Sentences taken from Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Feel free to change names or pronouns as needed.
“Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.”
“If you stop telling people it’s all sorted out after they’re dead, they might try sorting it all out while they’re alive. ”
“She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a forest fire was beautiful: something to be admired from a distance, not up close.”
“Oh Lord, heal this bike.”
“You can hope for nothing. All you can hope for is the mercy of Hell.”
“It’s Tchaikovsky’s ‘Another One Bites the Dust’.”
“The future came and went in the mildly discouraging way that futures do.”
“A demon can get into real trouble, doing the right thing.”
“Don’t think of it as dying. Just think of it as leaving early to avoid the rush.”
“All tapes left in a car for more than about a fortnight metamorphose into Best of Queen albums.”
“I mean, d'you know what eternity is?“
“It is said that the Devil has all the best tunes. This is broadly true.”
“If you sit down and think about it sensibly, you come up with some very funny ideas.“
“You start thinking: it can’t be a great cosmic game of chess, it has to be just very complicated solitaire.”
“Most books on witchcraft will tell you that witches work naked. This is because most books on witchcraft are written by men.”
“People couldn’t become truly holy, unless they also had the opportunity to be definitively wicked.”
“People, meeting [name] for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide.”
“It has been said that civilization is twenty-four hours and two meals away from barbarism.”
"That’s sexism, that is. Going around giving people girly presents just because they’re a girl.”
"And just when you think the world’s full of amazing things, they tell you it’s really all dead whales and chopped-down forests and nuclear waste hanging about for millions of years. It’s not worth growing up for, if you ask my opinion.”
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