Lizard Corner

Liz (she/her) How did you get this number

[greenplantlizard]

ryusoulger post-series specials!!!

thanks to COVID, the release of these got delayed a few months, and so im watching them here instead of on the kiramager side!!!

Part Legacy of the Master's Soul

wouldn't that be masters' souls? there's more than one

anyway let's learn about the ryusoulgers backstory folks!

WOMAN

ahem

this is isuka, and she can kill you all instantly

anyway over to the people i remember from the show

look koh you've got a whole bunch of character development still ahead of you dude

anyway hey remember the premise of ryusoulger?

isuka seems very eager for someone i don't recognise

wow a technique that you seek unwilling to talk about but insist you learned on your own by yourself,,,?

hmmmmm what could possibly happen here,,,,

even more backstory!!!

look we've got to choose pupils that will have interesting dynamics with each other, but still be good-hearted enough to be superheroes for kids, it's a complex process

also this is hana and she's the world's biggest master red fan

well he won't be the only red ryusoulger for much longer,,,

oh boy, looks like a series of television is about to begin soon!

nada reference

im sure he's doing just fine

unlike hana, who's just found another minusaur!

and has a familiar technique,,, hmmmmm

what's hana's deal then,,,

now isuka's suspect!

and now every ryusoulger except canalo has been seen or referenced!!

meanwhile let's check on master blue's mysterious backstory woman, mayu!

she's got all sorts of information on the ryusoul tribe, but was unfortunately passed over for ryusoul blue status in favour of a certain blue-haired boy

(melto's hair was blue from birth,,, confirmed)

anyway, isuka's using a dangerous technique, but not one she came up with!!!

master red's figured out hana's up to something!

yeah so he might have killed her father

welp

PART 2

so it turns out isuka met with master red's evil former disciple nire, introduced right now, to tell him about the ryusoulger tribe's toy collection

mayu's cool, i wish she was thought of when the show was happening

anyway nire's wandering around being an asshole

well thank god there wasn't a teacher-student romance-

anyway he wants that touy

OH YEAH kanaesoul's the wish one right? wonder what he'll wish for

so hana's dad was going to be ryusoul red? hmmm that's as much motivation for nire to want to kill him if anything,,,

meanwhile isuka is perhaps too committed to violence

,,,hmmmmm that's not a minusaur energy drain,, i think that one's down to the technique!!!

you fell for the trap! you were too focused on being physically strong that you forgot about being kind!

and nire taught her the technique, so,,,,,,,,

yep it's all his big plan!!!

lucky the masters are able to communicate over long distances despite not seeming to have that much technology?

oh no nire has the thing!!!

and he wants to bring hana's dad back from the dead,,,?

,,,but actually he didn't have the real one, we'll see the real one in the show

meanwhile in the woods, there's a minusaur!

so now did hana birth the minusaur,,? but then why would it use that technique,,,,,?

PART 3

it's cameos again!!!

damn what a dick

so it turns out hiragi's death was not in fact an accident

sir you have to be specific about the wins you're acknowledging

... mainly because nire actually killed hiragi

hiragi birthed a minusaur, nire and master red couldn't kill it, so nire killed him, on his demand no less

a lot less evil than he initially seemed, is nire

not a great guy, but no moustache twirling here

many complicated feelings for hana

ok master red but you've got to understand that you didn't actually kill him, like you didn't literally actually kill him you do understand this yes

anyway, it's minusaur time!

and thus, it was defeated!

all's well that ends,,,,, well,,,,,,,,,,,,

wow yeah it sure would suck if tragedy like this repeated again

AH FUCK IT'S NOT DEAD

AAAAND IT WAS NIRE'S

ah crap

oh fuck is THAT where the complete minusaur at the beginning of ryusoulger came from?

FUUUUCK HE DID KILL THE PREVIOUS MASTER RED FOR SELFISH REASONS

i mean he feels immense guilt about it,,,,,,, which is what the minusaur just consumed all of

anyway, let's give koh some important lessons

and thus, the show happened

and the students the masters chose weren't great at it, but they really did pull through when it counted, which it frequently did

Part Memory of Soulmates

wanna hear about a funny thing that happened during the story of ryusoulger?

trust me, it won't take long

no really this movie, shown at the same spring triple-bill as the delayed kiramager summer movie, is just shy of 15 minutes, which is a new record even for sentai!!!

RIP mana kinjo, actress of ui :(

to get us up to speed on where we are, we've just freed nada from the curse connected to the gaisoulg armour, and he's joined the team! im sure he'll be there for a long time

YAY WISERUE AND KLEON ARE IN THIS MOVIE

look nada's trying his best

dimevolcano is just Like That

CANALO NO CALM DOWN MAN A WOMAN IS DYING

anyway we're asking the important questions,,, where does nada stand in the roll call?

oop, no time, there's people getting possessed about the place!

that's maiko from earlier! but she sure seems different

despite insisting she can't change

aha! it's a budget-saving human-looking minusaur!

and the ryusoulgers can't change either!!!

i guess gaisoulg's hatred-absorption abilities do come in handy after all,,,,, as long as we don't cause the whole people-possessing sentient evil armour thing to happen again it's probably fine

anyway remember, you can always start again!

anyway, maiko's internal struggles about the slowness of personal growth have been externalised,,, so how are we going to get out of this one?

well we've got to fight in human form of course!

DAMN WHAT

i guess gaisoulg can completely absorb a minusaur, that's,,,, wow that's a neat trick

wiserue yodels away

and thus nada has become a new and reliable member of the team!

anyway it turns out she could change fine, she wanted her parent's failing ping pong parlour business to change into a café, but they didn't want it

but yeah, go nada, long may you live!!!

,,,,,what?

[greenplantlizard]

the zi-o/decade specials!!!

the heisei era may be over,,, but that doesn't mean it's over!!!

WARNING: TOSHIKI INOUE

BEWARE, SPOILERS ABOUND FOR DECADE VS ZI-O AND ZI-O VS DECADE. IF YOU HAVEN'T EXPERIENCED THEM, I'D STRONGLY SUGGEST YOU DO SO BEFORE READING THIS

THESE SPECIALS ARE SO COMPLETELY BATSHIT THAT THEY SHOULD BE EXPERIENCED AS BLIND AS POSSIBLE

Part Decade VS Zi-O

it would seem that a weird and mysterious mansion is appear

and all sorts of people are inside!!! from all sorts of different walks of life

and they're all stuck in the middle of a tiny island

also did i mention one of the people is sougo tokiwa?

PART 1!!!

hey look it's that jester mask they keep bringing back

anyway they're here to play a game, and apparently whoever wins gets to be king of the world!

sougo's pretty excited, he's always wanted to be a king don't you know

anyway everyone go find a chair outside this room ready go

no-one's broken any noses for it yet

awww the schoolgirl has the spirit of co-operation

yakuza guy didn't wanna play so we're gonna summon another ryuki now

y'know, as you would normally do in a game show, death by a monster that shouldn't even exist

very normal time here nothing abnormal or mysterious has happened

old man believes in bribery

housewife believes in being bribed

i love watching characters go crazy and have their flaws gradually magnify by being dropped into a situation they don't understand and can't control

game 2: find a pot

now this is where noses are gonna get broken methinks

ok old man fucking sucks

welp, the housewife didn't make it, this is a loss for the trans community

and the old man is dead? stabbed, in fact

which can only mean one thing,,,,, there's a murderer!!!!

AND ALSO TSUKASA KADOYA KAMEN RIDER DECADE IS HERE

YEAH OK WHATEVER

ending song is a banger, i have actually heard both versions of this before, they're both good though i prefer this one (the decade version)

PART 2

top 10 awkward dinners of history

anyway so tsukasa knows what's happening here

the mansion is on top of a gap in dimensions, this is a game that's been repeating many times, and this whole thing has been set up by the real sougo, who's destined to be ohma zi-o and has run out of power

but why would sougo set up a murder game?

AMONG- sorry

well basketball sougo seems nice, and the lawyer seems like an asshole, but you can't trust him because,,,, well according to tsukasa anyone could be a monster from dimension murder but honestly any dimension can be dimension murder if you get murdered there

tsukasa has joined the bizarro games

game 3!!! rock paper scissors

damn who made these wack ass games

aw man,,,,,,,,, the secret true sting of the game is revealed!

welp, schoolgirl has decided to get herself executed, in the hopes that basketball sougo will ultimately win

well,,, fuck

and more themed food has appeared!

lawyer is going more cartoon evil

meanwhile tsukasa is dedicated to winning in order to solve whatever the fuck is going on in this plot

game 4! hide-and-seek, another ryuki seeks

welp,,, lawyer has been got,,,, by the murderer!!!

still, that counted

and he wished for the next food to be poisoned, thanks asshole

PART 3

utilitarian tsukasa

what if someone else is also here- hi ohma zi-o

basketball sougo has decided enough is enough

welcome to the final stage!!! find the treasures, and use them until one person remains,,, also another ryuki will attack random people

basically it's a battle royale situation

KAITOU MENTION

anyway yeah the treasures are weapons, it really is a battle royale situation

hey kid, you ever used an antique gun before?

rip actress lady, and also kid

now's a good time to mention the increasing amounts of fake blood every time someone gets hit with the axe

ive no idea if the fact the amount keeps increasing and it looks more and more obviously fake is an intentional joke but it's very funny

basketball sougo quits,,,, aaaand he's been hit by a flying greenscreen axe!!!

it's just tsukasa and yuusuke apparently

which makes yuusuke the murderer,,, as the most unassuming member of the group with no traits that made him stand out, except being a dead ringer for a.r. kuuga he was the obvious suspect

welp, that sucks for tsukasa

ALSO BASKETBALL SOUGO IS A ROBOT FROM A UNIVERSE WHERE ALL THE HUMANS GOT TURNED INTO ROBOTS

ALSO IT KID IS DEMOST FROM JIRAIYA FROM A DIMENSION WHERE EVERYONE IS SPACE NINJAS WHAT THE FUCK

ALSO SCHOOLGIRL WAS A GHOST THE WHOLE TIME

WHAT THE ACTUAL EVERLOVING FLYING

F U C K

ahem

NARUTAKI??????????????????????????

WHAT IN THE UNHOLY SHIT IS HAPPENING??????

so,,, hold on, so,,,

"real" (evil) sougo fell down a dimensional manhole one day (how??? why???) and created a death game to get someone to take his place so he could repeat

but narutaki who is here hasn't found one yet, because he serves the true sougo(????????? since WHEN?????)

anyway uh decade's going to stop this absolutely wankery, i suppose

as is robot basketball zi-o

it's time for big battle!!!

something sure is happening

hey decade take this toy to the followup series of specials, im sure someone will want to use it

then ohma zi-oh exploded everything

so now sougo's high school is in the middle of a wasteland and he's the only one there

TO BE CONTINUED

,,,once again

WHAT

Part Zi-O VS Decade

looks like the wasteland is full of inves!!!

because why not

it's just high schoolers and inves as far as the eye can see

and also, multiple zi-os!!!

and all of them are sougo tokiwa

PART 1!!!

huere gay moment???

what a normal school day in the middle of the inves apocalypse wasteland

geiz is homophobic

see it's like a zombie movie but the zombies are inves

and there's all the fake blood!!! and body parts too!!!

principal swartz thinks its good that they died

"FORGET ABOUT WHAT'S GOING ON"

principal swartz wishes to ignore reality and focus on the illusion of high school

and so,,, romance club!!!

a definitely non-toxic addition to high school!!!

ora is a self-professed master of love don't you know

by the way did i mention that these specials are written by toshiki inoue? this might be a good time to mention that, it seems relevant

the school is also running out of food

geiz has nominated himself camp counsellor

tsukuyomi was off doing volunteer work when this all went down so she's not here, sad

things are really going downhill

meanwhile in the woods,,,, it's tsukuyomi!!! seems she has not escaped the zombie-inves-infested wilderness after all

it's always good to see kamen rider tsukuyomi out and about!

the time has come for class president baseball cap sougo to go into the wilderness with his girlfriend misa on their motorbike

meanwhile back with apparently normal sougo

principal swartz has some terrible relationship advice

what the absolute fuck is happening here

we're just gonna slide on past that scene

sougo's terrible festival

cease festivities!!! baseball cap sougo has arrived at apparently normal sougo's school!!!

baseball cap sougo is the heart-themed zi-o

apparently normal sougo is the apparently normal zi-o

geiz is geiz

geiz is also confused

oh hi glasses sougo

it would appear there are three of him! how far can this rabbit hole go

also tsukasa has a jeep

PART 2!!!

so all the sougos' schools are different names

swartz suggests a name scheme, apparently normal -> a, baseball cap -> b, glasses -> c

three sougos? this can only mean one thing!!!!!!!!!!

a class president election between all of them!!!

obviously!!!

what else would it mean?

oh hi woz

woz is here to explain

all the different sougos are from different dimensions, and we're in a world made of multiple fused dimensions that has no future, resting entirely on the existence of sougo, or sougos

got that?

good cause we've gotta win a class president election!!!

tsukuyomi has come across a small child with amnesia

sougo c wants economic strength in a world with no economy

sougo b is platforming on airhorns

im not entirely sure sougo a has the vote of his fish, tbh

he's fine with this, he's had character development

hey is that another sougo?

terrible haircut sougo has been hunted down by tsukasa, and executed by decade shot

well,,,, ok then

something squidgy is happening

so it turns out principal swartz is remedying the food situation by making school dinners out of inves meat

y'know i really thought it was going to be human meat for a minute there

ah crap, inves breach!

sougo c is acting suspicious around here

wow, terrible cover sougo c

eat your alien zombie meat, kids!

meanwhile tsukuyomi doesn't know what the hell's happening here or how to help this kid at all

oh hey he remembers where he lives? that's useful

ora and heure are the only members of the romance club left

ora may have romance advice rooted in misogyny, but she's a bisexual ally

ok heure there's such a thing as being too forward

what else could possibly happen?

sougo c leaving heure to die by monsters as a trap for sougo a of course!!!

of course!!!

oh yo they've still got time jacker powers! that's handy

seems no-one's gonna get out of the zi-o post series with the ending intact

ah, tsukasa is finally here to kill more sougos

but it looks like sougo a has already died!!!

did anyone call for juvenile delinquent sougo and teddy bear sougo?????? no? well too bad, sougos 5 and 6 coming right at you!!!

did swartz nearly count the sougo decade killed?

anyway, delinquent -> d, teddy bear -> e, i guess that makes bowl cut (rip) sougo f?

woz here with the infodump: every world that collided here has a sougo, and whichever sougo wins may save the worlds, but wins what? the student president race? the battle for survival???

meanwhile on tsukuyomi's forest adventures, she gets to fight some more inves zombies, and get some nasty cuts!!! yay!!!

sougo e is platforming on teddy bears, while sougo d is platforming on a campaign of wanton violence!

sougo stocks have never been more down

anyway, misa was the traitor to sougo c, because actually "sougo c" is sougo a, and the "sougo a" who died was sougo c!!!

,,,but sougo a didn't kill him, that was decade

who's here to kill even more sougos!!!

he's here to kill the true sougo, as in the last set of specials

sougo d, you may not be long for this world

yup, there he goes,,,, rip

tsukuyomi camping time

hey what if this kid's real name is sougo tokiwa and he was the one true sougo

wouldn't that be crazy

anyway, tsukasa might be disintegrating

everyone spend one last tender moment with someone before the final battle!

"you said you had no friends... but maybe i could be one" "no." genuinely made me giggle

anyway, tsukasa has broken down the barriers, let the massacre begin!!!

in the middle of the school president vote!!!

anyway so apparently the true sougo is causing all the parallel universes to collapse into a singularity full of zombie inves, and decade's sick of that happening

the true sougo we now learn is whichever sougo is still capable of becoming the evil ohma zi-o

tsukuyomi has finally found sougo a

I FUCKING KNEW IT

THE KID IS THE TRUE SOUGO

which means, it's ohma time!!!

hey tsukasa ever wanted to kill a child?

this reminds me of kamen rider 555

ok so he's not actually a child, he just "destroyed and created so many worlds" that he turned back into one

as one does

TEDDY BEAR POWERED ZI-O

rip sougo e

anyway so true sougo is gathering sougos to find the best sougo to then steal the body of, and now only a and b remain

absolutely wild shit

but wait!!! because exactly one person voted in the election, so sougo a is class president!!!

it is thus decided, sougo a is the best sougo, which means he has the dubious honour of getting to fight ohma zi-o to avoid having his body stolen

am i getting this plot straight?

HEURE NOOOOO

bury your bisexuals i guess :(

and with that,,, final battle time!!!

also decade has a new final form

decade complete 21 in fact

and it's

it's uh

it's hilariously bad

i think the cards stapled to the cape really make it

also also swartz is another decade again, and he's here to help i think?

shoulda called this one zi-o vs zi-o

or zi-o vs zi-o vs zi-o vs zi-o vs zi-o vs zi-o vs zi-o vs decade

anyway ohma zi-o is too strong!!!

his low framerate attacks are too powerful!!!

even decade cannot hope to defeat him!!!!!!!

hey take robot sougo's special 2020 special edition saber watch!!!

zi-o's saber form is just one of the decade ones, which after all the rest of the batshit is a little disappointing, but it's a post-series special so it's understandable

tsukuyomi tells him to knock it off, and in that moment of distraction, the true sougo is defeated

it's true what they say, even the most powerful of godlike beings cannot beat the power of new toy

and now sougo has defeated his future, literally as well as figuratively

and tsukasa can finally perish

but hey now everything's back to normal!!! hooray!

i don't know what normal is anymore!

,,,,oh sougo b and misa are still here

uh,,

have fun!!!

but could the possibility for sougo to fall into his dark future still exist?

of course it does, but it's not going to happen

anyway, swartz and ora are time jackets again, and heure might be resurrectable through time travel bullshit

woz seems pretty sure time travel bullshit can bring anyone back

and thus the mistakes of several men are left for a woman to take charge of the clean up, same as it ever was,,,,,,

follow all that? me neither don't worry

y'know what? for a crossover between the two most completely bullshit (affectionate and derogatory) rider series,,,, i think these were very appropriate, inoue stickiness aside i had a lot of fun :D

[greenplantlizard]

zero-one others!!!

it's time to see the zero-one post series movies!!!

how badly has everyone been getting on

Part MetsuBouJinRai

first, let's check in with our friends and acquaintances who were affiliated with mbjr.net,,,

the country flags are concerned about ark

this is leon arkland, the president of zaia USA, and definitely an all-round evil guy!!

ive only seen him for like a minute and he's definitely evil

hey look, as is there!!! he's definitely definitely evil!!!

so this guy is our next candidate to be ark it would seem

WE'RE

how many times have they showed this exact promo video

anyway, aruto is in space right now, launching satellites to allow humagears to go global

and our former mbjr.net rather and son duo are watching for new arks,,,, just in case

i mean you think it'd just be a case of letting everyone live happily, but there are societal barriers in place in many parts of the world which act to stop that happening, and-

hold that thought, there's some threatening guys here

this seems like some sort of ethical violation

these are the solds!!! who im sure we'll discover more about

and leon arkland (very subtle name btw), is kamen rider zaia©!!! a.k.a. the better looking version of thouser™

you know what that means? that means it's battle time!!!

LMAO at zaia© exclaiming like a fighting game boss "come on!" "is that your best?!"

his finisher move is copyrighted!!! damn even thouser™ got around to that!!!

soooo they got jin

hey there gai! you seem to be on top of things

unfortunately the ceo can violate any and all company policy apparently, including having his subordinate strangle someone which in any other circumstances would be a major hr violation

anyways time for jin to learn a little more of the evil up close!

hey they even draw attention to how on the nose his name is!!! ,,,covering for it by revealing it's the other way round, the evil ai was named after him

SO, the mystery of jin's resurrection is revealed!

he was resurrected to act as the prototype of the solds, military-type humagears created as unfeeling war machines!!!

OH FUCK

anyway naki is here hi naki!!

and raiden is here hi raiden!!!

damn horobi you put gps trackers in your son???

aaand now jin's been connected to evil.net the mass brain system

it's the big computer that overrides the free will of the solds!!! yay!!!

YOUR OPINION HAS BEEN REJECTED

LOG OFF

wow!!! this is one of the most fucked up things to happen in kamen rider zero-one specifically!!! which is saying something!!!

so what horrible trap has everyone else walked into

an ethical black hole tech demo! how utterly horrifying!!!

well we can't possibly let this continue

let's go team mbjr!

LMAO what an oddly-placed bit

there's some fun bits to this fight though

aaaaaand there goes jin's brain

jin was really THE character to put through this, a continuation and direct challenge to his struggles earlier in the show

horobi and naki basically already went through this to a great or lesser extent, and raiden isn't enough of a character to stand up to that much focus

oop and now everyone else is in here too

the power of collective unity!!!

multiple people thinking together is a lot harder to ignore than one alone

that being said, what if we all fused together into one guy now, while absolutely destroying the framerate

here he comes, the will of the four people, kamen rider metsuboujinrai!!!

"we will destroy you all"

hmmm, sounds a little ominous

mbjr has no time for zaia©'s video game boss antics

hmmmmmmmmmm arkland seems to enjoy that,,, troubling

he's trying to create a monster to then sell weapons to fight against

ah fuck he's smart, creating an entirely justified boogeyman that he can then sell weapons to get people to try to stop

aaaaaand he just killed as

well shit

i mean, the thing is,,, jin is right

weighing up the potential human casualties against the current humagear lives already being destroyed

it's a difficult question

meanwhile arkland is stirring up shit

in attacking him, they run the risk of becoming his monster, but if they don't, then he will just he emboldened

"ok i know what jin said sounded threatening but we're not actually opposing you specifically" "it's time for our crusade to begin!" ok jin your pr skills may need work but you have the spirit

hey look horobi even fuwa's like "i mean you probably have a good reason to be doing violence"

horobi i feel like you're drawing a false equivalence here

yeah see you're fine

you're so fine

everything is so fucked but you're so fine

anyway here comes everyone's favourite kamen rider build villain, kamen rider zaia©!!!

get it? it's because of the war profiteering

anyway, let's summon monkey ball junior (mbjr)

there goes my framerate!!!

GO TO UTOPIA

arkland doesn't seem so sure of himself this time huh

they might just have turned themselves into a killing machine to free the solds yes

i mean killing people is generally bad but i think honestly fuwa in this particular case you can let this one slide

wait hold on what are you doing

U M

U M

for those of you watching at home, mbjr just destroyed the bodies of the four humagears that created them and then levelled the zaia building with a frieza death ball

and so the awful horrible wheel of politics churns over more bodies, and will continue to do so,,, as the government has ordered yua to destroy mbjr!!!

well shit

Part Vulcan & Valkyrie

so, following that cliffhanger,,,

yua's life really is just one big tragedy, shuffled from one job where she's not allowed to express her true opinions to another

maybe she should quit being a cop, she ever think about that?

but nope, she's being a cop today,,,, saddening

even she doesn't think mbjr's done anything that makes them a threat to all humanity,,, but nope, the minister of defence was waiting for an excuse to kill off any and all humagears, so hunt down mbjr it is,,,,,,

gai did in fact survive the destruction of the zaia building in case you were wondering, he was in the sub-basement and is up and making villain speeches already!!!

can't a unified entity take a silent and ominous stroll through the underpass these days?

ok mbjr you've gotta work on your communication

your approach to abolishing the police also may draw concern

like you don't actually have to kill them

mbjr is perhaps a little strong

anyway the solds get to employ free will! yay for the solds!

our two main ones appear to have reached opposite philosophical viewpoints, and never the twain shall meet

bad day to be on aims right now

bad day to be a humagear,,, and humagears get a lot less good days

"just because a lot of people agree on something doesn't mean it's right"

one thing i do like about these is they don't present us with an Answer

they show us what the characters think and do, but not yet has the narrative provided us with a definitive "this is right"

at the very least, it doesn't condemn mbjr for taking down zaia, and condemns zaia for what happened there, because arkland was so transparently evil

ultimately, i think the narrative does want us to question the characters, and whether we think what we're doing is right, it rejects blind obedience

well yua, personally i believe that soldiers are made to function as tools, and that's part of why there shouldn't be soldiers, the other part being their whole thing is killing people

see you're fighting to protect life, but you're in service of the status quo, which does not entirely do that, yua,,, do you see the conflict

ultimately the other message of the narrative is don't kill people

which is, y'know

yeah don't do that

which is why valkyrie is now going to kill mbjr wait hang on what

fucking cops oh my god

see normally i have less of a problem with this because the narrative isn't generally as invested in this discussion

anyway uh valkyrie final form, we got one, for all of like,,,, a minute

see in the discussion around the girl that yaiba keeps seeing,,, there's an implicit understanding

the understanding that it was ok for the terrorist to also die

anyway so it turns out that mbjr was attacking yua specifically to goad fuwa into go out and destroy them

god FUCKING DAMMIT

AUGH

y'know i was so on board up until about 5 minutes ago

ah well let's see if they pull it back

how's aruto doing

i mean killing aims ain't great

at the same time humagears are proven sentient beings at this point, and having an organisation of humans, who are still the ruling class here, to police them and kill them if they step out of line is fucked, right?

anyway, mbjr is actually trying to get fuwa to destroy them, to show that a committment to violence in the name of justice can lead to evil

see this is why "justice" should be focused on helping the victims and not demolishing the perpetrators-

anyway, fuwa's going to kill mbjr now,,,, with the power of his own company,,,?

well i guess we have final-er form vulcan now,,?

see i think mbjr did use their hearts for the right reasons

it's when justice means retribution and revenge alone that it becomes a problem

anyway wow yua is here! i thought this movie was called vulcan & valkyrie,,, but i guess it was just called vulcan with valkyrie mostly in the first half

welp, rip mbjr,,, and also fuwa apparently

well at least yua learned something, to keep this from being completely depressing

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,oof

[greenplantlizard]

saber 40-47 & extra chapter!!! (END)

BONNE LECTUUuuUuURE

RETURN TO SABER

where is luna, the plot's happening

by the power of solomon, ryoga's been turned eeeeeeevil!!!

aw maaaaan,,,

anyway, yuri's going into the wonder world with the sword of darkness to find luna, and everyone else gets to go do,,, other stuff!!!

and isaac gets to do big villain poses in the woods and summon his giant fist

so ryo and daishinji are off to stop bloodlust ryoga, and the primary colour trio + yuri who completed his mission real fucking quick get to fight isaac/solomon!!!

rip yuri

awwww yeaaaa it's finally like in the the opening to the damn show!!!

hey luna wanna hear a loredump?

BLACK HOLE, BLACK HOLE, REVOLUTIO-

damn isaac's been kind of a jobber lately

oh no not his evil beam!!! now blades and espada are eeeeeeevil!!!!

so luna is basically the abstracted personification of the wonder world itself, and touma's going to disappear if he saves the world, never to see his friends again because she became special-er friends with him

wow luna gets to make a choice? no not really

angst circle angst circle

wowowow the power of friendship!!!!!!! and also the power of just really hating this fucking guy

damn even yuri refuses the evil beam

and ryoga too! took him long enough

you know what that means? it means saber gets ANOTHER form!!!

so xross is like,,, one of his final forms

featuring saber is a fun name though

and thus, isaac gets be defeated as a pathetic, lonely man

mei where did you come from???

and there goes the omniforce book! good riddance LMAO

hell yeah for friendship and such

wow it's like the beginning of the end credits and everything

but don't get comfortable yet, there's one more arc to go, and one villain left!!!

damn isaac managed to push that thing back together? give up dude

welp, looks like isaac isn't destined to be one of those rider villains who gets tiresome,,,,, because storious just fucking disintegrated him with minimal fanfare

LMAO kind of a fitting death for such an over the top villain

and so the final villain will be,,,, STORIOUS!!!

,,,,,,whoever the fuck he is

im gonna be honest i found all three megid villains utterly boring since the start, but at least storious has cool eyeshadow and a voice changer now,,? that's something!

BONNE LECTUUUUUUURE

storious says it's final arc time

i mean he's not wrong stories do work so much better when they actually end, that's why i enjoy the fact that these shows have different stories with different casts every season, it stops things feeling stale

of course he's the villain so i think i have an idea what his idea of an "ending" is

,,,so we should probably give this tale a different one

WAHOOO SUMMER FESTIVAL TIME

look you've gotta enjoy those moments of peace while they last

time for desast and storious to have a duel!!!

desast doesn't want things to end yet, he hasn't completed his arc!!!

so he's falchion now i guess

oh hey most of the cast haven't even met tassel huh

tassel's here for the infodump!!!

basically he used to be a guy called victor who wondered why people know things, and set out on a journey with 4 others to find the secret source of all knowledge and solve everyone's problems

this turned out to have the worst consequences to any road trip ever conceived

a woman showed up and gave victor a book containing all knowledge, which then created the wonder world

victor sent all his friends there, and three of them decided to become evil like immediately, each steal a page and turn into ripoff organisation xiii

basically storious wants to write the story of the world, and also end it, because he can

then everything exploded, 2000 year war, sword of logos founded, sword of logos created like 5 other supervillains, and that's where we are now!!!

so all that could have gone better, but at the very least victor wasnt to know all this would happen, and tried many times to stop it despite having no real presence in the real world, unlike a certain other someone from another series,,, edith

anyway how's desast doing, there seems to be a charybdis megid here now

it also seems to be allergic to dying

so yeah upshot is if touma saves the world, he vanished, but if he doesn't, he doesn't get to keep his promise to luna,,, and also y'know, doesn't save the world

FUCKING BIT HIM?

bye desast

so obviously touma's going to meet with luna,,, but he's intending to take option c, because of course he is

he will change the future, he will not let it happen!

anyway there goes a mountain

ren have you finished your arc yet?

he's working on it

biting its way through to the wonder world

oh no now its arm is more large!

ah man, it's absorbing powers from anyone it's ever bitten!

that's probably not ideal

poor buster and slash, the yamcha and tenshinhan of this series

anyway, desast is dying and wants ren to kill him,,, not that he's saying that he's pretending he's gone full evil, but it's not hard to work out what his real goal is

oh hi there storious your voice changer's back on

yeah im sure luna will definitely be here soon,,,

oh nooooo not tassel,,,,,,, however will i cope with this tragic turn of events,,,,,,,,,,,

wow how funny, woman is bad at cooking, never seen that joke before

how desast's death going?

well,,,

ren won't kill him

so that's kinda put a fly in his ointment

anyway yeah all this cooking made us forget storious is in the middle of enacting his big evil plan!

OOPS

tassel's ready to give it up to the next generation,,,, and storious is ready to make him do it

we're really pulling for themes here, and while i think they're good i also think they could have been introduced a little soon, because my reaction to tassel dying is part indifference and also part relief, im afraid

WELP there goes the wonder world! it really is endgame time!

just a friendly ramen disagreement between foes while desast waits to die and ren draws close to concluding his character arc in a remarkably natural-feeling way for this show

man,,, desast is SO close to being an interesting character, he's S O close he's practically touching it

anyway the world's gonna end unless touma gives himself up for it,, or if we get tassel's book back from storious

now everyone using their sword actually has a defensive purpose like it's supposed to!!! wow!!!

i have lost count of what number apocalypse this is

anyway storious is here because of course he is

hey desast, bad time to have decided to goad someone into killing you

angst angst angst angst angst

aw he thinks he's looking out for ren,,,

barrier achieved!!!

meanwhile, storious is doing,, uh,,, something?

post-credits scene?

next episode, and desast is still dying!!!

ren has much to think about

people keep forgetting to tell each other important information lately

rintaro is a self-admitted abnormal homo sapiens

ryoga has now apologised for the first time in his entire life, and i think mei is right to treat him like a dog for it

anyway, at long last, storious is about to wait no hold on more scenes need to happen first

ah there it is!

and the shindai siblings are here to help! wow!!! im sure they won't both get defeated in seconds to show how powerful storious is now no way!!!

how's ren doing? bad

i mean he's winning now but it means he's going to tragically give desast the death he wants, so like i wouldn't say he's doing good as cathartic as it is

aw maaaaan :')

i wish we'd spent more time with these two, at least like this when they were interesting

but a relationship this toxic means one will destroy the other, sooner or later

in this case, literally

anyway wasn't storious going to do something?

he was going to feed all the people he's turned into books to the charybdis megid, of course!!!

and also his clone of sophia that he now has, don't worry about it, unless you need to worry about it later

time to team up with the encyclopedia siblings!!!

hmmm this is less than ideal

nah the siblings have got this

reika if you say the word oniisama one more time i will write a fanfic that kills him off

storious has been eaten, charybdis megid is the main villain now

LMAO just kidding, storious just wanted it to contain all the powers he possibly could, to then synthesise the book containing all knowledge, and start the endgame!!!

obviously, as one does

and ren eats a very sad, lonely ramen,,, :')

so the world is doomed

and storious is summoning zombies because we have four episodes left

that barrier didn't last all that long

here come the giant books!!!

wow it's like the early episodes except there's no way into the greenscreen world!

meanwhile luna's like so almost a character

storious is here to show he's a real kamen rider now

he's got a fun evil henshin sound i gotta admit, i like it :D

aw shit, the four divine sages? i may have jumped the gun calling them the shittenou for isaac, but apparently they're fulfilling this role as evil zombies here!

they're like,,, not quite kamen riders, but they do have everyone's techniques

WAS THE THE FRIEZA DEATH BALL?

anyway, storious saw evol do this, so he's going to make a big end of the world tower with a bunch of fights on each floor!!!

AND the wonder ride books are going to run out of juice!!!

kento's done being all doom and gloom though

so let's all start gearing up to tackle the big videogame final level tower!

also everyone connected to the wonder world is having stomach problems but that's fine, here sophia take the anxiety sword

ren's character arc is now complete, he'll walk his own path, but one that can be parallel to the others

DAMN RYO'S WIFE FINALLY MAKES AN APPEARANCE, for like 5 seconds

is rintaro going to tell mei he's gay at the end of this lmao

improv is hard

older luna

awwwwwww

luna's only just about a character in this story she's having feelings about it

"everything's fine, you'll always be yourself, luna", BUT SHE'S NOT ANYTHING, SHE'S A CIPHER FOR ANOTHER CHARACTER

you've got to forgive yourself touma, the accident wasn't your fault,,,

oh you thought luna was going to stop being a plot device? WRONG!!!

to be clear, i don't necessarily have a problem with luna being a plot device, what i have a problem with is there are four female characters in this show, two are plot devices, one important and one not, one is a rider but her whole character turns into being obsessed with her brother, and the last one is the comic relief who the show keeps putting down by the way it frames her actions

anyway big hero shot of everyone i guess! the big tower approaches!!!

sophia is new kamen rider calibur, and i will cheer for her in the background of this big fight scene!!!

GO MY GREENSCREEN ARMY

does anyone remember what the grunts were called this season? i forgot there WERE grunts this season

storious do you need a throat lozenge

here comes miniboss number 1!!! ren and daishinji will do the obligatory stay behind for this

damn even the spirits of his fellow megid are calling storious out

sophia gets at least one hero moment in this 47 episode long show :D

miniboss 2!!! rintaro and ren have got this

anyway, the book of omniscience contains all knowledge, so according to storious, humanity has never had any free will, all is simply as destined

but any book can be rewritten

and the world is never as set in stone as it appears

miniboss 3!!! shindai siblings can take this one

or maybe no-one's got it

miniboss 4!!! touma and kento will do this one together, to keep with the 2-on-1 theme

we're riding a thin line between "people can always change their fate" and "touma is the specialest boy" here

anyway miniboss 1 is defeated through the power of desast!!!

OUGH OUCH THERE GOES DAISHINJI

HELL YEA MEI YOU CAN ALSO DO SOMETHING

and so as the last three minibosses have slightly new sparring partners, touma races to the top!!!

storious isn't done with his evil monologues just yet

everyone is the protagonist of their own story, and everyone can decide how their story ends

miniboss 2 down!!!! and ryo and daishinji,,, it seems,,, with it

likewise, miniboss 3 is destroyed with the help of rintaro, but it doesn't look like the shindai siblings are making it out of this tower,,,

storious trying to make himself seem like a full entire opposite to touma, and like it'd work better if he was interesting at any point before a couple episodes ago

well sorry you thought you had the divine gift to pluck completely new ideas from thin air dude but you've gotta understand that the entire world is connected and everything informs everything else and so all ideas have in fact come through many many other ideas and concepts first

anyway let's go power of reading!!!!!!

THEMES

let the final battle begin!!!

oop, planet's starting to go, but mei has a very important email to write

hold on hold on hit pause on that apocalypse

YEET

touma has fallen into a big hole in lego city!!!

and everyone else is STILL fighting this goddamn miniboss!

oh damn ren's dead, fuck

so did you ever hear the one about the dragon kid?

and thus yuri sacrifices himself for rintaro and kento

but hey the lady miniboss is dead now so that means the primary colour trio can save the world, which is good cause we're about to have all books be erased!!!

and so luna ceased to be, never to be a character after all

but she would usher in, one final power-up

that thing the more recent rider shows do where the hero gets a final final form which is their first form again

A NEW STORY IS BORN

oh i get it it's like the theme song

and so they killed him with the power of a complete toy collection

FUCK YEAH STORIOUS IS DEAD WOOOOOO

is this how the world ends?

it was always going to end

but maybe,,, the missing piece can come from an unexpected place

VIDEOS SENT IN BY FANS!!! JUST LIKE IN THAT VIRTUAL STAGEPLAY THING

IT ALL COMES BACK, BAY-BEEEEEE

ahem, i mean the enduring power of stories!!! and also of mei, who's the real hero here, actually

and so in the end, the world was remade, all the toys of this season shut off, and touma vanished

the fight may not quite be over yet,,,, but touma's last book did win an award!!!

and thus did the world learn the power of stories, and how they bring everyone together

so really nothing changed

but perhaps from the wonder world, touma will be able to write his own ending

oh hey he woke up all the books and stuff are back on, and everyone's back to life so everyone can have post series movies

AND HE'S BACK

and thus we can finally close the book on the tale of the worst road trip ever taken and its disastrous consequences

and i can close the book on the show that,,, i mean ultimately i think it succeeded a lot better than ghost so my compliments to takero fukuda on his improvement as head writer (though he actually didn't write any episodes past 43, the one where desast dies), but to be honest,,,,,, i really didn't care about most of it

i tried, i really tried, but the show just didn't grab me at all

BUT IM NOT DONE YET

one last piece of saber media remains in this part of my marathon!!! episode 48, the special final episode that's mostly an extended trailer for the next thing!!!

kamen rider does this sometimes

so, everyone gets a well-earned holiday after the 15 apocalypses

they'll still be around though, waiting for any post-series movies and specials to hit them

maybe there rintaro might find time to tell mei whatever he was going to tell her, because he ain't got time here!!!

hmmm a monster of a type ive never seen before, whatever could that mean what a mystery

ryoga is too awkward to do anything other than swordsman duels so we're going to do that

offscreen!!!

FINALLY rintaro is down for complete structural change!!!

one day they might let reika be a character again

anyway, happy times are interrupted by this geometric grasshopper!!!

oh hey there vice

and your uh,,, farting

also revi is here!!!

we've had the two-in-one kamen rider, now prepare for the one-in-two kamen rider!!!

basically everyone has inner demons and under the right circumstances they can be outer demons, and under really good circumstances they can join you as a kamen rider

our main man is ikki igarashi, the comedy demon is called vice, they're kamen riders revi and vice, a.k.a. revice, and we'll get back to them properly later

anyway, there's like a plot going on here

aw man, a trio of friends are going to be separated??? that's touma's alarm call!!!

aw MAN one of the kids got used to create a monster!!! welp, better stop that

friendship restored(?), now time to fight some kinda grasshopper guy

featuring revice obviously

oh also we have a helpful kamen rider fan on the scene to help identify them with his selfie stick

that megalodon looks very decade-y!!!

weird grasshopper guy: defeated!!!

unfortunately the grasshopper stamp ain't one of the main pieces of the next toyline

so many things are happening at once

and thus all's well that ends well!!!

so what was rintaro going to say?

dude you already found your family if you have something else to say take another year off and rephrase

im going to ignore the attempted implication that you're straight

wow democracy!

and thus everyone is off to do their own thing, but they'll certainly meet up as friends pretty often

as for what else they'll be up to, or what the hell these revice folks are about,,,, well that story is, as they say,,, one for another time

[greenplantlizard]

super hero senki!!!

it's one of them big kamen rider super sentai crossover movies!!!

but,, it DOESN'T have taisen in the title!!!!!

rejoice!!! (though z was ok, apart from their absolute and utter massacre of my boy)

anyway, let's celebrate 50 years of shotaro-ishinomori-derived TV works!!!

kamen rider saber's secret attic has unleashed the manga collection demon!!!

rip whoever those guys were

once again, i love how all the spin off saber media starts with people getting on touma's ass about not writing, BRO THE WORLD NEARLY ENDED LIKE 5 TIMES

we're getting pretty introspective over here,,, this is some of the most memorable touma has been

hey look it's kikai sentai zenkaiger, the one show in this movie i haven't seen yet!

it's fine these crossovers are always more rider than sentai joints, plus it's a fun preview :D

huh is that a crossover fic- oh goodbye

it's zyuran!!! if id seen zenkaiger id know him!!!

50 x 45? congrats on your 225th anniversary everyone!!!

and everyone from zenkaiger's been sent into saber i see, except zyuran,,, and zox

anyway the zenkaiger crew seems fun :D

they seem one of the goofier sentai, and i do enjoy the goofier sentai :D

anyway for those who haven't seen zenkaiger (me!!) thank zyuran for getting us up to speed!

hey hang on those aren't tojitendo,,, they're druidon!!! i know them!!!!!!

ZENKAI ZYURRRRRRAN

not just druidon either, there's those trilobite fuckers from kamen rider zero-one in there

and also MANGA ARTIST WITH SOME KIND OF POWERS, that seems important

a manga artist named,,, shotaro? ,,,hmmmmmmmmmm im sure it's a coincidence >:)

although a show about stories and a show about parallel worlds would be a better fit for doing some real meta shit than kamen rider zi-o was, as fun as those movies were

anyway so our villain is asmodeus, traitorous keeper of the s-tier forbidden books,,,, which happen to be novelisations of every rider and sentai series!!!

yet another villain from the sword of logos! i think making them was a mistake

it always tickles me when stories do meta stuff like this, but then the characters in one insist they're from "reality" :D

anyway little main character conversation!!

the zenkaigers finally figure out they're fictional

no no you're not fictional, you're from a different world which we write about as fiction!!! yeah keep telling yourself that sophia, your reality is fiction too

kids these days with their manga artistry

uh oh!!! it's a couple of monsters based on their opposite show: sentai megid and rider world!!!!!!

asmodeus WILL reduce everything to nothing through crossovers

what would one of these movies be without getting sent to the edo period set

the desert!!! that's a new one

this kinda reminds me of a sentai crossover movie, which is fun :DDD

HOLY FUCKING SHIT KAMEN RIDER ZI-O TO THE WEST??????????????

WHAT

it might be too early to call it, but this might also be the greatest movie ever made

oh hi there the imagin!!!

here come the assorted grunts!!!

ZENNNNNNKAISER

i literally love it when creative bullshit happens :DDD

back in the samurai movie,,, hey look it's the kyurangers including MY GIRL RAPTOR i know them!!!

also dekamaster is here, i guess he is a natural fit while still jarring enough with the aesthetic to stand out

ill admit to not being familiar with the specific story being reference here though

yeah the imagin don't exaaaactly fit the journey to the west roles, im glad they bring this up LMAO

hey there owner!!!!!!

the ip homogeny event horizon awaits, save yourselves!!!

zyuran has no time for literature

hang on,,, don't i know those two?

FUCK YEAH THEY GOT SHINKENGER AND KIRAMAGER IN THIS

i watched shinkenger before making this blog, but suffice to say i fucking LOVE it

and kiramager is a delight, so excellent to see both of them here

we have made it,,, to the west! unfortunately it's full of sentai megid and his misfit minions

i say misfit, they're actually specifically chosen as the best fits for this story

curses! not the shrill-voiced talking bird!!!

who could save us now,,,, except,,,,,,,,,,,,,, KAMEN RIDER ZI-O????

which means we get any heisei kamen rider suit cameos we want of course

it would appear that the super sentai franchise has been unleashed!!!

shotaro is saying things that may hunt at his true identity, but we haven't got time for that, there's more grunts showing up!!!

even though i didn't finish these shows too long ago, it still feels nostalgic to see them

OH HI THERE ARUTO KAMEN RIDER ZERO-ONE

he tends to get on very well with robots

awwww yeaaaaa, it's raptor and xiao time!!! let's go kyurangers fans!!

and we're all back in the big fight quarry!!! but where did shotaro the not at all mysterious go,,,?

it was a trap!!! if all the stories are merged together into one, then they can all be cancelled together!!!

but all the villains are also- I SAW BASEBALL MASK

ahem

i saw him

alright what villain costumes do they have this time

lot of grunts, ikadevil

shotaro has not found his own heroes, they're all by this saburo hatte guy

WUH OH

welp, there go all the shows, they're all erased from existence!

and hey the saber characters figure out they're fictional too!!!

more of a mindfuck when it happens to you huh

god's power huh? could this god be,,, shotaro last name still unrevealed but we totally know who it is???

but no time to worry about that, because it's all over,,,

THE END

something seems off here

but hey welcome to reality, it's reality where everything is fine and normal and greenscreen wait ignore that it's a happy ever after! see how look how happy it is! no one has to suffer!

,,, ignore the visual glitchign on shotaro ishinomori's biography, or the lack of furniture in this room,,, or

,,wait shotaro who???

hang on

I FUCKING KNEW IT

WHOA WHAT A TRANSITION

ah yes i mean when you think about it there can certainly be dark undertones under the superhero genre

that doesn't mean we should throw those stories out

but it does mean the door is open for someone to explore it

someone who's willing to write stories of heroes struggling with an inner darkness

heroes who's battle isn't chosen, but thrust upon them

ones characterised by an inner struggle

or by loss

or by having to protect those like them

or by being a kid finding a BIG FUCKING ROBOT

but some of those are beyond the scope of this movie

and so, we have shotaro ishinomori re-create the world of fiction of rider and sentai, so that this story will have a satisfying ending

i dunno if id say the show kamen rider saber does much with the whole being about stories thing, but DAMN this movie does

anyway now the villains from every show are free to do whatever the fuck!!!

or are they?

because i know what time in the movie it is

it's the time where everyone shows up for a giant final battle!!!!

starting of course with the originals!!!

so everyone give a big hand to KAMEN RIDER #1 AND AKARANGER!!!!!

one born from angst and kid-friendly horror, and the other born from goofy spy action, both would launch extremely long running franchises of shows, all represented now!!!

i mean for sentai it's just all the reds but I suppose we also have to have all the kamen riders here too and having every ranger would drown them out

and also zox is here hi zox!

i mean we need a full zenkaiger and saber (by approx saber episode 40, zenkaiger episode 20) roll call, don't we?

OH THAT'S VERY GOOD ROLLCALL MUSIC FROM THE ZENKAIGERS

very showa-inspired but also very high energy, i enjoy immensely

GO EVERYONE'S CATCHPHRASES WITH THE TRADITIONAL VERY OBVIOUSLY DIFFERENT VOICE ACTORS FILLING IN FOR EVERYONE WHO'S NOT HERE

why do gokai red, goggle red and battle japan all sound like they're 7 years old

if i listed all the cameos, or even all the ones im most excited to see, it would be literally the entire rest of the post :D

look in this case i don't mind having black and rx here at the same time, it's also just stories :D

HANG ON

AKIBARANGER SENTAI GEAR????

YOOOOOOOOOOOLO DEATH FLAG RUNNING JOKE REFERENCE

anyways, that's everyone, do it's time to fight asmodeus!!!

"you're just repeating similar ideas!!!" "you guys have jumped the shark!!!!!" LMAOOOOOOO

i like to think of it as an ongoing process of evolution, i mean no two series are really quite identical

anyways hit him

i mean, you COULD be the protagonist of a story, asmodeus, but in this one you're the- oh hi there revice

it's kamen rider revice!!! they're the next ones, and yes, there's two of them

HAPPY BIRTHDAY?

ahem,,, enough cameos!!!

alright you two, off you go to your own series

anyway all the cgi ships have been absorbed into asmodeus' ultimate cgi clusterfuck form!!!

it's a rider sentai movie it had to happen

summon every single sentai red vehicle!!!

do the kamen rider thingy!!!

debut a movie-exclusive toy!!! i mean obviously it was going to happen

RIP asmodeus

and thus the world is saved, and a new rider series coming soon sit your asses down in front of the television, children, buy our toys!!!

and hiroshi fujioka as kamen rider #1 gets to meet our teenage idealised recreation of shotaro ishinomori

this is,,, actually really sweet :')

nothing in history is really down to the One Guy, but i can relate to the desire to go back in time, find whoever created the things i like, and give them a thumbs up, say hi, y'know?

and even though super sentai is ended now, it just means it's up to us to decide what to do with it

was that a good movie? i have no fucking clue

but i LOVED it

having seen all the rider and sentai up to this point except zenkaiger, it was one of those works that feels like a reward for making it this far, a huge birthday celebration of these shows and the project ive spent about 5 years of my life now doing :D

i may be entering the final stretch of years now, but MAN it's been a fun ride all the way

[valtsv]

unfortunately i can never hate on a "power of friendship" narrative no matter how corny because the thing is it's literally real

[greenplantlizard]

saber 39 & movie release combo special!!!

re: spectre x blades those are definitely kanon clones, chloé was an entirely different person that danton also experimented on, they're played by different people and everything! so my bad on my confusion there

ANYWAY

a shorter post than i usually have, at least among ones incorporating episodes of the main show, but that's because this particular corner of saber is VERY special-heavy

technically i think the movie im going to immediately launch into the preparation for was released slightly later, but it fits better here so,,,

ALSO DISCLAIMER: i have not yet seen zenkaiger, the watching order i have chosen for the rider and sentai shows means that i always watch the rider/sentai crossover stuff without having seen the sentai side yet, so this (and the movie which is up next) is like a preview of that show for me

BUT BEFORE THAT, we've got a normal episode of saber to watch!!!

ok tassel, you can stay for now, but no more bonne lecture, you're on thin fucking ice

luna is back so that surely means more plot

and we're well on track for the series finale,,

anyways yuri needs to take a damn nap

isaac absolutely continuing the trend of saber villains insisting they're not owned ever

and now this is happening

by the power of friendship and momotaro, kento joined the party! given the shadow sword has apparently stopped giving him anxiety he's gonna be fine now

so although he didn't quite pick up the thunder sword before, he's espada again now!

daishinji seems fine

meanwhile the shindai siblings really love getting beaten up now they're not antagonists, but reika at least for everyone's books back!!!

"could it be that you want to fight alongside us?" "no."

anyway hi isaac, why on earth would you do any of this?!

sheer utter boredom!!!!!! honestly i kind of like that

welcome to the solomon zone

also a charybdis is here

"ren, everyone else is wrapping up their character arcs, hurry up already" "no, im committed to having mine end naturally"

isaac is committed to being The Most Evil lmao

anyway we have a powers of creation vs destruction thing going on here, i see

looks like xross saber has another variation!

you know what that means!! isaac is about to have his ass handed to him for the second episode in a row

now sit down and wait for us to be done with the movie

ryoga says "ant"

anyway, we can leave all that plot stuff until next time, saber's world is about to be linked to another in a whole different way!

SO!!!

this special episode of saber is accompanied by an episode of zenkaiger which is also a crossover, BUT ill cover that when i watch zenkaiger itself methinks, for now we're sticking on the saber side

i love how every special has mei being like "touma, did you work on your wip yet?" when in the main show at this point he's juggling the same apocalypse back and forth with the villains constantly, i think that'd give anyone writer's block

meanwhile, a portal has appear, carrying a very mech-like ship and a very comedic monster, with a very sentai-like gimmick!

this is orihime world, cause every zenkaiger monster is called a world,,, because they use the stored power of an entire universe to do their shenanigans

wild

she's come to do a multiverse colonialism, but standing against her is,,,,,,, wait that's not any gokaiger that i recognise!!!

he is a pirate though, his name is zox, and he's zenkaiger's 6th ranger!

he's got silly catchphrases but delivers them well, i am charmed :)

that'll teach you to write things on strange prayer slips

hi there ryoga and reika, the whole reason why im watching this here!

yeah, ya fucked up touma

,,,you underestimate how easy it is to find sentai monsters, they are very committed to their gimmick, it's why i love them :)

anyway, it's time to dance!!!

welp, it's pretty hard to fight an opponent who can write "i win" and then does

anyway, here's the story of orihime! remember this when i finally reach the zenkaiger side of the crossover

wait that's a good point, why HASN'T she literally written "i win" yet? i love it when episodes are smart! :D

yes, twokaizer has to dance every time he does the henshin

turns out orihime world is actually less powerful than she appears! it's all a matter of perspective

does that explain the other shit she was doing? ,,,,,,,,,uh,,, maybe??

i find it quite funny that the first time i see kento as espada in quite a long time is here :D

so, time for a team-up battle!!!

and her gear's gone too, ill have to wait until zenkaiger to understand the ramifications of that, methinks

i can't say this half on its own really gave me a burning desire to watch zenkaiger, but that's the consequence of keeping it mostly a saber episode with a monster and one character from the other show more than the actual zenkaiger elements

zox/twokaizer seems neat though

and thus ryoga and reika pursue zox, who's stolen their books... all the way into zenkaiger!! but that's a story for another time, we've got a whole movie to watch that can't wait!!!

[greenplantlizard]

saber x ghost & spectre x blades!!!

Part Saber x Ghost

we're in full movie/special season of saber right now, so here's the ghost crossover specials, which exist because the same writer helmed both!

we begin with the spooky egg cult of FAMOUS VILLAIN OF THE SPECTRE MOVIE DANTON

HOLY SHIT DANTON CULT???

good way to win me over, referencing the one bit of kamen rider ghost i actually liked (not counting kamen rider 1, which i also liked to be fair)

one day kanon will escape the situation

BONNE LECTUREEEEEEEEEEEEE, been a second since we heard that

anyway, one day there was a season about a kamen rider that returned to life that im afraid i didn't enjoy very much, and there's the season im currently watching, which is a season that i,,, am currently watching

so now, they will collide!

if a character who is a sister exists in either show, they must always think about their brother

if their brother is not there, the character must ask "where's my brother?"

also desast, desast is here

desast you're being too much of a creep, get pushed

mei would be the kind of woman to think it's entirely normal to want to kiss your female best friends and vehemently opposed anyway suggestion that this makes you gay

AND HE'S JAVERT

ahem, excuse me, i mean here's the ghost cast!!!

well, two of them

plastic object comparison!

looks like takeru knows where to find danton's raincoat cult

and they're after the same absolutely unhinged shit that danton was after! excellent :D

LMAO even years on, kamen rider ghost can't get original designs for villain suits, all evil commanders must be the same 2 or 3 ganma

desast proves completely incapable of taking even a single hint

desast is also reallllll normal about his condition,,,,,,

leave this to everyone's favourite character,,, JAVERT!!! he knows all about the human condition!

javert, you failed

anyways, takeru is in fact here!

and touma is as always here to help

OUGH

getting impaled and still attempting to help the lady impaling him is peak touma

aaaand he's fine in the next shot once she releases him! wow!

anyway we gotta kill whoever this bad guy is, so let's have a saber and ghost team up proper!

i do enjoy ghost's suit and henshin sounds :D

,,,don't think about the lore implications of takeru's temple having the ghost wonder ride book for generations, look at the shiny power-up!

i love all the faces on it in reference to ghost's 15 million forms

GO CATCHPHRASES

and whoever that guy was is now destroyed! or at least his ganma body, this is a guy from ghost, they're not dead unless you kill them 90 more times and even then they still will not die but will be shuffled into the back of the supporting cast somewhere

AHEM

my salt aside, that was a fun time, and the fun's only just begun!!! unless you forgot that danton has another 2 remaining followers,,,!

Part Spectre x Blades

we've seen the red(/orange) side, now on to the blue!!!

BONNnNNnNnE LECUTReeeeeeee,,,,

what's this? another crossover power-up lying around?! inconceivable!

how many of danton's followers does it take to hatch an egg?

obviously these two raincoat-wearing doofuses want to BE the ultimate life form

and they have a multitude of kanon clones with which to do it!

ah this one's wearing white, she must be the real one then

meanwhile we rejoin rintaro's journey to learn what food is

with all these clones wandering around (would they technically be chloés? man i dunno), it's of course kanon prime who finds the daitenkuu temple first

i mean that makes sense, the others don't know where it is

genuinely kanon prime character development!!! i love to see it :D

sisters is certainly one way to refer to "i was grown in a lab and she's one of my four surviving clones"

rintaro and mei listening to this recap of the spectre movie like "what your brother was what"

well, just mei, rintaro's backstory is so tragic he genuinely doesn't know which part of this is weird but he's trying his best

anyway, blades time!!!

i was gonna say that one of those ganma forms was original, but no, edith used it near the end of ghost, fuck you edith you're responsible for everything bad that's every happened

anyway forget that because KANON FINALLY GETS TO HE A RIDER!!!!!!

behold,,, kamen rider kanon spectre!!!!

im so happy for her :D

oh fuck rip 3 of the kanon clones

aaaand the fourth

welp

their deaths did give us an original-ish ganma-ish form at the very least

well,,, kanon's time in the spotlight was nice while it lasted

hi there makoto!

the villains are really set on deadnaming him

anyway here, blades, take this power-up book that was handed to makoto by some sort of narrator-looking gentleman!

should really call this spectres x blades, cause there's two here!

anyway blades is empowered by the story of spectre! it's real confusing and starts meandering an awful lot, but stick around after the end it's worth it

the spectre movie references even being us sin spectre, which is pretty cool :D

and the kanons/chloés aren't dead either! hooray!

and thus, rip the last of the raincoat trio, you tried hard, but trying to co-opt past evil plans just earns you rider kicks to the head

and thus makoto has even more sisters to be overprotective about

well, it's a happier ending than the alternative!

this closes out this fun little crossover! :D

though there is a post-credits cliffhanger,,,

we will see this guy again, but that's a little while down the line, and whether it connects to these specials at all is debatable

anyway, that's a story for another time,,,,,,

[greenplantlizard]

saber hyper battle dvd & 36-38!!!

LAST TIME: the power of determination put a dent in master logos' evil plans, but he still got a big evil power-up and intends to use it!!!

anyway, how's about time for a silly goofy dvd special?

im gonna warn y'all now, we're about to hit a very movie and special-heavy part of this show...

my goodness! a magazine that kids across japan can enjoy?! what could they possibly be referring to??

some kind of magazine that releases special dvds about various japanese tv superheroes among other features? never heard of it

"we all come from mothers" "no!!!"

and with everyone's unhinged ideas combined,,,

oh crap! not the duckling megid!

we're learning so much x-swordman lore today

yuri's such a nerd

LMAO the subtitles going "it's clobbering time"

see the thing about duckling megid is that he's a loser

an adorable loser, at least

maybe he can be a better help to the magazine as consultant duck!

that's an interesting interpretation of the parable of the ugly duckling

remember kids, being a loser is not a permanent state of the self

meanwhile storious is here!!! it's been a few episodes, so i like to believe he's been shouting at duck trying to get him to kill saber for the past 3 episodes worth of time

every charybdis megid is personalised

storious is the world's goopiest supervillain

hey references!!!

this battle has been deemed too pixelated for television

this is one of the less hinged hyper battle dvds and that's saying something :D

duck story is the true emotional climax of all of kamen rider saber, his struggles inside the flying skeleton nightmare party shop stomach of charybdis are the height of the work as a whole

rip duck

anyway let's have some kamen rider action why is he so large

HOLY TV-KUN, BATMAN!!!

he is now small

normally after watching something like this, one would make a comment about forgetting this ever happened

i am not such a person, i want to remember that all of this happened, every detail, forever, and i want all readers of this post to watch this special and burn every second into their memories

well, most of the seconds, you can skip the ending tv-kun ad

anyway, back to the main series!!!

everyone's swords are back and sophia's destiny is apparently averted without her actually having to choose to avert it! wow,,,

anyway so touma's the real big chosen one

and kento's feeling the first few glimmers of hope! so that's good

storious doing his best evil advisor impression

alright everyone bring it in for sophia's character arc there's no time to worry about her amirite there's plot with men in it! that's definitely more important!

worldwide lightning storm of EEEEEVIL

master logos wants to destroy the world because,,, well because he can basically

and now he's a new kamen rider!!! kamen rider solomon!

you know he's evil because his henshin sound is all spooky

and as befitting someone using a significant fraction of the book of omniscience,,,,,,, he's pretty damn strong

giant ominous cgi books are a recurring fixture of kamen rider saber

wait, master logos' name is isaac

huh, i never knew that

anyway he's announcing a worldwide battle royale!

if the shindai siblings hadn't turned on isaac here id be extremely surprised

meanwhile daishinji seems convinced we're on track for a final form power-up arc about now!

impeach isaac NOW

so, in the face of despair and the future's seeming inevitably, do you destroy, do you succumb, or will there be a secret third option?

also sabela and durendal made an uneasy alliance with the party!

yeah uh, turns out if touma wins he ceases to exist on earth, apparently, so that's a bummer

ryoga and reika refused to join the party

kento therapy attempt, failure

"people won't start fighting just because they were told to. humanity is not that stupid"

anyway we gotta stop kento killing himself! and also touma causing himself to cease to exist but touma naturally ain't sufficiently worried about the latter

desast urges ren to do something

well, he's gonna fight touma, and that's what he's going to do

at last! a breakthrough!

he's still got some character arc to go, but im glad he's progressed a little

oh hi bacht

i mean to be fair trying to recruit him into stopping the destruction of the world was a long shot

bacht is unamused by your tonally dissonant comedic antics

kento's big brawl is surely brewing,,,

ayyy the touma, rintaro, kento trio finally fighting together again at last

unfortunately they've got the whole power of god thing to deal with, and uh,,,, an entire section of tokyo has been reduced to ash

,,,,well.

there's kento's big sacrifice, but touma's not letting anyone else sacrifice themselves for others, just himself!

oh damn, bringing the swords of light and darkness together is a pretty big deal actually

flushed him down the turlet

he'll be back though

anyway, kento's internal struggle has gone up another gear,,,,,, but hasn't quite ended yet

something something hope from pandora's box something

damn isaac's back already?

aaand the world's still ending

we gotta get touma and kento to talk it out, meanwhile everyone else will go deal with the everything else

including those not in the main party!

one could call isaac's taste in music questionable, perhaps

this too is yaoi

everyone is here!!!

including bacht, who i honestly keep forgetting about whenever he's offscreen

kento needs a good long chat with his dad's spirit in the symbolism world

it is, genuinely, quite sweet :)

meanwhile touma gets in a good old blasting of bacht's ideology once more, looks like more and more death flags are popping up for our phoenix nihilist

never stop trying, the world might not be inevitably doomed after all

ill give saber this, it's presenting basically the themes of kamen rider ghost in a much more coherent manner, so as much as this series isn't really getting me invested, i appreciate the writer's growth :)

anyway looks like this is truly it for bacht! he's reached his thematic conclusion, and so we bid him adieu

RIP bacht

anyway wasn't the world ending or something?

with the power of spirit dad, let's have an all-saber rider sword throw!!! including espada, who's only been in the opening and end credits ever since kento got sent to the shadow realm

when the themes of the story are laid truly bare, then shall the final power-up be bestowed upon the main hero

and so witness the birth,,, of kamen rider xross saber!!!

man singlehandedly (ish) stopped the world from exploding in seconds

solomon's hitherto unseen power to summon giant metal guys

xross saber's power to blow up all those guys in seconds for cool factor

and thus the world is saved, by the power of friendship!!!!!!

but someone's taken falchion's sword,,,,,,

no time to worry about that though, because the second things aren't apocalyptic, specials can pounce on us!!!!!!

[greenplantlizard]

saber 33-35!!!

master logos is back at it again!!!

plus ren's gonna get the axe! ,,or the sword,,,, taken from him

everything is fine and losing the very important key is not a problem

yuri friendship token: obtained

im sure if i wasn't a lesbian id be excited by ryoga's shirtless training

meanwhile desast is still up to trying to train ren as his dark disciple

look it's not like desast has anyone else to talk to

oooooof wow i didn't know touma's trauma could get even worse!!!

DAMN that's a very sudden way to drop the sophia lore

not even any build up? just "yeah she's an artificial lifeform made to bridge the worlds by master logos by the way"

anyway kento continues to grapple with one of the most fucked up states of being for any kamen rider to be in

LMAO HI MASTER LOGOS

meanwhile, is it sabela fight time? it better be sabela fight time

apparently ren can still transform, so i guess sealing one of the hayate blades doesn't seal both of them

"my goal is to create a world of joy everyone to live in" "no it's not!!!"

i love the subs making master logos a little comically verbose

"garrulous fool"

damn it, he's not even lying, i saw it happen in the blu-ray extras in my last post!!!

anyway, now it's personal!

touma gets heated enough to cause indigestion in the power of omnipotence

touma would run headfirst into an ominous howling void to save his friends no questions asked

never be a main rider who primarily uses a sword they'll torture you beyond measure, that's my advice

anyway back to my favourite lady of this show :D

ren absolutely cannot accept that desast the miniboss man is a better fighter than him

OOP

RIP desast

rintaro to the rescue!!! we'll be fine we're still in the marketing phase of his new form

desast's fine

the amount of things ren is putting off processing could fill the arctic ocean

meanwhile kento you're getting so close, buddy

the book of ruin? WAIT A MINUTE I KNOW THAT NAME

ryo rejoined the party properly!!!

kento symbolically in the darkened city

we're getting close to a kamen rider zi-o like nexus point for the future,,,

oooooh that greenscreen shot wasn't quite lined up

anyway, it's motherfucking bacht, everyone, from the movie, he's back

if you didn't see the movie, uh,,,, he's a damn bad guy who'd really love it if nothing was anything anymore and wants to send everything back to the void and also it's really hard to kill him

meanwhile, what if we pretended to do the fight from earlier to open the luna portal again

well it sorta worked if you ignore the part where nothing happened

maybe they need a proper fight,,, like with bacht!!!

the sword of logos guild kinda reminds me of bionicle, where there have been several generations of these heroes and a bunch of the ones from the past you hear about have something horrible happen to them or got corrupted by something

did we mention that bacht/kamen rider falchion can negate special abilities? because i don't think we did in the movie

oh hey that really did open a portal to luna! unfortunately events have not progressed enough for that to work

so it turns out bacht is from yuri's generation, but then his family got killed by a different traitor in the guild, and he went fully nihilist void-loving evil

the sword of logos guild sure does seem to solve problems they themselves created a lot huh

"we're both blue, we're both strong, let's fight!" - durendal probably

KAIJI MASSHOU SAI KAIJI

ryoga learns master logos did the exact thing that he didn't want him to do

rintaro i think you forgot something important- oops

i think it's important to mention again that bacht is pronounced like "bahato" which sounds an awful lot like "bad"

like this guy is name of bad, he is bad guy, they called him bad

hi kento! now this room has double the despair!

ah FUCK they got yuri

^me when i realise i now have a reason to read a fanfic that will surely take up all of my time if i start

ahem, uh, RIP

anyway i think we're in for another portal!!!

anyway, luna is back, this surely means big plot incoming imminently!!!

oh kento stuck in the back

no luna, being a plot device is your function im afraid, and you must remain there

now ryoga's the shindai sibling with doubts

oh yes, the big plot's gonna kick into gear now,,,

LMAO master logos teleporting his furniture with him is hilarious

touma may be emotionally in tatters but when has that ever stopped a kamen rider from going into battle,,?

KAIJI MASSHOU SAI KAIJI

aaaaaand there goes another sword

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand another couple, sorry reika and ryoga

ren has most the plot

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand there goes calibur, sorry kento

we're literally just down to touma now!!!

hey touma would you like your movie power-up?

that doesn't sound like bacht is dead yet but we did get him!

just in time for MASTER LOGOS SUCKER PUNCH!!

we're making the big plot happen here and now bay-bee, enough episodes of stalling it out, luna's going to the sky right now

oh hey look it's sophia's famous big sacrifice attempt that's fated to cause everything to end eventually

ah crap it's the big giant cgi plot book!

anyway, with enough force of will and his friendship with luna, touma will,,,, oh man those shots of him look so silly ahem,, he'll do it anyway!

looks like all the endings might not be bad ones after all

i love how whenever a villain's plans have clearly hit a problem they're just instantly like "yeah actually this is fine for me and actually i planned for it and im not owned"

and also everyone gets their swords back!!! the ones that are sealed are even unsealed!!!

,,,it's not quite kento's turn to be espada though

master logos did get his own toy though,,, oh and a new sword! but he's not in the fighting mood today

your plot function is done, luna, you can go back to not existing now

[greenplantlizard]

saber sword of logos saga!!!

in the five minutes in my busy schedule this time of year,,, it's more saber!

this time,,, the secret blu-ray special confirming how master logos is behind everything forever! probably

first of all, let's remind ourselves of the lore

5 humans: 3 evil, 1 annoying, 1 created the kamen riders and was succeeded several generations down the line by a supervillain

so not the most successful backpacking trip all told

anyways, 15-odd years ago- WAIT KENZAN USED TO BE A WOMAN? WE WERE ROBBED

master logos' evil smile

having visions of the future does not turn out well for people, they keep being visited by futures of torment and ruin

philosophy lessons with the previous riders

and he wasn't alone, until,,,,,, he was

what an inconvenient time to get a vision of your friend killing you damn what the fuck

anyway so remember calibur loves his son kento very much and everyone will be fine and ok

ryo thinks he should have a kid at some point, i wonder if he ever did >:)

hey take this photo! i promise it won't be stained by complicated emotional resonance later!

this man is kinda relatable, i too am plagued by visions of the world falling to ruin no matter what happens

"hey master logos i specifically saw you laughing evilly and blowing up the planet care to explain that?" "you mean i actually do get to do that for real?!"

"no no no you don't understand im going to save the world by destroying it before it's destroyed anyway! then we can make a new one, i promise!"

he's falling for it!

next part of the plan, assemble the books and also a small child

ahhhh this adds some extra weight to kento/calibur vs saber in the part of the story ive reached, the one almost chosen to save the world vs the true chosen one

"don't even try to understand why this kid is like that, trust me she's just real weird"

and that's how we got to the originally presented backstory of the season, with megid everywhere, the greenscreen bubbles and the rest of it

rip espada and kenzan (NOOO), taken to us by desast of all people

this is the part where all the characters from the backstory die

aaaaaaand touma doesn't remember any of that for the next 15 years

also previous saber becomes calibur and instantly gets hit by the future visions

im gonna say it, i don't think the future visions are helping these people protect the world lmao

i mean,,,,, that's the point obviously, but i find it very funny just how unhelpful they are :D

we have given this man all of the trauma

also daishinji and ryo, they get like,,,, some of the trauma

most of the trauma?

some of the trauma

meanwhile master logos' plans sorta worked out, so he goes about watching things evilly and looking for a pair of twins to hire

15 years later, it's the gang we're familiar with!!! except touma, he ain't there yet

then saber episode 1 happens, i remember saber episode 1! it's got all the janky greenscreen and that scene where touma tells a story to a group of kids which is something he's literally never been seen doing since!

DROP EVERYTHING REIKA IS HERE

i love getting master logos reaction shots on the various episodes, it's very funny to me

hey look it's desast! ,,,im afraid at the point ive reached in the show i still don't give a single shit about desast, but i appreciate that he has a meaningful role here

then saber got the power of arthur "saber has obtained the the power of arthur" yes, thank you

then reika starts to become more prominent, so here's a look at her actually doing stuff

someone needs to give master logos a bowl of popcorn

and there goes the previous calibur,,,

at this point we're kind of at the point where all the new scenes are master logos going "reika, that thing we saw you do in the show, go do it"

some kind of impostor within our midst

anyway master logos is bored and wants to blow up the world because no-one's ever done that before

i mean no-one's been enough of a collector to get all the toys, and also a child, explode the world and become omnipotent,,,,,,,,,,,,,, because no-one's enough of a supervillain

huh, so sophia's actually a being created to be the next luna by master logos,,,,,,

kamen rider plots get INSANE LMAO

let's check up on kento in the shadow realm

he's having horrible visions!!!

kento is literally the most zi-o a saber rider has ever been

me when pandora's box type symbolism

anyway the whole primitive dragon thing is going on, which means tassel is about to get shot with the Book Beam, which is very satisfying to me because i don't like him

now master logos can go back to monologuing to himself, his favourite hobby!

the real message of this miniseries is that knowing about the future is a terrible, terrible burden and it's cruel to anyone to have them do it

meanwhile ren and desast are having a little bit of fun bonking each other in the face

the thing about being corrupted a little bit is you get to have silly fun times with your corruptor

desast is totally different to the main three megid, he's a rubber suit monster for one

therapy with ren and desast

ok i now give something of a shit about desast, he seems neat :)

meanwhile, reika backstory! ,,,, y'know i wish more characters could be people's sisters without having their whole character revolve around their brother, im gonna say it

anyway, kento is having wonderful underground tunnel time where he broods

turns out the future we're in is different to the one he thought it was! (and im getting a little bit of future vision myself as per usual when i watch these blu-ray specials, but that's by the by)

power of friendship, obviously

master logos here with the summing up

so we've learned that in the near future, kento might team up with touma maybe, and master logos is soon about to get his hands on the big bad plot book, which he's gonna use to destroy the world!

get hyped everyone!!!

[greenplantlizard]

saber 28-32!!!

big plot threads are a-tangling,,,

meanwhile touma has reaffirmed the power of friendship with his new form!

anyway, we've got master logos to take down, and our heroes don't even know!!!

well, except kento, who knows far too much

so the sword of shadows gives you anxiety?

no it can't possibly be master logos, we need to introduce four more characters!

ren is real normal and fine about kento coming back and everything is absolutely ok and nothing is wrong

and touma's still gotta be writing books while doing this??????

touma backstory recap!!!

you might have guessed this is essentially a clip show, so let's put all the exposition into one convenient place!!!

are storious and zuooos still doing this? there's gonna be four more possibly antagonistic guys soon they're gonna be even less relevant!

new rider reika's brother coming soon!!!

meawhile, exactly what rintaro warned ren about starts happening

it's desast!!! im gonna be honest man, i completely forgot about you

welp, there goes at least half of the sword of gales

we've gotta have at least one show off of elemental dragon this episode

i keep wanting to call elemental dragon emotional dragon, i feel like considering the story those two names should be swapped

ren you are taking the wrong lessons from this

touma's list of people to save really does just keep getting longer huh

rintaro's really coming around!!!

oh your heart has decided, huh?

but he's got to properly tender his resignation first of course

touma is more overjoyed to hear rintaro is joining the party than anyone else

of course that's if he survives to get there

so touma's going in with yuri to prevent anything awful from happening!

the book that does WHAT

master logos is completely done hiding at this point, he's just going absolutely full evil supervillain, just complete cartoon evil speech about taking over the world

at the very least the teased four divine sages will not be appearing in this series, they are in fact probably dead

here comes the new rider, ryoga aka kamen rider durendal, with the power of,,,, OCEAN HISTORY!!

ahem

AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHA

HA

apologies, ocean history is serious business and it will send you to the ballroom dimension

also he can fuck with space more generally so that's no good

rintaro's fucked let's see how touma does

it turns out elemental dragon has very high evasion

holds your gay love interest hostage to increase the drama

the ANGSTTTTT, the DRAMAAAAAAAAA

the GAYYYYYYYYYYYYY

fuck you, yoinks your shit

anyway, where yaoi failed, it's yuri's turn!!!

well shit

"everyone, please be well" UHHH

he stopped doing the teleporting thing, everyone get him!!!

hey look new play features goodbye!

and so rintaro and sophia did in fact survive to join the party,,, just about!!!

the gang's almost all back together in fact, just ren and kento left

poor rintaro, he's so polite

have a make-up eclair, kid

anyway, mei's in dire trouble!!!

it turns out that durendal can control time!

plus master logos is like 1/10th omnipotent, so that's not good

so, our missions are clear, ryo will get ren, sophia will negotiate with kento, and touma and rintaro need to get a very important key from mei and fight a megid!

there appears to be a cat out here

human jewellery? that's cheating!

rintaro is kinda generally having a Bad Time, this is not a good day to be rintaro

yeah tassel's been missing all this batch,,,

meanwhile desast is still following ren around for fun, he's not very good at convincing him to join the dark side fully but he's enjoying it

aw mei,,,

rintaro is being held back by the evil force of impostor syndrome!

which isn't good when zuooos is pulling new abilities out of his ass out here

oh boy,,, they gave rintaro the sword of water as a self-fulfilling prophecy, for he would become the wettest guy, just absolutely sopping

rintaro might be more mentally unwell than touma and that's a real achievement

so storious and master logos have regular meetings now huh?

reika you don't need your brother, you can be an awesome sword lady for whatever reason you want

rintaro's insecurities are boiling over-

ZUOOOS' SICK VICTORY FLIP LMAO WHAT

is this what finally makes him at all interesting to me? his impromptu backflips?

rintaro has left the party

touma's not quite at breaking point yet, this is still a rintaro storyline

touma is the loyalest boyfriend

the only way to solve this is for these two men to swing their swords at each other to prove their close bond!

they're not the gayest guys in all kamen rider, but they're among the gayest in this kamen rider

rintaro learned violence as a coping mechanism, hooray!

ok that's not actually what the show's going for, he learned to persevere in life and not give up just because he feels like he failed, he learned to meet problems head-on and always strive to do right by others to the best of his ability

im glad the show does see mei as an important character sometimes, even if she's not allowed to Do very much, and many of her scenes have her reduced to one-note comic relief

you can tell they're gonna do better this time because they walk in in choreographed slow motion

nothing can stop them, not even mei's random suicidal urges

,,,except for the cat megid just re-fusing with mei

,,,wait they can do that?

we need the power of believing in ourselves even harderer!

THIS TIME they did it for real!

unfortunately storious got the very important key and zuooos is extra extra pissed but hey, mei can go back to her usual flat comedy shenanigans so wasn't that worth it?

mei do you want this to become a polycule, because im down for it

meanwhile kento's having doubts that he actually saw every future

wowee friendship drawings!

EW MASTER LOGOS WHY

and so, time to close out this arc!

storious loves the evil advisor schtick

summons my jiggling cgi arrow

we're under attack!

time to take on all the villains! (except master logos himself)

it's yuri and touma vs reika and ryoga, and ryo and rintaro vs an upgraded zuooos!

storious is also there, he's just better at infiltrating so he hasn't been caught up in a fight yet

oooooh reika's wavering a little bit

huh so that's what the sword of time does,,,,, so basically teleportation but even cooler-looking

just absolutely yeeted out of the base

KAIJI MASSHOU SAI KAIJI KAIJI MASSHOU SAI KAIJI KAIJI MASSHOU SAI KAIJI

welp, buster is down, hey mei would you like part of the book of omniscience?

i swear ive seen this room in a previous rider season now i think about it

anyway sophia's gearing up for a big heroic sacrifice out here,,,

but rintaro's be damned if he's letting someone do that on his watch

meanwhile touma has unlocked the power of time-vision(?)

this has truly become the rintaro arc, which like, im here for it it's just not where i thought the conclusion to this leg of the story (to some degree at least) would go

anyway durendal is very predictable, and that pattern can be exploited!

rintaro at last feels ready to follow through for what he's fighting for

the book of omniscience literally loves it when you believe in yourself, it will give you an arctic power-up

it's shiro jishi kamen for the modern era, but less utterly terrifying

anyway see ya durendal

meanwhile blades' new form comes with a practical blizzard!!

and also cgi wings

it is pretty cool tbh

the thing i can consistently praise about this part of saber is the fight scenes tend to be pretty damn cool :D

rip zuooos, you lived longer than legeiel, and really weren't any more interesting

but at the very least you did hold some significance for the character you were rivals with, so unlike legeiel, defeating you does actually mean something

like, i don't care as much as i probably should, but like, it means something

reika's DEFINITELY questioning,,,

and so the northern base is safe! for now,,,

but storious has yet another weird book!!!

doesn't he always?

TO BE CONTINUED

[greenplantlizard]

saber 23-27!!!

and we're BACK!!!

our favourite kamen riders from kamen rider saber specifically are having a bad time

BonnE LECTUREEeeEeEEeEeeEEEe

now yuri's while thing is done, let's get back to that whole traitor plot

maybe everyone can undo megid transformations

what if we just went directly over reika's head

meanwhile organisation team rocket xiii are planning to infiltratrate the southern base

everything's about different evil books for them

hey how come the southern branch has so many swordsmen?

daishinji's hall pass has already been revoked

double heist episode

zooous' wonderful day out on the town

legeiel, you're trying to heed with the main character? bro you're not nearly important or interesting enough for that get back in your lane

hehe ryo's pretty cool actually

one day mei will be allowed to do something without a man swooping in and taking credit at the last second

damn zuooos is kinda blue like his rival and legeiel wears red like his rival? that's kinda gay guys im just saying

IMMEDIATELY triggers the alarm

storious has an interesting idea of the word infiltrate

LMAO he runs straight into the boss

first people,,,?

WAIT STORIOUS' HEAD TASSEL IS HAIR? I THOUGHT HE WAS WEARING A TIE ON HIS HEAD FOR THE LAST 22 EPISODES I'M A FOOL

HANG ON THAT'S THE KINDA CHAMBER FROM THE END OF THE MOVIE

anyways welcome to a trap

touma can't believe there's yet another type of evil book mcguffin already

this one makes big evil arms

touma i don't think you're supposed to read that

welp, looks like we're in for a berserker form

bone crunching sfx

legeiel, consider yourself a jobber

this is a less than ideal situation, im gonna say

Bonne Lecture...

who the heck was that mysterious guy anyway,,,, wait only master logos can get into the library, and storious just met with him before suddenly getting in there,,,, don't tell me,,,,,,,,,,,,,

oh you'll leave the book with touma for the time being will you master logos, wow that's weird that's almost like you set things up so it'd fall into his hands for some sinister purpose, but im sure that's crazy talk,,,

wow this book is real ominous

anyway, this is perfect fuel to advance the touma's a traitor angle,,, unfortunately for reika ryo at least isn't entirely buying it

oh you picked the wrong tactic for this guy

ryo's kid is pretty perceptive

ok so storious didn't have like, a proper plan for the forbidden book, he just wanted to make himself or something under his control powerful with it

did someone order a saber vs buster duel?

and now that extremely cool-looking formality is concluded, ryo rejoins the party!!!

anyway time for a mysterious smoke to steal everyone's books!

ahh so reika is the one causing all the mysterious mist

rintaro and ren still ain't quite ready to come witg

rintaro's in too deep, and ren's conflicted

the sword of logos is getting increasingly culty out here,,,

every berserker form will activate itself at some point, or else the rider just wouldn't use it

eating everyone's books!

so primitive dragon is in fact the diary of a teenager is what im gathering "the world doesn't understand me and my struggle"

CALIBUR??????

NEW CALIBUR JUST DROPPED

the plot thickens

BONNE LECTUREEE~

hmmm so this looks bad, this looks pretty damn bad is what this looks like

luckily this vision of horror and betrayal isn't actually happening, i can tell from the color grading

but it certainly could, and that's ominous!

things are getting into real plot heavy territory, folks!!!

do not question the mighty and correct sword of logos, peon

anyway, sophia imprisoned by the southern branch confirmed!!!

oh shit? reika's going to transform this episode!!! FINALLY a woman rider in this series i don't care that she's evil

perhaps we can write a fix-it fic for this berserker form

OH YEAH HERE WE GO

HERE WE FUCKING GO

KAMEN RIDER SABELA

fuck them up queen

it is also funny that she transforms using a bug encyclopedia though

rintaro's conflicted feelings are going to burst him a blood vessel if he keeps on like this, poor guy

QUEEN SHIT, QUEEN SHIT

she can be my problematic fave LMAO

kamen rider feelings talk

you two are making wonderful progress and it's so nice to see, now is there anything either of you would like to tell each other, anything vis a vis your feelings about each other, or about men in general, or,,,

get fucking purged, idiot

TASSEL IN THE MAIN EPISODE??

ah crap

and now everyone's in here!!!

sent him to the metaphor world

anyway, calibur's detransformed now, and LOOK WHO GOT OUT OF THE SHADOW REALM

that's right, kento's back, and he's got some interesting ideas about saving the world

oh so he LITERALLY went to the shadow realm, like it's LITERALLY called the shadow realm

but yeah what the hell happened to him in there

,,,nothing good it looks like

hey what's with the movie trailer booming bass

tassel's name is VICTOR???

so, a long time ago, a woman opened the gate to the wonder world to five humans, one of which was the original master logos, another was tassel, and another three of which became storious, zuooos and legeiel and started this entire mess, so honestly there were only negative consequences to this entire endeavour

oh so the current master logos is just a supervillain then, ok

welp

tassel got shot with the book beam, rip tassel

hmmmmmmm kento seems to be dancing around some dire portents right now

YESS SHE'S BACK

she has been defeated this is misogyny against me specifically i will be writing to lawyer-

anyway kento's seen the bad ending already and it sucks

damn seeing literally every bad future? that's maybe the worst it's happened to like,,, anybody im sorry about that man

well fuck, one rider can't transform and it's the guy who really likes swords too,,,

hits a water pipe for maximum cinema

w e l p

AAAAAAAND RIGHT INTO THE SUPER UPBEAT ENDING THEME

with the forbidden art of edited reprints, legeiel has been given a new form, which surely means he's not long for this world

,,,well he was the most boring one, i can't say ill miss him

,,,don't they need all the sacred swords to do the world destroying thing anyway? Like does kento need to seal all of them? or is it like the first time they needed "all" the swords and suddenly ren counts twice

anyway it's time to do something about that berserker form, it's hyperbolic time chamber time!!!

meanwhile legeiel has a new form

time for hyperbolic time therapy!!!

touma is literally always exposing himself to Situations where he will be in the maximum amount of pain

wait if it's been an hour outside how long has he been in there???

anyway we learned something at least, so it's time for a showdown with legeiel!!!

primitive dragon just needs a hug

a story ending doesn't mean the world does, it just means it's stopped being told

anyway primitive dragon joined the plastic book collection as elemental dragon!!!

ohhhh it's like a handshake, i get it

not sure i really fuck with the actual design of the suit but i like the idea behind it

legeiel, do you too not remember the wonder of the greenscreen world? the way the grass you were superimposed on top of didn't feel beneath your feet?

anyway we can kill him now

RIP legeiel, he was a villain that was in this show, and now he is not

it unfortunately turns out tassel is fine though

anyway kento is still convinced we haven't changed the future, but that's a problem for NEXT TIME!!!

[greenplantlizard]

saber 17-22!!!

LAST TIME: there's a traitor in the sword of logos, and everyone has been immediately convinced to turn on their new bestie touma because of it, except for this new guy who is a sword

it's definitely not him though, so who is it?

to find out, we're going to need a few more BONNE LECTUREEE

touma's life sure became a shambles real quick

meanwhile up at megid mansion, the plan to make everyone hallucinate an alternate dimension sometimes is going excellently

legeiel has always historically made schemes that definitely always work

it's cold out, time to turn a lady into a yeti

man,,, espada's still in the opening credits,,,

hell, calibur's still there LMAO

mysterious new guy name of yuri is definitely not here to rob you

my guy you are raising so many questions

ah, hmm, sore point

yuri hates popular comic book x swordsman, he will never be x swordsman

meanwhile at conflicted feelings central,,, y'know what yeah i buy ren's and rintaro's reactions to all this tbh

yuri's amazing powers of wardrobe change, would that he would land in an era that would let him wear skirts

yuri discovers boba, i love watching modern shows purely too see if i can figure out what will seem a product of its time a decade or two from now LMAO

hey there legeiel

confirmed!!! organisation iii over here were just manipulating calibur the whole time

y'know, saikou has a sort of x theme in his design, and his book says gold or silver,,,,,,,,, he wouldn't happen to know anyone named noël by any chance?

i feel like turning a miss yuki into a snow-themed monster was little on the the nose

so the villains implant books into people -> turn them into monsters that will eventually turn into Evil Plot Books -> ??? -> Big Plot Book -> profit

anyway other magic book has told touma where to go so let's go there

she's just too damn cold, help us saikou, for the third time!!!

observe, before he burns up our cgi budget, saikou's human form!!!

well, he's still burning up our cgi budget by virtue of being a translucent shadow that looks like it was made of smeared grey grease, but y'know

anyway he's strong but we gotta stop him killing a lady

🫴🫳🫱🫸☝️BONNE LECTUREEEEE🤡🤡🤡

apparently they hadn't discovered the power of friendship 1000 years ago

aw, legeiel thinks he's a big boy villain with his disguised electric keyboard set to play harpsichord and organ samples simultaneously, how sweet

im afraid the villains here have not inspired menace in me, they've mainly reminded me of pathetic rich college bros who flaunt how smart they are and how much they work out, and have a lot of trouble getting women to come to their parties

hey so yuri who actually are you though

here comes the lore!!!

see there's a light sword and a dark sword and bringing them together is a Big Deal, and yuri fused himself into the light sword so ge could protect it, and now he's like this and enjoys spouting Dire Pronouncements while learning about boba

hey there rintaro and daishinji

yuri, you're not really helping

well this makes the situation more complicated,,,

also bonus slash vs saikou, for anyone who wanted to see that

touma keeps getting frozen today

saikou is a real get out of jail free card for how ruthless he can be

go, inspiring speech!!!

success!!! yuri has learned it's better if people are alive!!!

i see them trying to save more and more cgi budget with saikou's shadow lmao

and that's what we call dramatic timing!!!

you ever wanted to dual-weild a guy?

yuri joins the party! and also he could have solved this immediately and this was all one misunderstanding,,,,,,,, sigh, that's a little less interesting

anyway now to solve the other misunderstanding!!!

BONNE LECTUREEEEEE AAA FUCK TWO TASSELS, IS THIS A NIGHTMARE?

anyway the sword of logos is absolutely fucked

if they put all the swords and books in the same place,,,, well they'd be able to rewrite all of reality, which uh,,, yeah that seems like something to stop

meanwhile things at the southern branch are getting increasingly shady

meanwhile organisation xiii minus x have a new megid out, how thrilling

with sufficient imagination, you too can get forcibly turned into a model castle monster

this lady is the shadiest person on earth

luna lore

well of course touma's destined for power,,, he's the protagonist!!!

good GRIEF yuri, please discuss before erasing people's memories

daishinji having reasonable doubts moments

greetings, child

despite not liking it, yuri is back to reading x swordsman, how interesting,,,

,,,and he's so fascinated that he didn't even notice a fight breaking how, god dammit dude but i hope you enjoyed

,,,did he just absorb it?

oh hey there storious, you're yet another guy who gets cancelled out by saikou, rendering you somehow even less threatening

saikou vs slash rematch!

oh hey, turns out the frat bro book club didn't take sophia after all, what a surprise!!!

well that went well for everyone

"i want to save everyone who's suffering because of books" is a truly incredible line

anyway, slash isn't leaving without duelling saber at least once

results,,,, inconclusive

BONNE LECTUREEEEEE

our shady lady's called reika? i must have missed it

hey guys, turns out touma was right after all!how y'all doing with that

reika isn't here for any of this truth business

meanwhile the megid crew are finally up on what's going on,,, or at least as up as we are

hey ren, wanna be manipulated???

the answer to that is very much yes

yuri's only sorta feeling it today

ren's losing it, he's beyond reason for now

oh hey desast is here! it's been a minute

anyway ren takes a second to look at who he's fighting alongside, he's not a fan

oh he's REALLY losing it

meanwhile, touma's figured out what the monster's up to!

mei sadly gets no sympathy :(

touma's a guy with a lot of pain about stuff

everyone's pretty injured, but we did it!!!

also turns out yuri can heal people to add to his frankly comical list of abilities, and he's enough of an x-swordsman fan now to become one!

that was a wet bonne lecture, i didn't like that one

anyway yuri's ready to properly join the party!!!

daishinji is no. 1 swords fan, and a conflicted individual

LORE

but no time to worry about that too deeply, the megid are back

ok so how are the frat boys going to get those swords off the kamen riders?

yippeeee touma's increasing weight of trauma!!!

things really picking up a simmer at the south pole

megidception

you toss enough megid at someone, they turn into a whirlpool

touma is on his knees pleading begging

sad to see when you have seen so much loss that you begin to see it as inevitable

time for another duel vs slash!!!

what if we made a man out of nerdiness and regret,,,, and also he turns into a rocker guy sometimes, character of all time

daishinji says touma, stop spamming your new toys

touma says "AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH"

YOOOOO THEY SET HIS SWORD ON FIRE FOR REAL

anyway takeaway is that touma is not chill but you should be chill with him

daishinji is OUTTA here, he said yeah no touma probably is the protagonist after all

meanwhile, yuri has finally got his upgrade

ill give this arc something over the previous, they're actually pacing out the character development better now they're not constantly introducing new people and things, funny that

why is this monster making baby noises

oh this thing is FUCKED UP

hey whaddya know, saber can separate people from megid, just like the ttfc direct theater fortold

anyway now he's been eaten, so leave this to saikou, and his new marketable form!!!

so marketable that a lot of promotional material has this as practically his base form

W-W-W-WHAT COLOR

i do enjoy them acknowledging comic books as literature :D

now his arm is made of color

nailed it.

tassel is this lecture bonne or not?

anyway things are getting less stable in the sword of logos

charybdis megid still ain't done

sucks being a high profile twin sometimes

ryo is having his feelings

ren might be succumbing to the darkness

and that megid is still about

more importantly, buster has come for his duel with saber!!!

touma has had it up to here with his friends attacking him

welp there goes one of his books

touma does not know what critically injured means, and if he did he wouldn't care

oop, there he goesssssss

meanwhile in the horror plot

touma is some of the least ok anyone's ever been, it's like they made a guy out of pure saviour complex

you ever wanted to fight a monster while it's weeping and giggling at you?

bad few days to be the sword of logos all round

yuri enjoys feeling bodily pain for the first time in over a millennium

well this is a non ideal situation

rintaro your resolve is wavering

touma's resolve however, remains conceringly stronger than his bones

nevertheless, success!!!

saikou gets leg

yuri, why do you keep doing that thing with the memories,,,

sword of logos really out here wondering

meanwhile the villains swear they're not owned with their infinite charybdis generation machine

those two have rediscovered their friends despite not remembering any of this

remember, anyone can be a hero! it's what he read in comic books

until next time!!!

[greenplantlizard]

saber ttfc direct theater!!!

this is something a little different, that im putting here because i have no idea where to put it and also because i forgot to watch it a little earlier where it'd probably make more sense

im not entirely sure of the idea behind this web series, but i think they're bringing the kinds of things you'd usually see in the smaller stage shows (which im not covering in this marathon currently) to the screen, helped a long by a truckload of greenscreen!!!

there's also one of these for revice, not sure ill cover it purely because i currently can't

find it, but i could find this!!

yuuup, that's greenscreens

the size of the stage makes it look like everyone's on a single plane, like a mobile game cutscene kinda

oh, apologies, it's a bluescreen

welcome to bluescreen world, kiriko nakazaki aka special guest star erina nakazaki!!!

hey, women have pretty high energy, stageshow suit guy!!!

never fear, kamen rider saber is here!!!

grasshopper megid is back again

oh no, not the children in the bubbles!

i understand the intent with the bluescreen going on, however the effect is,,,,,,, well it's not great-looking in practice

hooray! you did it!!!

!!!to did uoy!yarooh

wuh-oh, the entire weird-looking bluescreen world was a timeloop!!!

welp, you tried your best, but it all turned out exactly the same way again

ok what if we run off stage?

and,,, back onto stage but the screen is different!

maybe this plastic book could have some relation to the plot

sometimes you've got to let go of the narrative of your own life and be yourself

this is,,, actually a better use of the ant and grasshopper parable than the episodes that originally had those two megids

never give up! trust in the videos clearly recorded and sent in by kids who are fans of the show!

looks directly into the camera "and thank you, audience!"

i feel like im more inclined to be nicer to these because im probably never gonna see one of these types of stageplays in person, but i will say these can never capture the vibe of a true live event

anyway, we did it!!! but grasshopper megid got away, so the show must go on,,,

blades is here now!!!

grasshopper megid you're looking more autumnal than earlier

hey look, it's vlogger arisa aka special guest naomi majima!!!

she's a saber fan, and maybe the only megid fan on earth!!! or at least the only one on her earth

anyways, back to the choreography

hmmm that seems not especially ideal

not another ant megid!!! grasshopper megid is up to his shitty tricks again

never fear, kamen rider blades is here!!! (hence why i should have watched these slightly earlier but ah well, but then turning arisa into a megid,,,,,, eh it's just a supplementary digital stageplay, i should really just relax)

grasshopper megid is the worst

take this important dream pendant!

aw man, not all the fan videos!!! or production staff kids, i don't actually know which, i assume it's the former though? if only because that's kinda cute

ah yes, the special power to turn humans into megid, that definitely won't come up again in any saber episodes ive started watching during the making of this post

anyway grasshopper megid sucks real bad, and now saber and blades have no choice but to fight each other for his amusement

loudly shouting your plans a mere 2 feet from your enemy works every time

harem??????????????

whaddya know, the pendant was important!

the power of directly stating your goals flows through you!

man if only he could do that in the main show, that'd save him a little grief in some episodes that'll be in the next post

and now the suit actors have some more fun, which is really what we're all here for

grasshopper megid is dead!!! or is he

find out in part 3!!!

in this episode, the special guest is YOU, the viewers

and also some familiar faces from kamen rider past

this time, the show will take place on a stage containing a bluescreen projecting a stage!!!

everyone remember to shout a greeting at your screens

aw man, the shocker grunt costumes are back!!! and so is grasshopper megid, who's joined shocker offscreen

so his mind-controlled girlfriend was freed and now he's joined the cartoon nazis? many such cases

shocker grunts! seize a member of the audience!

i appreciate their attempts to do a live show type of vibe with this one, even though i am definitely sitting at home watching this and am definitely not in fact, there

turns him into a shocker grunt

shocker training!!! aka the suit actors have much more fun

anyway, kamen rider saber is here once again!!!

everyone, shout instructions at the kamen rider saber on your screen right now!!!

you can turn anyone back from being a shocker grunt by clapping your hands

LMAO i just noticed grasshopper megid's new baseball bat has a shocker combatman design painted on it, that's funny

anyway, another combatman has been infused with the wandering soul of kamen rider's most evil monster... shadow moon!!!

...look some stuff did happen to him in black rx that im not going to get into and everyone has ignored it ever since, he's uncomplicatedly evil here, ok?

his feet aren't making the right noises

aw man, he's turned everything into the bisexual lighting mesa!

on one level, there isn't much too this one, but there is one part of my love of shadow moon that just enjoys seeing him in his stageshow suit moving around on my screen, y'know?

anyway, the cheers of the audience have summed kamen rider #1!!! it wouldn't be a stageshow series without a past hero showing up to get audience cheers, would it?

and so, let's let the suit actors play one last time!!!!!!

bye shadow moon, again

LMAO the single shocker combatman exploding is really funny

anyway, thank YOU, audience, for summoning kamen rider #1 with your magical powers of participation

so yeah!!! not a lot to these ones, but they're pretty fun if you like watching stage combat or janky bluescreens

as for me, ill be back on the main show very soon

[greenplantlizard]

saber 11-13, swordsmen chronicles 3, 14-15, swordsmen chronicles 4 & 16!!!

LAST TIME: calibur, who's not who we thought he was, finally assembled a big bad book, and there's a lady from the sword of logos southern branch who's acting real shady about, looks like things are building up to the conclusion of this arc of the story!!!

also tassel is in important meetings with someone, but anyway, BONNE LECTUREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

kento's favourite activity is brooding on rooftops

kento corruption arc??? 👀👀👀

"all six swordsmen" implying this show will not introduce any more new riders,,, which i do not believe, there's a whole southern branch already introduced already

anyway enough angst, there's more random megid about!!!

VIKey

damn that's actually a cool and creepy-lookint way to kill someone, just turning them into a flat red silhouette that flops over like that

if you ever need a random fight to break out, desast is your man!

the boys are being immensely mean to each other, this is the perfect time for kento to be manipulated,,,,,,,

kento that is a HELL of a conclusion to jump to my guy

he's uhhhh, not thinking straight right now that's for sure

welp, time for a rider battle

touma just needs some time out

kento is learning some very distressing news right now he's,,, uh,,, he's fine, trust

ah shit, it's time for an evil power-up!!!

intimidates you with 5 different jingle sounds

meanwhile sophia just got consumed by the mist, which im sure is fine

anyway it's a different episode to the last one which means we need to see another new saber form or bandai starves

fuck you, drops my animal instruments on you

anyway this is a big plan to trick everyone into using their powers to make big light pillars open, which is surely not good

anyway rintaro takes a HELL of a hit for kento, he's,,, definitely Not ok

tassel you're getting increasingly menacing

hey did you know BONNE LECTUREEE and also he's tassel

welp the identity of his mysterious visitor will remain mysterious another day

anyway things up at the north pole are,,, tense

so lighting up all six pillar doors will fuse the worlds and also something something universal truth, which is probably the big book that contains everything ever

time to walk entirely knowingly into that trap!!!

at the very least the villains are out trying to stop anyone doubling up, so they did think that through

i do wonder how their plan is going to work with rintaro critically injured and kento depressed and only out to fight calibur, however

also i swear rintaro is recovering in an amaglamation of past kamen rider cafe sets

so they tried this before, 15 years ago huh!!!

never fear, rintaro is here!!!

hey touma remember your childhood best friend who's memories you've blocked?

"snack on the chopper" - slash

hey hang on, kenzan's done two!

WAIT THAT COUNTS AS LIGHTING??? then why did they need six, could they not have had one guy do it six times????

hey touma remember where your thing about promises came from?

YOU ARE OVER

#kentoisoverparty

anyway everyone is receiving mortal wounds recently and it's honestly so concerning

well uh,,, rip kento? fuck

real world tassel and mysterious guy???

i love them not having tassel give closing narration to give more of a sense of weight but then we cut IMMEDIATELY to the super upbeat ending theme LMAO welcome back super sentai

and now,,, things look dire!!! tassel doesn't even think this lecture is bonne, to my relief

meanwhile touma is remembering so much

just one door left before the villains presumably win!!!

unfortunately this is a situation that may require tactics

so they do in fact require kento for the last one??? why did ren go twice then?

time to take on calibur!!!

hey also kento is going to get obliterated from existence by the influence of darkness, which sounds like a problem

WELP

kento is having timely Big Feelings and im so happy for him despite only feeling like i sorta know these people

by the power of your friends believing in you, your new books can evolve!!!

and thus, our new saber form of the episode, and to be fair, one that feels pretty significant this time

dragonic knight does look cool

OHHHH the cloaked figure is the one from avalon, i can't believe i didn't make the connection before now

WE DID IT,,,, sorta

and kento is,,, still dying

awww man is touma gonna have to face up to not keeping a promise?

and thus kento brings a second dramatic death into class

i mean he didn't actually die the first time so he could do it twice

he doesn't seem to have actually died this time either, but he certainly doesn't seem well

BONNEE LECTUREEEEE WELCOME TO EPISODE 13.5

today is kamen rider espada's story!!!

is this gonna be 11 minutes of kento screaming in pain in a purple void

nope!!! flashbacks

during the events of episode 13, kento was gradually dying of purple

gradually he realises the consequences of his actions

did someone ask for some clipshow???

"his novel lost memory contains scenes exactly like those that took place 15 years ago in an event he doesn't remember" - yeah i wonder what happened to him

kento and brooding on rooftops, name a more iconic duo

awwwww right in the family

ah the old send someone off for water and duck out while they're busy trick

and that's how kento showed up before being sent to the shadow realm!!!

tassel is inconsolable

so kento's been sent to the shadow realm, calibur stays winning despite losing, and storious seems pretty happy,,,

why do i get the sense it's actually storious pulling the strings here

desast is always just fucking around

and calibur can regenerate from his sword! fuck!

touma is taking this very well,,,,

everyone take kento's old plastic books for symbolism!!!

and now,,, for the big battle!!!

a first arc ending with villains attempting to gain ultimate power from a big floating golden Thingy generated by all the current toys?? this seems a little familiar

let's head it for symbolism!!! (plus i believe technically a new saber form? i think? im losing track

legeiel is so full from legendary beasts

ryo is holding some understandable frustrations

wuh-oh, the big book is opening!!!

everyone will lose if they use books they've never used before right now!!!

here comes the fiction!!!

desast was not invited to the climactic showdown

hope calibur has fun inside the ultimate truth of the universe

meanwhile rintaro is ready for a big hero moment

in summary, he has cannons, and boy are they effective!!!

KENTO BLAST

and for his next trick,,, he's a lion!!!

tassel is certainly excited to watch touma do this

time travel???

anyway only one can leave the giant book, and they've got to learn something along the way,,,

damn all this for the CONTENTS PAGE of the big book of literally everything

but hey if you collect all the pages, then you become god and can remake the world in your evil image!!! hooray!!!

the revelation that everything is already written and free will is an illusion is something that would drive people to become scary and purple i understand

touma's certainly not handling it well

but the power of believing in your friends, and not giving up will see you through!!!

the sword of logos was much worse at friendship 15 years ago

meanwhile operation smash the pillars and trust that touma will leave in time!!!

confirmed, the sword of logos was much worse at friendship back in the day

and now the remaining old guard have to deal with the cycle of violence they created

also yeah turns out luna's pretty important

anyway our current calibur thinks the sword of logos has some dark secrets,,, big if true,,,,,,,,

rintaro's pretty darn good at this

saber now deems it time to bring out dragonic knight

this is the point in battle where just kinda anything happens and it's actually awesome

RIP the jaou dragon book

at least calibur can buy now admit where he went wrong

so now there's possibly another traitor in the guild, and touma has to find them!!!

aaaaaand rip calibur

damn desast basically just snuck in, and he's free now soooo i guess he can just leave? doesn't seem like a lot of people can do that

and of course touma spells out the real tragedy, that calibur and espada were really searching for the same answers all along,,,,

aaaaaand the main megid trio are outta here!!!

touma's definitely going to get out of there, right?

yeah there he is he's fine

and there's a mysterious woman still here,,,,,

so arc 1 may have ended here, but things aren't over yet!!!

so, what else was going on during all that? cast your eyes to the final swordsman chronicles special for that!!!

B O N N E L E C T U R E

welcome to the blades special

so touma just won big time and it's really so good for him

but rintaro finally has time to mourn kento's loss

mei, your attempts are well-intentioned but perhaps misjudged

awww it's the instant camera from the last special!!!

now we get to learn why rintaro is like this

there's also that one time zooous told rintaro he killed his master, rintaro took this very badly, as you would

anyway damn no wonder he was completely not ok after that fight

awwww and it's kento's final selfie

processing grief, and processing yourself can be complicated, but it's always better when there's a shoulder to lean on whenever you want it

and now one final episode for this post, with the shape of things to come!!!

BONNE LECTUREEEEEE *spits*

the world is saved, the story is over!!! just kidding, mysterious cloaked guy is here to say it isn't

anyway legeiel and the others' plans are ruined

their current plans anyway, they have more

and mysterious woman wants the light sword that was made alongside calibur's dark sword

oh yeah, sophia's still missing,,,

anyways, new year's cleaning!!!

even more toys are coming!!!

hmmmmm, the wonder world is a little more visible

yoooo it's mei's mysterious editor!!!

so how about that whole traitor thing then,,,

what is up with that book

touma now has more promises to torture himself over!!!

aw man sophia's been captured,,, for like several episodes!!!

is it by the megid though? i dunno if i trust this lady and her insinuations against main character touma

welp it worked on everyone else, the northern branch and southern branch have been merged, and the southern branch wants touma's shit!!!

there's definitely a chain of betrayal, but where is it really anchored?

a h fuck

touma's definitely been altered by power, just not quite in the way his fellow swordsmen think he has

the others think he's going to bring great harm to them and the world, actually he's going to bring more harm into himself than anything

the cloaked figure is here!!! to stop kenzan doing something he'll regret

but who is he??? he's kamen rider saikou, the rider that literally IS a sword

i love kamen rider for shit like this :D

damn ren's almost going full villain here, everyone else is more restrained

anyway so saikou is a guy called yuri, and im sure we'll learn in time what his significance is

meanwhile legeiel just turned mei's editor into a yeti

oops!

TO BE CONTINUED

[greenplantlizard]

saber phoenix swordsman and the book of ruin!!!

thanks to covid, we got to see a rare site, a kamen rider movie paired down to the length that sentai usually gets!!!

so!!! let's get to it

22 MINUTES??? we have to hurry!

this movie will include evil sky portal and an evil kamen rider

eyyy touma as a mentor for kids, that's something we haven't really seen since episode 1!!!

anyways there's a bad guy who picked draconic sorcerer as his class option and has now opened the damn bad sky portal to eat the wonder world or something

his name is bacht, which tassel pronounces as "bad", he's unleashed the book of ruin, and he's a bad guy who wants to destroy the world because,,,,,,,, it's something to do? i dunno we only have 22 minutes

NOT THE CGI SKY HOLES!!!,

kamen riders assemble!!! everyone say your catchphrases for the benefit of new viewers!

anyway so bacht is kamen rider falchion, who is orange

i do really like the falchion suit, it's very cool :D

i do also love when a bunch of modern riders transform together and it's just a bunch of noises for a few seconds

anyway the time for plot is over 6 minutes in, now is the time for battle!!!

which doesn't bode well for my ability to provide commentary, this might be a very short post

excellent question, why are you doing this

well you see power is the root of all conflict, everything is pain, and we should all crawl back into the womb of the void

"yeah, ive gotta say no to that!" - buster

ok well that's the ideological conflict answered by every hero, 9 minutes in, so,,, more fighting to be done i guess!

i mean they're not particularly secret right now, they're projected in the damn sky

honestly i think bacht is a potentially interested idea, at least as a counterpoint to everyone else, but unfortunately he's trapped in a very short runtime meaning that he and saber just make a bunch of statements back and forth and do a big fight

anyway so he's the phoenix swordsman because he immediately resurrects if you kill him

which is not ideal

but never give up!!! if someone, somewhere says "never give up", touma will find the resolve to carry on along with a new form!!!

wait what

that feels like the kind of comeback we see in almost all these movies paired down to its simplest form, in a way that robs it, ironically for the introduction of emotional dragon, of a lot of emotional weight

like??? our guy is losing, he says he'll never give up, he's winning now

a lot of stories in this franchise ive loved do distill down to that, but like,,,, that moment was Just that, literally just those beats about that fast

like id say it's a consequence of only having 22 minutes to work with, but there's several sentai movies of similar runtime that do this better

heck, most of the 10 episodes of saber itself ive seen so far do this better and this show is still yet to really capture my emotional investment much at all

ANYWAY

point is, they did it!!! yippee!!!

bacht swears he'll be back, but we'll see how easy it is to get out of the damn bad sky hole

everything is back to normal

and that's all!!! aside from the honestly very fun end credits, i enjoy the riders being little bugs hanging out on a big book :)

oh and of course the post credits sequence, which is very mysterious,,,

despite how down i was on the climax, i wouldn't say like "this is bad and sucks forever", i think watching this is a perfectly fine time for 22 minutes, it's just not really much of anything? id recommend this to people who wanna see all of saber, or every rider movie, or big fans of the color orange and/or cgi fire, but i think for any criteria someone would look for in a rider or general toku movie/short movie, i could probably find a better fit,,,