"I'm not even a real blonde."

 {AutoPlay} [Indie Harleen Quinzel/ Harley Quin RP blog ] -semi selective -oc friendly -multiverse -multiship -nsfw -five years of rp experience tracking: hammersandjokes {Mun: babewith-abow}

[hammersandjokes]

Hiatus update

I'm going to be coming back this weekend no matter what, I'm supposed to be getting a new laptop but if not then I will be returning on mobile even though I can't use icons;

[hammersandjokes]

So yes my hiatus will continue. I still don't have a computer and what I had save up is now going to my dog's surgery so I apologize to all the people I have threads with I'm so so sorry ;

[hammersandjokes]

A New Joke in the Book

“Oh wow.” He could take me out with a flick of his finger for god’s sake. “Uhhh, I didn’t mean to do it?”

likestofightcrime

[likestofightcrime]

“Fortunately for you, I’m no grim cowled vigilante. I don’t care what you do, particularly. All I need to know is what day this is, and what year.”

[hammersandjokes]

"Well lucky for ya' that sounds like my kind of deal. It's August 31st 2015."

[hammersandjokes]

“Yah, you seemed pretty rough out there.” Harley joked, a sly smirk on her face. Oh she was going to lose, but she was going to have fun doing it.

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

“oh honey, you have seen nothing” he smirked back as he offered her his hand, he knew he couldn’t hold back, not that he was going to.

[hammersandjokes]

Harley snorted and took his hand, smiling up at him as he helped her to her feet. There was viturally no pain, the material just felt weird against her skin. “Oh I can’t wait to learn butta'cup.”

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

“Glad that you’re excited, keep that mentality, it’ll help” he smirked as he led her to the training area, various punching bags and targets scattered across the area.

[hammersandjokes]

Harley got a good look at the place as they walked, trying to remember each turn they took until they entered the training area. “Oh wow, this place is huge.”

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

He went to stand across from her, cracking his knuckles as he smirked “So, shall we start?

[hammersandjokes]

a chill went up her spine at the sound of him cracking his knuckles. No matter what bone or joint it was she would always had that kind of sound. “Born ready suga’.”

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

He let his hands at his sides, the smirk turning for a more teasing grin “Ok, let’s see how fast you are” he stood ready for her attack.

[hammersandjokes]

She raised a eyebrow at him. “Well….okay.” The clown let out a shakey breath before quickly taking a quick step at him and throwing a few punches, still nervous about her knee giving out, even with the help of the disk.

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

He could tell that she was a little nervous because of the disk, he dodged her punches, not fighting back just yet, he wanted to test her speed, and so far with  her nervousness, it wasn’t going to help, she needed an incentive to feel more relaxed and so he took the final punch to the face, stepping back for effect  “Wow, you have a mean right”

[hammersandjokes]

She felt bad and good for landing her last punch on him, a hesitant smile on her lips. “Thanks, I tend to use my mallet mostly. I don’t usually rely on this kind of stuff.”

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

He nodded at her, keeping his guard up “Remember, the mallet can’t be the thing you rely on, you also need to know how to fight hand to hand” he smiled at he, showing her he was not angry “C’mon Harls, don’t worry about me, let loose, I’ll be okay” a little taunting might help her be more determined “Or are you chicken? he smirked as he teased her.

[hammersandjokes]

She gave him a small frown before swinging at him again, this time more confident. “You know, you are a lot cuter when you don’t talk? God all you bat-boys have loud mouths.” Her frown turned to a smirk as she started to enjoy herself.

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

“But, I thought people loved our sense of humour” he laughed as he went to dodge again, he noticed the difference, and that made him a little happier, he kept the smile “okay, you’re doing great”

[hammersandjokes]

His praise helped her gain confidence and start to fight like she actually trying to. “Pfft no way, it’s dry and lame, people only laughed cause you were so cute when you were young.”

[damaged-yet-unbreakable]

He just kept dodging, occasionally blocking her punches, he pouted dramatically “So I’m not cute anymore?

[hammersandjokes]

"Those words never came out of my mouth." She started to put some more force behind her punches as she stepped at him.

[hammersandjokes]

A New Joke in the Book

[quickism-deleted-deactivated202]

“No, I am finishing this.” He hissed. Once he could start running, she wouldn’t be able to let go or else…splat. He thought he had her, but he really didn’t expect her to bite him. Pietro quickly dropped her as he winced in pain and took a swift step away. “Are you crazy? You think I am going to give up just because you bit me?” He scoffed, but it hurt a lot. 

[hammersandjokes]

She did not expect hitting the ground to ever hurt this much. The blonde let out a loud cry as she went tumbling a few feet after her initial impact. Her skin burned as gravel and dirt got into her scraps, and the incredibly gruesome road rash on her arm and thigh. Harley refused to stay down as she moved up onto her feet and just looked at him. “Really don’t you know that by now? Not exactly Ha Ha, but it gave me time to come up with a plan.”

[quickism-deleted-deactivated202]

A humourless laugh escaped him once again as she hit the ground. That should’ve kept her down for a while at least. BUT she didn’t give up. Sure, he liked a good fight but this was dragging on. He wanted her out cold and locked up, as soon as possible. But noooo. “A plan?” Pietro quirked an eyebrow before quickly glancing around them for any nearby weapons. He kept himself ready, ready to run at her…or away.

[hammersandjokes]

God was she bluffing she had not plan, nothing on her that would help in a situation like this. Her stash was even farther now and there was to way she was walking with her injuries. She was done for, any attempt pointless with his speed. “Mmmhmm, ya’ think I don’t have other weapons bah, you really don’t know me well at all.”

[quickism-deleted-deactivated202]

Pietro watched her carefully. Waiting for her to try and run, to grab a weapon or something. He scoffed again at her words and neared her again. “I know you are LYING. You would have done something by now.” He said, a smirk playing on his lips. "Just admit it, you’re caught.”

[hammersandjokes]

Harley didn’t want to admit it to him, but his words were true, all she had were the small gag’s that would maybe delay him, but what would the point of that being. She stumbled back a bit as he started towards her once again, her heart pounding in her chest. She slipped a hand in her pocket, almost cursing out loud when her hand buzzer wasn’t there, it must of fallen out when she fell. She spat at him and gritted her teeth. “Screw you Mama’s boy.”

[quickism-deleted-deactivated202]

Pietro moved at a quicker pace now and grabbed her once he was close enough. Hoping she hadn’t found anything in her pocket. But it was apparent by her face and tone that she had no weapons, no plan. Good. Her words did hit him, but he brushed it off. “You aren’t so t o u g h now. You are just a PATHETIC looking clown.”

[hammersandjokes]

Harley screamed when he grabbed her and tried to kick at him with her good leg. She was going to be locked up anyway's, she could be a brat and a pain in the ass all she wanted now. "At least I'm not some lacky for some assholes who can't do the job themselve's. Such a good boy for your master's aren't ya'. Or maybe your more of a bitch than I thought. Do you enjoy belly rubs?"

[hammersandjokes]

Harley walked down the dimly lit street, her heels clicking against the wet concrete as she hummed to herself. The sounds of the city could be heard in the distance, siren's a great contributor to the noise. The clown raised a eyebrow as she spotted a stranger on the sidewalk, she dropped her bat to her side and blew a large bubble with her gum. When her bubble popped she stopped in her tracks, only a few feet away from the strange man.

"I've lived here long enough to know when someone is lost, unfortunately for you, Gotham isn't a nice place to get lost butta'cup."

silvertonguedliesmith

[hammersandjokes]

A New Joke in the Book

[hammersandjokes]

    Harley was glad to see him, even if she was a bit afraid if he would be mad at her for getting caught. But then again, it wasn’t her fault Two-Face shot her in the leg.

    The female clown smiled brightly, her hands gripping the bars of her cage tightly. “Oh Puddin I’m so happy to see you! How did ya’ get in he'ah?” She questioned, her skin covered in goosebumps from the thought of finally getting out of her cell.

    But Bat’s always was a impending thought in the back of her brain, she just hoped no one had caught onto what was happening yet, or else they might be both thrown back into a cell instead of just her.

[mcscxy-deactivated20200127]

Her leg was bandaged. Now that wasn’t something that had been reported back to him. If he had know someone else left a scar on her white skin he would have been there sooner. “The front doors. How else?” The Joker questioned with a wicked grin spreading across his face. 

Nodding his head he waited for a guard to let Harley out with a gun to the back of their head. “Pet, how were you hurt?” He asked feel a sudden need to protect Harley. Down at his core The Joker suspected he loved her but, it could also be he was hungry. 

[hammersandjokes]

Harley's finger's tapped against the cage bar's in anticipation as she watched the guard unlock her personal prison. His question made her stomach do a small flip, like a school girl spotting her crush. "I uh- I tried ta' sneak inta' Two-Face's little arms deal with Penguin, I thought the merchendies would be good and you'd be happy with the thing's I found. I managed to grab some stuff but then Two-Face shot me in the leg. When my cover was blown."

When she heard the key unlock her cage she eagerly pushed the door open, making the guard stumble back as she rushed over to Mista Jay. " 'm sorry Puddin'."

[hammersandjokes]

thorssif:

bless Thor for giving Steve his first opportunity to get wasted in 70 years

[prattandscott]

[hammersandjokes]

prattandscott:

The three stages of Peter Quill fangirling (insp.)

[redrcbin-deactivated20170616]

[hammersandjokes]

royharperrs:

HOLY SHIT THEY DO I'mM CRYING

[galgadotssss-deactivated2016071]

[godvegeta]

Harley Quinn through the Arkham series

[hammersandjokes]

Starter call !

[parapsychedarchive]

anonymous submission:

FYI my muse has a life outside of our threads! Send me a __ and I’ll describe an original NPC or unclaimed character who:

§   my character likes

±   my character dislikes

Φ   made my character’s day

×   upset my character

Σ   my character helped

€   my character hurt

↯   my character killed/wants dead

⇅   wants my character dead

♥   loves my character

∞   will always be remembered

≋   has been forgotten

[talktoten-a-deactivated20240813]

Send "You take such joy in pretending you're okay" to see how my muse reacts.

[hammersandjokes]

A New Joke in the Book

"Oh wow." He could take me out with a flick of his finger for god’s sake. "Uhhh, I didn't mean to do it?"

likestofightcrime

[hammersandjokes]

A New Joke in the Book

The clown was racing down the street, in her hand a nap-sack full of gold and guns she had taken from Two-Face. He owed her for stealing her mallet so she took enough to even out the stakes, but now she was being chased by his goons. She quickly ducked around a corner and knocked into something and fell to the ground hard. Harley groaned as she rubbed the back of her head. "God that hurt." @lostlittlegrounder