Resisting the bubbling urge to roll them at her, Reggie’s curious eyes follow the path of Andy’s fork towards the charred slab of meat that’s currently rotting untouched on his plate instead, and it’s horrible — like, really fucking bad — but he wants to laugh as it remains wholly unfazed by the action; there’s not even a scrape mark against the blackened, overly crispy skin to show for it. Undoubtedly her worst dish yet, he definitely isn’t lying about that. Though it’s then that he notices the potatoes, and granted, he can’t be sure how they’re supposed to look in comparison — funnily enough, he never actually finds himself coming to the restaurant all that often when there’s someone on shift who can serve him real, edible food — but he knows for certain it’s wrong. They’re severely undercooked, laden with unidentifiable chunks, far too yellow in color and … slimy, somehow.
Probably the closest thing to how he imagines alien brain matter looking like. Or perhaps a sentient creature all on its own. Downright abysmal, whatever it is.
Reggie cringes. What if he stares at it too long and it starts to stare back at him? “Right, yeah,” he replies incredulously. “Because you’ve perfected the, uh — incredibly limited menu you’ve already got, babe.” There’s a moment’s pause before he wags a finger at her and adds, like an afterthought, “But I totally would — eat bugs again, I mean. If that’s a challenge. I’m always down to prove a point.”
As if the likelihood that she’ll take the plate back increases the farther it is away from him, he makes a show of pushing it more towards the middle of the table and sighs. It’s more about the company, he thinks, which is a statement he’s been telling himself as each day passes and each new dish is placed in front of him with the same rancid presentation. There’s no other reason to keep showing up over and over and over again if not for the entertainment of it all, anyway, and the truth is — well. He’s been super fucking bored lately. Like ‘clawing out of his own skin’ levels of boredom. At least coming here, even if it’s bound to get him sick one of these days, is something exciting. At least Andy’s exciting.
On that thought, he wants to laugh again. It’s the perfect answer to the burning question he’s had for weeks — and that’s why her boss hasn’t canned her ages ago for her poor kitchen skills, of course. The feminine wiles or whatever may be entirely lost on him, like she’s said, but excitement? A good little thrill? Entertainment for the masses? That, he gets. As quickly as the realization comes, however, it leaves — he doesn’t want to find any sort of pathway to relate to a man named Dave, much less a sex-blinded man named Dave at that.
“You’re kidding,” he states, leveling Andy with another disbelieving stare. “You’re telling me he hasn’t, like, I don’t know — looked at you properly? How long have you worked here? C’mon.” With a shake of his head, he adjusts in his seat, leans against his elbows on the table. “Anyone within a five mile radius should be able to tell you reek of lesbian. Or, maybe, I guess, disinterest at least — and yet he’s letting you serve goop that my two year old niece can probably cook better all ‘cause he wants to fuck you. That’s vile,” he rambles. Can’t help but admire the deception, though — on Andy’s part. “You ever plan on letting him down?”