get it? big ears?

Ian Motherfuckin' novak. or, just, you know. ian. information broker & lie detector ex-marine.

[ianxxwtf-blog]

ezracarsonx:

“I mean, I’ve heard of kegel exercises for men, but I’m not sure you’re doing it right.”  Ezra said, then snapped his fingers.  “No wait, I got a better one:  Novak, disco isn’t trying to make a comeback, no matter what Francisco says.”  Ezra tapped his finger on his mouth.  “I have more. Conon O’Brien’s thread-hip dance, ants in your pants, a whole slew of tantric sex jokes…”

Ian listened to everything Ezra was saying and with each additional jab his grin only got a little bit wider. By the end of it, his shoulders shook with a fair bit of laughter, even if his cheeks and neck did flush red. “It doesn’t really count as a joke if you have to lump them all together, so I’m not going to be able to grant you points for the last one. All the others were good, though. 8.5/10.”  

[ianxxwtf-blog]

youngnscrappy-luke:

Luke snorted out a laugh, a smile stretching across his face as he looked at the taller man. “Fuckin all of it man!” The asset laughed. “The fuck was that?” Luke mimicked the hip action before falling into a fit of laughter.

“It was... better dancing than what you’re ever gonna do,” Ian said, though his face never broke from the kind, though embarrassed, smile on his face. “Great for loosening up the hips.” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

aindrea:

Aindrea was doing his typical ‘roaming around without a destination’ thing so he was actually just walking around from one place to another. He was just walking past one office when he noticed someone in it and of course he had to take a look. He was going to just glance in to see who it was, but he surely didn’t recognise the guy but whatever he was doing caught the pianist’s attention. Was that.. dancing? But then Aindrea was noticed and he flashed a bright smile at the man. “I can always say I didn’t see a thing.”

Ian’s cheeks flamed red and he laughed, the sound nervous even if it sounded full. “Yeah,” he said, rubbing the back of his head as he hopped down from his desk (because, yes, somehow, he had thought that was a good idea at the time.) “That’d probably be for the best.” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

kind-soul-quint:

Quint didnt really know what he was expecting when he walked down the hall, his eyes originally down on the paper he was delivering. But when he looked up, he was sure seeing the associate doing that odd small thrust with his hips topped off with a scoot was not what he expected. Quint watched for a few moments before the other seemed to realize he was watching the one eyed man quirking a scarred brow. “I think the end of it.” He replied with a soft chuckle.

“Whew,” Ian said as he wiped a bead of fake sweat off of his brow. “If you didn’t see me attempt the jump from Dirty Dancing solo, you didn’t see the whole thing.” Still, though, his cheeks were bright red. “Was there, uh, something I could do for you? Other than providing this week’s newest episode of Dancing With the Stars?” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

There was really no excuse for the terrible dancing. Ian didn’t drink, so it wasn’t that. There weren’t any other people dancing, so it wasn’t crowd pressure. In fact, Ian was just standing alone in his office, lost in his own world, doing a weird... thing with his hips. Frankly, one would be hard pressed to call it dancing at all. Though as soon as he heard someone approach, he jumped and turned, hand running through dark hair as he cleared his throat. 

“How much of that did you see?” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

Whispered something in your ear. It was a perverted thing to say, but I said it anyway. Made you smile and look away. Nothing's gonna hurt you baby, as long as you're with me you'll be just fine. Nothing's gonna hurt you baby, nothing's gonna take you from my side. When we dance in my living room to that silly 90's R&B, when we have a drink or three, always ends in a hazy shower scene.

@franciscoxjavier

[ianxxwtf-blog]

franciscoxjavier:

Francisco would most likely be more annoyed than physically sick when morning came. And Francisco in a bad mood was worse than when he was ill. He was thankful for the adjustment of the shower head - because being waterboarded was never any fun.

At this point one of Francisco’s hand strayed from Ian’s thigh to run down his abdomen to his own cock, the other gently keeping Ian in place. A stifled moan crept up his throat, stroking himself as he relaxed his gag reflex to take in as much of Ian as he could before moving up to suck around the head then back down again. Everything felt almost too good, and he wanted to keep this going for as long as the both of them could bear - pausing occasionally when he felt Ian tense then starting back again.

As the pace of his hand got quicker and his own soft groans of pleasure were more frequent, his mouth and tongue were less efficient in their work but got the job done. Because soon after he twisted around his own shaft for a final time, catching his own load against his fingers with a strained groan, Ian was swelling and shooting into his mouth and down his throat.

He moved back to swallow, something he now realized he didn’t do often (in fact, he couldn’t remember the last time he let someone come in his mouth,) before he stood again. A hand raised to swipe across his bottom lip with a small little smile. “Only for you, Ian.” 

Ian’s heart always felt just a little too big for his chest, but that feeling was doubled when Francisco was around. He could feel all the tension leave his body and as soon as he could, he looked right at Francisco and gave a slightly exhausted smile before leaning in and kissing the other again. 

He had never expected their relationship to go here, not once back when they first met. But he was so fucking glad it had. 

“Thank you,” he muttered, and tried to maneuver around on wiggly legs. “Let’s get you in bed now, before the crash hits you too hard. We can sleep the day away.” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

Text >> Ian

Fran: you're right

Fran: It is, I can just see your face, your brow gets all furrowed and you look very determined Muy lindo

Fran: Alright, do what you think is best

Fran: Just don't get yourself in trouble either ok?

Ian: okay, i wont.

Ian: promise

Ian: let me pick something up for you for dinner?

[ianxxwtf-blog]

franciscoxjavier:

Francisco loved Ian for a lot of reasons, and every day that passed he would fall a little deeper for this man, but near the top of that list was how invested Ian was in him. There was no other feeling like that in the world - knowing that someone loved you.

But even in his drugged state of mind Francisco was more concerned about giving than receiving. Just hearing the stuttered words fall from Ian’s mouth was enough to send little shocks of pleasure down his spine and to his own length.

Since Francisco had a mouth full of Ian’s cock he couldn’t exactly respond anything more than a soft hum. His eyes flickered up to meet Ian’s gaze, hollowing his cheeks as his head bobbed back and forth. He was sucking Ian off, sloppy and eager, hoping that he could help Ian feel as good as he felt right now. At least, before he crashed and Ian would have to deal with a more irritable than usual Francisco in the morning.

Ian knew Fran was going to feel like shit in the morning, and he sort of felt bad for not making sure he was going to get enough rest now. Sort of. But mostly he was just ridiculously thankful that he had this beautiful man on his knees in front of him in the shower. Ian reached back and adjusted the shower head to make sure Francisco wasn’t getting pelted in the face with water while he worked, because nothing was worse than a nose full of water while you were trying to go down on someone, damn. 

“Oh, f-fuck,” Ian muttered, his hand slipping down his chest some to grip gently at the wet mop of hair atop Francisco’s head. “Look at you. So fucking perfect. Your mouth is f-fucking heaven, Francisco.” 

Ian’s head tipped back some and rest against the cool wall of the shower, careful not to press his hips forward in fear of going too deep or stimulating Francisco’s gag reflex. He just needed to collect himself or he was going to finish way, way too fast. 

This went on for a while, Ian breathlessly, mouthily whispering words of worship to Francisco as he continued to work his mouth around his cock, and for a second Ian wished he was better at the dirty talk, because he kind of wanted to get into it right then and there. But it was hard for him to think much further than that before he was giving Fran a little warning and finishing with a groan in the asset’s mouth. 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

Text >> Ian

Fran: I could handle this too it wasn't an Associate

Fran: But no matter what talk with Ezra he might have already taken care of it

Fran: This is slightly out of character for me but when you take charge like this

Fran: its very attractive

Fran: But don't let that go to your head

Ian: I know you can, and I'm more than happy to let you

Ian: but he's one of bellamy's favorites, and i'm not about to let that ancient asshole have any excuse to hurt you

Ian: but really is it

Ian: 😎😎😎

Ian: even if ezra does take care of it i'm going to talk to the kid too

[ianxxwtf-blog]

franciscoxjavier:

Wow, Francisco loved Ian’s laugh. Add that to the long list of things Francisco adored about him, and if it was already there underline it. Twice. He smiled, pressing sweet kisses all over Ian’s face. This was fun now but when he crashed it wouldn’t be. Luckily he would be snuggled up next to Ian by that time. 

“I wouldn’t mind if they were.” Was his response, mumbled against Ian’s ear, nipping gently at the lobe. Francisco would be mad a hell in the morning, but right now, he was too caught up Ian’s lips against his skin. He focused on not grinding his teeth, it helped that his lips were slightly parted, “I’m sure I’ll be fine.” Positive.

Gasping a little in the hot shower, Francisco’s head leaned back when Ian found his already half hard length. His eyes closed briefly, letting a shallow exhale fall from his lips before meeting Ian’s gaze. He stared back at the man through half lidded eyes, when suddenly it occurred to him that if he wouldn’t feel so great in the morning, he might as well thank Ian now. Francisco quickly pressed another deep kiss over Ian’s lips, reaching between them to find Ian’s length now, stroking gently as he dragged his lips over Ian’s jaw, down the man’s neck and chest and abdomen until his knees hit the floor. The water almost felt too good on his back, hands moving then to explore behind Ian, feeling over the curve of his ass to the back of the man’s thighs. He thought about his conversation with Ezra, jokingly thanking Mother Mary for blessing him with Ian’s ass. Starting with mouthing over Ian’s thigh then balls, before dragging the flat of his tongue, slowly, up Ian’s shaft. 

Ian would like to keep his hands on Francisco forever, he knew. He could spend all day trailing his finger tips along the various dips and curves of his musculature. He wanted to spend hours touching and tasting and learning and re-learning every single part of this man. He was so enthralled, always, and if he was any more of a sap he might have said that out loud. 

But instead he was caught by the feeling of Francisco’s mouth. “Wait, Fran- I wanted to-,” wanted to what? The words were gone from his mouth before he had a chance to even finish the thought. His thought process had involved Fran being the one on the feel good drugs, so he should experience at least one orgasm that way, but Ian was a weak, weak man. 

“Fuck, you’re too good for me,” he muttered. “Too good to me.” Ian’s fingers pushed Fran’s hair, now matted and wet, back from his face to get a better view of him. “I love you so fucking much.” 

[ianxxwtf-blog]

Text >> Ian

Fran: Edric Wescott

Fran: Ezra said he was the guy handing out drinks says he's a drug chemist or something

Ian: thank you

Ian: I'm going to take care of this.

Ian: drugging people isn't acceptable

Ian: but you're more than 'people'

[ianxxwtf-blog]

@luther

Luther: you do sound 12, tbh

Ian: right okay

Ian: thanks for your help, i'll let you know what i find out.

[ianxxwtf-blog]

@luther

Luther: ??

Luther: what did i say???

Ian: you called me boring and said i deserved the things the gossip blog said about me

Ian: which i could understand if we were 12

Ian: but it's okay, honestly, i'd rather someone consider me boring because at least then i'm also safe

Ian: it was a carelessly hurtful thing to say and i dont appreciate it at all.

[ianxxwtf-blog]

@luther

Luther: i have a storage full of guns

Luther: well, maybe you deserve them :/

Luther: you're pretty boring

Ian:

Ian:

Ian: wow okay well it's been nice talking to you

[ianxxwtf-blog]

@luther

Luther: he's an asshole and a half

Luther: how do you not know him? don't you read the gossip blog?

Luther: his apartment, or office

Luther: i'll call my bodyguards

Ian: oh you have bodyguards, thats nice

Ian: i only have a gun

Ian: of course i read the gossip blog

Ian: it says mean things about me and francisco all the time

[ianxxwtf-blog]

@luther

Luther: oh my god, what is is with people drugging others without their consent!

Luther: i bet it was keaton!

Luther: he's into that type of shit

Luther: let's go kick his ass

Luther: i drank from a bottle of champagne i opened myself, so no

Ian: i don't think i know a keaton, is he an associate?

Ian: yes i agree let's go kick his ass

Ian: good im glad you didn't get drugged too

Ian: where will i find this keaton?