How about a lil something where Jesse doesn’t know he’s pregnant? Like he gets no symptoms an suddenly somewhere really inconvenient he goes into labour but doesn’t know it’s labour and Hanzo is extremely worried and scared something serious is wrong?
“Position locked.” Jesse said, pressing into his ear piece. “I’ve got the left wig if they try to run.”
“Let’s hope you don’t have to run though.” Jack remarked over the intercom, laughing to himself afterward as if he’d made the best joke in the world. Jesse did the smart thing and stayed quiet, grinning and baring the comment. He looked over to Hanzo who was stood behind the opposite barrier to him, rolling his eyes and giving him a smile of solidarity.
Winston had found a leak in Talon’s data base with coordinates to a take over mission in Switzerland, underground a new power plant supplying omnic stable weapons. All agents had been sent to front lines, ready to engage with a terrorist attack, and that’s where Jesse came in. He was posted out near the left back exit with Hanzo, while Fareeha ambushed the scene of the attack to smoke them out. Other agents were spread about too, but none had a second partner like Jesse…
Two reasons for that: 1, Jack had deemed him unfit to hold his position on his own, and 2, Hanzo refused to let anyone choose Jesse’s right hand man so he insisted it be him. If anyone could settle his bruised pride, it was going to be him. Jesse didn’t feel particularly different in regards to his health, but he couldn’t deny the truth that was he’d packed on the pounds over the last few months. So suddenly and out of the blue, it seemed he had acquired a beer belly– and while it caused him nothing but aggravation, Hanzo was surprisingly supportive and a too little excited by the new addition. He didn’t quite understand why, but neither of them complained when it gave them an extra reason to not leave the bedroom.
Jesse tugged at his belt buckle, trying to give room to his pronounced gut. Despite how irritable he got about Jack’s side comments, he may have been right that day to have concern for his health. Jesse had been suffering lapping stomach aches all day, but he was too stubborn to give in and let down the team, so he stood strong.
“Just so we’re clear, McCree, I am serious about upping your training after this mission. It’s unacceptable to put you in such finesse missions when you’re unfit for the job.”
“Yepp. Got'cha, commander.”
“I mean it! If this job falls through because you-”
“Sorry, Jack, seems you’re breaking up.” Jesse interrupted, gritting his teeth, and then before he could suffer through another lecture he clicked end call on his in-ear device, sighing. He rubbed soothing circles into the ache of his swollen stomach and gripped his peace keeper tighter.
Hanzo could see clear as day the discomfort on his lovers face. Jesse had been up most of the night complaining of cramps in his back, but there was no changing his mind to participate in the mission. Looking around the empty tunnel they covered, Hanzo scampered to his boyfriend’s side and rubbed his back.
“Don’t listen to Morrison. You are perfect.”
Jesse snorted, smiling under a facade for Hanzo’s benefit. “Thanks, sugar, but I could do with losing a few couple pounds. I just don’t get it, I train as much as I can bare and nothing shifts. I stopped drinking months back too and even the taste of smoke started to turn me off for the first time in my life…my body’s damn determined to blow up beyond capacity, I tell ya.”
Before Hanzo can speak, they hear a distant alarm through the cave system, and the clear sound of Fareeha’s rocket launchers blasting through metal flooring. Both men shot up in their spots and prepared for a possible ambush, but then as if cursed, Jesse bent over himself as pain rendered him useless. He had to catch his weight on the pillar before his knees gave out underneath him. Like an electric current running through his veins, Jesse groaned through the agony. Hanzo was aiming his bow ready for the fleet, when he looked over to see Jesse in distress.
“Jesse? Jesse what’s wrong?” He asked, trying to keep his voice tame. No reply other than moans. “Have you been shot? Shall I call Angela?”
“No, it’s all-” but then he let out an embarrassing squeak, finally falling to his knees and wrapping his arms around his torso. Hanzo didn’t move immediately. He glanced between the dark abyss that shallow screams came from and the corner of his eye where Jesse moaned, and prepared to protect them both.
“Calling commander Amari.” Hanzo ordered, tapping in to his ear com and waiting. After a number of rings, Ana answered. “We have a problem, Jesse’s incapacitated.”
“Is he out cold? What happened?”
“I…don’t know, he’s just in pain.”
“Pain? What kind of pain?”
Hanzo finally lowered his bow to rush back to Jesse’s side. He knelt down and held his hand to Jesse’s forehead, pushing back his hair. Jesse had both hands cradling his bulbous stomach, and he was sweating profusely in such a short amount of time. Hanzo tentatively placed a hand on the rim of Jesse’s belly, and his eyes went wide. Through the specially redesigned armour, shirt, and skin, he could feel something churning within Jesse, solid as a rock and throbbing.
“His abdomen is in pain.”
A brief silence, more shooting, then the phone had patched through.
“What did I say?! McCree, get your fat ass up and fight!” Jack was barking through the caller, voice like poison. “You said you were fit for this, and so help me God I will-”
“Oh mother of FUCK!” Jesse suddenly shot up and screamed. His barrage of yells didn’t cease, making Hanzo turn pale in worry as he tried to sooth him. Jack’s voice went quiet too. Jesse huffed and puffed through a torturous seizure, slowly getting louder as the pain went on, until Hanzo couldn’t take it anymore and slapped his hand over Jesse’s mouth.
“You must be quiet Jesse! They’ll find us!”
“Hang in their boys, I’m sending Angela to see what’s wrong.“ Ana told them. “I’ve repositioned Brigitte to cover your entrance a few miles ahead, so she’ll hold off any firearm heading your way.”
Jesse continued to scream into Hanzo’s palm, muffled luckily, and awkwardly repositioned himself to have his back against the pillar.
“Fuck, something’s very wrong.” He hugs his distressed middle tight. “It’s like someone’s stabbing me!”
“Has your appendix burst? We must seek medical-”
“Had that out when I was a kid, it aint that,” the pain starts to subside, and the next thing they hear is a loud pop, accompanied by a gush of water between Jesse’s legs, soaking his jeans. His hand flew to touch his thighs. “I just pissed myself?!”
Hanzo raised a brow. “What?”
“Well, I didn’t- but I did?! My pants are soaked through!” He stopped for a second. “It don’t smell like urine though.”
“But I’m serious! Jesus Christ, I don’t eat that bad to have put all this on!” He held his stomach between his hands and gave it a gentle shake, barely moving any of the weight since it had hardened. “God was I poisoned or something?”
Hanzo dreaded to think. The worry consumed him like a plague, his mind racing for some sort of short solution- he’d settle for trading places if it would saving him. That feeling of being useless, it ate at him. He took Jesse’s flesh hand in his and squeezed, placing the other on his cheek. Everything in him was falling flat, and looking into his eyes, Hanzo feared that the worst may be coming…
Until Jesse’s dark pupils shrunk, and his grip of Hanzo’s hand tightened like a vice. He screamed, again, blood curdling and vicious to the point his throat broke, and Hanzo really panicked.
“GET MY PANTS OFF!!” Hanzo hesitated but Jesse growled. “NOW!!” And so he did as such, hands faltering as the nerves caught him. Jesse dug his nails into the ground as he worked through an intense tightening running through him, and lifted his his best he could for Hanzo.
"What is the matter?! Why am I-”
“You aint gonna believe me till ya see it.”
“What?!” Hanzo whipped off his pants in one fluid motion, and then froze. The sight between Jesse’s legs, leaving him speechless.
Jesse swallowed the lump in his throat. “Tell me if I’m wrong, but is it-” before he could finish Hanzo fainted, going completely limp to Jesse’s annoyance. “Crying out loud, this aint gonna be fun.”
Hanzo couldn’t remember how, but somehow he’d woken up aboard a boat, laid out in a medical bay. It was no time before he was jumping up, but a metal arm stopped him.
“Take it easy there, darling. You’ve had quite an experience.”
Hanzo looked up to see Jesse smiling weakly, his hair tied back and his face still shinny from an excess amount of sweat having coated him. Against his chest was a small bundle of blankets. Hanzo blinked rapidly, stunned silent.
“But…how?! Is that– do we have– I don’t understand.”
Jesse gently took a seat beside his lover, hissing as his sore muscles cried out. Hanzo’s eyes fell to Jesse’s belly too, noticing the large balloon version of his gut had deflated somewhat and now he was left with a slight pouch. Jesse rocked the bundle in his arms and leaned back, revealing a baby suckling their thumb, fast asleep and brand new. Kinked black hair and a light dusted tan over their skin, Hanzo was amazed.
“She’s why I was becoming the size of a damn house.” Jesse laughed, pulling down the blanket slightly as he coed. “Angela got to me in the knick of time, too. Dressed her and treated me. Luckily none of Talon came our direction anyway, so nothing was compromised.”
Hanzo stared at the little girl Jesse’s arms, then coughed. “So…she is ours?” Jesse laughed at the statement.
“Seems that way. I wanted to wait till you came too before naming her. That is, if you wanna keep her?”
In a flash, Hanzo snapped his neck round to stare at Jesse, stunned. “Of course. She is our daughter. I would not dream of letting her go.”
Jesse snickered. “Didn’t take much to convince you.”
“Do you not want to have a family together?”
“Oh Hanny, more than anything in this world. She could have worked on her timing and all, sure, but this here littlen is perfection and I love her more than life itself.”
Hanzo smiled. He pulled Jesse’s head down to kiss his temple, and then stroked his hand around her petit head. “We need to buy a lot to catch up with her arrival.”
“Sure, but first a name. I was thinking Lou, or is that too obvious? Don’t wanna just give her any old-”
“I like it, Jesse.” Hanzo sighs, happy in his shocked bubble of bliss as he put an arm around his family. “My darling Lou. Welcome to the family.”
And as happy as the pair were to enter an unexpected world of parenthood, Jesse was relieved to have a version of his old body back– more so when he got to flaunt his precious, adorable baby in Jack’s face. Little Lou was a gift, and something Jack had resented in Jesse he suddenly melted around.
It was crazy, but how typical that it happened to them?
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