Dean - Hi there Hamlet, my name is Robert Plant and this is my partner, Jimmy Page. We --- (cut off by Hamlet)
Hamlet – Cut the crap guys. I know who you are. Sam and Dean Winchester. Saving people. Hunting things. The "family business", and all that.I’ve heard all about you from a buddy of mine you helped a while back. Brutus. Remember him? His dead friend Julius kept haunting him saying that he killed him.
Dean – Oh yeah! Real troubled dude.
Sam – Yeah umm…Brutus did kill him. In cold blood. With a bunch of other dudes too.
Hamlet – Okay whatever. It doesn’t matter. Why are you guys here anyway?
Sam – Well we were hoping you could tell us what you saw the other night in your backyard?
Hamlet - Listen, I’m not going to talk anymore about it. I already told the cops about it and they just laughed and said I was crazy. No one believes me.
Sam - Well, Dean and I are a bit more open-minded than most. Why do you think you saw a ghost? You’re sure it wasn’t just one of your guards doing his rounds?
Hamlet – Like I told the cops before, it wasn’t just a person. It was…well it looked like…it looked like my dad, okay?
Hamlet – Yeah. Almost exactly. Except, the only problem is. My dad’s dead. He was found dead in the apple orchard out back a couple weeks ago.
Dean – (Under his breath) Ha! how do ya like them apples?
(Sam gives Dean a chastising look. Then turns back to Hamlet, apologetically.)
Sam - *Ahem* You don’t sound so sure…?
Hamlet – Well I thought I was. But that was until I saw my dead father walking around our friggen back yard in the middle of the night.
Dean – What do you mean? Did you talk to it…uh him?
Hamlet – Um well yeah. Well no. I sort of just listened as he went on and on about needing me to avenge him or something.
Hamlet – Yeah! I thought it was weird too.
Dean – Okay so did he say anything else? Like why the hell you’d need to avenge him?
Hamlet – No. Nothing. He…well he like evaporated before I could say anything.
Sam – Evaporated? He didn’t say anything--- (cut off by The Ghost of Hamlet)
(crash boom bang thunder lightning boom bang)
Ghost of Hamlet – LISTEN TO ME. I am the ghost of your father, doomed to walk the earth at night and trapped in the fiery pits of purgatory during the day. Oh I could tell you stories that would slice through your soul, freeze your blood, and burn your eyes. Yet mere mortals such as yourselves cannot hear this eerie description of the afterlife.
Dean – (aside) Ha. Been there. Done that.
Ghost of Hamlet – SILENCE. Hamlet, you must take revenge for this murder!!
GoH – Yes. The most foul of murders! You were right to question the cause of death because what you were told is a lie. I was poisoned yes, but it was not by a snake….well it was a snake of sorts. The snake who poisoned me was the same who now wears my crown.
Hamlet – Claudius?? I knew it!
Dean – And I thought our family had problems.
GoH – Yes that incestuous letch murdered me while I napped in the yard. Betrayed by my own flesh and blood! (GoH begins to disappear) I do not have much time here tonight, my son. You must remember what I have told you. (Continues to disappear) Avenge meeeeeee!
Dean – What the fu----(cut off by Sam)
Sam – What did he mean by incestuous?
Hamlet – Well...about a week after my dad died…well, was murdered…my uncle. He, uh, He married my mom.
Dean – Son of a bitch! Talk about jumpin’ the gun.
Hamlet – Yeah. Every family has their issues.
(Sam & Dean look at each other knowingly)
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