It’s really amazing the physical and emotional boundaries we have an how capable they are of being pushed and manipulated. I sit in wonderment at the places my mind is capable of going. A sense of complacency brings a settled nature to our lives, especially the younger we are.
It seems that NOW we have finally experienced our outer limits, felt the our emotional capabilities and seen the human experience for what it truly is. We scoff at our naive former selves which have become no more than a distant, perhaps fond, perhaps not, memory. “Ha, remember when I believed I was grown up? When I thought that I knew everything?” In an evolving timescape, however, isn’t this always the case? Aren’t we always simply future versions of former selves?
If this is the case, and we are in an ever changing state of evolution, change and challenge, why, then, does time seem to create more stubborn humans? Perhaps the more change a person sees, the more they resist. We get older, and watch everything we know fade away. Buildings get knocked down, people die, we move, have children, and even watch the favorable style of jeans change at an alarming speed. Clinging on to a static vision of ourselves may seem a pillar of stability in troubled times.
But nothing is static, is it? I thought I knew what kind of person I would grow up to be, what my life would be. I thought i knew the kind of pregnancy I would have an how I would feel about it. In the past 9 months, I have watched my body, emotions and mind evolve into something I don’t recognize. Feelings I didn’t know existed, joys and love I didn’t think possible, pain and fear stretch my physical limitations beyond the scope of my thought.
Maybe all we can do is try to accept the changing world around us and a different version of ourselves, and even, embrace it. All things must end, pain included, and the person who emerges from the pain and evolution may be a better version of ourselves if we are lucky and open minded.
