Repost this. Followers/Readers send numbers to your Ask. You write a fic/drabble using that line in your piece. Have fun! Expect a ton of requests!!Ā
āThatās starting to get annoyingā
āHey, hey, calm down. They canāt hurt you anymore.ā
āYou canāt just sit there all day.ā
āIām too sober for this.ā
āIām not here to make friends.ā
āI need a place to stay.ā
āWell, thatās tragic.ā
āYouāre seriously like a man-child.ā
āYou canāt banish me! This is my bed too!ā
āThe ladies love a guy whoās good with kids.ā
āSheās hiding behind the sofa.ā
āTheyāre so cute when theyāre asleep.ā
āIād kill for a coffeeā¦literally.ā
āYouāre getting crumbs all over my bed.ā
āGood thing I didnāt ask for your opinion.ā
āWhatās the matter, sweetie?ā
āI donāt want to hear your excuse. You canāt just give me wet-willies.ā
āIām bulletproofā¦but please, donāt shoot me.ā
āDid you just hiss at me?ā
āDo you really need all that candy?ā
āItās six oāclock in the morning, youāre not having vodka.ā
āI swear, Iām not crazy!!!ā
āThe diamond in your engagement ring is fake.ā
āHow is my wife more badass than me?ā
āBe you. No one else can.ā
āI havenāt slept in ages.ā
āI locked the keys in the car.ā
āAre you sure thatās the decision you want to make?ā
āYou work for me. You are my slave.ā
āTake your medicine.ā
āTheyāre monsters.ā
āWelcome to fatherhood.ā
āWhy canāt you appreciate my sense of humor?ā
āItās your turn to make dinner.ā
āThe kids, they ambushed me.ā
āSorry isnāt going to help when I kick your ass!!!ā
āStop being so cute.ā
āI feel like I canāt breathe.ā
āYou need to see a doctor.ā
āYouāre getting a vasectomy. Thatās final.ā
āI was a joke, baby. I swear.ā
āDogs donāt wear clothes!ā
āI didnāt think you could get any less romanticā¦ā
āSafety first. What are you? FIVE?ā
āThis is girl talk, so leave.ā
āWhere am I going? Crazy. Wanna come?ā
āThereās a herd of them!ā
āDo you think Iām scared of a woman?ā
āTheyāre not your kids, back the f*ck off.ā
āJust get home as soon as possible, okay?!ā
āYou smell like a wet dog.ā
āI could punch you right now.ā
āAre you going to talk to me?ā
āWelcome back. Now fucking help me.ā
āIf you canāt sleepā¦we could have sex?ā
āFlea markets donāt carry fleas, you know?ā
āHere, take my blanket.ā
āI donāt want you to stop.ā
āHow could I ever forget about you?ā
āYouāre bleeding all over my carpet.ā
āNot everyone is out to get you. Stop thinking that. Itās annoying.ā
āJust smile, I really need to see you smile right now.ā
āIām not wearing a dress.ā
āIām not wearing a tie.ā
āQuit beating me up!ā
āPlease put your penis away.ā
āItās a Texas thing.ā
āDonāt argue. Just do it.ā
āI hope Iām never stuck with you on a deserted island.ā
āDoes he know about the baby?ā
āI just ironed these pants!ā
āEnough with the sass!ā
āShow me whatās behind your back.ā
āIām not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor.ā
āFine, donāt say anything and make me worry.ā
āSTOP INTERRUPTING ME!ā
āYouāre not interested, are you?ā
āIām not buying ikea furniture again.ā
āTell me you need me.ā
āOh honey, Iād never be jealous of you.ā
āIām telling you. Iām haunted.ā
āI had a bad dream again.ā
āHave I mentioned, I fucking hate Halloween.ā
āItās Christmas, donāt be mad at me.ā
āYouāre not going to starve yourself on Thanksgiving.ā
āThe store ran out of Easter eggs.ā
āHow could you forget your sonās birthday?ā
āYou can only suffer through my whining for so long until you get up and make me a sandwich.ā
Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!!