𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐨 𝐒𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫
— — — — — — 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒓 ( 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟏 ) 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏
❛ & they’d all be so disappointed. ❜
❛ Cause who am I if not exploited ? ❜
❛ & I don’t stick up for myself. ❜
❛ & I wish people liked me more. ❜
❛ All I did was try my best. ❜
❛ This the kinda thanks I get ? ❜
❛ But I wish I could disappear. ❜
❛ God, it’s brutal out here. ❜
❛ I only have two real friends. ❜
❛ & lately, I’m a nervous wreck. ❜
❛ I feel like no one wants me. ❜
❛ & I wish I’d done this before. ❜
❛ & they’d all be so disappointed, ‘Cause who am I if not exploited ? ❜
❛ & I’m so tired that I might quit my job, start a new life. ❜
❛ I played dumb, but I always knew. ❜
❛ I kept quiet so I could keep you. ❜
❛ & ain’t it funny how you said you were friends ? ❜
❛ Now it sure as hell don’t look like it. ❜
❛ & I know that you’ll never feel sorry for the way I hurt. ❜
❛ All I did was try my best. ❜
❛ Loved you at your worst, but that didn’t matter. ❜
❛ Guess you didn’t cheat, but you’re still a traitor. ❜
❛ Remember I brought her up & you told me I was paranoid ? ❜
❛ God, I wish that you had thought this through before I went & fell in love with you. ❜
❛ But today, I drove through the suburbs, crying 'cause you weren’t around. ❜
❛ 'Cause how could I ever love someone else ? ❜
❛ But I’ve never felt this way for no one. ❜
❛ How you could be so okay now that I’m gone. ❜
❛ 'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street. ❜
❛ & all my friends are tired of hearing how much I miss you. ❜
❛ I kinda feel sorry for them. ❜
❛ Can’t drive past the places we used to go to. ❜
❛ 'Cause they’ll never know you the way that I do. ❜
❛ I still see your face in the white cars, front yards. ❜
❛ But I still fuckin’ love you. ❜
❛ You said forever, now I drive alone past your street. ❜
1 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒅, 3 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌
❛ Called you on the phone today just to ask you how you were. ❜
❛ All I did was speak normally. ❜
❛ & I don’t stick up for myself. ❜
❛ Somehow, I still struck a nerve. ❜
❛ You got me fucked up in the head. ❜
❛ I hate that I give you power over that kinda stuff. ❜
❛ I’m the love of your life until I make you mad. ❜
❛ It’s always one step forward and three steps back. ❜
❛ Do you love me, want me, hate me ? ❜
❛ & lately, I’m a nervous wreck. ❜
❛ No, I don’t understand. ❜
❛ & maybe in some masochistic way I kind of find it all exciting. ❜
❛ Like, which lover will I get today ? ❜
❛ Will you walk me to the door or send me home crying ? ❜
❛ So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too ? ❜
❛ That was our place, I found it first. ❜
❛ & I don’t stick up for myself. ❜
❛ I made the jokes you tell to her when she’s with you. ❜
❛ Do you get déjà vu when she’s with you ? ❜
❛ ’Cause let’s be honest, we kinda do sound the same. ❜
❛ I hate to think that I was just your type. ❜
❛ Now I bet you even tell her how you love her in between the chorus and the verse. ❜
❛ A different girl now, but there’s nothing new. ❜
❛ I know you get déjà vu. ❜
❛ Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world ? ❜
❛ Good for you, I guess that you’ve been workin’ on yourself. ❜
❛ I guess that therapist I found for you, she really helped. ❜
❛ Now you can be a better man for your brand new girl. ❜
❛ You look happy and healthy, not me, if you ever cared to ask. ❜
❛ You’re doin’ great out there without me, baby. ❜
❛ God, I wish that I could do that. ❜
❛ But you’re so unaffected, I really don’t get it. ❜
❛ But I guess good for you. ❜
❛ I guess you’re gettin’ everything you want. ❜
❛ It’s like you never even met me. ❜
❛ Remember when you swore to God I was the only person who ever got you ? ❜
❛ Well, screw that, and screw you. ❜
❛ It’s like we never even happened. ❜
❛ You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do. ❜
❛ Maybe I’m too emotional. ❜
❛ Your apathy’s like a wound in salt. ❜
❛ Or maybe you never cared at all. ❜
❛ Tried so hard to be everything that you liked just for you to say you’re not the compliment type. ❜
❛ Stupid, emotional, obsessive little me. ❜
❛ You found someonе more exciting. ❜
❛ The nеxt second, you were gone. ❜
❛ All I ever wanted was to be enough for you. ❜
❛ You left me there cryin’, wonderin’ what I did wrong. ❜
❛ You always say I’m never satisfied, but I don’t think that’s true. ❜
❛ & maybe I’m just not as interesting as the girls you had before. ❜
❛ But God, you couldn’t have cared less about someone who loved you more. ❜
❛ I’d say you broke my heart but you broke much more than that. ❜
❛ Now I don’t want your sympathy. ❜
❛ I just want myself back. ❜
❛ Don’t you think I loved you too much to think I deserve nothing ? ❜
❛ Don’t you think I loved you too much to be used & discarded ? ❜
❛ But don’t tell me you’re sorry. ❜
❛ Feel sorry for yourself. ❜
❛ Your friends are mine, you know I know. ❜
❛ I thought my heart was detached from all the sunlight of our past. ❜
❛ Does she mean you forgot about me ? ❜
❛ I hope you’re happy, but not like how you were with me ❜
❛ I’m selfish, I know, I can’t let you go. ❜
❛ So find someone great, but don’t find no one better. ❜
❛ I hope you’re happy, but don’t be happier. ❜
❛ An eternal love bullshit you know you’ll never mean. ❜
❛ Remember when I believed you meant it when you said it first to me ? ❜
❛ I wish you all the best, really. ❜
❛ Say you love her, baby. Just not like you loved me. ❜
❛ & think of me fondly when your hands are on her. ❜
❛ I kinda wanna throw my phone across the room. ❜
❛ But it feels like that weight is on my back & I can’t let it go. ❜
❛ I think I think too much. ❜
❛ I’m happy for them, but then again, I’m not. ❜
❛ I’m so sick of myself. ❜
❛ Oh God, I sound crazy. ❜
❛ Their win is not my loss. ❜
❛ I know it’s true, but I can’t help gettin’ caught up in it all. ❜
❛ I wanna be you so bad and I don’t even know you. ❜
❛ All I see is what I should be. ❜
❛ Know that I loved you so bad. ❜
❛ I let you treat me like that. ❜
❛ I was your willing accomplice, honey & I watched as you fled the scene. ❜
❛ The things I did just so I could call you mine. ❜
❛ One heart broke, four hands bloody. ❜
❛ Well, I hope I was your favorite crime. ❜
❛ You used me as an alibi. ❜
❛ I wondеr if you’re around cause you know that I’d do it all again. ❜
❛ It’s bittersweet to think about the damage that we’d do. ❜
❛ I say that I hate you with a smile on my face. ❜
❛ 'Cause, baby, you were mine. ❜
❛ Oh, look what we became. ❜
❛ & somehow, we fell out of touch. ❜
❛ Don’t know if I’ll see you again someday but if you’re out there, I hope that you’re okay. ❜
❛ She couldn’t wait to go to college. ❜
❛ Does she know how proud I am she was created with the courage to unlearn all of their hatred ? ❜
❛ I miss you & I hope that you’re okay. ❜
❛ Nothing’s forever, nothing is as good as it seems. ❜
❛ God, I hope that you’re happier today. ❜