Today episode was triggering, there is no other way to put it. So I thought, if you are grieving as much as I am today, maybe this will help you a little bit.
I did this drawing almost 2 years ago,naming it "I'm out." I was listening to Dramamine, by Flawed Mangoes all the time, I was full of hope and nothing seemed impossible any more.
Believe me when I say that Evil Morty arc dragged me out of a dangerously crippling depression and gave me enough hope, focus and energy to finally realise that I was severely abused, that my life was actually in danger and that I had to remove myself from that situation. It was the final push I needed.
It was the first time I saw a fitting media representation of a scapegoat, successfully breaking free from narcissistic abuse, without all the mentally-deranged-super-villain bs that usually goes with these kind of characters. A representation that was speaking about my hopes, dreams, fears and grief, for the first time.
I could spend endless words trying to express how much this representation meant to me, and I couldn’t convey all of it.
I think now is a good moment to post this artwork because that’s how I will always remember this character: this is what, personally, I think would be a good representation of a scapegoat, finally beating their abusive system.
And about this episode, some reminder...
No, you are not invisible: even if your personal struggles find no accurate representation in media, your same difficulties are quietly shared by millions. You are not alone in this.
Achieving your independence and getting your cathartic revenge over your abusers doesn’t make you evil, doesn’t make you cocky, arrogant and you are not at risk of becoming a jerk because of it. You deserve your freedom, no matter what, everyone does.
No, you do not deserve to be beaten up by your abusers if you lash out at them or if you feel resentment towards them after they repeatedly push your limits: the only person you should apologies to, is yourself. This is called reactive abuse, and you should step away from it, for your own good. It doesn't make you a violent person or a mean one, your nervous system is simply in survival mode.
Is it fine to feel nostalgic about your abuser even if you it’s not good for you. Real life is not about a one-time jump towards the infinite, outside the CFC. Getting hoovered back doesn’t mean you are broken, faulty or that your whole odyssey to get free wasn’t real or worthy, it is just a normal phase, and it will help you to clear your mind.
This is a tv show and tv shows are made by people, sometimes smart and empathetic people, sometimes ignorant people, abusive people or simply incompetent people. You never know what you will get from them. But this doesn’t erase all the positive things you got from their stories. Those treasures are yours and only yours, because you managed to dig some precious lessons out of those stories: even if they can metaphorically kill one character, they cannot kill the idea you had of them and what they mean to you.
Be the Evil Morty you actually wanted to see.
(enjoy different vistas and some random filter spamming)
dawn on Venus
dawn on Forbodulon Prime
Parmesean dawn
dawn on Glorfingr 7
dawn on Venzenulon 7
Planet Squanch Vista
I'm not a victim of abuse and *I* was horrified by this episode.













