Ivan

Honest thoughts and musings of a college student and aspiring health profession, figuring out what it means to "deny himself and take up his cross" (Matthew 16:24) to follow Christ in daily life.

[godlywoman]

Is there anything in your life that you would consider more important than being a man or a woman who has a heart after God?

[iamivanlee-blog]

This world (or country, or city, or nation) is not my home. I’m just passing through.

[godlywoman]

Thank God He loves us enough not to leave us where we are.

Charles Stanley  (via littlethingsaboutgod)

[madebyastarbreather-deactivated]

When the enemy is hidden, and people fight people. When we make leaders, or governors, or friends, or neighbors the enemy…Satan sits back, and claps his hands saying, “well done! You’re getting it!”

(via madebyastarbreather)

[theharriot]

81% of evangelicals voted Trump.

But they still approve of fornication, divorce for poor reasons, and not serving the poor. Things Jesus highly and clearly talked against.

I am sad, yes. But mostly, I believe a time for revival is soon to come. Because you need it.

[iamivanlee-blog]

Days like these where I literally fall flat on the floor is when I’m thankful for how blessed I am by the people I know here in SF and the ministry I’m part of in Cru/Epic, who went the extra mile to make sure I was going to be ok. Also blessed by friends who would message me to make sure I was ok too :)

[iamivanlee-blog]

“Are you really religious?”

I feel like this is a question that I’ve been asked so much more this year, and it always comes up when I mention that I go to church on Sundays.

I fear that maybe I’m not doing my job to be a witness if people only realize that I’m a man of faith once I mention “church,” like it’s some magic word.

Is it because I don’t have the cleanest mouth? Or is it because I've had alcohol before (I’m not a drunken raging alcoholic or crazy party kid, don’t worry)? Or is it beyond things that are defining and differentiating “religious” with “normal” that I do?

Maybe it’s time I evaluate how I’m living out my faith - not just through getting rid of the bad habits but also being sure that I’m emphasizing good habits in my own life.

Or maybe this is my chance to show others that it’s more than being “religious” when it comes to faith. It’s not about following rules (although I probably should cuss less and maybe not say yes to a beer with my dinner next time i get offered one) that makes me a believer, but the fact that I’m not worthy and perfect enough.

[jspark3000]

It’s really difficult to confront your own ugliness inside. It’s hard because no one wants to say, ‘I’m a bad person, I did a bad thing.’ We want to say, ‘It’s their fault, they made me do it.’ It’s hard to confront your own selfishness; it hurts. But once you confront the truth about yourself in the presence of God, you will be liberated and free from the weight of your own lies to yourself. That’s when God begins the path to healing, when Jesus rolls up his sleeves and by his grace, moves you forward into his goodness. But we begin with honesty.

J.S. Park (via jspark3000)

[randytemple-deactivated20180205]

Walk in a manner worthy of the Lord.

1 Thessalonians 2:12 (via randytemple)

[iamivanlee-blog]

Speaking of old ties (refer to first post), 

October 31st will mark my 3rd year anniversary of being free from cutting!

I’m still bound by many sins, and my mental health is still a struggle at times,

But it feels great to celebrate the joy I’ve found in the freedom from my crippling depression.

And I’m happy that I’ve taken steps to be proactive about my mental health too. I’ve been able to talk to my dark past with others whom I trust for emotional and spiritual guidance. I’ve been able to share my experience with different groups to help others understand mental health, especially at an intersection with faith. I’ve also started seeing a therapist (5 years late) to keep my mental health in check, and to prepare myself in case a bad panic attack or depressive episode occurs again.

God is good! 

[jspark3000]

I’m so exhausted. I want to quit. I want to check out.

But God, I want to press in. I want to fight. I want to remember what I’m about.

[iamivanlee-blog]

Late Night Thoughts, and Why I Made a Separate Tumblr

OK IF YOU READ THE ORIGINAL YOU DON’T WANNA REREAD THIS ONE IT’S ESSENTIALLY THE SAME THING I’M SO SORRY

So if you made it here from d00dnamed1v4n, hi. Welcome to my new tumblr. It’s most likely going to be nothing like my other tumblr, so if you followed me because you enjoyed what was once a steady influx of landscapes, coffee, hipster menswear, memes, gaming/nerd references, puppies, and random audio posts of underground metal/punk/emo/indie music, then this is not the tumblr for that. If you came purely for that, that’s all on d00dnamed1v4n. What was once the pride of consistently having 200+ followers due to content has faded - so my original blog will be there, but it’ll be rather stale and inactive.

What this tumblr is going to be is essentially a spiritual journal of sorts, and actual wordpress-esque blog. Yeah, I might reblog excerpts from sermons or bible verses or an inspiring life quote here or there (as opposed to d00dnamed1v4n, which is for the coffee and memes), but I think this is going to be a space to share thoughts that may not be appropriate to share on larger social media space, but are also not things I want to keep to myself simply, and could benefit from the reception of an intimate audience.

So yes, this may become one of those boring blogs where I just talk about my life and post pictures that aren’t pretty enough for Instagram to share a more DEEP personal side of me that I don’t put out in the world as much. It’ll be a way for me to process thoughts, and place it in a medium so that maybe others can resonate from it. The old tumblr I had since middle school, dragged me through a lot of the emotional, mental, and spiritual garbage, so I’m cutting some ties with that and putting personal stuff here, instead of tagging a post as personal and making it a huge rant post or cry for help about issues that I probably needed to talk to my counselor about. This will be a more organized, genuine (and probably healthier) way of getting my thoughts out. Plus, followers here will learn more about me without making association about my character with random pictures.

TL;DR lost interest in just reblogging content for the sake of content wanted a space to make an actual blog to share thoughts and ideas decided to make a new tumblr to separate ties the old one has now you get to read my brain and see what I think about