todays bird

if i look back, i am lost

Janaina Medeiros

shark vs the universe
YOU ARE THE REASON

Product Placement
Claire Keane
Stranger Things
cherry valley forever

Love Begins

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I'd rather be in outer space šø
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Sweet Seals For You, Always
almost home
Sade Olutola
tumblr dot com
Misplaced Lens Cap
Monterey Bay Aquarium

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@hernameiswritinwater
Although we read with our minds, the seat of artistic delight is between the shoulder blades. That little shiver behind is quite certainly the highest form of emotion that humanity has attained when evolving pure art and pure science. Let us worship the spine and its tingle.
Vladimir Nabokov (via artpropelled)
writermusesā:
Nate had never felt more convinced he was going to wake up at any moment. Did she really just talk books to him, quote something beautiful and act like Earthās gravitational pull hadnāt just shifted directly to her. He kissed her then cupped her face, thumbs brushing over her cheekbones. It was written all over his face, the confusion of where sheād been his whole life.Ā āWhat bookās that from?āĀ His fingers moved back down her back, slowly slipping under her clothes, massaging into her warm skin. Sure, he wanted to know the answer to the question, Nate was exceptionally well read but couldnāt tell if it felt familiar because it was Caria or because heād read it, but he also couldnāt stop himself from just wanting more of her. His mouth moved down her chin to her neck, kissing the vibrations he found there as she spoke. It was exciting and confusing, how simply hearing a person could make him want to more. When Nate finally spoke again his voice was raw, gruff with anticipation, and still so completely bashful.Ā āHow private is it up here, Caria? Because I need you like I need to breathe and⦠and I never do this but I need you.ā She could say no, she could slap him out of this trance, but Nate knew if he didnāt say it then heād regret it. On the other hand, he already knew this was it, heād never have a spark like this with anyone else.
Cariaās response was hesitant on her lips as she felt his fingertips slip onto her skin and with a shudder, her eyes closed to soak in the sensation of it. Without a word at his rough voice, she drew herself back and with a hand in his, drew him up from the bed under the stars. Even if they could be private, she couldnāt guarantee it there and she wanted nothing and no one to break this spell. It took only moments to take him back down the stairs, cosmo at his side and back into the apartment, the warm lights flicking off until only the bedside lamp glowed, drawing them into her small bedroom. Brushing her lips to his, she sought her path along his mouth until she found a kiss, letting it slowly deepen as she ran her hands under his jacket and pushed it gently off his shoulders, letting it drop to the floor, her own dress pooling at her feet under his deft fingers. It was only moments from the door to the bed, as she knelt on it, drawing him down with her, intoxicated by the feel of his hot skin on hers, the wine on his lips, the intensity of the chemistry between them. With just the pressure and weight of her body, she pushed him back until he was sitting, and setting herself into his lap, Caria let her lips dip to his jaw and neck, herĀ voice breathless between the faintest of bites.Ā
send š£ for my muse to blurt out the first thing they think of when they see your muse.
writermusesā:
Pem perked up,Ā āOh? What did you go to Istanbul for? I almost never meet anyone that isnāt family or friends of family thatās been.ā With a smile, she shrugged,Ā āIt can be difficult and even scary at times to travel, but with Kuzey, my phone, and some optimism Iāve had mostly positive experiences. Mostly I do stick to touristy places because theyāre more likely to be accommodating to people with disabilities and I travel alone. I still havenāt found my forever travel companion, I guess.ā Pem didnāt mind traveling alone. Sheād been scared at first but years of it had helped her adapt.Ā āOh, Iām a ceramist. Pembe Rosa is my small business. I pretty much run on orders, but Iāve been thinking about offering sip and glaze sessions where people can paint items Iāve made. How about you, what do you do?ā
āI work for the UN, I was over there to assist on a project in their sustainable development targets. I work mostly in projects related to violence against women and serve as a diplomat channel between projects and local authorities. Iām still quite new to it, but the work is very rewarding.ā As Adele listened to her talk, she tried to imagine the stress and extra planning it must take to navigate a world mostly not built for you and a wave of empathy struck her.Ā āI am sorry that you havenāt found your companion yet, I hope they appear soon and can take you a little off the beaten track... but if you like, while Iām in the city, we could do some exploring? I am here for almost a week... in fact tonight I have a spare ticket to my Husbands concert if you would like to come with me?ā Whipping out her phone as soon as Pem started talking about her business, Adele scrolled through her work, fascinated.Ā āThese pieces are wonderful! I can understand how such a tactile material must be so engaing for your senses. How did you get into ceramics?ā
writermusesā:
Matt tried not to take the new plan as Aless being reluctant, but he also hadnāt kept tabs on Aubriannaās phone use.Ā āI put her in therapy, got her the phone so she could call and text or FaceTime you when she missed you. Other than you physically not being there with us itās not like we made any changes other than my own schedule so I could be around more.ā He wasnāt sure why he was confessing to his own inability to cope with her absence, but he was.Ā āAnything you left is exactly where you left it. I didnāt date or get mad about the separation. Youāve always been my world- you and Brie. Maybe thatās messed up that I sort of always thought or hoped youād just walk right back in our lives, but itās all I wanted and I know itās what she wants too.ā Running his hand down his face he sighed and reached out for her, covering her hands in his.Ā āWhatever you think is best, weāll do. Iām not going to pretend itās not going to hurt like hell leaving you, even for a day.ā
Truthfully, Aless was terrified. The feeling so overwhelming, the desire almost enough to completely render her undone that it felt dangerous, that she didnāt trust herself enough to let it drown her again. It wasnāt that she ever thought Matt would willingly hurt her or Aubrianna, in fact she knew he would do everything he could to never let that happen. It was terrifying to think she could ever hurt that little girl, that she would ever feel sad or lost of abandoned because of Aless. If it didnāt work out again, it wasnāt just her heart on the line, it was just Mattās, it was a completely precious little heart as well. As he took her hands, she breathed out and closed her eyes. Trust in God, she thought to herself, he brought Matt back to her, brought her this moment. Love was the way. With one more steading breath, she nodded and opened her eyes.Ā āOkay, Iāll come with you. Now, today, if you must go. We can... we can work everything else out. Itās you and Brie that come first.ā
writermusesā:
Sitting up a little after staying quiet while Eittie cleaned the wound and patched him up, Tavi was torn between scaring some sense into her and promising to stay the night. The problem was that he knew despite how she looked, she was harder to scare than anyone heād ever met and the longer she looked up at him the less resolve he had to leave her. A part of him wished he could promise her that he was more than a street boy, more than a killer, that the darkest parts of him were fleeting- they werenāt and he wouldnāt lie to her. He reached out and brushed the spot where his blood had been.Ā āAt least until dawn, then.ā
His fingers turned another lock of her hair in his fingers again,Ā āYou goinā back to bed now that you fixed me up, CaiƱa?ā Tavi sighed, knowing if this situation was with anyone else heād be gone by now.Ā āThank you for taking care of me.ā He mumbled an almost inaudibleĀ ālo sientoā as his fingers moved from her hair down her shoulder and arm, tugging her to him. It didnāt matter how much pain he was in, it was a dull ache in comparison to how much heād missed her and that ache was made worse by her little confession that she wanted to kiss him again.Ā āI donāt deserve even a fraction of the kindness you keep showing me for my stupid bullshit Iāve put you through.ā
Eittie would never understand the way he seemed to beg forgiveness of her when in her eyes he had saved her, again and again. From others, from Teague, from herself. Would she ever be able to tell him how much he had changed her life? How much more colourful she found the world now, how much more self assured she felt because he was in the world with her, even if he was a thousand miles away? Perhaps one day she would be able to voice it, but she doubted if he would ever believe her. Without saying anything, she slipped up onto the edge of the lounge and drew him down so that he was lying down on his back and she was wrapped to his side, her legs slowly entwining with his until she felt sure he could not disappear on her in the night.Ā āOctavius..ā Eittieās fingers found his chin and tipped it towards her so she could look at him in the faint light.Ā āI have missed you. I want you to stay not because you are injured, but because I have ached for you.ā It was true, she got on with her life as best she could, accepted that he could not be there all the time and could never allow himself to stay longer than a few hours for the sake of his work, but it didnāt stop the wistful fantasies creeping in on the edge of sleep, not of wild sex or raucous adventures but of his quiet voice in the dark, the soft Spanish that wrapped around her senses, that sense of knowing, that she lay in the arms of someone who not only held her body, but her mind and her heart.Ā āI would go through stupid bullshit every day if it meant falling asleep with you every night.ā
writermusesā:
With her fingers tangled in his hair, Henri let out a relaxing sigh. He could get used to this, he thought, definitely wanted to. His free hand reached back, shutting off the water as he pulled her out with him and to the bed. Puddles of water pooled on the tile and wood floor as he fell onto the mattress and tugged Eittie onto him.Ā āYup, think we made it all right.ā A sly grin spread across his lips and he pulled her mouth to his before tugging the blankets over them. No amount of Hawaiian heat could stop a post-shower chill and it made him miss the heated floors of his place in Boston while being so glad she had her there to keep him warm.Ā āSo, what was that about getting yours?ā
Eittie laughed as the blankets came up over her head and she was smothered in darkness. Play fighting her way back out, she settled herself onto him and began pressing kisses to his jaw and neck.Ā āI can wait, I donāt want to tire out my old man now..ā The cheeky giggle that followed her words were almost waiting for the retaliation. In all honesty, Eittie didnāt keep score and they had days, weeks, months, years ahead of them for her to get hers. Pushing his hair back from his forehead, she pressed a kiss there, gentle, before cupping his face, smiling down at him as her thoughts raced. Happiness, he was pure happiness to her.Ā āYou are sunshine to me, Henrik Oliwa. Pure sunshine.ā With a kiss to his lips, she settled down with her cheek pressed against his chest.Ā āThank you.ā
writermusesā:
There was always work to be done with Delmore. Emails to clear, conferences to crunch numbers for, and speeches to work on. At the very least Nathaniel knew he needed to brush up on his Korean for his upcoming trip to Seoul. The second he heard the water turn on, though, it took every ounce of concentration to simply click through and flag emails to read later. A part of him wondered if heād always feel like this; electric, like it was the first time being around her. Heād only been about five minutes into the speech heād pulled out of his briefcase, highlights and notes lining the margins, when Caria shut off the water.
Nate let himself drink in the sound of the cottageās floorboards creaking as Cariaās walked to the office. The corners of his mouth turned up into a soft smile when the familiar smell of her took over the small office, every inch of him scratching to reach for her and wrap her up in his arms while he buried his face in her neck and hair. Then, as if she needed that too, she was siting on the edge of his desk. As if the pen was suddenly on fire, he tossed it to the desk and he wrung his hands and looked up at her.Ā āIām exactly where Iām supposed to be. No visitors unless you invited someone home or ordered something.ā Reaching up, Nate turned a lock of her hair in his fingers.Ā āI donāt think I could ever miss a smell, but the second you walked inā¦ā
He trailed off and smiled at her. Nate wrote poetry and read more books than he could count, but words failed him. His hands moved to her waist and he pulled Caria onto his lap. With his lips pressed to her shoulder, he took in a deep breath, etching this moment of pure peace and happiness into his memory. When he looked up at her, with his bright blue eyes through long dark lashes that needy look that only she could draw out of him on his face, dopey smile and all. Leaning up, he stole a quick kiss, a hum passing his lips as he wrapped his arms around her more tightly.Ā āAre you opposed to be stuck to me like this the entire time youāre here?ā
Caria didnāt respond with words, knowing that she could never match the way he spoke, his knowledge and love of words always describing how she felt long before she could verbalise it herself. Instead, she let the warmth of her body speak for her as she slipped into his lap, a leg on either side of his as the hot dampness of her post shower form pressed in against him. The ends of her hair were wet, leaving trails along her collarbones and then onto his as she cupped his jaw and pressed her lips to his, slowly. It was deliberate, the thought of this moment occupied Cariaās waking thoughts all week, to be back in his arms and how she would show him the depth of her longing for him. Perhaps it would have been more normal to be playful, to flirt but something in Caria felt this far too deeply to make so light of it. Gently, she found his left hand and slipped it beneath her sweater, letting his fingertips find the heat radiating from the under curve of her breast and there, the pounding rhythm of her heart. Yes, it said, always. As she drew kiss after kiss from him, her hips rocking closer each time, her own fingers skimmed down his shirt, releasing each button lovingly, drawing open his belt gently, pulling away the layers between them until the burning heat of her thighs pressed against his.Ā
writermusesā:
āDonāt act like you doubted it for a second.ā Tavi chuckled in near-silence as he crossed the room and took her hand when she offered it to him. He sank down on the floor next to her, using his free hand to pull all of the throw pillows to the floor with them. After getting comfortable, crossing his legs, he laced his fingers in hers and looked down at them. Hers were smooth and small, he could imagine how many books sheād turned pages on in their time apart. His were calloused and scared, bruised knuckles, and scrapes in various stages of healing.Ā āI would crack a joke about me being a criminal and being some master card-counting cheat, but my end of the crime scene doesnāt involve card games or Vegas heists. So, yeah⦠Iām a little worried about what you have up your sleeve, CariƱa.ā
It was a split second, the kind of realisation that shot through your nervous system and made time stop. It was a small gesture, something no other two people with their bond would hesitate to take. When Octavius hand found hers and he laced his fingers with her own, Eittie felt a shock that started in her fingertips and ran to her heart before, not a split second after, an incredible rush flooded her body. They had been hidden, the both of them, for so long. It felt like being naked, their hands entwined without the cover of a pillow between them, without darkness to shroud them. Even though they had kissed at her apartment, somehow this intimacy felt deeper. It was intimacy and safety, a private space where they could be as they were. Under her own fingertips she could feel the cracks and cuts on his own and the last thing she wanted to do was to play games, she wanted to lay him down and kiss every fibre of his being back into healing, into care. Heart thumping at the realisation, it took her a moment to bring back the lightness of the mood and she looked up from their hands to his eyes with a smile.Ā āYou might have an advantage though, if you keep touching me... I can barely think.āĀ
writermusesā:
With a long, quivering breath, Nathaniel fell onto the bed next to her. He hadnāt even realized heād been holding it, but his chest rose and fell in a frantic cadence. The pain of oxygen deprivation in his lungs was a reminder that she was real, but without her there, pressed against him, he still somehow doubted it. Nateās arms reached for her and he pulled Caria onto his chest with little effort. After gently brushing her hair from her face, his blue eyes searched hers before he slowly moved in for another kiss.Ā āWhatever you want.ā His words were whispered, one by one between each kiss. Then he ran his thumb across them, soft and pink, perfect, and let out a long sigh.Ā āIs it like this with everyone? You just say a word and they bend to your will?ā The sun, the moon, two of every animal, Nate could feel it just looking at her, heād give her anything she asked and in that moment all he wanted was for her to ask him to stay.
The sudden rush of cold at his physical absence had Caria turning immediately to follow it, like a siren song she sought out his warmth again, thankful when his arms showed her the way and she relaxed her body onto his. As she returned his kiss, she felt her heart clench at the wordsĀ āwhatever you wantā, she knew what she wanted, it was here, it was now. Did he know what he wanted? Did he want this too? Of his own free will? Touching her nose softly to his, she let a rugged breath out against his cheek as her eyes closed.Ā āIāve never felt this with anyone, ever.ā In truth, Caria had never slept with anyone on a first date, let a lone a first meeting. It was impossible for her to look into his eyes and think of not falling into this feeling with everything she had. Was this what it felt like? Love at first fight? A part of her, the part that was slowly being muffled by the intensity of feeling was calling out that she knew nothing of him, didnāt know his surname, didnāt know his history but the part of Caria that was so wholly in charge in this moment, her heart, shouted it down with the truth. She knew his eyes, was learning the cadence of his heart beat, could describe his lips in infinite detail.Ā āThe moment...ā The quote from a book she was reading began to tumble from her mouth before she could stop it.Ā āThe moment I saw you, a part of me stepped away from my body and wrapped itās self around you, and there it will remain.ā A sense of beautiful and messy danger in this knowing made Caria smile and she brushed her lips to his.Ā āI have never felt an authors words more deeply than right now.ā
writermusesā:
Watching Eittie absorb the information that heād made a special space all for her made Henriās face warm and his heart race. There had definitely been some concern that he didnāt get it right or that sheād worry that he was doing too much and taking away her independence, but he just wanted her to feel like this home that had been his was really and truly now theirs.Ā āDo you like it?ā Henri asked, looking down at her as he leaned in the doorway and then moved closer.Ā āDonāt have to tell me twice to pinch you.ā His laughter filled the space as he pinched her on the bum and scurried to the other side of the room.Ā āStill real?ā Eittie planning out the room seemed to be confirmation enough that she really liked it.Ā
āI donāt know what Iāll do once you have that Ph.D. Iām definitely going to have to start reading more than sports magazines and hockey legend biographies to keep up with you.ā It never bothered him that she was out of his league, her intelligence had always been one of the most attractive things about Eittie. Cautiously moving toward her in fear of retaliation for the little pinch, Henri wrapped his arms around her, caging her in as he rested his chin atop her head.Ā āYouāre going to do so many great things. Iām just so happy youāre willing to do them from my favorite place on the planet.ā Truthfully, heād have tried his best to keep the long distance relationship going as long as possible because he believed she was it for him. It couldnāt have changed that Boston was as much a part of him as the blood in his veins.
Eittie tsked when he started on about having to read more.Ā āYou know that itās just another piece of paper right... you could write a PhD on hockey game play, you have more than enough knowledge... itās no different, except mine comes with a piece of a paper.ā Grinning a little, she looked up from her cage in his arms and kissed his jaw.Ā āAnd of course, the Dr title. You wonāt mind be Dr and Mr Oliwa one day?ā It didnāt occur to Eittie that was she was actually talking about was marriage, that to be introduced as such meant a wedding, rings, eternal promises, only that it felt like it was nature that one day that would be it, that they would both be under his name.Ā āI love Boston, Iāve loved it since that first drunken night in the bar when a tall goofy looking stranger came up to me and grinned like and idiot and I grinned like and idiot right back at him.ā Did they know, even then? Were they grinning because they knew everything that was ahead of them? Did their hearts know before their minds did? Probably, thought Eittie, it had been the case every day since then.Ā āI love it here and I love you.ā
writermusesā:
Thaddeus smiled, but shook his head in mock disapproval.Ā āMaāam, you keep those perverted little mittens to yourself.ā He laughed and shook his head, not an ounce of seriousness to be heard in his tone.Ā āYouāre happy with a million dog children? No more human ones?ā Truthfully, Thaddy never thought of himself as capable of being a parent until he was head over heels for Ros. It was only her, no one else could have ever possibly convinced him otherwise. He glanced at the food and to her, a devilish look in his blue-green eyes.Ā āThis thing got a timer?ā His hands went to her hips and he picked her up and set her on the counter, lips crashing into hers.Ā āSomething something, burn the kitchen down.ā Thaddeus laughed into her mouth before he continued to kiss her,Ā āSomething something, put a bun in the oven.ā She really made a mess of him. If they werenāt going to starve she had about ten seconds to push his calloused hands away.Ā
With a squeal of delight as he picked her up, she laughed as her legs drew him in and kept her there.Ā āI didnāt know this apron was so attractive to you darling, I will be sure to wear it every day now..ā Between the kisses and the laughter, her right hand searched the counter top blindly, pushing bowls, pepper grinders and cutlery here and there until it found the old kitchen timer they had. Breaking a kiss, to look down at it, setting it for 20 minutes, she grinned up at him with the timer held high to show his time limit before tossing it back on the kitchen island counter she was sat on.Ā āYou had better shut the door, Batman, weāre already running out of time.ā Smacking his butt as he went, she pushed the space around her clear and pulled him up onto the island with her, laughing as she yanked his shirt off and hearing it hit the fruit bowl across the room and apples falling on the floor and rolling everywhere. The familiar weight of her husband, those warm textured hands were like a song every time, even after all these years she could find that deep seated joy in the performance of it, or even in the quiet humming whispered in her ear in the morning.Ā āCāmere you.ā Pulling off the apron, she slipped it around his hips and pulled him in tight and hard to her own as she kissed him again.
marimelwritesā:
The sound of her old nickname for him made his heart stop, glancing at her in surprise. The nickname alone conjured up numerous memories, sweet moments of the two of them together, times where Ty had smiled more than he had since theyād been apart. āAll these years, and you still call me Kitty.ā He chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief, but there was a pleased smile on his face. This was her name for him, only hers. Heād never let anyone else call him that, he likely never would. It wouldnāt seem right if it came from anyone but her. āYouāre making me sound a lot more exciting than I am, love. I donāt have sl many adventures. I travel for work, I workout to stay in shape, I hike to see the beauty of the world around me, I read and read and then read some more. I do still read scripts in bed, but less just in the morning, more like⦠whenever I get a chance and Iām not about to fall asleep.ā Ty admitted. āIām afraid Iāve become more boring with time. And you? Tell me all about your life since we were last together.ā
The smile on his face at the nickname warmed Adele through every fibre of her being. It was a special thing, to be able to recall time and space like that.Ā āI donāt know, that sounds like the perfect life for me.ā When he asked about her own adventures she shrugged softly and looked out at the park they were walking through, sipping her coffee in thought a moment before looking back to him.Ā āHonestly, I have been just trying to maintain peace. Back in Los Angeles... when I got there, when I met you, I was falling out of such a dark place, it took me many years, even after we last saw each other, to truly lay that to rest.ā To anyone else, those words would have been vague but she knew that he would remember, he would understand the effect such abusive relationships could have on someone.Ā āSo, I went to school, got a couple of degrees and now I run a womenās refuge and law centre here. There had to be some silver lining somewhere.ā The smile that appeared on her lips was warm and genuine at the thought.Ā āOther than that, I bought a house, got a dog, planted some shrubs and tried to build a life. I still dance around the kitchen like a lunatic though.ā
Under the Clarke tree for Lachlan:Ā
Amongst the usual collection of sweaters, shirts, socks and longed for records, was a large parcel. Wrapped carefully within a box is a new, hand carved music desk for Lachlanās grand piano. In dark oak, the desk was long enough to hold the myriad of Lachlanās papers and scribbles. Across the centre of it is the first bars of the first song he wrote for the family.Ā
The card readsĀ āyou make us eternal every day, we are forever grateful to be in your heart as you are in ours. Love us all xā
@writermuses