inadvertent lie in my writing from twenty-four hours ago. yesterday was NOT our last full day in the city. because it rained. and delta saw fit to cancel our flight a full thirteen hours before it took off. i suppose they couldn't possibly know that the rain would mostly clear by 1 in the afternoon (still six hours before our flight) and that the sunshine would come out in a glorious way to reflect off all the puddles in soho. but, ah well. we got bonus time in a place we love. and tomorrow we'll try again to get home.
101 spring street tour--the building is so gorgeous, even before you set foot inside. the gray-painted cast iron facade just gleams. the windows are huge, pristine. and, having visited the spaces before, we could tell how carefully the renovations had been performed. our guide was good. smart, approachable. essentially, we went to each floor and had time to walk around, then we could approach her with questions. no lecturing. no over interpretation. such a good experience. i don't get tired of judd, no matter how many times i see his work or read his words or visit his live/work spaces. his art and ideas are endlessly satisfying to me. and i love that his two home cities--new york and marfa--also feel so much like home cities to me. anyway, anyway. as always. judd = rad.
with the rest of the day unexpectedly before us, we took in some bonus sound art at lucy cooley gallery. for what it's worth, i thought the show was much more clever and engaging than the exhibition at MoMA. the curation was thoughtful and i liked the mix of materials and concepts and sounds. lovely that we got to see it.
and then dinner. meatballs. wine. arugula salad with apples.
and then walking after dinner. the brooklyn bridge at sunset. the clots of tourists don't stop it from being magnificent. especially as the clouds pinken behind the skyline. it is always glorious. even in the heat. even in the freezing cold. even when you nearly get run down by a cyclist. even always. as usual, i was asked to take someone's picture. i like to think of all the pictures on that bridge that are taken for strangers, by strangers. it's a place where you want the memory to include whomever you're with, i suppose. and you have to get someone else (someone passing by, someone with a vaguely patient look on their face or a look of wonder similar to your own) to capture an image of the entirety of your moment. like that's possible. but of course it is. and no, it never will be.
as we left the judd building, i took out our camera to take a picture of the facade. and a little warning popped up on my screen.
"no memory card inserted"
here we were. given this extra day. in a place we loved. and i couldn't use my good camera to capture it. the iphone sufficed. it felt casual to slip it out of my pocket. to not juggle between a quick snap on my phone and a more studied series of shots with the camera. the pictures we took for the rest of the day were offhand. the places we visited almost all known quantities. as we sat on the subway home a few hours later, there was that flicker of normalcy. like we wouldn't be getting up in four hours to catch a bus to the airport.
sometimes my love of this place feels out of proportion. it's too much. there was a lot about the city that weighed upon me in different ways. and yet, i can't help but yearn for it. and i know (i know) that my heart and mind simply miss the sense of independence that the city fostered within me. not that i'm less independent now. but when you develop such a powerful sense of who you are and who you have the potential to be, and when that sense is intertwined with a certain place and time...you can't help but feel the persistent shadow of memory. sometimes good, sometimes bad, but persistent.
the streets are quiet and cool.
the alarm goes off at 3:45 a.m.