An Untold Goodbye
i clearly remamber, When I saw you for the first time with your stressed face, looked exactly like mine. My friends and yours are not around. The room was loud with exam talk, everyone flexing their preparation. But you sat quietly. I walked past you and sat down, the bench behind yours.
You were thinking. So was I, scared, hesitant, anxious about the exam. Did you notice me ? How could you? I was staring you from the back. We were from completely different schools. We didn’t know each other. We didn’t talk. But somehow, in that moment, I felt like one day we would. That we’d talk, know each other—maybe even share our pain. You know what that’s called? it's called- "koi no yokan" It's a Japanese phrase,- A quiet feeling when you meet someone and just know you’ll have a bond someday..
Do you remember what happened next? You laughed at my stupid opinion. I feel kinda bad and thought you are not so friendly. Back home, I told my sister, “Ugh, the boy in front of me at the exam hall has so much attitude. I don’t care.” I’m funny, right? Then you proved me wrong—in the math exam. You looked at me and said my name— I stared at you like I’d seen a ghost. That was so unexpected from you. Okay then you noticed when my friends calling me right? I just replied- "hum?" You ask me to help you also helped me. I was so glad. Somehow, we became a team , right until the very end.
Then came the last day of the exam. The last meet of us. Do you remember? You thanked me for everything.I thanked you too. And then I said my final sentence- “I wish I could know your result.” Then?? Then I walked away. Through the door, Across the balcony, Down from the second floor... You were watching me from behind, right? I could feel it.
you were just watching. Why didn’t you call my name and say- “Stop. How will you know my result if you don’t even have my contact?”
Do you know?
I kept walking. The distance between us kept growing. And I was praying— please, just once— call my name.
-Hana_shi
