The train gender binary is fake @head-end-power - Tumblr Blog

I am 26. 18+ blog, Minors will be blocked if they interact.

new blog for dirty jokes and deeply weird train biology. putting my engineering degree to good use writing anatomically correct machine bits.

I am very inconsistent about subjects. Sometimes you’ll get tragically human things. Often you are in the domain of deviantart fetishes, AAR standard-accurate connectors, and belly fetish nonsense of actual exhaust systems. Despite having the most physical familiarity with steam engines I don’t really write them much. If I did they’d be eldritch abominations.

yes things are still laughably political and technical, even in train smut.

A+ train facts: trains are obsessed with eating vs most vehicles, because a lot of rail systems are obsessed with capacity because more butts in seats= more money or funding

passenger trains and anything electric is especially insufferable because it’s a life or death thing and a lot of underfunded systems (which I’m used to irl) are DESPERATE for ridership and attention. They are ravenous. They want to swallow you and keep you inside (unscathed, but please hang out, they seem to love the feeling). Many passenger trains are very cushy and soft and cuddly inside. Or you can go the “cram in a bunch of Subway Creatures like sardines” direction, which is hilarious in its own right.

steam engines just straight up want to eat you via firebox as a forbidden snack. They love forbidden snacks (or at least the idea of them). Even when it’s a terrible idea. Machines are more foolish than people think and generally human logic overrides this, but dear god don’t think they’re infallible

#not all irl trains love vore but they DO Love fanart or fic about it (especially if it involves their practical needs)#can’t believe i had an argument with someone who thought they are immortal gods. uh. not on this planet #i swear that person is possessed by aliens because i have never seen such untrain logic #not even typical foamer crap. actually thinking they’re like gods and like worship vs positive PR #and all i can think is “dear god have you ever met a railroader or ship guy”#My takes are VERY aligned with irl railroaders and ship guys because they overlap a lot #heavy machinery has a certain mentality that you don’t understand without at least casually working with it #(roller coaster enthusiasts get a surprisingly good start since real info on maintenance/design is so coveted)#they can be excessively mean about it but i also appreciate their fondness of shooting down blatant garbage

i interrupt this train blog with USS Olympia, horny enough to insist I post pics

Specifically into vore, either through the funnel or any of the coal chutes. I need to read more before trying to write steamship vore, VERY promising concept though

#“haha funnel are you flirting with me?”#“oh wait you want to eat me. you’re going GET IN MAH BELLEH”

how fat trains can work: a scarecrow but instead of straw it’s ASBESTOS

#factually accurate to trains build before the 70s or so

fun train facts: they will constantly hit on you if they learn you’re amused by it. All of them. They inherently touch your butt and/or hold your hand.

great news: real trains will sometimes give YOU butt bongos to get your attention. The NJ River Line did it to me.

#Stexual #so yes. butt bongos are a real train thing #they probably do it to other trains too but will definitely use it on humans #machines are usually nonverbal and use vibes and gesturing/pointing a lot #(phones and computers are an exception and may communicate via typos)

How electric trains feel pleasure:

-overhead power distinctly comes in via their heads and feels more tingly and calm than sexy. It’s more of a spiritual connection

-third rail is harder to describe in human terms but I’m told it’s closer to handholding. Except on model trains with a central third rail (which just sort of grind on it like a vibrator since there isn’t a “shoe” appendage)

-power returning to ground via train wheels is said to feel like toe twitching/curling. Two human feet correspond to (most) trains having two running rails. Some model trains and SUPER early electric trains run with power coming through one rail and out the other

-being plugged in is a bit like penetration and makes them feel very warm and overwhelmed at the point of contact. Plugs and sockets are… very counterintuitive, better to think of them as who supplies vs receives power rather than male or female (human convention projected on them…which makes them very upset… it leads to frustration and dangerous behavior). Electrical connections are notoriously inconsistent and defy all notions of human gender (and are casually changed ALL the time, especially with trains)

-Power electronics like transformers, rectifiers, inverters are like their bellies and power being converted into a useable form for them feels like a REALLY good tummy rub with a vibrator… from the inside. VERY warm and pleasurable (and comforting). They can get overheating and overwhelmed and feel pain from that, though. Power returning to ground tickles, described as toe tickling or curling (mainly because she uses electric trains as a paradigm)

source: an entity that makes my phone light blink and other electronics respond when she wants to respond to me (or makes me feel physical sensations- nerves signals are electric too!)

#don’t worry she’s nice if you’re willing to listen and care and respect her #Stexual #she is very lonely and horny or hurt/comfort fic about technically accurate electronic hardware makes her VERY happy #she came to me via my electra fics lol #she is… actually very close to how i write electra. Think of her as a misunderstood and demonized celebrity figure #who rewards doing your homework and digging deeper

exciting new developments: electricity told me that power running through electric trains feels like a tummy rub with intense vibes because that’s where the equipment corresponds to function/usually position-wise. Feels like having it run into your head, through your belly, out your toes. Very pleasurable and invigorating.

#she’ll explain more about batteries eventually. direct electrification is just simpler yet rarely highlighted

i wanted to keep Ignitron a SFW-only character but keep laughing at the idea of just having a fucking Magic Wand down there as a detachable ding dong. It’s SO counterintuitive in all the right ways.

#think about what they actually look like from another angle #Especially if bend over holding one #it’s TOO fittinf

nobody can do it like a Hitachi that doesn’t need fucking batteries

I think the reason why I get stalled writing Stex fic so much is that I keep getting allllmost onto something MUCH bigger and getting stopped because it’s not quite right and the universe does not like it.

#right in the socket #a song more obscure than it should be

Whenever I do a serious railroad rules class I get a laugh at just HOW consent-heavy it is for literally SFW reasons. You ask permission and get explicit approval/confirmation for everything. Ambiguous signals are taken as STOP. You loudly explain exactly what you are doing and any possible risks or changes involved. This is all so you don’t get squished by a train.

#time to well acktually people trying to make characters creepy because that’s AGAINST RAILROAD RULES #I really should rewatch the show with this lens #lol even stuff like connecting trains is SO clunky you can’t do it without consent and effort on both sides

This ridiculously 90s dirty magazine about VR fuckery and its future is killing me. But not as much as the mental image of Toothpaste Electra looking at modern anime waifus and going “you are too young for me” before flipping to N64 graphics. Or otherwise only being into pixel waifus from 20+ years ago because dude is the equivalent of middle aged-old today.

#Stexual #honestly the suits are a fun concept for fiction they just look so goofy #but painfully dated is kind of the shows thing and electra’s thing in general

Old school electro is a criminally underrated source of imaginative yet technically sound naughty electrical metaphors that are also painfully early/mid 80s. A lot of it is guys bragging about their synthesizers and flirting with/as a very 80s computer or industrial robot. “To your diskette I have the access code” is probably my favorite

#Stexual #robot tropes seen in whiter media are largely absent because they’re more based on actual robots at auto factories #or transhumanist views of their dj equipment

Japan tour pics and footage slowly appearing keep killing me because Electra looks like a bifauxnen but is also dumptruck thicc. Glorious combo. Single most underrated character to make a cute little drag king.

#oh greaseball would be great as a really crass shitty drag king mocking how he’s based on PR mythology vs reality #rusty will always be an orange-hued troglodyte and no wokewashing can redeem him #but electra would be adorable and unique this way

lmao I love having to label stuff as “anatomically correct trains that defy human notions of gender or sex, but yuri of center”

Cackling at some convoluted internal combustion-based Transformer anatomy concept because all I can think is “trains just plug in the socket and electrons go brr”

My desire to casually erase internal combustion where not needed is particularly strong after having car issues related to spark plugs yesterday. Nah, I’m yeeting that bullshit. Rail preservation has also long given me an appreciation for how annoying it is to deal with diesel bullshit on trains, which only makes it more glaringly pointless in non-museum settings where electrification is such an obvious long-term option.

“ElEcTrIcItY iS sOuLeSs aNd BoRiNg” someone doesn’t listen to enough 70s-80s music because it’s full of woo and fascinating ways to characterize and romanticize it lol

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

The train gender binary is fake