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@glitter-and-weights-blog
I have decided that I need a new start and instead of just deleting all the posts and starting new, Im going to make a new tumblr. This blog and my main will stay put but I wont be posting on them. Im doing this for my mental health (and I dont it attached to my main email anymore). I also wont be posting the link publicly, but if you want it, I will send it to you :) I just wanted to give people a heads up.
Im still hereā¦maybe. Idk. I got stuff going on and Im just not feeling myself right now.
You deserve to be and feel appreciated. You give so much, you deserve something in return.
You! Yes you!!
Iām loving it
im just so glad the word āughā was invented
Wait, is this� I had never noticed this
realisation of Steve not needing his help anymore
was this really necessary
Itās also Bucky being more than a little upset that they turned his gentle, harmless friendāwho Bucky wanted to PROTECT from the horrors of warāinto a fighting machine.
was that really necessary
itās also Bucky realizing that he can no longer protect his best friend no matter how hard he tries. heās utterly helpless now, even after the war is over. theyāll always be wanting steve to fight this or that, and bucky wonāt be able to do a darn thing to protect him.
#now was THAT really necessary
Itās also Bucky taking the 5 seconds he has of Steve notĀ paying attention to him so he can allow himself to process all these emotions without worrying Steve. If you watch Bucky through the movies, youāll notice he always makes sure to look like heās 100% fine if other people are looking at him. Fighting with Steve, but smiling at their dates. Recently tortured, but walking confidently by Steveās side. Basically a mess, but allĀ āLetās hear it for Captain America!ā Itās a pattern, really. Even in the flashback in CATWS, you can see he looks a lot less confident when Steve isnāt looking at him than when Steve is.
Also, Seb has mentioned that researching WW2, what left the deepest impression was how quickly everybody dies. You get attached to someone only to watch their heads being blown up in front of you the next day. Iām sure this influenced how he chose to act this scene. Because you can bet by the time this scene takes place, Bucky has seen many people - hell, maybe even friends - die, and recently, heās had to see his whole unit be killed or captured by HYDRA. This certainly plays a role here. Itās not just a general sense ofĀ āI canāt protect Steve anymore,ā itās more likeĀ āI donāt know if Steve will live till next week.ā Itās very real, very immediate. Itās a concrete prediction more than a vague fear. And if Steveās survives, thereās still the fact Bucky knowsĀ whatās like to be changed by war, and Steve will be changed by it, which Bucky certainly hates. Either way, he loses the Steve he knew, even more than heās already lost, with the wholeĀ āSteve Rogers is suddenly a super soldierā deal.
Iād say this scene is wartime Bucky in a nutshell. He handles the entire crowd and this whole Captain America propaganda thing without hesitation, he smiles at Steve and makes sure Steve enjoys the moment instead of pulling someĀ āI did my dutyā bullshit, and only thenĀ he allows himself to be overwhelmed by the fear that comes with being able to think 48923740 worst case scenarios in two seconds. If we can trust interviews with cast and crew, this eventually becomes his role in the war, basically - he thinks fast and does his job protecting Captain America and the missions, he takes care of Steve on a personal level by shielding him from the worst of the war as much as he can, and only then, if thereās time and Steve isnāt looking, he thinks about how the war is affecting him.
But anyway, overall, this scene is about overwhelming loss of everything Bucky knows, as well as an attempt to hide this as well as he can. And I donāt think itās a coincidence that in the 4th and 5th gifs, Seb looks a lot like comics!Bucky does when he says goodbye to his younger sister, thinking heāll never see her again and almost breaking down in tears, but unwilling to show her heās scared. For your reference:
Thanks S(a)tan