Hyperion retro bird

To the moon and above the stars! [Borderlands oc rp/ask blog] pfp by okktober-draws

[goldgrubeherman]

Well, well, well. Let me introduce myself

My name is Herman. Herman Goldgrube and I'm a high qualified Hyperion diplomat.

I've been working for Hyperion almost 21 years already, so you might think that i know some things and you're damn right. I'll be honest with you, darlings, it's hard to be one of the best, but if you want to live in the system, you have to adjust.

It's eat or be eaten. It's not enough to be smart, you have to be smarter, slier, faster if you want to reach the stars.

Ah, and another thing. You can press the [ send email ] button and send an ask about things you might want to know about me or my lovely job for the Hyperion corporation.

See you around~

[goldgrubeherman]

Herman! How do you feel about Handsome Jack?

About Handsome Jack:

Handsome Jack? Oh yes! Let's talk about my boss (well, former boss now, but doesn't matter). Let's just say that... He was my role model at first, when i just got here and stuff, but... Let's not speak badly about the dead man.

Regardless, Hyperion was on top when he was in charge and now we're slowly losing our top places on the market, unfortunately. That's sad. And don't look at me like I'm some kind of a crazy fanatic with shelves of Hyperion merch with his face! NOT all of us, hyperions, collecting stuff like that, but you know. I had a calendar or two with him ONLY because my colleague gifted it to me.

— HG.

[goldgrubeherman]

Hello

Yes, I have a question.

Why won't they give me an intern to help with whelps?

They can't get killed by it. I have an extensive budget.

-

Robin

Head of Skag Breeding and Rearing

Okay, listen up, kid.

I'm diplomat. Not an HR or some office rakk that does nothing unless making decisions on things like that. I'm working with things MUCH more important than these creatures. How am i supposed to know why they can't give you an intern?

Oh, maybe it's because you're actually doing your job just fine all by yourself, or maybe it's simply because we should focus on making guns and gun-related stuff and not "researching" that disgusting pandoran dogs?

Nothing personal, darling, but you got the wrong person to ask something like that. Cheers.

- HG

[barbie-from-blands]

Dear diary,

today I stumbled upon a bag full of big wads of cash lying on the ground in the middle of the street. Naturally, as any sane person would, I immediately deposited this cash into my bank account. I'm rich!

Or I thought I was.

A few hours later, I was detained by some Atlas brochachos suspecting me of fraud. As if I would ever stoop so low and make commit money laundering! The only scam here is that off-putting shade of red they still keep on their uniforms. Someone needs to hire a designer asap, those outfits are way past retro.

Love ya!

Angie

[goldgrubeherman]

Alright.

And what is wrong with retro? It's classic! It's style!

You know what? I'm not blaming Atlas for this pathetic attempts to be stylish, cause their weapon and overall design still needs a lot of work to at least try to reach the quality, style, comfort and accuracy level that Hyperion Corporation may offer to their consumers. (Damn, and i am not even working for the marketing department)

— HG