honey

dyslexic lesbian im not a writer by any means so if i am writing its cause no one else is

[honeysapphic]

Mood Board for...

Pregnant reader in

Im scared baby.

Pt1 Pt2 Pt3 Pt4 Pt5 Pt6

Pt7 Pt8 Pt9 Pt10 Pt11 Pt12 Pt13 Pt14

I cant wait to go in depth with her. She so cute.

think yall will like her or I hope you do. Cassie doesnt need a mood board bc im keeping her as close to how she is in the show as I can. Also when I respond to questions and stuff im gonna refer to her as reader instead of y/n. In the story ill use y/n and I/n tho.

Little bit abt reader:

Shes a 29 year old R2.

She lives alone in a pretty nice apartment.

She quite literally has no friends.

She doesnt speak to her parents and if she does its mainly against her will.

She moved out young and started working part times to put herself through med school.

She likes to observe instead of speak which is why the staff only know so much about her. And thats also why shes so good at what she does.

Shes a very soft spoken girl.

She zones out very often (you'll see this in up coming parts)

She puts alot of thought into her actions which isnt always a good thing.

She doesnt know how to accept things (which you've seen a bit of when Cassie is offering her friendship and help.)

She moved states so she truly is all alone and all she has is work and her baby.

She actually likes nearly everyone on staff. Especially the med students and mel. She likes that they are interesting and that she has new people to observe. (Trinity noticed that she stares at them alot which is why she called her creepy during part 3)

Shes very emotional but hides it well (due to her pregnancy thats not going too well which shes irritated by but shes Iwk okay with it bc Cassie rubs her back everytime she cries)

(She also loves women. Like ALOT. But we will be getting into this later just pump your breaks fox and friends.)

[honeysapphic]

girl we miss u and cassie 💔💔 hope ur doing well!

Im so sorry chat I lwk got burnt out and havent even been on tumblr.

Give me two weeks and I got yall. I wanted to do a few more chapters but got side tracked by life

[honeysapphic]

Im scared baby chp 14

IM SORRY! IM BACK I SWEAR!! I ADDED LENGTH TO THIS ONE TO MAKE UP FOR MY ABSENCE

Masterlist

Cassie’s room was dim in the way late afternoons always seemed to be in her apartment. Dana had come over a few hours ago to drop Mila off with you at Cassies apartment. Warm light spilled through the curtains in uneven stripes, catching on the abandoned takeout containers sitting on the dresser and the half folded laundry at the foot of the bed.

The soft hum of traffic outside mixed with the faint sound of Mila’s white noise machine down the hall in Harrisons bedroom. It made everything feel strangely intimate.

Safe.

Safer than the couch had earlier when you cracked yourself open and told Cassie of your past but now you two were in her bed.

Cassie laid stretched out on her stomach beside you, chin propped up against her forearm and pillow as she watched you carefully. Not in a pressuring way. Never in a pressuring way. Just attentive. Like she was trying to memorize every expression that crossed your face before you could hide it from her.

You sat against the headboard with your knees bent slightly, fingers twisting nervously in the sleeve of your hoodie.

“I do want this with you, Cass,” you finally whispered.

Your voice was so quiet she almost thought she imagined it.

Cassie’s eyes softened immediately.

But you still couldn’t look at her.

Your gaze stayed glued somewhere near the blankets pooled around your lap, your breathing uneven like you were bracing for impact.

“But…” Your throat tightened. “I can’t have this with you without telling you what I know I need to.”

Cassie shifted slightly, slow enough not to startle you. One hand slid across the comforter until her fingers brushed yours.

“You don’t have to rush. You did so good earlier,” she murmured.

You swallowed hard.

Her fingers curled gently around your hand before bringing it to her lips. The kiss she pressed to your knuckles was absentminded. Tender. Like affection came naturally to her when it came to you.

“We have all day and all night,” she reassured softly. “I’m listening.”

That finally made you look at her.

Just for a second.

Your eyes scanned her face carefully, almost suspiciously, like you were waiting to find hesitation hidden somewhere inside her expression. Regret. Doubt. Discomfort.

But Cassie only looked patient.

Open.

So painfully open it made your chest ache.

“I’m bad at receiving care,” you admitted quietly. “Any kind of care.”

Cassie stayed silent, letting you keep going.

“And I know it’s a bad habit but…” You laughed nervously under your breath. “It’s like if I accept someone taking care of me, then I’m also accepting that I’m a burden to them.”

The words came out rushed at the end, like you hated hearing them aloud.

Cassie’s brows pulled together instantly.

“Y/n—”

“And I don’t want to feel like that anymore,” you continued quickly, your voice shakier now. “I really don’t. During the pregnancy and after the baby shower I actually started working on it. Like genuinely trying. I was talking more, letting people help me with things, letting myself… be around everyone.”

You exhaled hard through your nose.

“But then my parents showed up at the hospital and it just—” You shook your head, frustrated tears already stinging your eyes. “It felt like all the progress I made got blown up by like… a million childhood trauma bombs.”

Cassie blinked at you.

Then, despite herself, she snorted.

“Trauma bombs?” she repeated, trying not to smile.

You groaned immediately, hiding your face in embarrassment.

“I don’t know.”

“No, no.” Cassie laughed softly now, warm and breathy. “That was actually a pretty accurate description.”

Your own laugh slipped out quietly, fragile but real.

The tension eased just enough for you to breathe again.

Cassie reached over then, resting her hand carefully against your thigh. Her thumb stroked back and forth slowly through the fabric of your sweatpants.

Your eyes flickered down to her hand automatically before lifting back to her face.

“You’ve done so good though,” she said softly.

You shook your head immediately.

“No—”

“Yes.” Her tone turned firmer. “I mean it.”

The seriousness in her voice made you still.

“You aren’t the same woman that walked into the ER a few years ago avoiding eye contact with literally everybody.” Her lips twitched slightly. “Do you know how intimidating you were?”

Your nose scrunched faintly. “I was not intimidating.”

“Baby, you glared at Abbott for offering you a granola bar.”

“He interrupted my charting.”

Cassie laughed quietly. “Exactly.”

You tried not to smile.

“But that’s my point.” Her voice softened again. “There was a time where none of us really knew you. We knew your work. Your intelligence. Your skill. We knew you were brilliant and scary and weirdly good at trauma procedures—”

“Weirdly?”

“You’re like a machine in the trauma bay,” she defended.

You rolled your eyes softly.

“But now…” Cassie continued, her gaze growing gentler.

“Now everyone knows you. The real you. The one that stays late to help the nurses. The one that cries over NICU babies. The one that keeps snacks in her locker for med students because she remembers what it felt like to forget to eat during shifts.”

Your throat tightened painfully.

“And we love you,” she said quietly.

“I love you, Y/n.”

The words hit you so suddenly your breath caught.

Your entire body went still.

Cassie watched it happen in real time. The slight widening of your eyes. The way your lips parted soundlessly. The way you looked almost overwhelmed by the confession.

“…Love?” you whispered.

Barely audible.

Cassie nodded without hesitation.

“You’re unlike anyone I’ve ever met.” Her voice stayed calm, steady, certain. “You’re gorgeous, you’re kind, you’re funny in that really dry way that catches me off guard every single time, you’re smart as hell, you’re an incredible doctor—”

“It’s barely been two months,” you interrupted weakly.

Cassie frowned slightly.

“What?”

“Since Mila was born.”

Understanding softened her features instantly.

“Oh.” She moved closer. “Baby.”

You looked embarrassed suddenly, like you regretted saying it at all.

“You gave birth less than two months ago,” Cassie continued gently, “but you were being a mother long before that.”

You stared at her quietly.

“You baby proofed the apartment before you were even showing. You had pediatric appointments scheduled months ahead of time. You researched car seats like your life depended on it.” She smiled softly. “You bought tiny socks and cried about them for twenty minutes.”

“They were really small.”

“I know.” She grinned. “And you wrote in that journal constantly.”

Your expression changed immediately.

“…How did you know about the journal?”

Cassie’s smile softened into something fonder.

“You used to sit in the nursery late at night writing.”

Your eyes widened.

“You saw that?”

—

One night, when Cassie had stayed over while Harrison was spending the weekend at Chad’s, she’d woken up in the middle of the night to an empty bed.

At first she thought you were in the bathroom.

She’d called your name softly, voice still thick with sleep, but there was no answer.

The bathroom light was off.

That was when she noticed the faint glow spilling from the cracked nursery door.

Cassie remembered padding quietly down the hallway, and finding you curled into the rocking chair by the window with one of the quilts youd brought draped over your legs.

The room had looked soft around you.

Moonlight lit the edges of your face while your hand moved quickly across the pages of a worn brown leather journal balanced against your thigh. Every now and then you’d pause to think, absently rubbing your palm over your stomach before writing again.

You looked so focused.

So full of love already.

Cassie remembered leaning quietly against the doorway just watching you for a moment longer than she probably should have.

Admiring you.

The curve of your stomach beneath one of her old t-shirts.

The sleepy crease between your brows.

The gentle sway of the rocking chair.

The way you looked completely consumed by the tiny life growing inside you.

Cassie had almost interrupted you.

Almost.

But something about the moment felt private in a sacred kind of way.

So instead she’d gone back to bed and pretended she hadn’t seen anything at all.

After that, though, she noticed the journal everywhere.

At the kitchen table while you drank tea.

Balanced beside patient charts during slower shifts.

Tucked beside you on the couch.

Held against your chest before bed.

She never asked about it.

Because she figured whatever was written inside belonged only to you.

—

“Yeah,” Cassie said softly now. “I saw.”

You looked stunned.

“I didn’t read it,” she added quickly. “I swear.”

“I know.” Your voice came out quieter than before.

Cassie’s thumb brushed gently against your thigh again.

“And I know how much being a good mom means to you,” she said. “So when I say you already are one, I need you to believe me.”

Emotion climbed painfully into your throat.

“And coming from a mediocre mom,” Cassie joked lightly, “you’re doing pretty well, baby.”

You laughed wetly through the tears gathering in your eyes.

“I mean it.” Her smile softened again. “You’re amazing with Harrison too. That kid adores you.”

“He’s easy to love.”

“Still.” Cassie grinned. “I’m pretty sure he likes your house more than Chad’s and mine combined.”

That pulled a real smile from you.

The kind that made Cassie feel warm all over.

Silence settled between you after that.

Not awkward.

Just full.

You sniffled quietly before whispering, “I love you too.”

Cassie’s expression changed instantly.

Like something inside her cracked open.

“A lot,” you admitted shakily. “I think I always had like… a work crush on you.”

Cassie barked out a laugh.

“A work crush?”

“Shut up.” You laughed embarrassedly. “I wasn’t really into dating. More of a one night stand to release tension kind of person.”

Cassie raised a brow immediately.

“Oh? So what, you wanted me to be a one night stand?”

“God, no.” Your answer came so fast it made her grin. “No, I wanted more.”

The honesty in your voice made her chest tighten.

“And I still want more,” you whispered. “So much more with you.”

Cassie sat up then, slowly moving until she was directly in front of you.

Close enough that your knees brushed hers.

You watched her carefully, your breathing already beginning to change.

“I’m fucked up, Cass,” you admitted suddenly, voice trembling again. “And I don’t want to ruin this. Or ruin things for the baby or Harrison.”

Cassie’s face softened immediately.

“You have shitty parents,” she said gently. “And I’m a recovering addict.”

You looked down.

“But we also have two amazing kids,” she continued. “And we’re both good doctors. And you—” Her fingers tilted your chin upward carefully. “You are not broken.”

Your eyes shimmered.

“It genuinely hurts me,” she confessed quietly, “when you disappear back into the version of yourself the world forced you to become.”

Your breathing stuttered.

“Because you don’t live there anymore.” Her forehead nearly touched yours now. “You’re here. With me. With Mila. With your friends. With us.”

The word us nearly undid you.

“I really like you, Cassie McKay,” you whispered.

You nodded shakily.

“And I love you, Y/n L/n.”

Cassie smiled instantly.

The weight in your chest finally cracked apart after that.

Not all at once.

But enough to breathe.

Enough to lean closer without fear swallowing you whole.

You both stayed there staring at each other for a long moment, the air between you growing heavier by the second.

Your eyes dropped to her mouth unconsciously.

Cassie noticed immediately.

A tiny smirk tugged at the corner of her lips as she watched the need slowly melt into your expression.

“What?” she whispered teasingly.

“Hm?” Your voice sounded breathless.

Her eyes darkened slightly.

“What do you want?”

The question shattered whatever restraint you had left.

You grabbed the front of her shirt and kissed her hard.

Cassie made a soft surprised sound against your lips before immediately kissing you back, one hand sliding into your hair as her other instinctively landed on your waist when you climbed into her lap, the tiny whimper that left you as she tightened her hold on your hair went straight to her head.

“Jesus,” she breathed against your mouth.

You kissed her like you were starving for it.

Messy and needy and completely overwhelmed with emotion.

Cassie tried to keep up, kissing you back hard for a few seconds before she finally pulled away to catch her breath, chest rising sharply.

But the second she moved back, you chased after her immediately with a frustrated sound, trying to reconnect your lips.

Cassie laughed softly under her breath, catching your face gently before you could.

“Hey, hey,” she murmured, trying to pull your attention back to her.

Your breathing was shaky.

Fast.

“Please,” you begged quietly.

The desperation written across your face made something in Cassie’s chest twist painfully.

You looked completely unraveled.

Flushed cheeks. Swollen lips. Wide eyes fixed on hers like she was the only thing grounding you to the earth right now.

Cassie swore softly beneath her breath.

“Fuck,” she whispered, almost more to herself than to you. “Do you know what you look like right now?”

“Cass,” you whined, trying to lean in again.

The sound nearly destroyed her composure.

Still, she forced herself to stay steady, one hand sliding up to hold your jaw carefully so you’d focus on her.

“You wanna do this,” she said softly, voice lower now, “you gotta stay quiet so we don’t wake the baby.”

That immediately grounded you a little.

Your eyes flickered toward the hallway for half a second before landing back on her face.

You nodded quickly.

Cassie’s expression softened at how hard you were trying.

“There she is,” she teased gently. “Thought I lost you for a second.”

You huffed out a breathless little laugh, embarrassed, before grabbing lightly at the front of her shirt again.

“C’mere,” you whispered.

Cassie smiled helplessly at that.

Then she took your face in both hands and kissed you deeply, guiding you backward against the mattress carefully so you wouldn’t fall awkwardly onto the pillows.

The kiss was slower this time.

Still intense.

Still emotional.

But softer around the edges.

Cassie kissed you like she was trying to reassure you of every single thing she’d said moments before. One hand stayed cradling your jaw while the other rubbed slowly along your side, grounding you every time your breathing hitched.

And when you made another tiny sound against her lips, she couldn’t help smiling into the kiss.

“So needy,” she whispered teasingly.

Your face immediately burned.

“Shut up.”

Cassie laughed quietly, forehead dropping against yours for a moment.

“Can’t,” she murmured. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

[honeysapphic]

Little delay in chapters someone brought g^ns to school and I had to leave my purse with all my notes in it on campus🧍

Ill try again Monday 💔

[honeysapphic]

Im scared baby. Chp 13

Cw: implied homophobia, implied su1c1dal thoughts, implied emotional ab*se.

Masterlist

Once you and Cassie finally settled on opposite ends of the couch, the silence didn’t feel empty—it felt heavy. Like something was sitting between you, waiting to be named.

Cassie noticed it immediately.

She leaned back slightly, one arm resting along the back of the couch, her body turned toward you even if there was space between you.

“How’s Mila?” she asked softly.

Her voice was careful. Gentle in that way she only used when she knew you were holding something in.

You glanced up at her for a second before looking back down at your hands.

“She’s good… I gave her to Dana for the day.” A small smile tugged at your lips. “But something tells me that woman might lock me out of my own house if I come back anytime soon.”

Cassie huffed out a quiet laugh, the sound warm and real, like she’d been waiting to hear you joke again.

“Wouldn’t put it past her,” she said, shaking her head slightly.

Your smile lingered for half a second… then faded.

“She wants me to fix this.” You gestured vaguely between the two of you, your hand dropping back into your lap. “And I want to… but it’s hard because I don’t—” you swallowed, your voice catching, “I don’t know how. Or… I guess why exactly I broke it.”

You couldn’t look at her.

Instead, your fingers became your focus—picking, fidgeting, anything to avoid her eyes.

Cassie didn’t rush you.

She just watched.

Watched the way your shoulders curled in, the way your breathing shifted, the way you made yourself smaller when you felt exposed.

“It’s not broken,” she said finally.

Her voice was firm—but still soft.

You stilled.

“I just…” she exhaled slowly, choosing her words carefully, “I want to know you. All of you.”

That made you look up.

Your eyes searched her face, scanning for doubt, hesitation—anything that would let you dismiss what she just said.

But there was nothing.

Just her.

“…I don’t know if it can handle that,” you admitted quietly, your throat tightening.

Cassie’s expression softened even more, if that was possible.

“You’re stronger than you think, y/n.”

The way she said your name so low, so steady, and just so sure. It made something in your chest ache.

Silence settled again.

But this time, it wasn’t as suffocating.

It felt… open.

Like maybe you could step into it.

“…I’ve—” your voice faltered, and you had to start again, “I’ve been avoiding my parents ever since I found out I was pregnant.”

Cassie didn’t interrupt.

But you saw it—the slight widening of her eyes, the shift in her posture.

She was listening. Fully.

"And i didnt really talk to them that much before hand, but i did talk to them enough," you tried to save yourself.

“I…” you let out a shaky breath, your gaze drifting past her, toward the window behind her like you weren’t really in the room anymore. “They have these weird rules and morals that they only ever applied to me.”

Your fingers twisted together tighter.

“I put up with it for a while, you know? I was a kid. I didn’t really question it.” A bitter huff left your lips. “But when I turned fifteen it was like… I don’t know… like something in me woke up.”

Cassie leaned forward just slightly.

“Like I was walking toward a cliff I couldn’t fully see yet… but I knew it was there.”

Her chest tightened at the way you said that.

Quiet. Certain. Like you’d lived it over and over again.

“When I was sixteen…” your jaw clenched, “I kissed a girl.”

You let out a breath that almost sounded like a laugh—but there was no humor in it.

“And my parents found out. Not because I told them. Of course not.” Your lips pressed into a thin line. “She told her friends, one of them told their mom… and it just kept going until it got back to mine.”

Cassie’s hands curled slightly against her knees.

“And they gave me a deadline,” you continued, your voice sharpening. “Get married at eighteen… or get out.”

The words hung in the air.

Heavy.

“But the worst part?” You finally looked at Cassie again, your eyes burning. “I wasn’t surprised.”

That hit her.

Hard.

“I mean, my siblings are all successful,” you said, the word dripping with bitterness. “My brothers have well-paying jobs, got married young, have kids… they fit perfectly.”

Your laugh this time was hollow.

“And then there’s me. The youngest. The only girl.”

Your voice dropped.

“They treated me like I was supposed to be the perfect bride my entire life.”

Cassie’s jaw tightened.

“I couldn’t play sports. Couldn’t go out with friends. Couldn’t have ‘boy hobbies.’” You made air quotes, your expression twisting. “Everything I did had to fit into this… mold.”

You paused, your chest rising and falling a little faster.

“So when I told them I wanted to be a doctor…” your voice cracked slightly, “they laughed.”

Cassie’s heart dropped.

“I remember that night so clearly,” you whispered. “I told them I got into a medical program in eighth grade. Something that would help me all through high school and—”

You swallowed hard.

“They laughed.”

The venom in your voice made Cassie go still.

Like you were right back there.

Like you never really left.

“It’s not a joke.”

The words left her before she could even think about them.

Your head snapped up, eyes locking onto hers—sharp, intense, almost defensive.

For a second, it looked like you might argue.

But then something in your expression softened.

“I know,” you said quietly.

Cassie gave you a small, steady smile… but her eyes dropped when she noticed you rubbing your arms, your legs pulled in slightly.

Without saying anything, she stood.

“Where are you—”

“You’re cold,” she interrupted gently. “Give me a second, baby.”

The word slipped out naturally.

You watched her disappear down the hall, your chest tightening at how easily she could read you.

When she came back, she had a blanket draped over her arm.

She didn’t just hand it to you.

She sat down, closer this time, and gently lifted your legs into her lap.

The movement was slow, giving you time to pull away if you wanted to.

You didn’t.

She draped the blanket over you both, her hand settling lightly on your calf, her thumb brushing small, absent circles against your skin.

“Thank you,” you murmured.

“Keep talking, baby,” she said softly, leaning back but keeping you right where you were. “I’m listening.”

It took you a second.

Cassie noticed how your eyes drifted again—to that same spot past her.

Like that’s where your past lived.

“You know… they used to make me do pageants,” you said quietly.

Cassie’s brows furrowed slightly.

“My mom thought it would teach me what ‘being beautiful’ meant.” You let out a small, humorless laugh. “I had to be elegant. Well-mannered. Educated—but not too educated.”

Her hand stilled for a second.

“God forbid I intimidated a man,” you added, your tone sharp.

Cassie’s jaw tightened again.

“And when I didn’t stop pushing to be a doctor… they changed tactics.” Your fingers clenched slightly in the blanket. “They acted like they were easing up. Like they were finally giving me space.”

You went quiet for a second.

"Like they were finally accepting me..."

You shook your head.

“But really, they were just trying to pull me back in.”

Cassie’s hand started moving again, grounding you.

“They started setting me up on dates. Especially after the… kissing thing.” You grimaced. “I always skipped them. Lied and said I went.”

A small breath left you.

“And when I turned eighteen… they followed through. They kicked me out.”

Cassie’s grip tightened just slightly.

“But I was ready,” you said quickly, like you needed her to know that part. “I’d been working, tutoring… saving. I got a small apartment. Put myself through school.”

There was a flicker of pride in your voice.

But it didn’t last.

“I couldn’t afford to move far though.” Your gaze dropped. “So they’d show up. Unannounced.”

Cassie’s expression darkened.

“And the worst part is…” your voice cracked, “a part of me still wanted them.”

A tear slipped down your cheek.

You wiped it quickly, letting out a small, embarrassed laugh as you turned your face away.

“Sorry, I don’t kn—”

“Don’t apologize.”

Cassie’s voice was firm enough to stop you.

You looked at her, startled.

Your eyes were red now, glossy, vulnerable in a way you didn’t let people see.

“You’ve kept this inside for so long,” she said, her voice softer now but no less serious. “You didn’t have anyone to listen.”

Your throat tightened again.

“You’re allowed to be angry. And sad. And confused. And even… relieved.” Her gaze didn’t waver. “But you don’t get to apologize to me for feeling any of it.”

The words hit deep.

You nodded slowly, trying to pull yourself back together.

“I paid for my first few years of school myself,” you continued, your voice quieter now. “Then I got a scholarship for Pittsburgh.”

Cassie felt a small sense of relief at that.

“That was my out,” you said. “My way of finally escaping all of it.”

Your fingers tightened in the blanket again.

“And even up until the day I left… they were still trying to convince me to stay. To give it all up. And i couldnt. I wouldnt.”

Your voice broke.

“Because I…” you covered your face with your hands, your shoulders trembling slightly.

Cassie’s hand moved gently up your leg, grounding, steady.

“You what, baby?” she asked softly.

You dropped your hands slowly, tears slipping freely now as you held her gaze.

"I wouldve died, Cassie."

Her heart stopped.

“I wouldve finally walked off that cliff.”

The room went still.

For a second, her hand froze.

The weight of your words crashing into her.

But then she moved again—gentler this time, more deliberate, like she was afraid you might disappear if she didn’t keep touching you.

“And I really wished I had a relationship with my brothers,” you continued through your tears. “Maybe if my parents were different, I would have.”

Your voice hardened slightly.

“But they weren’t. And my brothers… they saw me the same way.”

Cassie’s jaw clenched.

“I wasn’t their sister unless I fit the role.” You let out a shaky breath. “They got the parents I wanted… just because they were born male.”

You wiped your face again, exhausted.

“I don’t even know how they found the hospital,” you added. “You know they’ve been texting me ever since.”

Cassie nodded slowly.

“That day was a lot…” she admitted, her voice tightening slightly. “For all of us.”

Her eyes flicked to you, softer now.

“But you’re okay. And the baby’s okay.” Her hand squeezed your leg gently. “That’s what matters.”

You nodded.

“I have to tell them,” you said after a moment. “They want to meet her… but I can’t.”

“You don’t have to—”

“I do.”

Your voice was stronger now.

You sat up a little straighter.

“I have to face them. Show them I became a mother on my terms.” Your eyes burned with something fierce.

“Show them I achieved my dreams… and had my baby… without their control. Without their… fantasy of me being someone’s wife. Without being a mans, wife.”

Cassie watched you carefully.

There was something different now.

Stronger.

“I did this myself,” you said, your voice softening as a small smile broke through.

“I got pregnant on my terms.”

Your eyes filled—but this time it wasn’t just pain.

“And she’s… she’s beautiful.”

The warmth in your voice made Cassie’s chest tighten.

“She is,” she said quietly.

But the way she was looking at you…

Soft.

Full.

Like you were something fragile and incredible all at once.

And for some reason, in that moment...

It didn’t feel like she was talking about Mila.

Next part

[sapphicway]

[honeysapphic]

How i look writing and editing bc i refuse to wear my glasses.

Yall got chapters and smut-shots coming your way trust

[honeysapphic]

Hi sweets! The last few days have been a wee bit hectic with work and school but ill get up to uploads this weekend, pink promise!

Posting both 13 & 14 🤍🤍

Masterlist

[inbred-eater]

baby daddy & baby mama in a picture together………

hold on I’m squi-[GUNSHOTS]

[78ffahrenheit]

i've made like 700 versions of this

[honeysapphic]

write the subtop mckay you wish to see in the world

I would but it doesnt give the same feeling since ik what's gonna happen bc i wrote it 💔

[honeysapphic]

Ill never get over this photo. Her cute little puppy face UGHHH! Im inlove I fear.

Please write more subtop mckay bs please. The lack of it kills me

[womenlovee]

yall don’t get how much i just salivated

[elliskies]

i wanna say something so nasty

[honeysapphic]

I need that mcdick.

[honeysapphic]

Youre not my type.

One-shot.

Cw: younger!reader, lwk loser lesbian reader, touch starved Cassie, sesbian lex 😛, power bottom! Cassie, sub top! Reader

It wasn’t supposed to go anywhere.

That was the agreement—at least the one Cassie made out loud.

One date. That’s it.

Clean. Simple. Controlled.

Except nothing about you felt controlled.

-

It started with a hallway.

Cassie McKay was standing at the nurse’s station, flipping through something on a chart like she hadn’t been on her feet for hours already. Calm voice. Focused eyes. That steady “I’ve got this” energy that made people trust her instantly.

You were leaning against the counter pretending you had a reason to be there.

You didn’t.

You were just watching her talk.

She mentioned her divorce casually—like it was something she’d already filed away and locked.

“I haven’t really dated since then,” she said, almost offhand. “Just haven’t had the time or interest, I guess.”

You didn’t think.

You just said it.

“You should go out with me.”

Cassie stopped.

Not dramatically. Not offended.

Just… paused like her brain needed to double-check what she heard.

She turned her head slowly. “I’m sorry?”

You repeated it, a little less confident now that it was in the air. “Go out with me. Like a date.”

A beat.

Then Cassie let out a short, quiet laugh—surprised more than amused.

“You’re serious.”

“Yeah,” you said quickly, then softened it. “I mean… yes.”

Her eyes scanned you now, slower. Actually looking.

“You’re younger than me,” she said carefully.

You shrugged, but it didn’t come out as smooth as you wanted. “So?”

Cassie tilted her head slightly. “So that matters to some people.”

“It doesn’t have to matter to you,” you said.

That landed differently.

You saw it in her face first—the flicker of hesitation. Not rejection. Not interest. Just… consideration.

Then she sighed.

“You’re not my type,” she said gently, like she was trying to let you down without hurting you.

Your face changed before you could stop it.

Just a flicker.

Cassie noticed immediately.

Of course she did.

You laughed lightly to cover it. “Right. Got it. Makes sense.”

Then, a beat later, you added, quieter, "I didnt really think you liked women, so that was kinda stupid..."

Cassie blinked.

Once.

Twice.

Then she gave you a look like she was deciding how honest she wanted to be.

“I do,” she said simply.

That made you stop.

“And you are,” she added after a pause, “very attractive and that’s not the issue.”

Your breath caught a little at that, even though you tried to act normal about it.

Cassie saw that too.

She always saw everything.

“But,” she continued, voice steady again, “you’re younger. And I don’t think—”

“One date,” you interrupted.

Cassie paused again.

“What?”

“One date,” you repeated, quieter but steadier this time. “That’s it. If it’s weird, we stop. No pressure after that.”

Silence.

Long enough that your confidence started to crack at the edges.

Cassie studied you like she was reading something under your words.

“You’re persistent,” she said finally.

You shrugged. “I’ve been called worse.”

That got a small breath of a laugh from her.

Then she exhaled.

“Fine,” she said.

Your eyes widened slightly.

Cassie held up a finger immediately. “One date. That’s it.”

You nodded fast. “One. Got it.”

“And I pick the place,” she added.

“That feels like a trap.”

“It’s not a trap,” she said calmly.

“…It feels like one.”

Cassie’s mouth twitched. “Good.”

One date turned into another.

Then another.

Because Cassie kept showing up, asking if you were free and like the smitten loser you were you always said yes.

Getting each other coffee during shifts.

Dinners after work that were “just easier than going home.”

A walk that somehow always lasted longer than planned.

“You always this available?” she asked once, watching you wait for her infront of the hospital exit.

“You always this avoidant?” you shot back immediately.

Cassie huffed a quiet laugh as she grabbed her car keys from her pocket. “Fair.”

-

That became the pattern.

The night she came over without calling first changed something.

She showed up at your door with takeout, hair slightly messy, expression tired but softer than usual.

“I didn’t feel like going home,” she said simply.

You stepped aside. “So you came here instead?”

Cassie lifted the bag slightly. “You’ve got all the subscriptions.”

You narrowed your eyes. “That’s not an answer.”

“It is,” she said, walking in anyway.

Like it was normal now.

Like her being in your home had always been normal.

-

Later, you were both in your room.

Lights low. Movie playing that neither of you were actually watching.

Cassie had kicked her shoes off and stretched out a little on your bed like she belonged there more than she probably meant to.

You, meanwhile, were failing to look anywhere except her.

The way she laughed under her breath at something on screen.

The way she tucked her hair back without thinking.

The way her fingers tapped lightly against the blanket when she was relaxed.

Cassie turned her head.

Caught you immediately.

“What?” she asked.

You blinked. “What?”

She narrowed her eyes slightly. “You’re doing it again.”

“Doing what?”

“That thing where you look like your brain stopped loading halfway through a thought.”

You let out a short laugh. “That’s not a thing.”

“It is with you.”

You opened your mouth to argue—but didn’t.

Because she was still watching you.

Not teasing now.

Just… noticing.

Cassie shifted slightly. “You want something.”

Not a question.

Your throat went dry instantly.

Your eyes flicked down to her lips before coming back to her hazel eyes.

Cassie saw it all.

Of course she did.

A pause.

Then she said, softer, “You don’t have to hide it like it’s a problem.”

That made your chest tighten in a way you didn’t expect.

You swallowed. “It’s not a problem.”

Cassie held your gaze.

Long enough that the room felt quieter than it should’ve.

Then she gave a small, almost reluctant smile.

“…Good,” she said.

And didn’t look away.

"You gonna tell me what you want?" She asked softly.

You waited a moment trying to piece together a thought.

"You," your tone quiet "I really want you."

She straightened her posture a bit.

"What do you mean?"

"...I wanna make you feel good" you said barely above a whisper

Cassies breathing hitched for a moment as she watched you to see if you'd take it back. But looking at that desperate expression on your face she knew you werent going to.

"Yeah?"

You nodded.

"Words baby." she corrected softly as she leaned in to you, face inching closer.

"Yeah," you whimpered pathetically.

She pressed her lips to yours and you both melted into each other with a needy moan.

You grabbed the base of her head tangling your fingers in her hair as you moaned against her lips.

"Thank you, thank you" you repeated between kisses.

The older woman smiled at your neediness.

"Youre so cute"

You pulled away to kiss down her neck

"Can I take your shirt off?"

She nods.

You wasted no time and threw it across the room. You threw yours too before attacking her chest with sloppy kisses.

"So eager," she laughed

"I can be good cass, really I can" you whined as you had her lay back so you could kiss down her stomach.

"I bet you could be baby" she brushes your hair out of your face.

You nod as you started to pull off her pants and throw them off the bed. She watched you with a smile.

Your needy gaze was turning her on more than anything. You looked at her like she was your reason for breathing and she loved every second of it.

She moaned softly as you bit and kissed her thighs.

"Please? I can make you feel so good cass, promise." You licked her inner thigh towards her core.

"Yeah? Is that what you wanted? Is that why you've been staring at me like that for the past hour, baby?" She mocks your desperate tone as she grips your hair.

"Yes, god yes. Please let me make you cum, please"

"Go ahead, show me what you've been wanting,"

You were quick to take her underwear off then dive straight into her pussy without much warning.

Her moans were all the encouragement you needed. You were sloppy with it, wanting to cherish the taste of your nearly year long crush now laying in your bed and wet for you.

Her grip on your hair stayed firm as she watched you and grinded her hips against your face, "yeah, yeah. Just like that— FUCK—!"

Your brows knitted at the sounds of her moans. You lived for how sensitive she was, knowing that no one had touched her in years and you've been given the honor to make her cum on your tongue nearly made you cum in your panties.

"So good baby— so good, you taste so good" your muffled praise had her mind spinning.

"Im close— bab— oh fuck honey please—"

You nodded watching her with blown pupils. You added two fingers and pumped her at a good pace making her back arch.

Cassies hold on your hair tightened as her thighs closed around your head as she came on your face with a loud pornographic moan that made your eyes roll back.

When she came down from her high she pulled you up for a deep kiss.

"Good?" You asked quietly while panting

"Perfect," she moved your hair out of your face.

"Now lets see how good you can really be, hm?" She grabs your throat and switches your positions knocking the air out of you.

"Fuck."

This is so much better than a movie.

[honeysapphic]

https://www.tumblr.com/honeysapphic/814000759039459328/so-excited-for-chapter-13?source=share

noooo i love long long angsty series!! and it is so gooddd too! i get emotional for them both in the latest chapter

What if I said wrote this as an angsty story so they can have nasty desperate sesbian lex in the last few chapters

[Im president of pathetic top mckay club]

Reader WILL be receiving that mcstrap if I have anything to say abt it.

Chap 12 out now