accident. “oh? was i distracting? my bad.” you’re going to jail because the way he rolls his shoulders should be illegal.
he lifts his shirt to wipe sweat off his face, exposing everything. he knows you see. he wants you to see. he lives to see you lose composure for him.
but then he does inexplicably boyish soft things like buying you your favorite candy and tossing it at you like “caught it, princess?” like he didn’t walk two blocks out of his way just to get it.
karasu tabito
he sits backwards on chairs. every. single. time. you don’t think you’ve ever seen him sit normally. he flips the chair around, rests his arms on the back, and leans forward like he’s about to interrogate you.
he raises one eyebrow when you talk and it sends shockwaves through your entire nervous system. he doesn’t even know it’s attractive. he just does it naturally.
he has cool, calm energy, but when something surprises him, he does that boyish little “huh?” with wide eyes. it’s so funny and cute you want to bite him.
he walks behind you with his hands in his pockets, head slightly tilted, following like a quiet little shadow. but the moment someone else tries talking to you, he’s suddenly at your side like “mm?”
he has a habit of tapping your chin with his knuckles when he wants your attention. not a kiss. not a touch. just a tiny, devastating tap. “look at me.” lord help you.
he loves making you laugh and pretends he’s not dying inside every time he succeeds. but the boyish part is how he looks away with the smuggest grin, like he just won the world cup.
kaiser michael
he pushes his hair back CONSTANTLY. special boy behavior. his ego and his layers have a mutual agreement to fight daily.
he leans over you when he talks, arm braced above your shoulder, stupidly close. he’s not even flirting. he just likes towering over you in a boyish “look at me, i’m your whole world” way.
he cracks his knuckles when he’s annoyed. then cracks his neck. then rolls his shoulders. it’s the most boyish “i’m irritated, but pretending i’m not” routine you’ve ever witnessed.
he tilts your chin up with one finger when he wants your attention. you hate how effective it is. you hate even more that he knows it’s effective.
he tries to act composed but gets boyishly jealous SO fast. someone compliments you? he immediately stands closer, hand on your waist, smirking like “yeah she’s mine.” his pride cannot handle competition.
when he laughs for real, he bends forward and rests his hands on his knees like some high school jock. you swear that alone is more rizz than half his intentional flirting.
he buys you things but gives them to you like it’s no big deal. “oh. yeah. saw this and thought of you.” he’s boyishly casual about it, but if you thank him too softly he short circuits.
ness alexis
he gets flustered SO easily. not in a shy way, more like in a “no no no that’s not what i meant– wait stop looking at me like that” way. extremely boyish meltdown energy.
he trips over absolutely nothing and pretends he didn’t. he will gaslight you into believing he meant to stumble.
he does that thing where he bites his lower lip when he’s thinking. not sexy on purpose. just boyish concentration. but it is sexy. painfully so.
he adjusts his blue lens glasses by pushing them up with one finger, then looks at you with the gentlest eyes. you fall in love a little more every time.
he walks you to places even when it’s out of his way. he won’t admit why. “i just… happened to be going this direction.” no he didn’t. liar.
he gets dramatic when he’s embarrassed, literally hiding his face behind his hands or his sleeve while whining “stoppp.” the boy has no emotional armor around you.
he shoulders open doors for you like a knight, then gets flustered when you thank him. “i-it was nothing.” sir you acted like you were saving me from a burning castle.
chigiri hyoma
he runs his fingers through his hair when he’s flustered, which only makes him look hotter. he’ll be mid-sentence, something you say catches him off guard, and he does that slow pushback of his hair, eyes flicking away for a second. it’s boyish, subtle… and criminally attractive.
he leans forward when he’s annoyed, hands on his knees, hair falling around his face. he looks like he’s about to deliver a dramatic monologue, but it’s really just him trying to calm down.
chigiri always waits for you by leaning against something – lockers, walls, railings – with his arms crossed and one foot against the surface. one flick of his eyes toward you and your entire soul leaves your body.
he gets embarrassed when you compliment him and tries to hide it with a scoff, but you can see the tips of his ears turn pink. he hates how obvious it is and loves that you notice.
his boyish affection shows when he walks slightly ahead of you, then slows down just enough for you to fall in step beside him. he’ll brush your hand with his, pretending it was an accident, then keep doing it until you hold his hand.
when he laughs really hard, he puts a hand over his stomach and leans into you like he can’t hold himself upright. the genuine, unrestrained boyish laughter? you’re obsessed.
yukimiya kenyu
he fixes his hair in any reflective surface. windows, mirrors, phone screens, car doors… if he can see himself, he’s brushing his hair back. you find it ridiculously adorable.
he tries to look composed around you, but does that boyish thing where he clears his throat three times before speaking because he’s nervous.
he uses both hands when holding your face – gentle, but with the slightest tremble of excitement. he tries to hide it, but that little shake gives away how much you affect him.
he gets so flustered when you tease him that he literally covers his mouth with his hand like a shocked anime boy.
yukimiya walks with purpose, but his pace always slows down when he notices you falling behind, and he casually extends an arm for you to loop through. he pretends it’s manners, but it’s actually him being boyishly clingy.
he has the most heartbreaking boyish habit of staring at you with stars in his eyes when he thinks you’re not looking. his teammates bully him for it relentlessly. he denies it… poorly.
otoya eita
he always jumps the last step of any staircase. doesn’t matter how many stairs there are. big or small. he hops off that last one like a hyper middle school boy and lands with a stupid smug grin.
he slings his arm over your shoulders casually every time you’re within reach. even if he’s not flirting, he just loves the boyish closeness.
when he’s teasing you, he leans in way too close, bends down to be at your eye level, and smirks like he’s the main character in a cheesy romcom. you hate how well it works on you.
otoya whistles when he’s impressed. literally just a low “oooh” whistle when you do something cool, funny, or cute. he doesn’t even realize it’s boyish, it’s just instinct.
he does that thing where he jogs a few steps backwards while talking to you because he doesn’t want the conversation to end yet.
he always tries to act slick, but when you genuinely compliment him, he gets boyishly shy and looks away with a hand rubbing the back of his neck. FULL character break.
kunigami rensuke (pre-WC)
he does pushups with one hand behind his back like a show-off, but the second you compliment his strength? he turns red and mumbles “it’s nothing…”
kunigami holds things for you without being asked – bags, jackets, cups – and he stands there holding everything like your personal pack mule with zero complaints. he kinda loves it.
when he’s tired, he stretches with his arms over his head, shirt lifting just enough for you to see his abs. the moment he realizes you’re staring, he flushes and lowers his arms like he’s been caught doing something illegal.
kunigami always steps in front of you when crossing a crowded street, hand reaching back behind him instinctively. he doesn’t even think about it; it’s pure boyish protectiveness.
he gives awkward thumbs-ups when he’s proud of you. endearing. adorable. embarrassingly boy-coded.
whenever he laughs really hard, he throws his head back and claps once like he just witnessed the funniest thing on earth. you live for it.
aiku oliver
he stretches his arms behind his head when he sees you approaching, chest out, smug grin. yes he’s posing. yes he wants you to look. yes it works.
he has the habit of calling out to you across a room with a whistle or a “hey, sweetheart” that makes everyone turn, but he only looks at you. boyish confidence + danger.
oliver bends down to your height when he teases you, hands on his knees like he’s talking to a child just to annoy you. you slap his shoulder every time and he LOVES IT.
he ruffles your hair then immediately fixes it for you, brushing the strands back behind your ears with surprising gentleness. you want to scream.
he always stands slightly behind you with one hand resting casually on your back, guiding you like it’s natural. he doesn’t even realize how boyfriend-coded it is.
that boyish grin he gives you when he’s proud of himself? the one with half-lidded eyes and his tongue teasing the corner of his mouth? you’re done for.
hiori yo
when he’s thinking, he twirls the ends of his hair absentmindedly. he does it most often when he’s talking to you, which means he’s lowkey nervous, but trying not to show it.
he sits with his knees pulled up sometimes, resting his chin on them while he listens to you talk. it’s the most boyish, gentle thing ever.
hiori walks close to you, not touching, but just close enough that your arms brush occasionally. he looks down every time it happens, cheeks pink.
he does that thing where he covers his mouth when he laughs, shoulders shaking a little. but if you make him laugh really hard, he snorts one time and then dies inside from embarrassment.
when he hands you something (a drink, a phone, a note), he holds it out with both hands like a polite little boy. and you adore him for it.
like, that was the plan. laptop open, notes half-written, pen tucked behind his ear in a way that makes him look way too put together for someone currently spiraling over tactics five minutes ago.
instead, he’s staring at his phone. smiling.
not his usual small, satisfied smile either – no, this one is soft and bright and so full it almost looks like it hurts. his eyes are warm, his shoulders relaxed, and his dimples – god, his dimples – are so deep they might as well be permanent.
you don’t even realize you’ve stopped breathing a little.
“yoichi…?”
he hums, absentminded, not even looking up.
you inch closer, peeking over his shoulder. a tiny puppy trips over its own paws on his screen.
you blink. “you’re smiling like that over this?”
he finally glances at you, sheepish, but still glowing. “it’s cute.”
you don’t answer.
because you’re not looking at the phone anymore.
you’re looking at him.
the way his lashes lower when he rewatches the clip. the quiet little laugh under his breath. the way he leans into the moment like it’s something fragile and worth holding onto. it makes your chest ache in the softest way.
“why are you staring at me like that?”
his voice pulls you back, and suddenly he’s looking at you instead, smile faltering just a little, replaced by something nervous.
you don’t look away. “because you’re cute.”
he freezes completely.
“... the puppy?” he tries.
you shake your head, smiling softer. “you.”
and just like that, he’s gone – face flushing, hand coming up to rub the back of his neck, smile breaking through again like he can’t stop it.
“you can’t just say that,” he mumbles.
you lean a little closer, resting your head against his shoulder like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
“i just did.”
he lets out a quiet laugh, still flustered, still smiling so hard it shows.
even when the video ends, he doesn’t look back at his phone.
a/n: quick drabble post! i had this in my drafts and decided to just post it 😭
also i watched the movie obsession by curry barker yesterday and that was ABSOLUTE CINEMA. one of the BEST movies i have ever watched and i was so delighted to see moist critical (charlie) had the same positive takes on the movie!!!
but you know what else is absolute cinema? sakamoto days. the urge to write for gaku and nagumo is so strong rn…
synopsis: blocking their kiss with your hand/an object.
isagi genuinely believes you're just joking at first.
because the two of you are sitting together after practice, he's leaning in all soft and smiley, and then suddenly? your palm lands directly over his mouth.
the poor man doesn’t move. his eyes go wide.
"... seriously?"
and you're trying so hard not to laugh because he looks genuinely offended.
"yoichi, personal space."
"we've literally kissed before."
"not today."
he stares at you for a few seconds like he's trying to solve a puzzle. like he's reading the field. calculating. adapting. evolving.
then suddenly he grabs your wrist and moves your hand aside.
you think you've won because you've already prepared your other hand.
except this man is a soccer player. his reaction speed is ridiculous.
before hand #2 can deploy, he catches that one, too.
now you're sitting there with both wrists trapped in his hands.
"yoichi."
"..."
"yoichi."
"you used both your defenders."
and then he kisses you anyway.
afterwards, he's grinning into your face like he just scored the winning goal in a world cup final.
"metavision comes in handy outside of the field, too."
"i hate you."
"no, you love me."
itoshi rin
rin does not find this funny. at all.
you put your hand over his mouth the moment he leans in.
the air temperature drops fifteen degrees.
he slowly blinks. then looks at your hand. then at you. then back at your hand.
"move."
"no."
rin looks like he's considering ending civilization. because why are you playing games right now?
when you refuse again, he simply grabs your wrist and pulls it away.
you immediately replace it with a pillow. now he's staring at the pillow.
you can practically hear his internal monologue: are you serious.
"it's my emotional support pillow."
"i don't care."
"it says it does."
"you're not funny."
he says this while actively fighting a smile. and that's how you know he's losing.
eventually, he just grabs your jaw and turns your face toward him before kissing your cheek instead.
which catches you completely off guard. you lower the pillow immediately. mistake.
because the second your guard drops, he finally kisses you properly.
afterward he looks annoyingly smug. like he wasn't just battling a throw pillow five seconds ago.
"idiot."
"you got outplayed by a cushion."
"and yet i still won. so i don’t wanna hear it.”
itoshi sae
sae's reaction is somehow worse. because he doesn't react. at all.
you put your hand over his mouth.
sae just stares. the expression remains completely unchanged.
"..."
"..."
you start laughing first. because why is he looking at you like you're a mildly inconvenient… idk, traffic cone?
"done?" he asks.
"no."
so then you upgrade. you grab your phone and hold it between your faces.
sae actually sighs. like he's a tired father of six. then he casually takes the phone from your hand. locks it. puts it on the table. and returns.
you grab a water bottle. he takes that, too.
you grab a stuffed animal. gone.
another object. gone.
another. gone.
at some point, it stops being about the kiss and becomes a competition. you are rapidly running out of household items. sae is rapidly running out of patience.
finally, he catches both your hands before you can reach for anything else.
"finished?"
"maybe..."
"good."
then he tilts your chin up and kisses you. slow. completely unbothered. like this was always how things were going to end.
afterward, he just goes back to whatever he was doing.
meanwhile, you're sitting there offended.
because why did it feel like he won a battle you didn't even realize you were losing?
nagi seishiro
nagi almost falls asleep during the process.
you cover his mouth with your hand. he blinks.
"... why."
"because."
"that's not a reason…?”
he genuinely sounds exhausted. like you've just assigned him homework.
when he tries again, you shove a plushie between your faces.
nagi stares at it. then pokes it. then pokes it again.
"this bear hates me."
"it does."
"what did i do."
"exist."
he sighs dramatically. which is funny because he's the one doing all the work here.
you keep replacing every attempt with a new obstacle. pillow. another plushie. book. blanket. at one point, you hold up an entire bag of chips.
nagi is so tired. so incredibly tired.
finally, he just flops forward. not for the kiss. just directly onto you. full body weight.
"sei! moveee."
"nuh uh."
"you're crushing me."
"remove obstacle."
"never."
so he stays there. annoyingly patient. until eventually your arms get tired.
the second you lower them, this little menace immediately lifts his head and steals a kiss.
then drops back onto you again.
mission accomplished. back to sleep.
mikage reo
reo takes this as a personal challenge.
the second your hand blocks his kiss, his eyes light up. that's the look. the competitive look.
"okay."
"okay?"
"okay."
you already know this is about to become a problem.
you block him with your hand. he dodges.
you use a pillow. he goes around it.
you use a blanket. he pulls it down.
you use a book. he kisses the book.
"reo."
"i'm committed now."
it gets worse. you grab random objects from around the room. reo is somehow treating this like an obstacle course. every successful dodge makes him more determined. every failed attempt makes him laugh harder.
eventually, you're laughing too much to keep defending yourself properly. which is exactly what he was waiting for. because reo's actual strategy was never getting around the objects. it was making you laugh.
he waits until you're doubled over giggling. then gently takes your face in both hands.
"you done?"
"unfortunately."
"good."
kiss. successful. victory.
and this man absolutely celebrates.
"YESSSS!!!!"
"reo."
"I WON!!!"
"this wasn't a competition."
"it sure as hell became one!"
and somehow he's already texting nagi about it.
bachira meguru
bachira thinks this is the funniest thing you've ever done.
the moment your hand lands over his mouth, he starts laughing. which is a problem. because now he's laughing directly into your palm.
"ew, megs, i can feel your gums."
"you started it."
he keeps trying to lean forward while you're actively pushing his face away. it's like trying to stop a golden retriever from greeting someone. he keeps coming back.
you block him with a pillow. he peeks around one side.
you move the pillow. he peeks around the other.
you move again. he switches directions.
the two of you end up spinning around the couch.
eventually, he just grabs the pillow.
"okay, but what if i kiss the pillow?"
"that's… weird."
"what if the pillow is you?"
"that's… still weird."
"what if you're the weird one?"
"meguru."
"yeah?"
he's already smiling because he knows you're losing composure.
that's his entire strategy. make you laugh until you forget what you're doing.
and it works. because the second you start giggling, your grip loosens.
bachira immediately swoops in. victory secured. his lips on yours.
then this menace has the audacity to grin.
"monster said that was cheating."
"your monster is unemployed 👎"
shidou ryusei
this goes horribly.
come on, it’s shidou. a man who treats resistance like a challenge from the universe itself.
your hand blocks his mouth. he pauses. his eyes widen. and then–
"oh, so you wanna play that game, baby?"
fahhh.
the problem with shidou is that he genuinely enjoys chaos. you blocking him doesn't discourage him. it actively motivates him.
you put a pillow between your faces. he gasps loudly.
"ANOTHER OPPONENT."
"it's a pillow."
"NOT FOR LONG."
you are laughing so hard you're crying because he's fully beefing with an inanimate object.
he starts negotiating. with the pillow.
"move and nobody gets hurt."
"ryu."
"it knows what it did."
eventually, you grab multiple cushions. a fortress. a wall. a defensive line.
shidou looks absolutely delighted.
"finally. a worthy opponent."
5 seconds later, he launches himself over the couch. you scream. he screams. the couch nearly dies.
and somehow, amid the disaster, he still manages to steal a kiss. then he's pumping his fist like he just won an olympic event.
"LET'S GOOOOO."
"we almost broke the couch!!!"
"WORTH IT."
karasu tabito
karasu catches on to your game immediately.
the second your hand blocks his mouth, he starts laughing. that low, annoying laugh. the one that means he's about to be insufferable.
"ya think yer clever, huh?"
"i know i am."
"that's dangerous, darlin’."
karasu doesn't actually rush. that's the scary part. he's patient. he leans back. crosses his arms. and waits.
now you're suspicious. because why is he so calm? why does he look like he's already won?
"tabi."
"hm?"
"what are you planning?"
"nothing."
liar.
you keep the pillow between you anyway. just in case.
then he starts talking. normal conversation. completely unrelated topics. asking about your day. telling stories. making jokes.
and after 10 minutes, you accidentally lower your guard because you've forgotten the entire mission.
immediately he reaches over and tilts your chin up.
"got distracted, huh?"
"YOU SET ME UP."
"that's called strategy."
and he kisses you. plan successful. karasu looks entirely too pleased with himself.
"you planned that from the beginning."
"of course i did."
"you spent ten minutes setting up a whole conversation for ONE kiss?"
karasu shrugs. "got the kiss, didn't i?"
kaiser michael
kaiser takes this personally in every sense of the word. deeply. spiritually. emotionally.
you block his kiss with your hand.
he pauses because he is actually so offended, shocked, and betrayed right now. like you've just informed him his reflection called him ugly.
"what."
"access denied."
"you denied me?"
"yes."
"me??”
he points at himself. since apparently this is the greatest tragedy humanity has ever witnessed.
you use a book next. kaiser narrows his eyes. at the book.
"whose side are you on?"
"it's a book."
"answer the question."
he is genuinely arguing with paper.
eventually, he starts trying to charm his way through. compliments. dramatic speeches. fake heartbreak. everything. none of it works.
until he suddenly goes quiet. which is very suspicious.
you lower the book slightly. mistake. huge mistake.
because kaiser immediately takes advantage of the opening.
the second it's lowered – mwah! done. finished. game over.
he looks unbearably pleased afterward.
"awww, you hesitated."
"you're annoying."
"and yet."
"..."
"and yet."
ness alexis
ness genuinely thinks you've stopped loving him for approximately 6 seconds.
the moment your hand blocks his kiss, he malfunctions.
"... oh."
"ness."
"... oh."
"ness."
he looks so devastated that you immediately feel guilty. why does he have to look like a kicked puppy when he’s sad?
"it's a joke."
"are you sure?"
"yes."
"completely sure?"
"ness."
"okay."
he recovers. sort of.
but now he's suspicious. because every time he leans in, another object appears. pillow. book. water bottle. blanket. he's staring at each new obstacle like it's personally victimizing him.
"what did i do to deserve this?”
"nothing."
"then why am i suffering?”
drama king.
eventually, he too starts trying to negotiate.
"one kiss."
"no."
"half a kiss."
"that's not a thing."
"one third kiss."
"ness."
"i'm trying to compromise."
you laugh. and the second you laugh, his face immediately brightens. because that's what he's been waiting for. your attention. your smile. the fact you're having fun.
he reaches over and gently moves your hand away. much softer than everyone else. almost cautious. like he's still making sure you're okay with it.
then finally kisses you.
and the relief afterward is ridiculous. this man smiles like somebody returned the sun to the sky.
honestly, the biggest obstacle wasn't your hand. it was his own overthinking.
starring — otoya eita, sae itoshi, shidou ryusei, bunny iglesias
content + warnings — pranking your bf by sending him a "she's busy right now text" — smau. fem!reader. ot*ya is in it. mentions of cuckholding in saes part (as a joke tho😭).
an — this was requested!
titsay
stormborns
gummygunk
