Your Friendly Neighborhood Cretan

I'm a McFucking silly goose. Also very yehaw. Now Ravioli Approved! Part of Artemis Offical's Double's forest tribe thing :3 Please ignore spelling errors, i'm a little stupid ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

[ho-ho-homosxual]

Guess it's finally time I make an intro post...

Ok, so:

My name's Mel!

I yap about a lot on here. I'm pretty bad at tagging but the two consecutive ones I remember to use are:

#the watermelon yaps & #quality tumblr bs

Fair Warning! I do tag my posts with warnings most of the time so if you have triggering tags blocked you should be good, but I do post some dark stuff sometimes!

If I forget to put a warning please let me know! Thank you <3

I use Literally any/every pronouns! The more unique the better!!

I've got diagnosed ADHD & Anxiety but i'm also pretty sure i'm autistic so that's something

I'll throw out some art or maybe even writing every once in awhile, but don't count on it.

I love asks! Any asks!

Agnostic. I use "jesus christ" "oh my god" "oh my stars" "oh my ducks" amongst many other things.

I pingpong between swearing like a sailor and using the most nonsensical, whimsical curse-adjacents

I DON'T HAVE A DNI

As long as you don't give me an actual reason to block you / not interact w you, or if you make anyone uncomfy on purpose, you're welcome here.

I'm Anti-Trump and his supporters, as they give me actual reasons to hate them.

I'm also Very Queer. If you've got a problem with that, keep it to yourself. I'm here to have fun, not argue the validity of my existence.

I am not Proship. I am also not Anti-Proship. If you have a problem with that, again, keep it to yourself.

I am however Anti-Censorship. I don't think anyone should be forced to not do / create / express themselves in a way that doesn't harm others.

Wanna argue? The door's that way, pal. I'm here to make friends not foes.

I may misread/ misunderstand what you say. Please be patient and just explain it to me. Thank you.

I like to use tone tags. Sometimes I will ask what tone you mean something in. If that bothers you, don't talk with me. easy as that.

I think that's all. lemme know if I forgot something :]

[chromaticrainarts]

I think this ship (spaceship) is really funny

[ramqiu]

the upgraded xenonite suit was invented shortly after

inspired by this tweet

[jube-art]

next | full tag

A soulsong, a bond in Eridian cultures that tangles together lives and experiences. A person to always watch you sleep.

[amanonthecorner]

I love when fanfic authors are freakishly unhinged. "Yes, hello, I am here to write a heart wrenching story about relationships and mortality. My medium is Ducktales (2017)"

[meme-formats]

hey, do you have that image where two people are making out and theres a third person who looks very tired?

Hi! Thank you so much for the suggestion, I’ve had so much fun seeing these templates. I think you’re talking about this one:

But I feel like I should also bless you with the utter joy that are these ones, because same, lmao:

Hope you’re having a great day! 😘

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 4/?

Bonus:

[minty-mumbles]

Grace, whos voice sounds completely monotone to Eridians: Hello, it's nice to meet you!

Eridians: that’s a weird fucking tone, man

Rocky: That’s just the way he sounds, he has an asshole voice. Grace tell them everything’s okay, command

Grace: Everything is great!

Rocky, unimpressed: Dude

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 5/?

Bonus:

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 1/?

Bonus:

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 2/?

[whotfelsewantedtobelynnyx]

I gotta do this in every new fandom I enter, so…

✨PHM (specifically Stratt’s Vat) INCORRECT QUOTES ✨

*stupid shit my friends and I say edition*

Grace, writing something down: Okay, Ilyukhina wants cocaine for her birthday…

Grace: No one in this family will let me break the law :(

Yáo, rubbing his temples while trying to focus on the road: Put. The pigeon. Back.

Ilyukhina, from the backseat: I’m gonna roll down the window and try to catch a seagull!

Stratt, shrugging: Sometimes you’ve just gotta try it and see what happens.

Leclerc, through tears: You knew what would happen! It blew up!

Stratt: Damn it, can I not say anything with the word straight in it?

Ilyukhina: No! I’m a lesbian with a terrible sense of humor :D

Grace: Imagine the wire dilemma, where you’re trying to figure out which color wire to cut to diffuse the bomb, but you’re completely colorblind.

Stratt: Get someone who isn’t colorblind to cut the wires.

Grace: Like there’s no one else there and they’re on the phone with someone.

Stratt: Objectively, the wire dilemma you’re describing needs someone who knows the ins and outs of the bomb well enough to know which to cut, so they’ll know the position of the wire to cut.

Grace: Can you just let me have fun?

Stratt: No.

Shapiro: Do you ever think about how many songs are secretly about sex?

Grace: Wha- no? But now I am.

Stratt, pointing a threatening finger at Grace and Carl: Do not make more children while I’m out.

*flight crew + Grace, driving back from getting bubble tea*

Grace: *chokes*

Dubois: Are you alright?

Grace: I’m fine, I just choked on a boba. I wasn’t expecting it.

Ilyukhina: How? You are drinking boba tea!

Grace, defensively: Well, you have to suck really hard to get it up!

Dubois: *eyebrow raise*

Shapiro: *giggling*

Grace: Wait- NO!

Shapiro: *more giggling*

Grace: Shut up! God, there’s another one stuck. I’m just gonna-mmm.

Dubois: You’re just going to what?

Grace, reluctantly: I was gonna say suck it up.

Shapiro, fully cracking up by now: You’re making this so easy for me-

Ilyukhina, also grinning: Maybe if you suck on it with your tongue in the way…

Grace: SHUT UP!!!

Ilyukhina, innocently: What? I was just giving detailed explanation of how you suck it.

Shapiro: *wheeze*

Yáo, from the front seat: I’m going to crash this fucking car.

Ilyukhina, to Stratt: I’d jump in front of a gun for you <3

Stratt, with a straight face: Please don’t. I’d move out of the way and you’d just get shot like an idiot.

Ilyukhina, happily singing: We’re going on a trip, in our favorite rocket ship-

Grace, dead serious: I will jump off.

Grace, reading a label: Give 1.5 cap…cap…caplets with breakfast.

Shapiro: Uh, are you having a stroke?

Grace: Usually medicine bottles say capsules OR tablets. This one says caplets. I thought I was going nuts.

Stratt, irritated from a stepladder: You don’t have to be straight, the clock has to be straight.

Grace: Well that’s rude. The clock can be whatever it wants to be.

Ilyukhina, slamming her palms down on the table: LET THE CLOCK LOVE WHO IT WANTS TO LOVE!

Grace: What if rocks are secretly alive and have just been, like, hibernating this whole time?

Dubois: Okay, neither of us is getting any work done right now.

Grace, thoughtfully: Like a really, really long hibernation.

[red-plutoo]

Grace and Rocky incorrect quotes? Question?

__

Grace, after getting a shoe thrown at him for about the 4th time in recent days: hm.

Grace: I mean it proves stratt was right to put us in comas I guess

Rocky: Grace is 🎶🎵🎶ing stupid

Grace: thanks rock.

__

Grace, walking around in a blanket toga (again) :

Rocky: why Grace wear no clothes? Question?

Grace: you don’t wear clothes ever buddy I don’t think it matters

Rocky, hasn’t worn a shirt in 4 years: hm…

__

Grace, on the toilet:

Rocky, from the other end of the ship: STOP 🎶🎵🎶🎵ING SO LOUD

__

Grace, the most aroace autistic man alive, AAA if you will:

Rocky, has no other reference for humanity: how does this species survive???

__

(Just before first contact)

Rocky: hm. What should I wear to make first contact?

Rocky:

Grace, tapping on the xenonite: hello?

Rocky, running to the window butt ass naked out of panic: fuck-

(On the way to Erid)

Grace: and at no point did you consider telling me you were naked?

Rocky, retrieving his clothes from blip-a: we agreed to ignore cultural norms.

Grace: yeah ok fair enough

__

Grace, watching a video of fish in an aquarium: aquarium gravel looks so tasty…

Rocky, basically looking at the equivalent of sperm cells: …

Rocky: Grace is freak.

__

Grace, laying on the floor playing Minecraft: we blew up Antarctica for this

Rocky: the 🎶🎵🎶 is Antarctica? Question?

Grace:

Grace: do you think stratt downloaded a to scale Minecraft map of earth? (She did)

__

Grace: I miss chewing plastic

Grace: all the plastic here is important

Rocky, who just heard “I wanna chew on a dangerous polymer that kills earth wildlife sometimes”: what.

__

Grace, almost getting the ship blown up: aw darn

Rocky: say 🎶🎵🎶 Grace. Say 🎶🎵🎶. Please

__

Grace, talking about his students: I miss my kids

Rocky, talking about his actual children: so do I

__

Grace, thinking about stratt: yknow being someone’s right hand man was like… great, I miss being important

Rocky:

Rocky: how long since last sleep? Question?

__

Grace, singing to himself: California girls were unforgettable-

Rocky, loves human music: DAISY DUKES BIKINIS ON TOP-

Mary: it sounds like you are having an argument-

Grace, chucks a battery at the wall:

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 6/?

Bonus:

[scienceviewscreen]

Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 3/?

Bonus:

[deervsheadlights]

just a regular workplace relationship

[deervsheadlights]

give him a minute