Yeah… Mike is in denial and lying about being “in love with” El
I didn’t initially think this, but the last ep kind of confirmed it to me.
In the last ep, we see El, confront Mike about what he said in the cabin, when fighting with max (“I love her!”). Mike is confused, that was 3 months ago. Mike: “Um, I don’t think I follow?” And El says “You talked about your feelings your heart”. Mike just says “Oh! Oh, yeah that.Man, that was so long ago. Um…” and starts to scratch his head. Then he says everything he said at the cabin was “in the heat of the moment stuff and we were arguing…”, but he also says right after this… “ I don’t actually remember. What did I say exactly.” And yes he’s being genuine, in an other post here- you see his genuinely confused face and how when El kisses him he keeps his EYES OPEN THE ENTIRE TIME, and as El leaves smiling he just has a confused expression and looks away.
But the thing is, him not remembering he yelled “I love her”, doesn’t make much sense since he awkwardly tried to say it to her face- for several minutes at the grocery store. And that’s when I realized his whole speech was extremely rehearsed/fake, and clearly lines he heard other people say and then I noticed another pattern. When Will is clearly upset and jealous they get into a fight.
Mike says “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls!”, then tries to ½ apologize only to say, “I’m not trying to be a jerk. Ok? But We’re not kids anymore.” He pretty much explains, this is just the way things are-boys fall in love with girls, get girlfriends, and that’s just a part of growing up (heteronormativity). And tells Will “I mean, what did you think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? We were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?”
And poor Will who is probably more aware of his feelings just responds. “Yeah. I guess I did. I really did.” Poor Will even calls himself “stupid” multiple times, for thinking he ever had a chance.
But Mike, after he says “I love her!” in front of everyone (cause he’s trying to prove he loves her infront of others) can’t even say it to her face. And it becomes quite apparent, he’s parroting and emulating what others say. “I just y’know never felt like this , with anyone before … and…y’know they do say it makes you crazy.” El: “what makes you crazy?”
Mike: “you never - you never heard that term ? You know like the phrase, like “blank makes you crazy” (he can’t even use the word love to her face, and he doesn’t say I love you back in the last ep, even when she says she loves him)
He continues, shaking his head confused. “It’s like a feeling or a ... .
“like something, like OLD PEOPLE say it (love) to each other sometimes” He can’t even describe love and what his “feelings” entail for El , he then says “Yeah, like something , like old people say it some times. Yeah.” It’s all talk, but no feeling, it’s just a part of becoming an adult in Mike’s mind. That’s why he can remember what he said to Will the first time they met, almost 10 years ago, but he can’t remember saying “I love her” 3 months ago (despite doing this whole speech).
*first four byler gifs by strangerthingscast, mileven gifs by livelovecaliforniadreams.*
In the last ep before the mileven kiss, he even invites both El and Will over for Christmas “ And Will too… we could all have new presents to play with and… *scoffs* Sorry, that made me sound like a 7 year old... ”. And it’s implied (before the mileven kiss), because of the 3 month breakup Mike is back to liking d &d- since this scene happens right before the mileven kiss.
Mike gets upset with the idea of Will not wanting to “play games anymore”. (having feelings for him). The same harmful line he threw at Will.
And Will, says if Mike (doesn’t want to pretend to be an adult) and actually reciprocate his feeling then yeah “he’ll play” d&d.
So then Mike asks, shyly …
*cough- girls (the other ‘species’, or just someone else: girl, guy or otherwise)
Will, will always love Mike.
And even if Mike doesn’t realize it, this makes him happy, it’s that “feeling” he couldn’t describe.
Although, I 100% believe Mike will probably regress and be in denial about his feelings until the end of the series, maybe ‘get back together’ with El. Right after this scene, he apologizes for sounding like a “7 year old”. Mike clearly has a lot of internalized homophobia/biphobia- and is trying to emulate what is considered normal “adult behavior.” While he thinks subconsciously his feelings of ‘friendship’ (being in love with Will) is just something that he needs to grow out of, and he just can’t be a kid anymore.
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