;That's me, Ms. 20 Something;

A 1x1 blog with four muses. Charlie Winstead is 24 years old. Working in New York City for her own company helping an orphanage in Indonesia. Orginally from Lima, Ohio but hasn't been there in three years. For more of her bio check out the link. Maisie Lancaster is 18 years old and a student of NYU's art program. She suffers from a chronic illness but refuses to let that get in her way of life. On her good days there is no oxygen tank on the bad days there are. For more on her bio check out the link. Daisy Livingston is 25 and a bar singer working on her broadway debut. Sky Grace Carver is 22 who is still working on her upcoming YA book series.

[hellocharlie]

Would You Be So Kind. |Maylett

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Scarlett’s body felt way too tense, since she woke up. New York life was something she had never imagined it would be and living with her sister, and basically knowing her made her feel so excited. She wanted to ask her if she needed any people in her magazine, but sometimes, she forgot and some other times she thought that she wouldn’t have the time to do that.

After getting dressed and basically getting ready to go out, she couldn’t stretch all that tension from her body. Everything seemed weird with her and she wasn’t sure, she could talk to anyone about that for now. Her heart started beating faster, as she reached the coffee shop and taking a deep breath didn’t help, as she felt a sweet numbness in her brain. She rolled her eyes with that feeling and pushed the door of the coffee shop rather abruptly, her head already moving around the place to see if May had arrived there. She sucked on her lower lip, as she found the other girl and coughed lightly, as she approached the table she was sitting. “Hey”, she said with a nervous smile and tapped her fingers on the table, before finally sitting on a chair close to May’s. “I hope I’m not late”, she said and pushed her hair to the side.

A cough caused Maisie to quickly turn her head towards the sound. The smile the grew on her face was so wide that the tubes almost fell out. “No you’re fine I just got some coffee i’m waiting for it to cool down but i’m super impatient.” A small giggle left her lips as she placed the coffee between cold hands. “I was going to order for you but didn’t want to get you the wrong thing.” 

There was a sense of relief that washed over her when Scarlett arrived. It always seemed like life was pretty normal and swift with the girl. All of that causing Maisie to wonder what these feelings truly meant. How was it that after all this time a girl with beautiful brown hair would change it all. Yes it was obvious that no feelings would ever be mentioned. This was a friendship that was new and exciting something that needed time. “How have you been battling this amazing weather?” A smirk on her face now.

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Is that a Star Wars reference? You watch too much of it. 

You can’t make too many star wars jokes in life. You will learn that one day. 

[hellocharlie]

Hello again friend| Skylle

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

What if they don’t understand it, though? What if I gave myself and I keep giving and all she does is waiting for ME to apologize? It’s a never-ending circle. Do you know how many times I’ve fought with William about it? I mean…not exactly fought…but I keep thinking about what the hell I did wrong. Ranting is good. Do go on.

That is a great idea. Honestly, I still love him. Not like…that way, but he’s the only one who treated me better than the rest (not counting William, of course). I mean, like Chad and Jesse. And sometimes, I feel bad that I was so selfish and stubborn on that decision. But, you know, even if it didn’t last long, you and him were doing really well. By the way…are you still married…?

Something like a Christmas present, yeah. 

Well that’s just how they are though they want only you to apologize and that isn’t right. Therefore you owe them nothing like that. I get you having arguments about this all it effects your life just like anything else would. People say that friends can’t hurt you and that isn’t true at all. Friends can hurt you the worst cause they know the weaknesses. 

Rory was an amazing guy and I loved him two but something happened. I don’t know what happened but it did and I had to live with that. Which I have and now I gotta just move on from it at all. The divorce all of it is done with and I need to live my life for myself again. Well I don’t think I ever actually just lived it for myself fully. 

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Probably during the summer. When you can’t handle the heat, I’ll just throw ice on me and donate to charity. Sure, I’d love to. Oh yes. That’s where I usually go in the mornings and when I get to have a break. Why are you asking?

Awesome well I will give you my number so I can text you where we can meet up. Since that might be easier for us to make sure we get to the same place. I thought I recognized you but wasn’t sure, I sing there sometimes. Well I sing there a lot but lately i’ve been auditioning for things.

[hellocharlie]

Home where no heart is.| Winstead family

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Scarlett sat up, as Charlie made that introduction, feeling more confused than ever as her sister talked. A bunch of scenarios danced around her head and she frowned, still not knowing why Charlie would think Scarlett would react that way if she knew. She’d never think less of Charlie-never ever. She sighed heavily and nodded so that Charlie would go on. She glanced at her mom that was looking down and back to Charlie.

Scarlett bit her lower lip, holding herself not to say his name-she barely remembered him now-but it was surely something she wanted to blurt out. Scarlett started blinking fast, thinking of all that. She couldn’t help but extent her hand and hold Charlie’s. She wasn’t sure if she’d understand what happened then and Charlie would be a mess. “It’s Bruce, isn’t it? It’s that guy?”, she tried to look in her eyes. “Didn’t you ask for the reason? The reason he left you. That’s obscene, Charlie”, she shook her head and stood up abruptly, pulling her hand away from her sister’s. Her mother shook her head, feeling sadder than she thought about the situation that she partly knew. “Those kind of people should be ashamed they still walk around free and think that they can’t apologize to anyone. If he apologized I would be okay”, she ranted and then, widened her eyes as she saw that she was talking rather quick and fast. “Did he apologize?”.

Charlie had no expected this reaction from Scarlett at all. Normally the younger sister was reserved but still able to show her anger. This time however it seemed that enough was enough and it made worry fill Charlie’s heart. Something must’ve happened when she was gone and that just made the girl hurt a little harder. 

“Scarlett please I understand that it’s just a shitty story through and through. Believe me I had to come to terms with the fact that I never got the proper expiation for anything that happened to me. Bruce apologized in some way but it was cold and it still explained nothing. I had no reason as to why this all happened and it sucks. To this day I live with it all and it sucks.” Her face felt warm as she got up to hug her sister tightly. Understanding the anger that was flooding through her cause this was already felt. For years the girl lived with her life turning upside down and there being no closure. Of course the idea of it sounded ridiculous to people who weren’t in her mind. “I got what I got and I took it. I took it and ran and it wasn’t the right way to deal with it but well that’s all I could do.” 

Tears ran down the girls face as she hugged her sister who was sadly almost taller than her. There would be a curse to being this short and this was it. All of this hurt so many people and that was why it was never talked about publicly. No one truly knew what had happened to the girl after everything. How inside herself she became due to the post traumatic stress of it at all. So no one got it and when it was explained it never truly made sense.

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Or maybe that I haven’t made enough copies of the manuscripts, or I think that’s the case. You know, I am keeping too many copies of everything, but in that nightmarish situation, no…I…supposedly didn’t have any more copies. It’s my crazy anxiety.

You had no other copies? Oh no i’m so sorry to hear that. See I have to make a digital and psychical one or else I get really nervous one will go missing. If you need some help shooting ideas that you remember around I could try and help. I mean I get the whole writing disasters. 

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Not really sure if that’s a little symbolic, but the Grinch appeared in my sleep and started tearing apart all of the manuscripts. 

A feel that if you told a professional they would say you may be afraid of Christmas. Well honestly I don’t know what a professional would say cause i’m not one. A shame to hear about the manuscripts, do you have any back up at all? 

[hellocharlie]

Company cocktails| Zaclie

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Zac’s smile grew wider, as Charlie laughed with his statement and bit his lower lip, chewing it softly. He took a small sip of his beer and leaned a little closer so that he could hear her better. “Well, I bet”, he chuckled with that. “After hearing your story around about Indonesia, I cannot imagine you as someone…partying. I know that you’re from Lima, Ohio. Or so I’ve heard from the gossipers around here”, he smirked as he turned his head a little to look around. People were looking-among them his ex and he smiled wider with that, looking back at Charlie. “Amy is a friend of yours from here? Lima?”, he asked.

Charlie crossed her legs as she nodded finishing her first drink already. It was hard to be in such a big crowd plus all of them wanted knew her. There was literally no where to hide just this tiny escape. “Well there I wasn’t drinking.” A smirk grew on the girls lips before she waved the bar tender over. After he nodded she got closer to Zac mostly due to the music being so loud. “Yes I am from Lima, Ohio and it’s very boring there. That is why I think I was a party girl but I haven’t partied in years.”

“Another?” The bar tender asked and she nodded with a big grin. 

“Amy and I knew each other in Lima she was the girl that kept me on the straight road.” Charlie placed her hand out for the drink as if was routine. “Thanks Jim!” The man nodded and gave Zac an odd look. It was probably due to him never seeing her with a guy. “Sorry Jim knows me and I think he just wants to make sure you won’t kidnap me.” The girl took a sip of her new drink before placing her finger up. “Oh right Amy! Anyways we grew up together and she was always there for me. Even when no one else was cause they didn’t know how to approach me after...” Her words just were flowing until she realized what she was doing. “After some stuff went down.” Rolling her eyes at that horrible save she took another sip of her drink. “Where did you umm grow up?” She was trying so hard to change things and make sure he didn’t catch any of that. The last thing he would want to know is about the past.

[hellocharlie]

Home where no heart is.| Winstead family

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Once her mother sat down, she widened her eyes and looked at Scarlett that instantly rolled her eyes. “Don’t get me started”, the woman said turning to look at Charlie. “Yeah, you don’t have to. I’ve already told Charlie what happened”, Scarlett pouted.  “God, Scarlett-what you did was extemely bad. And not talking to me was also bad”, their mother said and Scarlett couldn’t help but frown. “At least tell me what wrong”, she said and Scarlett turned to Charlie. “You have a story to tell”, she whispered.

The feeling in the room became stuffy thanks to that question. Charlie almost hit herself for not realizing that it was the wrong question. However Scarlett then reminded her of what she needed to do. “Alright so this is why I left and Scarlett I need you to know” she paused and sighed “i didn’t want you to know cause it was hard. It wasn’t cause you needed to be spared the details. Apart of me felt that once you knew you may think less of me.” 

Charlie felt her heart just racing as she tried to find the right words. “I was in a relationship that was going on for a couple of years. Both me and him really found peace each other but not in a normal way. It was kinda how we just handled each others pains. Then I got pregnant and we were happy at first. Until I was put on a high risk pregnancy and things spiraled out of control.” Looking down at her fingers that she began to pick at she sighed. Her thumb was now bleeding thanks to her horrible habits. Biting her lip she sighed “I one day lost the baby and him. The baby died before I gave birth and he just left me there in that room by myself.” 

The last sentence was the hardest due to normally blaming herself. This time she refused to let that happen since it was in now way her fault. Her gaze fell making it hard to look in anyones eyes. Fight or flight felt like it was about to kick in but there she was frozen. 

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Amy giggled with every reaction Charlie had and smiled lightly, looking down “Yeah, freak ‘em. ‘Cause he’ll get to talk soon and I don’t want to explain to Landon how he heard that. Not that he’ll believe me, when I tell him that I use the F word”, she giggled with that.

After sipping some coffee, Amy licked her lips, thoughtfully. “I’m going to think about what fantastic beast I want to be”, she looked up in the ceiling, feeling Victor already stretching his arm to get his water bottle. Amy handed it to him and looked at her friend. “If that’s the case, he has to be accepting of learning new things. I’ve met people that they haven’t watched Harry Potter, and they’re doing it intentionally to piss people off. Like they want to make a difference for that. And they don’t want to learn a new thing. If Zac is like that, get him on a date and ditch him”, she said seriously. She shrugged with what Charlie answered her next. “Oh well…then, you won’t screw it up”, she smiled at her. “Yes, you should figure it out yourself”, her smile grew wider and hid it behind her cup as she kept sipping her coffee.

“We can’t use those words around the padawans they are too tiny for that. They shall learn those words later like when we are old and gray.” Charlie grinned wide at not only Amy but Victor. Trying her best not to burst into giggles due to how weird she was finally able to be. It had been so long since she was able to be this way, just happy.

Placing her empty coffee cup on the side of the table she looked down at Victor. However her full attention was on what Amy was saying. All she wanted was to hold this tiny little boy and soon her arms began to reach out. Quickly her arms went to the sides “I hope you figure out soon what you are. I truly have no idea what creature I am. I just know they are all so cute.” Learning forward she shook her head “I think he would be open to learning about it well I hope he would be. However we have yet to even go on a date or anything so we have some time here.” Looking back at Victor she then pouted “Amy can I hold him?”.

The question was so simple but holding kids was nerve racking. Due to her past she truly felt that all that was her fault. Unable to hold her baby at all and now to see this toddler. He was smiley and with the most squishy cheeks you could imagine. Times like this when she looked at other children she wondered what hers would’ve been like. The idea was torturing but Charlie did that best to herself.

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Ah that is great! And interesting name choice. Yeah, I do. I mean…why not? It was part of your life-part of how you created where I am working. Again..why not? Good, you’ll show me next time we meet.

I think, it’s too early for me to know what happened…isn’t it? So, I’ll just let it slide. You just need to keep the…what you’ve learned from what situation, anyway. The positive aspect of it.

He’s named after Remus Lupin from the Harry Potter series. Well then I will have to remember to show you all the photos I have with me. It may look like I have a bunch of children cause my dog things it’s a baby. 

I’ll let you know what happened i’m sure one day. It’s not like I don’t see you at work sometimes ha. However thanks I try to do the whole positive thinking thing.

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Oh I do know that. Just never tried it out.  You are? Good. Whenever are you free? Nice to meet you, too, Daisy!

Well maybe you should try it out! Actually wait don’t do that it’s freezing outside. Umm oh wow i’m free tomorrow would you like to get some then? You look a bit familiar do you ever visit the Blue Bird? 

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Do you think Victor will like it? Can I bring Victor with me? Whenever that happens.

Of course victor can come! I would love that! Well I mean I am free for a week so if you want to do something let me know. You both can stay over it’s a big enough apartment. Scarlett is over at the moment.

[hellocharlie]

Hello again friend| Skylle

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

And it’s really hard to show that you care, when the other person is looking at themselves and only themselves.  I’m trying to keep them in the past and sometimes, I think that making amends will work-but then, I realize that maybe I overthink that, too. Maybe, they’re still the same person that…keeps a long face to minor things. And waits for me to only give, when I never get anything in return. Nobody’s perfect but…I was just I don’t know…I’m rambling again. I’m just glad you’re okay. And back to tumblr.

Anyway, you really need to meet my friends: Alissa, Alexa and Caitlin. They’re in my shipping list.

 Ah…same lovers. We have a past with that, don’t we? Still sorry about it. 

Yeah, I do. I’ll probably learn around Christmas, if they’ll get me. A lot of people keep telling me that.

OH MY GOD-that is amazing. If you’re able to send me anything of yours so that I can read it, please-please-please do. We are on the same city again.

I learned a lot when being away about how people can really mean it if they are true to you. Sometimes you have to realize that you gave it your all and that is well it. That’s it you gave it what you had and didn’t get it back and that isn’t your fault. Once you give someone your all there isn’t much left, if they can’t handle that then it’s their fault. Everyone want’s to blame themselves but really it’s not always that way. See now you have me ranting! I am so glad to be back I can’t wait to catch up with. 

Oh I can’t wait to meet your new friends we should have like a wine night with netflix! We do have a lover in common but yeah don’t worry I had to go through a lot after that one. Not with you but with how everything went down. I mean I really had to take some time for myself after all that due to how invested i let myself get with it all. 

Well it can be a great possible christmas present my fingers are crossed! Oh i’d love to send you my writing!

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

You need to show me how you do it. Like you really SHOULD!

You have so much to learn young padawan!

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Yay to that. I cannot wait.  Again…we really need to catch up.

Well we shall be doing that soon. I will see ya little one.

[hellocharlie]

zacxam-lieblog:

Even with that smug face. I think, they should always be in fashion. I don’t think I ever wore one, as a child. Maybe, that’s why I like them much more now.

They always have pockets and are just really handy even if going to the bathroom in them sucks.