Pairing: Weiler de Riva x Emmrich Volkarin
Words: 2,512
Rating: Mature
Summary: Weiler and Emmrich explore what it means to lose control.
AO3 Link
Thank you so much to @smoreofbabylon for the prompt a kiss to lose control. This . . . totally ran away from me and life got in the way. It probably isn't what you had in mind, but ironically I had no control over this. It just happened. It's true to Weiler and Emmrich though, so I hope you (and everyone else!) enjoys x
When Emmrich's hand reached forward toward her cheek - slow and hesitant, as if she were a skittish beast - Weiler instantly snatched his wrist in her own tight grip. Idiot, she scolded herself, you've just proved him right. A deep, shuddering breath fell from her lips as she stared down his hand like it posed a challenge, a threat. No, this is Emmrich, she had to remember. He has never hurt you, would never hurt you. Not like you're hurting him. With a sickening swoop in her belly, she realised that her trembling knuckles had bled of their colour. Her nails were digging into the tender skin, pressing against the thin blue ribbon of vein beneath. And yet - despite the frantic racing of her heart that seemed to stumble and trip in her chest - she could not force herself to let go.
"Sorry." She dropped her head, feeling her hand shake, and fixed her wide-eyed gaze at his shoes. The leather gleamed. The laces were perfectly symmetrical. The ends were pointed in a way that made her wonder if they had narrowed the width of his toes. Beneath her palm, a chilled dampness began to prickle. Emmrich had probably spent more coin on these shoes than she had owned in her life.
"Weiler." She flinched to hear his voice, no matter how gently it fell against her. Curling in on herself, she tucked her chin tighter to her collarbone, her eyes screwed tight as she waited for steel to harden his words. "Dearest one, may I?" Opening her left eye the slightest amount, she struggled to focus on his right hand, held out low toward her but with plenty of space between them still. She heard the question and was surprised by his intent when his left hand was still in her unforgiving grasp. Her vision began to clear; his palm was upward facing, the long fingers uncurled and relaxed within the burgundy leather.
She twitched, an uncomfortable jerk of her head one, two in time with her spiralling thoughts, but when he made to pull away her stomach lurched again.
"Wait." Close your eyes. Take a breath. Slow. Deep. Again. In. Out. Again. In . . . out. The long exhale was steadier, only a faint ripple to the air as it escaped her lips. "Okay. Where?"
"If you are comfortable with me doing so, your mandible. On your left-hand side."
Not quite trusting herself to let more words out, Weiler instead hummed. The vibration tickled up the length of her throat and along her tongue like her own voice would happily betray her to pour itself out to her lover. What it would say she was afraid to know, so a thoughtless noise would have to do. Like an animal.
“Darling, I know it’s difficult,” did he? How could he? When he could conjure a tapestry of words out of nothing like, well, magic when she could barely thread a needle with her clumsy tongue, how could he possibly know, “and in another circumstance I would not push this. But I need to hear you give me permission to touch you.”
Weiler swallowed, a thick and painful thing to do given the tension in her neck, and worked her jaw as a horse would champ around the bit that pinched its mouth. Her hand still gripped Emmrich’s wrist – Maker, shit, just let him go! – her arm now shaking with the effort, and of course he was going to grow impatient, pull away, sigh in such disappointment that yet again she had failed in such a simple thing like the imbecile she was when he had been so kind, so understanding, so enduring of her fucking weakness. His brow would furrow, his gaze would grow cold, and he would wrench himself from her (and of course she would be able to let him go then, how could she force him to stay?) and leave her alone, alone, alone like she deserved –