If Eridan werenât so fucking terrified of spending the rest of his life, long or short, totally alone, heâd tell Karkat to forget about meeting up at all. As it is, no one is going to welcome him with open arms, not even Karkat, and thereâs no use in hoping for anything else. In fact Eridan hopes that Karkat neglects to mention to anyone that Eridan is on his way. Â He can easily imagine, half way there, getting trolled by Karkat: HEY THE OTHER HALFWITS SAID THEYâD JUST DRAW AND QUARTER YOU IF YOU SHOW UP, SO JUST GO BACK HOME AND HOPE YOU DONâT GET FUCKING EATEN. Eridan would still show up, of course, because dead is better than alone and heâs not willing to let them get away with escaping and leaving him here to kill himself if he can help it, but ideally Eridan â Eridan wants to get out with them.
He wants to see the ocean again, the proper ocean, and then never talk to anyone he played the games with ever again maybe, since that might cut down on the gnawing, grinding guilt. Guilt that sits in his stomach like acid, tearing away at him over and over, especially because as he glances up from the computer to distract himself from the bleakness of meeting up with anyone, even Karkat, his own voice starts ringing in his ears again and he catches a glimpse of lusus-white and he has to stare at the screen really fucking intently so that he doesnât get caught up in the wavy posh lecture he knows heâs about to rehear.
Getting distracted during this conversation with Karkat would be a huge fucking mistake, anyway. He needs to get his information and leave before Karkat changes his mind or before he gets caught up in reliving everything heâs ever done in his hive. Maybe the sooner he leaves the sooner this will go away, because wherever Karkat and company are holed up, it couldnât possibly be so goddamn fraught with memories as Eridanâs hive is. Still, though, given the bitchfest thatâs probably going to be thrown when Eridan shows up, itâs a little ridiculous for Karkat to suggest he meet up with someone. âRidiculousâ here being read as âtotally fuckin bullshit drivelâ.
 CA: ok kar im just goin to come right out an call you on obvviously bein too much of a goddamn optimist
CA: somethin wwhich let me make this clear i nevver thought i wwould actually be fuckin sayin about you but
CA: please take a fuckin moment to consider that no one wwould fuckin team up wwith me wwhen wwe wwere playin sgrub not a single goddamn fuckin person
CA: so im just goin to go out on a fuckin limb here an guess that no one else wwill evven wwant to fuckin talk to me
CA: let alone fuckin team up like some kind a feelgood fuckin wriggler special wwhere wwe all learn howw to get along in the end
CA: i mean yeah thats a touchin fuckin picture to paint i wwould wwhat provve my wworth wwith some kind a dramatic sacrifice an then evverythin wwould be great in the end yeah im sure that wwould make big fuckin money in the theaters
CA: but back in fuckin reality im goin to be makin this trip goddamn alone an wwe both knoww it so howw about wwe dont beat around the fuckin bush like wwere honestly lookin to spare my fuckin feelings
CA: i promise not to fuckin burst into tears like a grub an sob all ovver you demandin wwhy theyre bein so mean to me
CA:Â ill get movvin as soon as fuckin possible
CA: but im not goin to evven bother lookin for someone to join up wwith
Eridan almost leaves then, mouse hovering over the X to close the conversation, but it occurs to him that with how large his hive is, and with everything still being intact, there might be another way he could possibly be helpful. Before the game Eridan never would have thought to ask, and if he had thought to do so wouldnât have offered because it will be a huge fucking bother, if he offers to bring stuff along and then actually has to lug something all the way to bumfuck nowhere or what have you. But any way he can be useful ups his chances of survival.
CA: before i leave kar are you guys missin anythin wwhere you are that i should try an take wwith me if i havve it at my hivve
CA: since i assume im not fuckin goin to be comin back here on a goddamn wwhim after i get to you
CA: in fact let me just fuckin throw out that i wwont be fuckin comin back here evven if you do fuckin need somethin because its creepy an cold an im really startin to hate my hive wwhich i didnât evven think wwas possible but there wwe fuckin are
And besides, if heâs going to be living with them how annoying would it be to get there and then be told that they need something that he could have just brought with him? Eridan never wants to return to his hive, at least not while heâs still seeing things. His lusus is gone and all of his spoils from FLARPing donât mean fucking anything, and if Eridan has his way the first place heâll go when they get out of this glitch shithole is a place heâs never been with no one whoâs ever met him where he can sit around not thinking about what a terrible fucking friend he is.
So if he offers to bring shit now and then they need more things from his hive later, well, Eridan is just going to make them send someone else, and that troll can trash his hive as much as they want and no shits will be given. The last few weeks here have sucked shame orbs.