hey guys! today we’re talking about eating disorder recovery. this has been highly requested for some time. i’m going to share a little bit about what to expect from recovery and how to cope, as well as what my personal experience was like. so without further ado, let’s get into it!
your metabolism is not dead. your body is very smart, so it will adapt to whatever you put it through…
as you begin to eat more, your metabolism will adjust to your higher calorie intake. you will gain a bit of weight at first, but eventually your body will function normally again and your bmr (basal metabolic rate- the amount of calories you burn each day) will also return to normal.
stretchmarks may appear on your body. this does not mean you’re fat! it means that your body is growing quickly, as you’re likely eating a lot of calories in recovery. i have stretchmarks on my thighs and breasts from recovery, and i’m still underweight. stretchmarks do not = fat. stretchmarks = growth.
don’t refuse to eat because then you’ll get tubed, and it’s not pleasant. a feeding tube will give you the same amount of calories that the food will… so if you can (i know it might be too hard but please try), choose to eat! take this time to enjoy the food you have been deprived of for so long. having a tube shoved through your nose is not fun.
if you are allowed to do so, take up strength training! i cannot emphasise enough how much lifting weights helped me get through recovery. it’s a fantastic way to cope. turn some of those extra calories into muscle! i used to think that “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” but boy i was wrong… food tastes pretty dang amazing, and being strong is so much better than being skinny!
strength training is also a good way to eat more calories while remaining relatively lean. i personally gained a lot of fat back in the stomach area, but lifting weights completely changed my body’s composition- now i have abs while eating 2000+ calories a day.
if you’re not allowed to exercise, try doing some yoga or taking walks. exercise has so many benefits and can help you cope with the stress of recovery. but if you aren’t able to be active, don’t worry! right now is a time for rest and healing.
a lot of the weight you will gain is recovery is not actual fat. it’s water, food, or waste that’s contributing to the number on the scale. after leaving recovery it’s very likely that you’ll notice a large drop in your weight. this is mostly because of water retention. the purpose of recovery isn’t to make you fat, i promise.
during this time, you may start to experience binge eating. this is completely normal after a period of severe food restriction. your brain is sending signals to your body to eat as much as possible, because it doesn’t know when the next period of starvation will be.
once you reach a healthy weight and/or replenish any nutrient deficiencies, you will stop binging. it is not forever. try to go with the flow and allow your body to restore itself.
many people who have a restrictive eating disorder like anorexia will eventually develop binge eating disorder. so if it happens to you, don’t feel bad about yourself. you’re not a failure or a pig or someone with no self control. it happens to lots of people! it happened to me. your pain and struggles are completely valid.
however, if binging becomes a lasting problem that is causing you a lot of distress, it may be time to seek help. for tips on how to deal with and prevent binging, check out my masterpost on binge eating here.
it’s common knowledge that bloating can be intense during recovery. your digestive system is having to adjust to your higher food intake. your stomach actually shrinks when you’re starving, so right now it’s expanding back to a normal size. (please note that the shrinkage of your stomach does not affect how flat your belly looks. there is nothing positive about stomach shrinkage. your stomach is an organ.)
one of my biggest tips to avoid bloating is to eat liquid foods, or foods high in calories. a lot of people in recovery eat around 3000 calories a day… that’s a lotta food! eat things like avocado, nuts + nut butters, granola, and other high-cal things. or you can choose to drink your calories in shakes or smoothies. this helps you hit your calorie target without eating so much food you feel sick.
the usual tips: drink hot tea to settle your stomach, or use a heating pad. lying down in bed can also help. take your time eating your food.
you shouldn’t be ashamed of your belly, but the bloating may make you self-conscious and that’s okay. if you feel more comfortable, wear baggy shirts and hoodies. everyone will understand. i practically lived in big sweaters during the first few months of recovery… just remember that this won’t last forever. once your stomach gets used to food, the bloating will stop.
(i’ll probably make a more in-depth post on dealing with bloating, so stay tuned for that.)
an eating disorder can cause your appearance to suffer. your hair becomes damaged and falls out in clumps, your teeth rot, your skin and nails become brittle… and so on. the first step to looking healthy, of course, is eating enough food. but here’s a few more tips to repair some of that damage.
hair- don’t wash your hair with shampoo every day, as this can strip your hair of its natural oils. try to wear your hair up when you can to minimize breakage. take a multivitamin designed for replenishing hair- and stay hydrated! you can also try a keratin spray, which is a protein to repair damaged hair. i use one (just found at my local drugstore) and it is a total game changer.
nails- take off all your nail polish and let your poor nails breathe. then soak them in warm water. there are also vitamins out there for healthy nails.
teeth- go to the dentist and get your teeth cleaned and checked for any cavities. that’s always the first step. eating disorders can cause your teeth enamel to weaken, resulting in inflamed gums and yellow or crooked teeth… that may even fall out. you should floss and brush daily. avoid acidic foods and drinks! and try a baking soda toothpaste and/or a flouride mouth rinse to help restore your enamel.
skin- the important thing here is to drink lots of water. your skin may be dry and patchy, covered in acne, or easily irritated as a result of your disorder. once again i suggest taking a vitamin. some other tips are to avoid hot showers, try not to touch your face, and use a gentle facial cleanser at night. i personally love cetaphil because it’s so gentle but effective. if you have acne, medication can help if needed, but you should avoid using tons of products on your skin. (a cleanser and a moisturizer will suffice.)
don’t worry about eating healthy right now. just worry about eating. also, eating “bad” foods- like ice cream and burgers and pizza- is actually encouraged during recovery. it’s exposure therapy, in a way, and it helps to rewire your brain and improve your relationship with food. where you get your calories from won’t affect how much weight you gain… a calorie is a calorie.
have a support system! this is extremely important. having loved ones by your side throughout this hard time will make it much more bearable. don’t underestimate the power of company. it will motivate and comfort you. no one should be alone when they’re going through recovery.
to any teens out there: remember that teenagers burn a ton of calories, since they’re growing like crazy. the recommended amount for a sedentary teen girl is 1800. for active teens, the number is definitely over 2000 and sometimes even around 3000. teen boys need even more calories! there are a lot of low-cal diets out there that are total bullshit, but are just straight-up dangerous for teenagers. by not eating enough, you are stunting your growth and slowing down your metabolism. my maintenance calories are around 2000, and i’m only about 100 lbs. a vast majority of teens really underestimate the amount of cals that they actually need!
never be afraid to ask for help if you’re concerned about your mental health. even if you think you’re not sick enough or don’t deserve help. you do. i promise.
and remember that you are not your disorder. you are not your intrusive thoughts, or a number on the scale. you are a unique and amazing and beautiful human with people who love you- and that’s the tea.
inpatient- this is typically prescribed for those who have medical issues, are severely underweight, or are refusing to eat. you stay in a hospital setting, days and nights, where you can be monitored and treated by medical professionals. you can expect regular lab tests (blood draws, urine samples, scans), weigh-ins, and meetings with the hospital psychologist. exercise is usually not allowed. if you refuse to eat, you will be given a feeding tube. the main goal for inpatient treatment is weight restoration and resolving any health issues. it is a short term solution.
outpatient- there are a variety of outpatient programs out there, and this type of treatment is more convenient and less intrusive. you go to a treatment center for a few hours each day and work with a team of medical professionals, but you don’t stay overnight and you can live your life pretty much normally. however this is not recommended for people who live alone, because there’s no one to hold you accountable outside of the treatment center. this is the most commonly prescribed method of treatment.
residential- this is when you go to a group home to get treatment. you stay there full time, days and nights, and there’s more of a focus on therapy. it’s a good way to make friends and be around people who are struggling like you are. it’s also much more relaxed than inpatient hospitalization. residential treatment programs are recommended for more severe cases, when medical issues are resolved.
the family-based approach is very effective for teenagers with anorexia. you can find out more here.
click here to learn more about which type of recovery is right for you personally.
list of international suicide hotlines
text 741-741 to chat with a trained counselor at any time. if you’re a person of color and would feel more comfortable talking to a counselor from a more multicultural group of people, text the word “STEVE” to this number.
national eating disorder association
see more resources on my help page
how to tell your parents you have an eating disorder
do i have an eating disorder? quiz (a medical professional is the only one who can diagnose you, but this can help you recognize some of your symptoms.)
self care after binging and purging
medical emergency warning signs in those with eating disorders
(these are just a few of the recovery blogs out there! the recovery community on tumblr is vast and supportive.)
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