How do we see attraction as individuals?
Hi and welcome all you beautiful people, I hope you all having an awesome day, what is attraction? Attraction is a quality that causes an interest, desire in, or gravitation to something or someone. Now what attracts people to each other, let’s see good looks, ambition, and a good sense of humor are common qualities that people seek out. But there are other factors you're likely unaware of that play an important part in who you're attracted to. Past experiences, proximity, and biology all have a role in determining who catches our attention and who doesn't. So for now let’s look at physical attraction for the moment, As an individual what physical features do you find attractive in a person, and does society play a role in your decision making? What I mean by that is if you were alone in a room and given a book filled with pictures of different people who all had a different look to them, and asked to pick the person you found most attractive. While your choice being kept anonymous from anyone else, without having to worry about what other people would think or say, would your choice differ? Do other people and trends affect how we see physical attraction? Does looking at popular influence rs and all other celebrities affect how we see everyone else? Are certain body types and hair cuts we are attracted to influenced by social media and what is hot at that given time. Is physical attraction affected by what is trending? Rather than what we are attracted to as individuals, there are so many of us on this planet we all have a mind of our own and different likes and dislikes yet social media does affect our likes and dislikes in a large way it’s the indirect peer pressure of sorts. Life is so interesting and diverse to look at physical attraction in such a singular way is boring to me, to find someone attracted simply because they have a certain body shape, style, facial features or hair type is boring and untrue, or at least it is for me. Now as a guy sure I have certain tastes and likes, a type so to say but I don’t allow that to influence my views in who I find physically attracted, sure I might notice someone first or more if they are my type. But if I keep myself centered and open-minded I can find someone who is the complete opposite of my type attractive. Imagine if the world was limited to one or two colours how boring would that be, so limiting yourself to your type or certain features you are also limiting your possibilities and options, and who knows if you were just slightly more open-minded or truthful with your self you could have found the right person for you maybe even your true love if you believe in true love that is. But those are my thoughts on physical attraction, the most important thing to keep in mind is to be honest with your self, because you may live for society and trends but society can’t live for you, you have to live for your self so don’t let others or trends tell you something you should know for your self. How many times have I looked at someone without knowing a single thing about them or even hearing their voice and found them attractive even when they are not my type or have any trending features simply because I am honest with my likes and dislikes. No one is saying find everyone physically attractive because that’s not right either, just be honest and open-minded about it. Physical attraction is the easiest type of attraction as it requires no reason or value you either find someone attractive or not is a simple process that should not require any more steps than that, you just know.
Another type of attraction ambition perhaps the most controversial type of attraction, your needs and want’s in life and how you can get or achieve them from someone else. Now personally it’s an attraction I do not care for but I am me and not everyone else, whether attraction through ambition is a good thing or bad is not for me to decide but for the individual and the majority. Morally I think it's wrong simply because no one likes to be used, and most who do agree or practice attraction through their ambition, those who are attracted to someone because of their social power, financial power or even their corporate power. Would not want to be used in return or others to look at them for that reason so I find that very hypercritical, I do think living a life without hypocrisies is impossible but at the very least we can try our best to have as few hypocrisies in our lives as possible. To me being attracted to someone simply because of what they have is a very shallow way to live, it's like living life like a candle in the wind eventually that candle will blow out. Money does not last forever it can be lost at any time, someone’s social ladder can topple at any moment and no one works forever. It’s a temporary attraction that normally only has one winner at the end of it, it’s an attraction that does not need love or emotions or any other kind of attraction, it’s a stand-alone attraction and a lonely and selfish way to live. Haha maybe I shouldn't of given my opinion on that kind of attraction, my viewpoints on it are quite set in stone, but the reason for it is simply because eventually, it will cause someone pain or harm while benefiting the offender.
What about a good sense of humor, most of us have different views on comedy but pretty much all of us are capable of finding something funny, enjoying a good laugh, comedy puts a smile on most faces but again we are all different what someone finds funny someone else will not. So even if someone is considered to have a good sense of humor by most there will always be one or two people who don’t think so. So this type of attraction is complete up to the individual and to what they consider to be funny or not and also how much funny a person can take or want in a day. Some people might want someone who is a child all day long while others want someone who is cable of being funny but only at opportune moments, and is serious the rest of the time. So what is a good sense of humor well you already know the answer to that that’s something we each know and can tell apart from a bad one or at least what we consider bad. Because it’s all about considering what we like and don’t like, some people like childish humor, while others like dark, rude and lewd comedy. So going for someone who is a child all day when you can’t stand childish behavior is a recipe for disaster or a pan to the head. So when going for someone base on their personality make sure you like it or can handle it daily. Because unless that person is willing to change for you or adapt to your liking, it will more than likely end badly one day, even if that person fits all of your other attraction criteria. Then comes the questions if its okay to make someone change for you, as we are all individuals and should be allowed to be who we are, so to conclude that kind of attraction it’s tricky as nothing remains funny or acceptable forever and some can only handle so much humor a day so just be sure a person’s sense of humor is right and acceptable for you.
Now past experiences play a role in attraction as well there’s not much to talk about on this as we all have different backgrounds and different experience in life, but experience does affect attraction because certain good and bad experiences will tell us whether a certain type of person is good for us or not whether we choose to follow that experience or not is another thing entirely. Because so many of us keep ignoring that voice in our head that says no. If we have had a bad experience with a certain type of a person it could stop us from finding anyone else like or similar to that attractive and if we have had a good experience with a certain type of person we would normally look for someone else like that.
Proximity is another form of attraction we forget exists but truth be told seeing someone or talking to someone daily could affect or change how we see them, maybe if that person was just passing through or by we would not give them a second thought but constant exposure to them could grow small feelings into admiration or affection, or perhaps no feelings into something. Proximity also affects who we realistically look for most people look for someone who is close by or in the general vicinity, because most don’t like challenges, and finding someone abroad is difficult, its hard to get to know someone simply through text or a screen because we are never truly our selves in front of a screen or behind a text we always try to show the best versions of our selves and sometimes a fake one. But attraction by proximity does limit our options to our area and surroundings who knows the wonderful or perfect person for us we could be missing simply because we choose not to look outside our own little box. But still even while I think distance should never be a factor when looking for love or someone you are attracted to, you should always be four times as careful and always keep your eye and mind open till you meet the person in real life when there is no screen between you. And yes cost also plays a factor as travel is expensive and borders play a role, but like the saying goes love finds a way. Now being attracted to someone biologically, what does that mean while to me it means being influenced by individual genetics, psychological, or cultural factors, as well as Sexual attraction. This requires no explanation, well I just don’t have one, genetics, I am not a scientist so it means nothing to me, psychologically we are all different and different experiences and things that happen in our life will affect this, what kind of people we grew up with and what kind of people left lasting impressions on us will make us look for someone similar. Culture plays a very big role and breaks or makes a lot of relationships, it depends on how adaptable and accepting both parties are. If both are accepting or willing to adapt to the other culture then it stops being a problem but all it takes is one to be forceful and want the other to change to their way of life to ruin a relationship. So yes culture plays a big role in attraction if you are forced to change or accept things you don’t agree with, it’s a lot easier to accept someone like you than someone different, but to me, difference is beautiful and fun as long as I can be myself and not forced to change who I am, or what I think. Now sexual attraction I am not going to touch on simply because we all have our own kinks and what we like, plus I am not sure how deep I’ll go if I start pun intended, haha plus its something you should already know what you looking for and if you don’t you will with experience and lots of it.
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