i dreamt about someone last night, a familiar yet new experience. I was cold from a flood and adventure of deep sea creatures. he said i looked cold and held me against his tall, sturdy bodyâŠ
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@goldenlotus93
i dreamt about someone last night, a familiar yet new experience. I was cold from a flood and adventure of deep sea creatures. he said i looked cold and held me against his tall, sturdy bodyâŠ
To find truth and love, I must make the ultimate sacrifice. Removing halfhearted love for a chance to discover what is meant for me. Believing in that whisper within me that I, too, deserve to be love the way I want.
That three hour drive felt the longest, thinking of my present, thinking about us, how did we get here, and wondering where did we go wrong.
Then it clicked. I knew. All along the trust was never really there. The one thing constant between the two of us was that one or the other will ruin us one way or another. We could dance around it blaming it on others but when itâs just you and me⊠we still destroy each other. So⊠that three long, stop and go freeway drive felt like eternity as I get a step closer to walking out the door and locking myself out of this.
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@golden_lotus
I know have no right to complain. I made my bed and I rolled around in it long enough. I had my cake and I ate it too. Iâm a committed personâs worst nightmare. My reasons were petty and unjustifiable. I break hearts and I do so coldly. So no, I have no right to complain about my pain, my grief, my heartbreak. But I want to. I need to in order to healâŠ
Like a Yoma, Iâve Awakened.
Ever seen one of those weirdos who scream into the abyss? Iâm those weirdos
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five years
it would seem that i have not felt the need to use this platform in five years, one month and one day. last i wrote was exceptionally dark. now that five years come and gone, i can say i have no choice but to reflect on this darkness before the actual dark.
it was nothing compare to this new chapter. i see light now even in the mist of pain and suffering. i can smile and laugh like normal again. i feel at ease in my own skin. almost completely confident even. i have a lot to be grateful for that i wasn't in the first tragedy. i am armed with therapeutic help, acceptance, support, and most of all, the love from my friends and family.
the one year anniversary of my little brother just passed and my heart trembles every time at the thought and mention of anything remotely similar to him. i felt i failed him. i thought i was helping and now in hindsight i was doing more harm than good by teaching a teenager the reality of life. what makes it worse is the last word i said to him. no, you can't borrow 20 dollars.
if only i stopped to think what was really going on with him before he asked me. he must have gone to everyone before he came to me, his oldest sister who usually has her shit together. if only i looked into his eyes when he asked me and see through the shame he was experiencing and talked it out with him. maybe he wouldn't have felt so alone. if only.
Scott Watanabe - http://scottwatanabe.tumblr.com - http://www.imdb.com/name/nm4078406 - http://www.gallerynucleus.com/artist/scott_watanabe - http://www.cartoonbrew.com/artist-of-the-day/scott-watanabe-89025.html - https://www.linkedin.com/in/scott-watanabe-6b3b2715
this is how you nip internalized self hatred in the bud
đđżđđđż!!!!!!!
âThe double agent for the patriarchy is basically just a woman who perhaps unknowingly is still putting the patriarchal narrative out into the world. Is still benefitting off, profiting off and selling a patriarchal narrative to other women. But itâs a wolf in sheepâs clothing. You know, just because you look like a woman, we trust you and we think youâre on our side, but you are selling us something that really doesnât make us feel good. Youâre selling us an ideal, a body shape, a problem with our wrinkles, a problem with ageing, a problem with gravity, a problem with any kind of body fat. Youâre selling us self-consciousness. The same poison that made you clearly develop some sort of body dysmorphia or facial dysmorphia, you are now pouring back into the world. Youâre like recycling hatred. I find that really dangerous and I think itâs unacceptable and I donât care if youâre a woman. I think constructive criticism is needed for anyone to ever evolve. For our gender to evolve we need some sort of constructive criticism. As long as we do it in a somewhat careful way. (âŠ) So many of the worst things in the world have happened motivated by greed. And I just donât think thatâs an acceptable excuse anymore. How much money do you need? Really how much money do you need? How much money do any of these huge influencers who are worth millions or billions sometimes⊠why are they still promoting appetite-suppressant lollipops to young girls? And itâs not a fight against obesity. They have young, already slim girls, in their adverts for Flat Tummy company, this company that are absolutely everywhere, and theyâre even being advertised in some of the most mainstream magazines, womenâs magazines, and they have a billboard in Times Square. The money is built on the blood and tears of young women who believe in them, who follow them, who look up to them like the big sister they never had. Itâs so upsetting and it feels like such a betrayal against women.â
Jameela Jamil explains why she thinks the Kardashians are âdouble agents for the patriarchyâ
How could someone say they give the right advice when they don't even know how to take one from others. Hypocrite.
Me
ânasa gone rogueâ sounds like theyâre stealing rockets and going to the moon illegally or something
but nope, ârogueâ these days is a word that means âposting real climate change facts that your president doesnât want you to knowâ
like if you support nasa posting real climate change facts that the orange dictator doesnât want you to know. reblog if you support nasa stealing rockets and going to the moon illegally.
Healing a Loss
That's something you can't really repair in a short time-not even in a decade. Just enjoy the little and big things in life. They'll always be there in your heart and you'll always yearn for them, whether you want to or not, and this pain is undeniable. What you can do is find yourself with every person you meet, regardless of age and gender, and befriend them. It won't be a direct heal, but over time, your sad memory and broken heart will slowly ease. It will be nature. Don't get me wrong, you'll always have relapses of those sorrow, but when you do, you would realized how far you've come. You're better now. Every small steps count and that is true.