HIMIKO

Trans survivor and creative soul 🖤✨ | Making games, music & art | Just trying to channel all this chaos into something I love 🌌

[himiko-creations]

Hello little ghosts!

I'm leaving here one of my Letters for Ghosts commission that I did. I feel pretty good with how it turned out, hope you enjoy it and thank you again for reading little ghosts, I'll see you later! Take care!

Letter for ghosts - An Anthem

By: Himiko

For: Anon

To the one who is still crawling through the halls of my crooked mind.

I don't know if you're alive in me,

I don't know if I burned you away

The part of me that let me build a house of colors

Where are you now? I feel so lost please let me drown my sorrows

Some days you're out there

Some days you're away

Like a melody that fades into the choir

I see you fighting,

I see you running,

And I just watch how you dry out

You said "I feel so lost in here"

I know I feel lost in me too

Figuring out how to explain my feelings of blue

You said you're fine but I don't trust I know my mind is cruel

Some days you're out there

Some days you're away

Like a melody that fades into the choir

I see you fighting,

I see you running,

And I just watch how you dry out

I follow you through this rotten house

Opening the doors for you to pass

Figuring it out just to survive

I will take your hand tonight

I have fade away in this mess

Every fucking door feels like a cage

I don't know what it should feel anymore

But I promise we'll get out of this

A purple sky the feel of numbing pain

It's all still I feel unreal today

Dissociation from a life that couldn't see a light

Restless monstes crawling in my mind tonight

Some days you're out there

Some days you're away

Like a melody that fades into the choir

I see you fighting,

I see you running,

And I just watch how you dry out

I follow you through this rotten house

Opening the doors for you to pass

Figuring it out just to survive

I will take your hand tonight

I have fade away in this mess

Every fucking door feels like a cage

I don't know what it should feel anymore

But I promise we'll get out of this

I have cried away in my eyes

But somehow they manage to stay dry

Tonight my demons took control

I might just disappear from this world

Some days you're out there

Some days you're away

Like a melody that fades into the darkest pit of my soul

[himiko-creations]

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Today was heavy. I lost many hours cleaning a mess I didn't do, feeling lost and tired. I thought my creativity left me for the day. But somehow, this small song draft appeared in my mind.

It's imperfect, it's strange, it's messy, but what I appreciate about it is that it's real to me...

The art is made by me by the way... Just a silly pixelart I did the other day... Hope you enjoy it anyway! For reference, this track was made today in around 2 hours.

Thank you for listening. 💫 P.D.: I will continue to work on it, but I thought it would be interesting to show you part of my creative process. You can listen to it in my Ko-fi too! It's open to everyone!

Hope you enjoy your day or night wherever you are! 🌈

[himiko-creations]

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This was the first track I ever made years ago.

No structure. No plan. Just a feeling I couldn’t name.

I ended up calling it “A Dark Wake Up,” and that title stuck with me. It became the name of the universe I’ve been slowly building ever since. I didn’t know what I was doing and, honestly, I still don’t. But I remember the feeling in my chest when I made this.

It felt like something shifted inside me... Suddenly I felt a click... It kind of stayed through the years...

So I’m sharing it here now, as a kind of beginning. If it resonates with anyone else, that already means something. It's posted in Ko-fi but I'm attaching it here too if you want to listen from tumblr directly.

A Dark Wake Up

HIMIKO published a post on Ko-fi

[himiko-creations]

✨ Letters for Ghosts – A Poem for the Feeling You Can’t Name

🕯️ Do you have a feeling you can’t name? A memory that lingers? A silence that needs words?

I’m opening a small, emotional writing commission called Letters for Ghosts, where I’ll write a custom letter, poem, or lyric fragment based on your feeling, thought, or story.

This is for anyone navigating heartbreak, healing, nostalgia, or just floating in the fog.

You send me a word, a mood, a sentence, or a secret. I write something just for you, something soft and strange and real.

You can request:

A letter (to someone/something)

A poem (lyrical, freeform, surreal)

A song fragment (like lyrics or mood sketch)

✨ It’s just $10, and you can order through my Ko-fi

Here's a personal example I did: Letter to future me:

I hope you feel better, I really do… and I hope the decisions I take will lead to the best for you… I hope I'm not committing to a life of darkness, I hope that my confession is not hunger I say "If I make mistakes, or I hurt you, please forgive me as I can't do much to control my impulse"

And I hope you will still make things for your future… Never stop creating… Not even if the spark dies… cause it's true that Now I feel dead but I know that flame burned once and it can burn again And we can get better and we can get back on track… I hope I did it… I hope you are what you wanted now… And I'm sorry if I failed, but I promise I did it for you this time…

Mama, Papa, I'm sorry, but I will not follow your lead I chose my own decision and did what I wanted with it. I know it's hard to get it, but it's not late to get it… I just hope some day you'll find the way to know I did this for myself…

This is not a phase, it's a wave That keeps on moving flooding every single place A wave that holds my future, a wave that holds the truth of… A wave that I created to feel right within my brain.

And I hope you will still make things for your future… Never stop creating… Not even if the spark dies… cause it's true that Now I feel dead but I know that flame burned once and it can burn again And we can get better and we can get back on track… I hope I did it… I hope you are what you wanted now… And I'm sorry if I failed, but I promise I did it for you this time…

I hope you feel better, I really do… and I hope the decisions I take will lead to the best for you… I hope I'm not committing to a life of darkness, I hope that my confession is not hunger and if I say this it's because I miss your silence…