I used to hate my skintone.
When most of girls had pearly white and so glowing skin, I had a dark and dry and I can even make some sketches on my dry skin thighs (disgust!). My crush on high school ever said “the most darkest skin on a girl is like the lightest skin on a boy.” But I know what he said aint for me.
One day, after riding my bike from jakarta to depok at ever so sunny day, my friends yell at me; “You are so sunburned! You may get cancer!” Then I looked at my hands and yes, it was so dark dark black.
I was so scared, went rampage on scrub and soap and stuff (skin care is not common that day). I know I didnt do it properly, and it doesnt change instantly. My skin in the stomach still lighter than my arms.
But day by day it goes better. My skin aint sunburned again, it gets lighter and healthier.
I used to hate my face too.
Hard face, dark skin, awkward and odd chin, eyebags that went to the darkside and never back. ugh! How can be every other girl is so pretty and Im the ugly one? Its like my skin care has no effect (cries)
But this morning I looked at the mirror and ... wow. It turns out okay.
I had a pair of small eyes that it may looks chinese but my tan skin (yes after my skintone is lighter I can say its tan with proud) makes everyone never dare go racist to me.
After good sleep and relax at this WFH and no more gaming ‘til morning, my dark eyebags are vanishing slowly.
My chin aint so odd, cause it pops with my cheekbone when Im smiling and laughing. I dont need some blush to make it pop! haha.
And now, even with blotched face after crying the insecurities out, I dont hate my smiling face anymore.
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