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@griefnextdoor
#𝐺𝑅𝐼𝐸𝐹𝑁𝐸𝑋𝑇𝐷𝑂𝑂𝑅! a private & selective hunter sup.ernatural original character, with verses in fandoms such as the va.mpire diari.es, [ 𝚁𝙴𝚅𝙰𝙼𝙿𝙴𝙳 𝙼𝙰𝚈 𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟸 ]. loved by yolanda, 21, she/her. disco available to mutuals.
𝙶𝙾𝙾𝙶𝙻𝙴 𝚂𝙻𝙸𝙳𝙴𝚂. 𝙿𝙸𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝙱𝙾𝙰𝚁𝙳. 𝙿𝙻𝙰𝚈𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃.
‘ so, you’ve compiled all this research by yourself? ’ he smiled at her, feeling genuinely proud for how far she’d come, but on the outside, dean would naturally tease her for it . ‘ i can’t tell if i should be proud of you or me — for being such a stellar fuckin’ coach . ’ / @griefnextdoor
it makes her smile, to see the layer of pride in dean’s features. it wasn’t a sight you saw very often, soldier boy having inherited his dad’s impossibly high standards, but beyond its rarity, it made lana feel like she was worth something. worth the trouble, worth the time and energy she’d seen him invest in her, without ever really knowing if it’d spark the results he hoped. it felt great, to not have let him, the one person who’d always believed in her along this hunting journey, down. brunette easily follows in his playful, teasing stride, ❛ you’ve never been one to shy away from giving your manly ego a boost, so i say you take half the credit — it’s not like it wouldn’t be due. ❜
❛ honestly, what else is new. ❜ lana rhetorically and self-deprecatingly asks, meaning it like a quip, a jazz-hands attempt at distracting whatever concern dean held out for her as he climbed down the stairs to her spot sitting by her improvised, modest fireplace — but she knew it was gonna take something a lot more convincing than that to throw one of her longest and most intuitive friends off his trail. and, right now, she didn’t have much pretend everything’s okay juice in her left. hazel hues remain locked on the rising and falling motions of the fire’s flame, before gathering the courage and strength to turn her head to tend at his adorably sleepy disposition, ❛ but i’m okay, dean ( @tobeblamed ), you really don’t have to be on guard duty for me — i’ve always been a mess, you’re just getting to see more of it now that you’re living here with me, i guess. ❜
“ i don’t know. i guess i just . . . got tired of it , y’know ? ” the hunting , constantly looking over my shoulder for something lurking just outside of my reach ── it was exhausting. it also isn’t the whole truth , but it’s the best lie i can think of that isn’t too out there. i can spin this ; i can work with this. oversimplification of the truth has never failed me before ── i highly doubt it would now. “ dean know you’re here ? ” ( @griefnextdoor / SC. )
a frown immediately crowns her features, as lana doesn’t believe that for a second. sure, she didn’t hold sam to such an unreasonably high standard to assume he didn’t get burnt out from the pain and the disappointment implicit in this job like all the rest of them from time to time, but the brunette would rather die than resign herself to accept sam as the kind of guy that stays down when he’s been kicked to the ground. he had enough fire and will in him to get up and dust his knees off for the greater good at least a million times, and it pained his best friend to see him sell himself so short. and it certainly wasn’t something she could just sit idly by and watch without so much as speaking her mind about it. ❛ no, actually, i don’t know. i assume you mean you’re tired of feeling like you go from one lost battle to another without any real pay-off in return, but you? tired of saving people, of trying to make the world a better place than you found it? i could never see that happening, and i personally don’t ever want to. ❜ hazel eyes are certain in their gaze, dead-set on their target as her wrist flicks the tequila shot down her throat in one go. ❛ as for dean, no, he doesn’t know i’m here, but last time i checked, he wasn’t exactly my keeper — y’just trying to change the subject or is there a reason why that particularly worries you? ❜
𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨…. 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬? 𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬?? … 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 → accepting.
@griefnextdoor : “yeah, you’re funny. you’re also still a pain in my ass.”
“you say that like you’ve ever thought i was anything else.” there’s a slight pout on the detectives lips as she looked over towards lana, the words (while true) still came with a face that said they might have hurt her. they hadn’t, far from it in fact, but she did it nonetheless. “what would you do if i wasn’t around, huh? to give you some great advice when you need it?” she put the questions to her friend, hands coming to rest on her own hips. “you’d be lost without me. you can admit it.”
a scoffed, amused chuckle leaves the hunter’s lips, as she could only be left to surrender at her partner’s overwhelmingly strong argument. ❛ fair enough. ❜ as much as she’d come to enjoy erin’s comaraderie and her unwavering sense of justice and loyalty, she’d also been difficult to skirt around in order to take care of monster business. granted things had gotten increasingly better ever since she was made aware of the things that go bump in the night and where her sneakiness came from, but whenever they didn’t see eye to eye on something? boy, was she a terrible headache. just another thing they had in common next to devoting their life to protect innocent people. ❛ i wouldn’t say lost, more like . . . inconveniently unacquainted. but yeah, i guess that works too. bet you could say the same thing about me and my diplomatic interrogation skills, wouldn’t you? ❜
ofplanetsloved, 𝗋𝗎𝖻𝗒.
❝ none taken, ❞ ruby bites back. holy water and devil’s traps can break her bones but WORDS could never hurt her (unless they were in Latin). ❝ you know ‘black eyes’ is DEROGATORY though, right? calling the wrong demon that might get you a one-way-ticket downstairs. ❞ but ruby was strong enough to handle it. she had to be.
❝ don’t ask me what’s wrong if you don’t want to fucking hear it, alright? ❞ she crossed her arms. ❝ that’s why i didn’t ask you if you were okay. because i don’t care. ❞
she wouldn’t admit it, not unless it suited her plans, but it was fun to argue with lana. lana was wittier than dean, and easier to rile up than sam. a fun hobby to keep her busy until the apocalypse comes.
brunette fights the urge to search the sky for flying pigs or falling balls of fire, ‘cause the world must be ending if a demon was schooling her on properly sensitive language. ❛ and you know killing people left and right isn’t very polite, either, right? or did they leave that out of hell’s guide on good manners? ❜ lana was as least a prideful human as you’d find walking the earth, but even she had a limit on the hypocritical bullshit she could take. and of course ruby would be the one to find it, even at her best efforts at playing nice. hands go up in surrender at her rude comment, ❛ i never said i didn’t wanna hear it, i’m just offering an assessment on it you don’t particularly like to hear, which is your issue, not mine. but i guess it was partially my fault for assuming you were capable of taking the feedback and putting it into a perspective larger than your hissy fit, my bad — i’ll try to remember self-reflection isn’t amongst your skill set next time, ‘kay? as for my emotional status, i’m pretty great, thanks for indirectly asking. ❜
lindscys, 𝖾𝗋𝗂𝗇.
erin’s shoulders tensed as she listened to lana, knowing full well that nothing that was described in that way was going to end well. individuals taking the law into their own hands, even for reasons that she couldn’t know, that they wouldn’t allow her to know, was always a risky endeavour. “protect and serve extends to you too, lana.” the detective assured the other, but knew that it was likely a wasted effort. lana seemed to determine to handle whatever it was that she wouldn’t let erin near, and it was looking more and more like she was just going to have to live with that. “i don’t want to be drawing a chalk outline around your body at a crime scene.” she stated, looking towards the other with a sincere look on her face, despite the caricature she’d opted to use to illustrate her point. “if something were to happen to you ––”
her morally righteous comment gets a small smile outta her, as it was honorable — looking at the world through the lense of your principles, no matter what. and erin should do it, for as long as her job and life circumstances allowed her to do it — sadly, lana wasn’t so lucky to get to see the world in black and white. it was all in different shades of GREY, and depending on just how light or dark said shade was, she was faced with having to make a brand new decision weighing the factors at play in each new situation. NO REGULATORY PROCEDURE SHE COULD RESORT TO INSTEAD OF HER OWN JUDGMENT. ❛ no, it doesn’t. i’ll protect myself, and you have no responsibility to serve or help me, so don’t worry, okay? it’ll take much more than a human trafficking case to put me in a chalk outline and keep me from ordering pineapple on your pizza when you’re not looking. ❜ brunette jokes, hoping to alleviate some of her worries by showcasing her own confidence in her ability to take down a nest of vampire’s endless blood supply scheme, ❛ i just need you to cover for me for a couple hours, say i’m calling in the central office to update agent hernandez on our suspect list and asking for orders on what our next move should be. y’think you could do that? ❜
tobeblamed, 𝖽𝖾𝖺𝗇.
dean watched the bottle get yanked from his hand as she took initiative . it was another one of those instances where she surprised him with her determinism . it seemed that no matter what he tried to argue against, nothing stopped lana collins from completing something she had already in mind . ‘ geez— bossy much? ’ he teased and huffed in amusement as he turned around— not with the intention to comply but to leave rather .
instead, he had accidentally given lana the opportunity to act fast and force him to endure some unwanted treatment . he felt fine ; there was no need for— ‘ ow—! ’ he exclaimed, surprising himself upon realizing how much the wound actually hurt . lips pressed together tightly into a straight line, shutting himself up as a palm reached for the nearest surface to balance his own weight as he leaned forward . lowering his head in defeat, he shut his eyes briefly as he exhaled through his nose .
hazel hues playfully roll to the back of her head at his girl-like scream, a slightly amused smile tugging uncontrollably at her lips ( as it usually did in the older winchester’s company ) — who knew experienced hunters could be such babies when things didn’t go their way. ❛ the worst is over now, i’ll go get the cicatrizing cream and you’re all set — won’t even leave a scar. ❜ there was no question or place for doubt in that affirmation, so brunette sets off to her bathroom’s medicine cabinet, searching to satisfy her curiosity as she rummages through the shelves to find what she was looking for, ❛ what’s with the macho attitude, anyway? is there a new fast and furious movie coming out and i missed the memo or something? ❜ got it, lana thinks as she grabs the tube and walks back over to her slouching mentor, warming the white cream on her fingers before applying it to the scratches surrounding the wound.
merveiilles, 𝗌𝖺𝗆.
𝓢am stood up from where he sat at the main map-table, closing his laptop’s screen in the process– he was searching for sightings and any abnormal activity around the country that they could investigate. But at the moment, it was a sort fo stand still, at least for the day. “Coffee should help. I’ll get a new pot on for you.” He said, starting to head toward the kitchen, taking a few more lingering steps as he continued to talk with Lana. “And nah, all nighters are horrid as you get older. Take advantage of them when you’re in your teens or early twenties.” He laughed lightly. “I’m glad to see that you’re okay though.”
it was heartwarming — sam’s steadfast disposition to take care of those around him. no matter what he was doing or what he had going on in his own head, you could always count on him to drop everything, and run to relief whoever needed it. it was a slippery slope, considering he needed to take care of himself, too, but there was a graceful nobility in it — one lana felt lucky to be in the receiving end of. even if not deserving. a soft grin curls upon her lips as she replies, ❛ thanks. ❜ bunny-eared flip-flops follow him to the kitchen, taking a seat on one of the isle stools, and allowing herself to get caught up in the rare, ordinary, domestic bliss for a second, ❛ yeah, my lower back thinks that’s a great piece of advice you just gave me there. it’s just, hard, coming to terms with the fact you’re not in the shape you used to be when there’s still so much left to do, y’know? specially now that abaddon is here and i know she’s the one who called the hit on my parents. ❜ lana mindlessly explains, at the danger of getting lost in her own head and her obsessive thirst for revenge, the very revenge that had served as motivating fuel for most of her hunting career — but sam’s grounding pressence brings her back, hazel hues focusing on his kind features as she assures, ❛ a couple intensive hunting nights won’t be the end of me, though, i promise — gonna have to do a lot worse than that to get rid of my stubborn ass. ❜
unbearablyindifferent, 𝗌𝖺𝗋𝖺𝗁.
Over by the window looking out over the (admittedly tiny) parking lot belonging to Sarah’s Spot, Sarah was busying herself with her own cleaning— sponge in one hand and a spray bottle in the other. “… Yeah,” she finally replied after what was definitely a minute of silence, “I’d agree with that. Things are just—- good now.” She turned slowly towards Lana after that, eyes wide like she’d heard someone else commenting on how good things were. “… Holy shit, Lana. Things are good now.” Blink, blink. “What the fuck?” She closed the distance between herself and the counter in five big steps, slamming her hands loudly down on the edge of the counter that her friend hadn’t gotten to yet. She was shocked, not a fucking asshole. “Things? Being good? Did you know that could happen?”
brunette mirrored her friend’s posture as she turned to face her, something resemblant to an epiphany lighting up her sweet features — and lana couldn’t deny she was very curious to find out just what it was and how she’d triggered it. and it was as simple as it was uplifting. a bright, amused grin quickly streched across her lips, reaching her eyes as she joined sarah in her joyful, self-accomplished sentiment, ❛ yeah, it is pretty amazing, huh? specially considering everything we’ve been through. and i guess i hoped it could, but i’m not sure i ever believed it would actually happen — always felt more like a dream, endgame destination to me. apparently, sometimes, dreams do come true if you’re patient enough. like you with this amazing self-owned business. ❜
𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐤 - 𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 → accepting.
@griefnextdoor : ❛ if you don’t hear from me in like five minutes , i’m inside the duvet cover . ❜
erin paused, in something of disbelief at what she was hearing from the other –– although, even she knew better, she shouldn’t have been shocked that lana might struggle with such a task. “do you need help?” she asked, but even as the words left her mouth she realised how much of a loaded question it was. “you know you can just turn the duvet cover inside out, and then put it on without having to go diving for corners?”
❛ of course i know that, but where’s the fun in that? this way, i get the fully-functioning adult equivalent to the my dog ate my homework excuse, and i don’t have to go into the coroner’s office for at least a couple more hours. ❜ lana playfully confessed, arms unwillingly fighting the fabric, warming up to the idea of becoming a human burrito. ❛ as for help, it depends — how much are you dreading going into work today? ❜
sunsymbols, 𝗌𝖺𝗆.
“It’s a two person job; you need to be in the cemetery first in order for me to walk in on ya’.” Sam offered her a small smile, raising his hands in peace. The stray leaves crackled underneath his feet as he moved, the green hues of spring baked to a faded yellow from the constant sunshine and dry summer heat. It had been over a month since he’d cleared out the narrow forest pathway; there hadn’t been much of a need to as the blossoming vegetation had offered a faux sense of cleanliness. It was chaotic, but colorful and lively in a way that seemed purposeful. It wasn’t something he could get away with anymore though, many of the flowers had wilted and their rotting petals littered the ground while tall grasses finally threatened to drown the shorter headstones. “I know it’s not . . . not great out here, but you don’t need to help me clean up.” There were hints of guilt and embarrassment in his voice, the graves were a responsibility he had taken on himself, he didn’t need to, it just felt polite given how he was either living on or near the land they once dwelled. “I don’t think the Flintstones mind.”
and just like that, a bright smile stretches across her otherwise somber features, the light in her eyes threatening to stay despite her best sulking efforts. HIS LIFELONG SPECIALTY. she’d almost forgotten how good it felt to be on the receiving end of it. ❛ touché. guess you can take the boy out of law school but you can’t take law outta the boy. ❜ she playfully remarked, rustling leaves in her wake as she walked towards him, ready to get to work in whatever way she might be useful. lana had pretty much forgotten about this part, though — his kind and selfless tendency to worry too much. brunette was quick to quiet said noble worries, ❛ no, it’s okay, i want to. it actually feels like personal penance, for not making it out to see my parents nearly as much as i used to since abaddon was taken care of — it feels like going back to my roots, too, in a way. y’know, the graveyard girl. that’s kind of how we met. i see no harm in getting back to some of that, specially considering how much things have changed over the last couple years. ❜ cue the big elephant in lana’s heart, the guilt for wanting to be in the brothers’ lives despite her picking up shop and quitting hunting. it felt awfully selfish, to continue to stroll in every chance she could when she could no longer really be of service to them and their journeys anymore — but that wouldn’t keep her doing it anyway. NOT ALL OF US COULD BE STRONG ON TOP OF SELFLESS LIKE HIM. ❛ besides, it’s nice out here. peaceful. and i’m not about to let you fix this place up all by yourself — as long as you’ll have me and my melodrama, that is. ❜
“ hey . . . keep your sorry’s for when you need them , ok ? & never apologize for doing what you think is right ––––––– especially to me. you made the right call , @griefnextdoor. trust yourself , you know what you’re doing. " 𖤐 sc.
trust yourself, you know what you’re doing. the words echo in lana’s head like an inspiring mantra, one she planned to hold onto whenever the self-doubt and anxiety over the possiblity of proving everybody right by not being strong enough to make it in the hunting life became too much to bear, threatening to paralyze her like a scorpion caught in fire. BUT NOT ANYMORE, because the one person she was afraid of disappointing the most with this risky endeavor had just given her the green light of his support, regardless of his personal feelings about it. SAM WAS CHOOSING TO TRUST HER, and considering all he’d lost in the fire, that was saying something. ❛ thanks, sam, that — means more than you know. ❜ brunette candidly admits, a genuine grin curling upon her lips, dimples making a stellar appearance upon her cheeks as she lightheartedly suggested, ❛ so, does this mean your overprotective friend days are over? no more growling at the idea of me joining you guys on a case, or making up excuses about why i shouldn’t tag along? ‘cause as cute as it was, it could get a little annoying. ❜
@carnagebled, cont.
the knight couldn't help but smile. ' i'm glad my reputation proceeds me, ' she turns her head ' unlike you. ' she sat casually at the table, not at all concerned in the slightest of the other ( @griefnextdoor ) . ' you are but a speck of dirt on my shoe. if you didn't talk i would've never realized you were there. '
❛ well, i don’t know if you should be — from what i could tell, you had more of a legacy dead than alive. ❜ lana nonchalantly spits out, venom bubbling like hot white rage beneath her words — after all, an adulthood worth of resentment and thirst for revenge wasn’t gonna go away with some quick face to face. this was only the beginning. ❛ funny, considering in the span of two weeks i’ve had more of your minions come at me than i’ve ever watched you sweet-talk into your little recruitment mission — that’s a lot of wasted resources for a speck of dirt in your shoe, specially for someone trying to gain supporters down in stingy hell. or was that just a figure of speech? better yet, were my parents just specks on the dirt of your stupid figures of speech, abby? or just the butt of your bootless joke of a popularity contest? ❜
tobeblamed, 𝖽𝖾𝖺𝗇.
hearing her answer brought some strange type of relief — the kind where he was supposed to feel but didn’t embrace entirely . it was almost like his instinct didn’t want to believe that she was happy on her own road to discovery . but he was witness to her coming thus far, and he had to take her word for it . hence, he nodded apprehensively, before her question peaked his interest . ‘ no … and he probably wouldn’t remember . ’ he suggested, evident in the way he held her gaze that he wanted to hear all about it . it made him already wonder what he must have told her that was so memorable and important for her to bring up in the discussion .
❛ oh, trust me, he remembers — he’s been giving me guilt-ridden puppy dog eyes ever since i walked through that door. ❜ and that fact didn’t provide lana with one single thread of comfort. her leaving was never about wanting to make him regret what he did, what he said, and the weight and hurt he knew that would burden her heart with — unreciprocated feelings or not, lana wanted sam to be happy, more than anything. with or without her. no amount of self-discovery or distance was gonna change that. but if she had a right to feel however it was she was feeling, then the brunette guessed the same applied to sam, too. hazel hues resigned to the inevitability of what she was about to share look into her friend’s eyes, ❛ nothing you and i both didn’t already know for years — that he knew all along what my feelings for him were, the unreciprocated romantic quality to them, and he just didn’t care to address it, because he didn’t feel the same way, and never would. the adjectives pathetic and miserable might’ve made a brief appearance in his little speech. ❜ she talked about it nonchalantly now, but that was an ability that had only been able to achieve through the grace of time and distance. much needed time and distance, or otherwise, she’d be holding back a flood of heartbroken tears right now. a flashing grin accompanies her self-deprecating self-awareness, ❛ again, nothing you and i both didn’t already know, but just because i was aware of it doesn’t mean i’d made my peace with it, y’know? which was exactly what his soulless dick persona forced me to do, so — guess everything worked out like it was supposed to in the end. ❜ she was also well-aware she didn’t really believe that, not entirely, but it was what she had to believe, and that was enough for her to make that into a full-stop. as far as the topic of sam and her went, anyway. THERE WAS SOMETHING SHE WAS MUCH MORE INTERESTED IN DISCUSSING: lana’s neglect of how her heartbroken decisions affected the people around her, like dean. specially dean. ❛ i know it was selfish, to up and leave like that, but i just — couldn’t face him, you know? specially not by pretending like nothing had ever happened, the same way i’d been doing since i was sixteen. i’m just sorry i didn’t tell you any of that any sooner. ❜
perfectly plucked eyebrows slowly raise, hazel hues scanning her up and down for hives or other alarming medical symptoms — ‘cause there must be something off with ruby ( @ofplanetsloved ) if she was asking lana for her moral opinion on her charachter. just when they seemed to actually be getting along with eachother. brunette answers with yet another sarcasm-coated question, a tentative smirk hanging from rosy lips, ❛ do you want the real answer to that or the sugarcoated version? ❜ the hunter joked, trying to relieve some of the lingering tension before dropping the teasing gimmicks and truly digging into her question, ❛ i don’t think i know you well enough to judge, but if there’s anything i’ve learned through being a hunter is that there’s no such thing as black and white, pure good or pure evil. sometimes, things are just a really confusing shade of grey, and the challenge lies in figuring out how best to face that. people are, like, the ultimate example to that complex ambiguity rule — at least, in my personal little theory they are. ❜ she genuinely concludes, head tilting in curiosity as she tried to read her features for clues, even as she was well-aware you wouldn’t know what was actually past those sky-high defensive walls until ruby wanted you to, ❛ were you just messing with me to see how i’d react or is there an actual reason why you decided to ask me that? ❜
sunsymbols, 𝗌𝖺𝗆.
“What can I say? There’s some tough competition.” Spoken as if there were any competition at all or as if Sam had any right to judge anyone. He knew he didn’t make it easy to be around; he had a tendency to hide his personality underneath a faux exterior, though, it was something Lana had always seen straight through (if at all) as she’d been there long before his walls ever were. And his circumstances were hardly any more tolerable either. He’d gone from a Stanford law student to wanted-then-dead serial killer in the matter of a decade. For so long, everyone had to tip-toe around him in case the law decided to target his accomplices and he’d seen plenty suffer as a result from just knowing him. “The standards are high for an old forest-dwelling hermit like me. Speaking of, get in here before a wild animal does — I had a bat living in the kitchen for two weeks before I could chase it out.”
former hunter can’t help but chuckle, that damned sarcastic charm of his. momentary glee lingered as a girlish spark in her gaze, tone playfully ironic as she responded, ❛ yeah, clearly. ❜ if only he was willing to open up his heart a little more, like he once used to, lana would have had to beat up around a dozen other dinner companion contenders before successfully reaching the door — but, again, as much as she knew he was joking about his high bar for social interactions, he was also dead-on: if he didn’t have company most of the time, it was because he didn’t want to. at least, not just any kind of company, and so the brunette couldn’t help but smile at her own clarification as sam invited her in, tone ever-so-lighthearted as she suggested, ❛ hot in a mature, introspective kind of way, mind you, and who says you’re not letting in a wild animal just now? after all, i did bring spices with my takeout. ❜ lana cheekily announces, bringing paper bags full with culinary goodies up for him to see, ❛ i didn’t know what you might be in the mood for, so i brought a little bit of everything — spring rolls, veggie tacos, chow mein. thought you might appreciate some real food to go with your hot, forest-dwelling hermit soup cans. ❜
