Hey everyone! My name is Elle and I will be your host while you're here. I don't often tag things, but if there's something you'd like tagged, please let me know and I promise to do my best to do that for you! That being said, this is largely a fandom blog with whatever grabs my fancy in the moment. Example are: Supernatural, Sherlock, KNK, SNK, Disney etc. I also love to write Dystopian fiction and therefore I do "research" by reading lots of young adult dystopian fiction so if you want to suggest a series or talk about one you've read, nothing would make me happier! In fact, if there's anything I can help with or do for you, always know that I'll be happy to do my best to lend a hand if you just drop me an ask :) Enjoy your stay!
there is a very real tendency of teenagers with anxiety disorders self diagnosing with considerably more stigmatized and impairing mental illnesses (e.g. schizophrenia, DID, personality disorders), but the best response to that isn't to get angry with them for "appropriating" lol. instead you show them coping resources for the problems they're actually having and deemphasize diagnostic categories in general. if an 18 year old is claiming to have alzheimer's, they're probably making an innocent mistake and are in genuine distress. be kind.
Also I think this trend comes, at least in part, from how brushed aside anxiety disorders can be. If your parents and teachers dismiss you with 'oh everyone feels anxious', then inevitably you're going to start thinking that there must be something else going on with you
”You must feel very scared right now; let’s talk about how to help you personally, tailored to your symptoms” will always be more helpful than “stop faking (X) for attention”. If theyre that desperate for attention or an explanation, something is wrong.
studying history is like. here's to another beautiful day of not being pregnant and of having no obligation to ever be. thank you women who fight for abortion and contraception and independance from men for another beautiful day of not being pregnant and of having no obligation to ever be
i 100% believe every single adaptation of superman should be judged for accuracy based on how well they understand just how completely unhinged lois lane is as a person. because if you think THE lois lane wouldn’t do [fill in the blank], you’re wrong. she absolutely would do that and she will not be apologizing for it. superman being in love with her only succeeded in making her more comfortable and willing to do insanely dangerous things than she already was. because yes, she will 100% launch her body off a skyscraper just to prove a point. and guess what, idiot? she was right, so it was completely worth it and she will be doing it again. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, lois lane is absolutely bat-shit crazy. clark just happens to be really REALLY into her particular brand of crazy. like there is nothing lois won’t do with the right motivation. she is an absolute force of nature and that should scare the shit out of you.
The more I learn about queer history and see of our queer present, the more I believe exclusionism of any kind is fundamentally at odds with queer existence, community, survival, prosperity, and joy. Strictly categorizing and isolating and policing and excluding people is what cisheteronormativity is all about, we don't need to emulate that here!
Having been in a good relationship for seven years now, I'm still sometimes amazed just how nice things can be. Like I can show you affection??? And it feels nice to you too?? My presence and touch aren't just tolerated, but enjoyed??? I can look at my sleeping boyfriend and think "wow, it would feel really nice to just cuddle up to him right now" and he will either unconsciously communicate "no thanks" without even waking up, or wrap himself around me tightly enough to let me know that it feels nice to him as well. And also I no longer have the option of wrangling myself free without waking him up in the process.
What a splendid love it is to know that your partner can say "no", and knowing for sure that it means that every wordless "yes" truly means "yes". If you could combine the best of silk and velvet, it would still not feel as lovely to touch as my beloved's skin.
If you adamantly refuse to even hear an opinion or point of view that differs from the one you've been taught to believe, you don't actually believe the one you've been taught. A genuine conviction doesn't waver from something as flimsy as mere exposure to disagreeing ideas. If you fear that hearing an idea that deviates from the "right" ones might make you accidentally adapt it, get the two confused and forget which one was the "right" and which one was the "wrong" idea, and get rejected by your peers by accidentally echoing the wrong kind of thoughts, you don't actually truly think that the things you've been taught as right are right.
Not because you would somehow deep down secretly think that the "wrong" ideas are "right" and the "right" ideas are "wrong", but because you simply do not actually think at all.
Kinda like parents who are worried their kids being exposed to outside ideas will turn them down the wrong path. Well if it's that easy, it sounds like your propaganda just sucks and you don't really trust it. Let that shit run free in the marketplace of ideas if you're so convinced you're right.
We need desperately to start celebrating the overlap of identity instead of hyper-scrutinizing whether or not someone overlaps fully.
Marsha P. Johnson never called herself a trans woman--she called herself a drag queen, or a transvestite--yet we recognize the impact she had as part of trans history. Of trans women's history. There is so much effort to re-imagine her influence as being the one who "threw the first brick" at Stonewall and less effort to remember her as one of the co-founders of STAR, an org dedicated to the protection of sex working transvestites. (Which took influence from both queer orgs and revolutionary orgs like the Black Panthers). Whether it's a lack of terminology or her transness was not under such a narrow definition (the P. in her name stands for "pay it no mind" because when people asked if she was a man or woman she told them to mind their business, and said "I think of myself as me.")--she is part of trans history because drag history, transvestite history, female impersonator history, gnc history is trans history whether the participants would consider themselves trans women or not. It's transfeminine history.
Stormé DeLarverie, the person whose violent arrest sparked the Stonewall uprising, is described as a drag king, and as such, every publication--including queer coverage of her involvement--lump her in with cis women's history and never also transmasculine, despite the fact that while she didn't identify as anything to those who knew her, she preferred to be assumed to be a Black man. That's transmasculine history. That's lesbian history. These two histories are not mutually exclusive, yet we act like they are.
Leslie Feinberg described hirself as a trans woman--zie was trans and a woman. Queer coverage tries to decide whether that makes Feinberg a cis woman or a trans man. Neither. Leslie has influenced transmasculine history and transfeminine history, and has been part of women's history with hir feminism. Leslie was a pivotal voice in trans movements, and focused much of hir work on the overlap with "female" identity. Leslie has arguably moved the needle more for trans women than trans men due to hir focus on women, but those are not separate categories--victory for trans people of any type is a win for us all. Transmasculine history is not wholly separate from "women's" history.
Emi Koyama is responsible for popularizing the word "transfeminist" and was (and still is) a deeply influential voice in the trans and transfeminist movements. Emi is also intersex, and her identity has been used to discredit her status as a "real" trans woman. Her influence is in intersex history and trans history and women's history. These communities are not non-overlapping--Emi occupies all three!
Kate Bornstein has been one of the most influential trans theorists since the 90s, yet her work has been largely erased as time goes on. Her focus on nonbinary identity and attempts to break us out of a binary seems to be the cause of the strife. A writer, speaker, poet, whose work focuses on the overlap of many trans identities and the empowerment of the individual to find the language that suits them ought to be the single most talked-about style of transfeminism...and it isn't. Her name is fading from people's reading lists.
Riki Anne Wilchins created one of the most influential groups fighting against the exclusion of trans people from pride--and other queer events--alongside Denise Norris: Transexual Menace. She created the term genderqueer. She has written countless influential pieces about trans life and those of us who exist even in the margins of trans identity--and she wrote often about the overlap with nonconforming cis people, whether they later come out or not. She even founded GenderPAC.
Nonbinary people, intersex people, gnc people, genderweird--those who never had the language and those who didn't use it for whatever reason--are part of TRANS history. We do no one any favors to assign labels to people who didn't use them to legitimize their already-legitimate existence in our minds as part of the movement. And we do no favors to narrow our eyes and block the door until the folks who bled, cried, fought, and died for us--the trans community--call themselves what we prefer to hear.
The murder of Brandon Teena galvanized countless trans women. Trans men were some of the first to issue fundraisers for Miss Major when she first fell ill. There are so many trans people who do not see separate niche groups but recognize the collective under this big umbrella of transness--we desperately need for those groups to not be in the minority. Trans is a collective, not a club.
And what does trans men? Anyone who doesn't fit the cis narrative of gender.
Quotes from trans folks about what transgender means to them:
Dana Turner: "...you are a person that feels, in your spirit, your mind, your soul...different than your physical anatomy--your biological anatomy."
Leslie Feinberg: "--whether that be transexual women and men, or masculine women and feminine men, or bearded women who allow their beards to grow, or women weightlifters who can't use the women's bathroom because they've been pumping iron--it can mean everyone who doesn't fit that Ozzie and Harriet paradigm of sex and gender."
Kate Bornstein: "Transgender is just a big ol' umbrella term that includes just about everybody I know.
Martine Rothblatt: "To me, the civil rights movement, the feminist movement, the gay and lesbian and transgender movements all really are one and the same. These are all movements to respect people as individuals rather than as a body type that their genes determine for them."
In like 1998 my very femme lesbian friend went to Pride in London and was all excited at the “teddy bears picnic” happening in one of the city parks. She took along a picnic hamper and her cuddly teddy bear. Needless to say, the large hairy gay men all thought she was adorable and she had a great time
I don't know who my intended audience is here, so whoever needs to hear this, I am begging you to learn to participate in conversations that are about things you aren't interested in.
Part of socializing and having friends is being a good listener even when you don't actually give a shit about the subject.
Your are hurting other people's feelings when you bluntly respond with "Anyway..." and then change the topic.
It can not always be about your preferred topic.
You are being rude. Yes, even if you are neurodivergent. You can be both autistic and rude.
