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@hopeful-n0mad
worship 4
His hands mapped her body. The dip of her waist, the soft give of her stomach, the line of her thigh. Not rushed. Not claiming. Learning.
She shivered. Not from cold. From being seen like this. Held like she mattered.
She touched his face. “I’m yours,” she whispered. “But I want to feel you now. I want to feel us.”
His throat tightened. He kissed her knee, her hip, the underside of her breast. Each place blooming under attention that demanded nothing.
“Do you feel safe with me?”
“Yes,” she breathed. “You make me feel real.”
He climbed over her. Skin to skin, everywhere. His cock heavy against her slick heat, waiting.
He cupped her face, eyes burning like she was something he had waited a lifetime to find. “I want you to feel all of me,” he whispered. “Not just the stretch. Not just the heat. Me.”
She nodded. Lifted her hips. Offered.
He pressed in.
Slow. Deep.
Her breath shattered. Arms clutched his back. Her body stretched to take him, a moan blooming against his throat like a vow.
“You’re mine.”
He began to move. Slow at first. Controlled. Almost all the way out, then sliding back in thick and steady. Her back arched, mouth falling open around a sound that broke between sob and moan.
He lifted her thigh higher, kissed her mouth as he drove deeper. Not soft. Not cruel. Intentional. Filling her.
Every stroke dragged against her walls, hot and relentless. She clenched around him like she could keep him there forever. He held the rhythm… steady, commanding… until she whimpered into his mouth. He stopped. Moved his head away to see her
“Look at me.”
She did.
He fucked her like that, eyes locked, long rolling thrusts, pressure climbing with every pass. The room filled with the slick, obscene music of her arousal.
Her nails raked his back. Her legs locked tighter, hips rising to meet him.
“You wanted to be taken,” he growled, restraint fraying. “So I’ll take you.”
She nodded, moaning, undone.
He pinned her wrists. Gripped her hip. And fucked her.
Hard. Precise. Relentless. Skin slapping loud into the quiet. Her moans broke apart, breathless gasps as her body shook beneath him.
“You feel that?” he murmured, thrusting deeper. She screamed. “That’s your body begging.”
She sobbed his name.
He angled harder, hitting her deep. “Right there. That’s what you needed.”
She nodded frantically.
Then he slowed… pulling almost all the way out… before slamming back in. Brutal. Calculated.
Her body arched. Pussy spasming, trembling, soaking them both.
He flipped her, pressed her down, drove back inside.
She screamed into the sheets.
“Don’t run,” he snarled into her ear. “Take it.”
He fucked her faster. Harder. Pulling her back into every thrust until she was nothing but wet heat and broken sound.
His hand found her clit. Rubbed merciless circles. Cruel. Focused.
She was gone. Twitching. Crying. He could feel she was almost to her limit.
“You close?”
She nodded, wrecked.
He stopped. Buried deep. Froze his hand.
She screamed.
“You don’t come until I say.”
She sobbed, trembling on the edge, pussy fluttering around him like she couldn’t hold back.
He started again. Slow. Deep. Grinding into her with rhythm meant to break her. Mouth at her neck, biting, whispering: “You’ll hold it for me. Ache for me. And when I let you go, you’ll shatter until there’s nothing left but me.”
“Please,” she begged. “I need it. Please let me. I’m yours. I...”
“Now.”
She shattered.
Her cunt clamped so tight he had to grit his teeth not to spill with her. She screamed into the mattress, legs kicking, hands clawing. He fucked her through it. Drove her into another.
“That’s it,” he growled. “My good girl.”
She collapsed, limp, undone.
Eventually she climbed on top, straddling him. Thighs slick. Mouth swollen. Eyes glassy but intent burning.
She rocked against him, dragging her soaked slit along his length. His hands locked on her thighs.
“You want to ride me?” he rasped.
She didn’t answer. She lined him up and sank down with a filthy moan that made his vision blur. Nails raked his chest as she rolled her hips, grinding, messy, desperate.
He watched her. Breasts bouncing, body rolling, every movement for him. She fucked him like hunger until he grabbed her hips and thrust up hard, tearing a cry from her lips.
She collapsed against his chest, still moving, clenching around him, voice breaking at his throat.
“Please… again… I want you to...”
He growled into her neck, flipping her one last time.
And he fucked her until she screamed his name like a promise.
He broke with her. Loud. Deep. Uncontrolled.
She wrapped around him like prayer. Claimed. Soaked. Spent.
After, his hand smoothed over her thigh. Her lips pressed to his shoulder. Their breath caught together in the same silence.
Not just his. Not just hers. Theirs.
Your body keeps score — healing your nervous system
Your body keeps score in a biological way. Every emotion you’ve ever felt has sent signals through your nervous system. In other words, all of your unaddressed emotions stay stored in your body. Whether you realized it or not, your heart rate changed. Your breathing shifted. Hormones surged. Muscles tensed. And if those experiences weren’t fully processed, your body adapted around them. This means you’re living in a constant low level state of fight, flight, or freeze without even realizing it. You will notice little things like tension in your shoulders, stomach issues, constantly anxious or being on edge, even changes with your hair, to give some examples
The problem is that your nervous system’s stress response is meant to be temporary so when it stays switched on for weeks, months, years, your body pays the price. Living in constant survival mode keeps you flooded with cortisol and adrenaline, raises inflammation, disrupts hormones & it weakens your immune system, which cause bigger problems with our health. This state of dysregulation has been medically linked to high blood pressure, heart disease, autoimmune conditions, digestive disorders like IBS, and even vulnerability to infections. It can also trigger anxiety, depression etc
To heal your nervous system you have to teach your body that it is safe. That looks like daily practices that signal safety to the body. In simple words, it’s calming practices which will teach your body a new baseline. One where you’re calm enough to respond instead of constantly reacting. I know this might sound silly and almost too simple for a problem that has such a big effect on your life. But that’s the whole point. Your nervous system doesn’t respond to complicated hacks or big changes. It responds to repetition, safety and tells your body that you are okay now
Some practices you can start to incorporate
1. Start your morning slow by taking deep breaths. Literally just 2–3 minutes before you grab your phones :) Put one hand on your chest and the other on your belly. Inhale deeply through your nose for 4 seconds, hold for 2, exhale slowly for 6. Repeat until your breath feels steady. I like meditating in the morning too, but that’s just me
2. Grounding makes such a big difference. I know it might sound insane and you won’t notice immediately but you will see the difference after a couple of weeks. Especially when you were stressed or anxious right before. Go outside and put your bare feet on grass for 5-10 minutes
3. Stretch! I’ve written about it here but I highly recommend stretching in the morning or before bed. Stress hides in your body and releasing the tension is a good idea. I personally stretch before bed every night. Since I’m sharing, I also put my feet up on the wall every night while doing my red light mask
4.Smell lavender, eucalyptus, drink chamomile tea at end of day, or listen to hz frequency music. When you activate your senses it pulls your body into the present moment. Frankincense for example can help lower stress hormones and activate the parasympathetic nervous system. You can diffuse them, rub a drop on your wrists, or inhale directly for an instant calm cue to your body
5. Journal!!!!! Write down three things that felt good every day, no matter how small. Gratitude signals safety to your nervous system and helps shift your baseline from stress to calm. The other day I was a little stressed and I caught myself and changed my thoughts to gratitude and I felt the tension leave my body
6. This one really ties into 1 but checking your phone first thing floods your brain with dopamine spikes before you’ve even fully woken up. This pushes your nervous system into “alert mode” instantly. I wait 30 minutes, but you can do at least 15. Combine this with daily stress, our natural morning cortisol boost, rushing, caffeine — not a great combination
7. Walks in nature are one of the quickest ways to calm a dysregulated nervous system. Just 20 minutes outside can lower cortisol, steady your heart rate and blood pressure and activate your parasympathetic rest and digest mode
8. Drink a glass of water before caffeine in the morning. I’m going to actually use this as an example so you guys can understand how these little things have a big impact on your body and why
When you wake up, your cortisol rises sharply within the first 30–45 minutes. This isn’t bad cortisol, it’s your body’s natural function to boost your energy, regulate your blood sugar and wakes up your metabolism and helps with mental clarity
The problem comes when your nervous system is dysregulated or under constant stress , your baseline cortisol could already be elevated or spiking too high. Adding coffee to that right away, especially on an empty stomach, can push levels into overdrive, leading to jitters, anxiety, or an energy crash later. It also increases stomach acid, which can cause irritation, while delaying caffeine and starting with hydration activates your “rest and digest” mode. Similarly, reaching for your phone the moment you wake up floods your brain with alerts, news and stress chemistry, but giving yourself a screen free window helps you set a grounded tone for the day. Even your blood sugar feels the difference
Caffeine without food not only causes sharp spikes and crashes that mimic anxiety but also disrupts your metabolism and affects your focus/ clarity. Without fuel, your body relies on stress hormones to keep blood sugar up, which slows your metabolism. This stress response also pulls resources away from the brain, which means brain fog, poor focus, and that wired but tired feeling. In contrast, starting your day with water and protein gives your body steady fuel, helps your metabolism, stabilizes your blood sugar which helps with clear thinking & sustaining focus
These are small little lifestyle changes. You don’t have to do them all, you can start with a few and you will start noticing the difference, I promise. Don’t overlook it just because they are too simple. They aren’t overly complicated habits but they will make you feel better and when you feel better your whole world and your outlook becomes better :)
oh you like history? name everything that ever happened
Franz Khafka
True that.
sometimes
in the heat of a moment
i struggle against him
in the midst of feral, intense sensation
i push back
against him
against his will
i fight him
in those moments
he grips me harder
he growls commands into my ear
his strong, silencing hand over my mouth
he yanks me closer against him
he reminds me that control
is his
his alone
i am safe
i let go
.
that moment could be about fucking
(that is a great fucking moment)
but the primal moment
when i try to escape
when i struggle against him
desperate not to
...burden him
i try to push him away
but he grips me harder
he growls commands into my ear
his strong, silencing hand over my mouth
he yanks me closer against him
he reminds me that
like control
i am his
and he will not allow me to be alone
i am safe
i let go
a motherfucker could use an embrace