Hedgehog Going for a PhD @hedgehoggoingforphd - Tumblr Blog

One step closer to a moment of truth: wrote three questions to my supervisor. Three, long overdue questions. 1. If it is possible to resume my studies after such a long pause. 2. If it is possible to change the topic to something completely else. 3. if she would stay my supervisor if I promised to be as little of a burden as possible and not to make her delve into my new topic.

Now all that remains is to hope, that none of the three answers to the questions will be a strict “NO”. Everything else I can take and deal with. At least I think so.

Finished walking 140 kilometres to, among other things, ask the other expert of the field of my New Topic, whether she would agree to help me out where needed with my thesis. She said she would if I really thing she could be of any use.

It was already more than I hoped for.

Had an amazing WhatsApp call with the person who I hoped to get as my guide and expert in the field of my New Topic. She agreed and is ready to help me out not just with the field but, if we figure out things right, even with getting the first publication accepted for the journal of their institute. A journal that actually suits acceptable-for-thesis categories.

Things go too well to believe.

Response received. Can be summed up into a “get two publications accepted and then we will see about the formalities for the degree. But - she did not say no to remaining my Supervisor. She did not say no to anything.

I take it as a green light.

Finally took my courage to get myself together and write those three long overdue questions to my supervisor. 1. Is it still possible to resume studies after such a long pause? 2. Is it possible to change the topic to something completely different? 3. Would she agree to stay in the role of my supervisor, if first two things would happen.

Now off to wait for the answers, hoping that none of them is going to be a strict “NO”. I can figure things out and deal with anything else.

It is impossible to find the right words for the feeling of being in love with one’s thesis topic. That this is IT. Compared to the very first one, that was not even mine, and proved that PhD is impossible with a topic you do not own (and the imposters syndrome is huuuuuge...), compared to the second one that was fun and, thankfully, stopped working before the fun got out of the picture (that would have inevitably happened).

With this one, the love has been there since I remember myself (seriously, the first conscious memories are connected to it in one way or another), and now there is a question that I am really and genuinely interested in answering to.

Reading to catch up with a field academically new and completely unfamiliar after a full workday feels like the dessert of that day. That should be a good sign.

Bought my first ever Moleskine. For some reason I have been walking around for a week or two with a wish in my head to start over the thesis notes in a heavily overpriced product of marketing and whatnot, knowing well that there are ten times as cheap alternatives looking just the same.

Bought it anyways.

Sweet little moments of an adult-able-to-afford-consumerism-moments life.

It is always so hard to write that first e-mail to someone you wish to get some help and assistance from. All the dillemmas: how long should it be to show you are serious and care and not be too long, how much of background and how detailed the foreground information, where to put the questions you actually want to ask...

When intended thesis topic becomes your party topic and you can actually talk about it and sound somewhat smart, it is time to start writing up what you know and have found out so far.

Also, countdown until professor’s “I might have some time at the end of November” works way faster than it seemed couple of weeks ago.

Me: And even if this whole thing [new topic] does not end up being a thesis and getting me a degree, I still will have hell of a knowledge of a topic I really am interested in.

My trusted study buddy: You should go for a book in that case. You are so good at writing fiction.

Me: ???

My trusted study buddy: I still remember the paper we had to write in that course we were paired up.

“Oh my god,” said my supervisor when we talked last time, quite a time ago, with a new and quite promissing (until the informant-finding stalled) idea on how to salvage my PhD-ship. “I am listening to you and now I understand you have never been a media scholar. You are such an anthropologist in your heart.

Well. If third time is a charm then this should be the topic that will get me my degree. And it is so anthropology that I will desperately need her help to keep it on communication studies track at least with the tiny toe of one feet...

You know your laptop is lightweight when, while working aside, you have to hold it down to your lap to avoid the wind blowing it away.

#academicfun, #thesiswriting

I tried to level up and upgrade my search terms to "Oracle 202". All it got me was ton of offers to buy tickets to a Goldenstate Warriors game in Oracle Arena, section 202.

Cheaply, though. At least they told so.

- If someone checked my browsing history for anything, one would be deeply shocked. By seeing how dominant "Oracle 101" is in there.

Last day at Uni. A prorector who, when I told him on a bypassing mode that I am leaving, had not understood that I am leaving forever, not just from the Rectorate premises, wrote as a response to my “here are my contacts” that he was sorry I am leaving and the Administration Boss has already some ideas of how to try to attract me for some Uni staff anyways.

Good news: on my terms this time.

That awkwardly unsurprising moment when in less than half an hour you get to to know that the only person not thinking of a new job in your department is the boss.

Talking about employee satisfaction: doing strategic level stuff with freezing hands. Not metaphorically. Literally freezing, because there is winter on the other side of that not-so-well-isolated window.

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