1 sports day down, 1 to go
1) sack race. Shambles. Just a bunch of kids tripping over sacks and falling over.
2) lil obstacle course where they had to weave between poles, balance an egg on a spoon, jump 2 mini hurdles and sprint to the end. My kid raced like twice in a 10 minute space. Honestly by that point my ADHD had already fully kicked in and I kept forgetting where we were and that I even had a kid tbh.
3) high jump. But not really. They just had to jump as far as they could, but Mr 6s group decided that actually it would be much more fun to jump, fall to the floor, then roll forward as far as they could to make it look like they’d jumped that far. The teachers had solidly clocked out by this point and just let them get the fuck on with it.
4) rocket launch. Basically baby style javelin. They just had to throw soft foam rockets as far as they could. Can’t tell you if my kid did well or not because a fist fight broke out between the 4 and 5 year olds and one kid had another in a headlock.
5) final station. Beanbag toss. They had to chuck a bean bag into a tyre, and every time they got it in, the tyre moved back. Which is great in theory except all the kids kept cheating and moving the starting cones further forward to stay as close to the tyre as possible.
Just pure anarchy. It was brilliant.
They did a toddler race and no word of a lie one parent DRAGGED her kid across that finish line so rapid his feet didn’t even touch the floor. Then they did a mums race. Then they did a dad’s race and for this part specifically I took out my earbuds to listen to the conversations around me and believe me when I tell you I was PISSING. These mums don’t give a FUCK.
All these macho guys all went up to the start line, about 30 of them give or take, and the following comments came from the women around me ;
“Why are there so many of them?” “Where did they all come from?” “Why are they all puffing their chests out?” “This is embarrassing” “how pathetic” “why are they all so angry!?”
I was CRYING. These guys were pushing each other, trying to trip each other up… like my guys were in a playground and all you get at the end is a sticker so…
Also shout out to when one of the little girls with additional needs managed to escape her teacher and took off across the race track, tripped a kid doing the 500m sprint, sent her flying, then continued to weave all over the track faster than Usain Bolt whilst her teacher tried to catch her. Absolutely brilliant. 👏
Whatever. Ones done. The other is next week. Pray for me.
