I feel like I need to talk about the time I (mildly) offended Patrick Ball in public.
So, this summer, I attended a batshit crazy (affectionate) production of Hamlet three times. Yes, I did drive all the way to Los Angeles to do so, and yes, it was 100% worth it.
I was there because I desperately wanted to see Gina Torres act in person, and I was not disappointed! She was fantastic. The play was insane but in a way that felt truly like art: someone's vision, hated and loved, that Shakespeare probably would have deeply approved of simply because it was transformative and creative as hell. And what I didn't know until I got there the first time was that Patrick Ball, yes, Tumblr Sexyman™ from The Pitt, was Hamlet. And he was great! I'd watched The Pitt and really liked it, and I loved him as Hamlet, but I did not have the Tumblr Sexyman™ reaction that many do, and so I simply enjoyed his performance.
After the third and final production (the last show, on closing night!), I had finally gotten up the nerve to go find Gina Torres. So I asked multiple ushers where the stage door was, found it, and waited. The first person to appear was Patrick Ball himself, who emerged carrying a rubber skull that he'd stolen from the prop department. And he was a total sweetheart! He chatted with fans, signed things, and was overall just a lovely human. I ended up taking pictures of him with several people who had no one to hold their phones, because I love doing that shit for some reason.
And so, since I was waiting patiently rather close to the door, enjoying watching him interact with fans, he definitely noticed me. I kept seeing him glance at me out of the corner of his eye, and I would smile at him because yeah, I'm having fun! This is fun! Also I'm nervous as hell about Gina Torres.
And so, in a lull of The Pitt fans, he turns to me and says, "hey, do you want a picture?" And I'll stress, because some people I've told this story to thought it was because he was stuck up and thought everyone should want one - I was absolutely giving him the kind of body and social cues that would say, "I'm shy but I want to talk to you". This was probably one of the sweetest, most down to earth famous people I've ever met. He wanted to make sure that everyone who was waiting got a chance!
But I was startled. I had locked the fuck in on preparing to not be weird around Gina Torres. I had not been preparing to take a photo with Patrick Ball of The Pitt Tumblr Sexyman™ fame.
And so I stared at him, and he stared back at me, and then I said quite possibly one of the stupidest things I've ever said in my life:
"I mean yeah, sure we can, if you'd like one?"
I swear I watched every emotion run through this poor man's head. I saw utter confusion, the tiniest bit of offense, and a flash of the same concern I would have had in his place: wait, should I know her? should I want a picture with her??? It probably didn't help that he'd just been told that Noah Wyle had been there, but he hadn't known about it. I too would have been thrown for a loop if my big fancy co-star was at my play on closing night.
I stepped forward, fully game to just go for it... and then thankfully an ecstatic fan stole his attention away, and we were both saved from whatever the hell this interaction was.
Sorry, Patrick Ball. I promise I don't hate you. 😂
(And for anyone who cares, YES, I did meet Gina Torres, and she was amazing. 😍)
Not pictured: Patrick Ball's signature, because I didn't ask for it.
