˙⋆✮ They say having feelings for your brother's best friend is never a good idea...
But loving Jungkook feels like the easiest thing in the world.
He's been by your side for as long as you can remember, so it's only natural for you to feel devastated when your brother, Dohyun, tells you that Jungkook is about to get married.
For the first time ever, loving him doesn't feel easy at all.
paining: brother's best friend!jungkook × f!reader
cw: age gap (jk is 32, reader is 22 ops), tension, reader is WHIPPED, pining, initial unrequited love (my fav), eventual smut (adding new warnings when needed!!)
>>english is not my first language
chapter 11 | masterlist
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“So he knows now?”
Taehyung flips through the pages of the menu, looking strangely intrigued by the fact that the hotel is offering something other than its usual breakfast options. He takes his time deciding what to order, although you have a feeling he is mostly doing it to give you a chance to gather your thoughts. Last night, you received a message from him telling you that the two of you were having breakfast together the following morning, and apparently, there had never been any room for discussion. You had simply agreed, too tired and overwhelmed to argue.
“Yeah. Honestly, Tae, I don’t even know how I’m supposed to feel about it.”
You close the menu and set it aside, deciding on a fresh glass of orange juice and a stack of pancakes. Taehyung immediately settles on the same thing after taking another quick look at the menu. When the barista calls your names, your friend gets up to collect both breakfasts while you wait at the table. Once he returns, the two of you settle into a small seating area with a pair of soft, cushioned poufs, your plates balanced in front of you as the conversation picks up where it left off.
“Like… how am I supposed to act around him now?”
You pick up your knife and fork, cutting your pancakes into smaller pieces even though you are not particularly hungry anymore. Your hands seem to need something to do, and focusing on your food is easier than looking directly at Taehyung while you admit just how much this whole situation is getting to you. Taehyung taps a finger thoughtfully against his chin, his eyes drifting toward the ceiling as if he is carefully considering what might actually help you instead of simply telling you what you want to hear. Eventually, he takes another sip of his orange juice, letting the silence stretch for a moment before setting the glass back down.
“Well, honey, here’s the thing. What’s done is done.” He leans back slightly, watching you with an expression much more serious than his usual teasing smile. “You got your answer, and frankly, this probably isn’t going to go in your favor, especially since he never actually said anything about how he feels. So I think you should just enjoy your vacation and start letting yourself move on. Once and for all.”
His words linger in your mind, sinking in deeper than you’d like to admit. The worst part is that they actually make sense. Jungkook never told you how he felt. He never said that he felt the same way, but he also never directly told you that he didn’t. You have spent so long filling that silence with your own assumptions, convincing yourself that the answer must be obvious because it is easier to believe that he could never feel the same way about you than to keep holding on to a possibility that might not even exist.
To you, the simplest conclusion should be that he does not feel the same way. You have spent so much time trying to read between the lines, that maybe you have forgotten what it feels like to simply accept what is right in front of you. He loves Sophie and he’s marrying her. End of story. And yet, the doubt is still there.
It stubbornly lingers somewhere in the back of your mind, even when you know you should let everything go and finally make peace with the possibility that this was never meant to become anything more. You hate that a part of you still wants an answer you may never get, because without one, moving on feels less like a choice and more like something you are forcing yourself to do.
“I don’t know, Tae… I’m so tired.” you admit with a small, tired laugh, pushing a piece of pancake around your plate before finally taking a bite. “But honestly, a big part of me feels lighter now.” And it’s true. As much as the uncertainty still lingers, there is something strangely liberating about no longer having to carry the weight of keeping your feelings hidden. For so long, you had been trapped inside your own secret, constantly thinking about every word you said and every reaction you had around him, terrified that something would slip through the cracks and expose you before you were ready.
Now, at least, that fear has started to fade.
The feelings are still there, and so are the questions, but the constant pressure weighing on your shoulders doesn’t feel quite as unbearable anymore. You no longer have to pretend that everything is perfectly normal while desperately trying to keep your heart from giving you away. Maybe that alone is enough to finally let you breathe again.
“You know what’s crazy, though? You actually listened to me. I honestly didn’t think you’d go through with it.” Taehyung gives you a look that is somewhere between amused and genuinely impressed, as if he is still trying to process the fact that, for once, you actually took his advice seriously. You reach for a napkin from the table and slowly twist it between your fingers before crumpling it into a small ball. With a pout on your face, you throw it at him, watching as it hits him and falls onto the table. Taehyung barely gives you enough time to react before he grabs another napkin and throws it straight back at you, a grin already spreading across his face.
“I didn’t do it because you asked me to, just so we’re clear.” You give him an unimpressed look as you brush the napkin away. “Jungkook was driving me insane, and I literally just snapped.” Taehyung laughs, and you roll your eyes before finishing the last of your breakfast. Once you realize there is nothing left on either of your plates, the two of you get up from the table and make your way back toward the hotel, where the others are already waiting. You both know what today has in store. Bungee jumping. Jungkook’s idea, obviously.
You have never been particularly fond of heights, especially when you’re not the one in control of what is happening around you. There is something about bungee jumping that makes the whole thing even worse, because there is no clever way around it. You simply have to step off the edge and trust that everything will go exactly as it’s supposed to. By the time you reach the entrance of the hotel, everyone else is already gathered there, climbing onto the shuttle that will take you to the location. You immediately realize that you and Taehyung are, in fact, late.
“Where have you been?” Jungkook is the first to speak the moment he sees you, his voice carrying that faintly accusing edge that makes you raise an eyebrow. You pretend not to notice. Instead, you turn toward Taehyung and give him a light smack on the back of the head when you realize just how late you actually are. He had insisted only a little while ago that you were perfectly on time.
“Sorry,” you say, your voice coming out almost desperate as you quickly climb into the spot that has been left for you inside the vehicle. “We were having breakfast.” Jungkook gets in right after you, taking the driver’s seat, and while he fastens his seatbelt before starting the engine, you find yourself unable to stop looking at him. You are sitting in the row behind him, by the window on the right, which gives you an almost perfect view of his profile. His elbow rests casually against the armrest , while his tattooed hand keeps a steady grip on the steering wheel, his posture relaxed in a way that makes it easy to forget that you are supposed to be keeping your distance.
The cool air coming from the AC gently pushes his hair away from his forehead every now and then, while his sunglasses shift slightly on the bridge of his nose whenever he moves his head. You try to focus on literally anything else, but your eyes keep finding their way back to him, taking in every little movement without you even realizing you are doing it. Then, just as you are staring a little too openly, Jungkook turns his head toward your side. You immediately drop your gaze, suddenly very interested in whatever is sitting on your lap, the embarrassment rushing through you so quickly that you can feel your cheeks beginning to warm.
It disappears almost as quickly, though, when you realize who is sitting in the passenger seat. Sophie, of course. He must have been looking at her. You force yourself to look away from the front of the car, pretending that the sudden tightness in your chest means absolutely nothing as you settle more comfortably against the seat and stare out of the window instead. The drive takes you along a winding road that seems to grow steeper with every turn, the scenery gradually changing as you climb higher and higher. Around twenty minutes ago, you had started passing signs pointing toward the location where the bungee jump would take place, so by now, you know you must be getting close.
Eventually, after another particularly sharp bend in the road, the shuttle finally reaches the top of the mountain and comes to a stop at the meeting point indicated by the signs you had seen along the way. Everyone starts getting out, stretching their legs after the long ride as you follow them toward the platform. The structure itself looks surprisingly sturdy, which does very little to reassure you considering what you are actually supposed to jump from it. You approach the edge carefully, keeping a safe distance at first before eventually leaning forward enough to sneak a glance over the railing. Far below, a small lake stretches between the surrounding landscape, its surface looking deceptively calm from this height. You swallow hard. Suddenly, the idea of stepping off this platform feels considerably less appealing than it did when Jungkook first suggested it.
“Oh, God.” Hoseok closes his eyes, already looking like he regrets agreeing to any of this. His fear is strangely contagious, and before you know it, a shiver runs down your arms as you glance at him, suddenly wondering if you should’ve taken his reaction as a warning.
“Hi, everyone! I’m Thomas, and today I’ll be making sure none of you end up as human pancakes in the water.” You and Hoseok immediately go pale, while Taehyung snickers quietly beside you. You turn to shoot him a pointed look, silently reminding him that this is hardly the time to find anything funny. “Don’t worry, though. There’s only a one percent chance anyone gets hurt.”
Namjoon lets out an incredulous scoff, staring at Thomas as though he can’t believe those were the words he chose to reassure you with. “Why isn’t it zero?” he asks, his tone openly accusatory. “That’s not very reassuring, Thomas.” The instructor completely ignores him, continuing on as though the question was never asked. He gestures for all of you to follow him toward a set of narrow stairs leading up to a large metal platform–the place from which you’ll presumably be expected to throw yourselves into the air. You follow reluctantly, gripping the railing as you climb, each step making you increasingly aware of just how high up you’re getting.
“Couples bungee jumping is pretty much the same as doing it alone, except there’s always a chance you’ll end up going deaf from your partner’s screaming.” A muffled laugh catches your attention, and when you glance to the side, you find Amelia already facepalming. As Hoseok’s wife, she seems to know exactly what’s coming, apparently bracing herself for the inevitable string of complaints her husband is going to unleash the second he gets anywhere near the edge. Hoseok, meanwhile, looks like he’s ready to die. You try to push the instructor’s words out of your mind, but then it suddenly hits you. You’re an odd number of people. Your eyes instinctively sweep across the group, silently counting everyone again as though somehow the number might have changed since the last time you checked. It hasn’t. Taehyung and Namjoon are the first to be strapped into their harnesses, and the moment you watch the instructors secure them together, the last sliver of hope you’d been clinging to disappears. There’s no way around it. Someone is going to have to jump alone. And judging by how quickly everyone is already being paired off, you have a very bad feeling that person is going to be you.
When the first countdown begins, Taehyung keeps his eyes fixed on you, and it’s only then that you see his expression change completely, as if he suddenly realizes that, somehow, he had forgotten about you. “Wait–” He tries to stop everything, but it’s already too late. The countdown reaches zero, Namjoon jumps, and because the two of them are strapped together, Taehyung is dragged off the platform with him before he even has a chance to do anything about it. You probably would have laughed at the sheer panic on his face if you weren’t already terrified yourself. Your legs have started trembling beneath you, and the cold sweat breaking across your skin is enough to make you shiver. Your turn is getting closer. Hoseok disappears from your view, leaving you with the awful realization that there’s no going back now. If anything, watching him vanish over the edge only makes you more aware of what’s waiting for you.
You glance around, desperate for some kind of distraction, and notice Sophie and Jungkook talking a little farther away from the platform. As Jimin and his wife are being strapped into their harnesses, you slowly make your way toward them, finally getting close enough to see their faces more clearly. “It must’ve been something I ate last night…”
You think you hear Sophie mumble the words, and one look at her pale complexion is enough for you to put the pieces together. “Everything good?” you ask as soon as the two of them notice you approaching, just as the instructors begin calling the next couple over.
“I’ll see myself out of this one. I’ll just stay with Jin and–“ There’s a brief pause, and you notice Sophie’s eyes drift toward Jin, who is standing farther away from the platform. “–whoever she is.” She lets out a small chuckle, clearly amused by her own comment.
At the beginning of the vacation, you hadn’t known the girl Jin had shown up with at the airport, so you had simply assumed they were married. Judging by the playful, almost mocking tone Sophie uses when she refers to her, though, that clearly isn’t the case. You turn toward Jungkook, who has been unusually quiet through all of this. After a moment, he holds his hand out to you. “That leaves us. Wanna jump with me?” Your stomach drops at the question. You’ve never been the kind of person who enjoys things like this, and adrenaline rushes have never really been your idea of fun– especially when they involve standing hundreds of feet above the ground with nothing between you and the drop.
“I don’t know, Kook…” You look down at your feet, shifting nervously from one leg to the other. The harness you wore just a few minutes ago is already starting to feel uncomfortable, digging into your body the longer you stand there. You hesitate for another second before finally taking his hand. Jungkook smiles as soon as your fingers close around his, and somehow, that small gesture makes you feel a little less terrified.
Together, you walk toward the platform. With every step, your hands start shaking more. The instructor says something about staying as close to each other as possible, but you barely hear him. Your heartbeat is loud enough to drown out almost everything else. You keep your eyes fixed ahead, doing your best not to look down and imagine what the fall is going to feel like. Then you feel Jungkook’s hand settle gently on your shoulder. “Hey.” You look at him. “You’re okay.”
Before you can say anything, he pulls you into a tight hug. His arms wrap around you, holding you close as if he could somehow make the whole thing less frightening just by being there. You let yourself relax against him for a moment, your forehead nearly resting against his shoulder as you try to slow your breathing.
“Just look at me,” he murmurs. “You’ll be fine.” The countdown begins. One number after another. You know Jungkook is going to jump as soon as it reaches zero, and he’s not the kind of person who backs out. Somehow, that thought makes your stomach twist even more. Your eyes drift toward the empty space beyond the platform. The second you look down, your breathing turns shallow. You immediately regret it, your body reacting before you can convince yourself that there’s nothing to be afraid of.
Jungkook notices. His fingers brush gently against your cheek before he turns your face back toward him. “Trust me.” You barely have time to process the words before he jumps.
The fall is over before you even have time to process what’s happening. Everything moves so fast that you barely hear yourself scream, your stomach dropping as the wind rushes through your hair. When you finally manage to look at Jungkook, you notice his chest rising and falling rapidly. Apparently, you screamed a lot louder than you thought. He’s laughing. You glare at him as best you can while hanging upside down, still trying to recover from the fact that you just willingly threw yourself off a platform. Your heart is pounding so hard against your ribs that you’re starting to wonder if it’s ever going to calm down. The second your feet touch solid ground again, you make yourself a silent promise.
You are never doing this again.
.✦ ݁˖
It’s already afternoon by the time you decide to head back to the hotel pool instead of going to another beach. After everything that happened earlier, everyone agrees that spending the rest of the day relaxing sounds much better than finding somewhere else to go and dragging all your beach bags around with you. The elevator ride up brings back memories you had very deliberately tried to bury, and by the time the doors open, you’re already nervous about stepping into that pool again. Once everyone has settled onto the lounge chairs, you glance toward Jungkook. He’s staring out at the water, looking so focused that you can’t help but wonder what’s going through his head.
Your cheeks heat up at the thought that he might be thinking about what happened that day, and you silently curse yourself for not having shown a little more self control when you were in the pool with him. You really should have known better. You’re so caught up in your thoughts that you don’t notice Jungkook looking at you until you finally glance his way. Your breath catches. There it is again, that thought you’ve been trying not to dwell on. He knows you love him.
It isn’t exactly uncomfortable. It’s something harder to put into words, a strange awareness that makes you suddenly conscious of every little thing you do. The way you’re sitting. Where your hands are. What your face looks like. You start wondering if any of it gives you away to anybody else. If someone were paying close enough attention, would they notice how your eyes always seem to find Jungkook? Would they catch the way your attention shifts whenever he speaks? Would they realize that you like him so much that, at this point, you might not be able to hide it anymore?
You turn your back to him, only to find Taehyung struggling to spread sunscreen across his own back. The position he’s somehow managed to get himself into is so ridiculous that you snort before you can stop yourself.
“Here, let me help you.” You sit down beside him and rub the sunscreen into his back, starting gently before adding a little more pressure when you notice the stubborn white streaks still left on his skin. When you’re done, Taehyung holds up his hand, and you happily high five him. “Thank you!” By the time he says it, you’re already getting up and heading back to your lounge chair, settling in as the sun warms your skin again.
After a while, everyone heads into the pool. The heat has become almost unbearable by then, and the cool water feels like a relief against your skin. You let yourself float for a while, letting the water carry you as you finally relax. It doesn’t last long. Two strong arms suddenly grab you from behind and lift you straight out of the water, holding you like a princess for all of two seconds before tossing you back in. You resurface a moment later, sputtering as you push your wet hair away from your face. Taehyung is standing nearby, looking far too pleased with himself as he casually runs a hand through his hair.
“You seriously need to stop doing that, Tae.” You cross your arms over your chest, remembering that this is already the second time he’s ruined your attempt at having a quiet moment. Unfortunately, you’re nowhere near strong enough to get him back, and he knows it.
“No can do, sweetheart.” You freeze. The nickname sounds completely harmless coming from him, clearly nothing more than a joke. Still, hearing it in Taehyung’s voice makes your heart sink. Because all you could think about was Jungkook saying it instead.
Speaking of which, he’s now standing at the edge of the pool, facing you with both arms resting on the ledge behind him. He isn’t far away, close enough that you can tell he must have heard everything. His eyes stay on yours, dark and steady enough to make you a little nervous. You could swear you see his jaw tighten as he slowly exhales through his nose, but otherwise, his face gives nothing away.
And, ironically, he’s standing in the exact same spot where you almost kissed him.
.✦ ݁˖
It’s almost 9 pm when you all get into the elevator to head back to your rooms, though your group has had to split up since you’re clearly not the only guests leaving the pool. For some reason, you end up waiting for the elevator with Taehyung, Jungkook, and Sophie, along with a handful of other guests who seem to have had the same idea. By the time the doors finally open, there are already way too many people waiting, so once everyone squeezes inside, there’s barely any room to move. And, of course, because apparently your luck has been terrible lately, you end up wedged right between Jungkook and Sophie.
Great. Not awkward at all.
You focus on the numbers lighting up above the doors as the elevator slowly moves through the floors, keeping your eyes anywhere but on the person standing inches away from you. You’re halfway through the ride when a familiar voice makes you look up. Your eyes land on an elderly woman standing near the front of the elevator, and the second you recognize her, all the color drains from your face. It’s the same woman who interrupted you and Jungkook at the pool that day.
You freeze, and judging by the way Jungkook suddenly stiffens beside you, he recognizes her too. “Oh, hello, darling!” she exclaims, her face lighting up the moment she sees you. “How are you and your boyfriend? You two look just as beautiful as you did last time!” She points at you, then at Jungkook, as if making absolutely sure you know who she’s talking about, before reaching out and placing a hand on each of your shoulders.
You want the ground to swallow you whole and to never, EVER spit you back out. Before you can even think of something to say, Jungkook speaks first. “You see…” He scratches the back of his neck, clearly trying to figure out how to explain the situation without making things even more awkward. “She’s not my girlfriend. I’m actually getting married–” Another gasp cuts him off. The woman’s eyes widen, and before you can even process what he just said, she starts clapping excitedly, practically bouncing on the spot. “No way! Congratulations!” she exclaims, looking genuinely delighted. “You must be over the moon, darling!”
The elevator finally dings, and everyone starts filing out into the hallway. The elderly woman disappears down the corridor before any of you get the chance to explain that you’re not together and that she completely misunderstood the situation. You barely have time to process what just happened before you notice Sophie looking between you and Jungkook, her eyebrows slowly drawing together as she pieces everything together. You can basically see some form of realization hit her. Before you can make a quick escape– or even think of what to say– Sophie suddenly covers her mouth with one hand, her eyes widening as they fill with tears. A strangled gag escapes her. “Woah– Hey, are you okay?”
You barely get the words out before she turns and runs toward the room she shares with Jungkook, throwing the door open so hard that it slams against the wall before she disappears inside, eventually locking you out. “Babe?!” Jungkook takes off after her, dropping the bags he’s carrying as he fumbles desperately for the room key with shaking hands.
It takes him several tries before he finally gets it out. The second the door unlocks, he rushes inside. You and Taehyung follow right behind him, only to find that Sophie isn’t in the first room. Jungkook heads straight for the bathroom. You hurry after him and find them both there, Sophie bent over the toilet while Jungkook crouches beside her, gently rubbing her back as she throws up again, barely managing to catch her breath before another wave hits. The sight is almost enough to make you feel sorry for her.
After a while, her breathing starts to settle. She slowly lifts her head from the toilet and looks completely miserable. Her eyes are watery, her face pale once again, and strands of hair have fallen messily around her face. “What day is it today?” You answer before Jungkook can say anything, giving her the date. The moment she hears it, Sophie runs a hand through her hair, gripping it so tightly that you wouldn’t be surprised if she pulled some of it out.
“Holy shit.”
.✦ ݁˖
You are all gathered in the hotel lobby when Jungkook finally joins you, his face completely unreadable. Silence fills the room. No one says a word to him, and no one seems willing to be the first to break it, leaving everyone standing exactly where they are as they wait for Jungkook to tell you what happened after his quick trip to the pharmacy. The tension is almost unbearable. None of you are sitting down, and nobody seems to know what to do with themselves, so you remain frozen in place, waiting for him to speak. He looks at everyone first, his breathing uneven as his eyes move from one person to another.
Then they find you. They don’t leave yours when he finally speaks.
“Sophie is pregnant.”
───────────
author’s note:
i can’t believe this is actually happening you guys!!! BE PREPARED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER (and for a huge plot twist) YALL IM SOOO EXCITED 😩😩
anyway i truly love u from the bottom of my heart, tysm for reading and see u next time!💘
-> warnings. subby! needy!koo, pet names (bunny, love, etc.), reader gives JK a hand job
-> a/n. This is my favorite Chase Atlantic song 🫡
-> collection. songfics
-> started. Jul. 31st, 2021 @ 22:04
-> fin. Oct. 18th, 2021 @ 03:08
-> edited. Sun., Jul. 16th, 2023 @ 19:16
-> divider credit. @saradika-graphics
You scroll through Twitter, trying to wrap your mind around the fact that the man well over a million people thirst over on the daily is your best friend of almost 20 years, and currently wandering the halls of your home.
“Do you have an extra shirt?” Jungkook breaks through your thoughts.
"Yeah, I think so. Why?" you answer distractedly.
"Well, maybe if you'd care to spare me a glance, you'd know," he replies snarkily. You groan as you look up from your phone, about to start whining, but instead finding Jungkook smirking as your voice dies in the back of your throat.
Your mouth hangs open as you rake your eyes over his slim waist and up his abdomen to his chest and collarbones before you meet his eyes.
You jump up from the bed and open your closet, looking at your topmost shelf with a collection of clothes Jungkook has left around the house. Stretching onto the tips of your toes, you reach as far as you can, trying to grab a shirt laying at the top of the pile. You freeze when something hard presses against your back.
Jungkook reaches over you easily, grabbing a shirt and pulling it over himself. You turn around and watch as his muscles flex, swallowing a lump in your throat when you spot rogue droplets of water running down his body. You tear your eyes away from the waistband of his pants and meet his eyes, dark and hooded, boring into your own.
You push past him quickly, stumbling over your own feet as you make your way to the kitchen. "You hungry?"
"Definitely."
You roll your eyes at the familiar, smug lilt in his voice. "I swear you inherited Jin’s eating habits. I don’t remember you ever being this hungry." You shake your head.
"You’re just complaining because you’ll have to cook more," he says, sticking his tongue out at you when he joins you in the kitchen. You grumble to yourself, grabbing a wooden spoon and turning it around on him threateningly. Jungkook’s eyes widen as he lifts his hands up in surrender.
A smirk tugs at your lips. "Don’t tempt me into making you cook for yourself," you tsk at him, turning around with a smug expression and a flip of your hair.
"Your mom would disapprove of your manners," Jungkook rasps next to your ear. You turn around, ready to give him a mouthful about how his mother is the one who would be disappointed, but instead you forget how to breathe, because you find his face mere inches from yours.
Jungkook leans his hands on the side of the counter, caging you into the space between his arms. He smirks down at you, his eyes bearing a…glint to them as he tilts his head. "You were saying?"
"I—you… Fuck off," you mumble, pushing him away as a furious heat spreads across your cheeks, his teasing chuckles not helping in the slightest.
Flirting is new territory for the two of you. It’s partially your fault for getting piss drunk at his dorm while celebrating the end of their recent tour. The memory of getting so inexplicably drunk that you actually kissed him has you shaking your head shamefully.
You can’t blame yourself for feeling physically attracted to him after his nuclear-sized glow up, but you were so sure you had pushed those feelings away. For good. You suppose the amount of edits and unholy dancing the man does isn’t helping you, but still. You shouldn’t be feeling like this about your best friend.
Right?
"Y/N! Get your head out of the clouds, damn it!" Jungkook snaps his fingers in front of you, pulling you out of your daze.
You clear your throat and open your eyes wider. "Sorry, what were you saying?"
"I was asking." He glares at you pointedly. "If you’d like to join us at dress-rehearsal today. It won’t be as entertaining without you there, and the guys have been asking about you," he says, his eyes hopeful.
"Sure! I don’t see any reason not to." You set a reminder to get dressed into something more appropriate for going out. Jungkook (literally) jumps with joy, leaning forward to cup your face in his hands before placing a big fat kiss on your cheek.
"I’ll let them know. You won’t regret it, I promise!" he says excitedly, leaving you dumbfounded in the middle of your kitchen while he runs for the door, promptly shutting it after him.
"But… What about the waffles?"
—
"YOU DIDN’T EAT THE WAFFLES?" Taehyung yells, chasing the youngest around while threatening to hit him with his mic.
You giggle, sitting around the stage in the front seats and retelling the events of this morning, and why you had arrived late, leaving out… certain details.
Jungkook flings you in front of him, his cackle warming your heart. "TAKE HER INSTEAD, TAKE HER!"
"I refuse to be your meat shield! Fight your own battles!" you yell, shrugging JK’s hands from your shoulder.
He wraps his arms around your waist, holding you tighter. "You’re stuck with me, Y/N. You gotta help me," he whispers into your ear. You shiver, smacking his arm and threatening to help Taehyung beat the living crap out of him using very violent—
"Jungkook-ssi, you’re up!"
Jungkook grins. "Saved by the bell." He jogs off, running backstage to change into the clothes he’d be wearing on the night of the performance.
"Hey, we’re gonna go grab some drinks. You want anything?" Namjoon asks you curiously, checking his phone.
"Nah, I’ll be fine. Just get some banana milk for the bunny."
"Sure thing. Have fun!"
You shake your head as Hoseok and the remaining maknaes cackle mischievously. You wrap your arms around yourself, suppressing a shiver. You try to convince yourself that this is just some sweet, heartwarming performance, and that Jungkook isn’t gonna go all idol-mode on you and ruin your underwear.
You are wholly, wholly incorrect.
Jungkook’s laying on his back in the water, his eyes closed and lips parted tiredly from just completing an intense and captivating choreography. You swallow as you watch his already tight pants seem to tighten more because of the water, his thighs straining deliciously against the fabric.
Even his shirt hikes up slightly, some of his toned stomach on display for all to see. You shake your head. Clear your throat.
What are you doing to me?
"Y/N!"
You snap your head up, eyes blown wide and cheeks burning up.
"J-Jungkook." You’re embarrassed for both stuttering and having your voice break.
Jungkook smirks, flipping his wet hair out of his face and tilting his head at you. At first you think it’s cute, but then you realize he’s most definitely trying to seduce you.
"Are you alright? You seem a bit… flushed." He raises his brow with a teasing lilt to his voice.
"It was a great performance." You sit up from your seat, brushing yourself off and walking towards him.
He watches you like a hawk as you approach, eyes dark and hooded.
You lean up to whisper into his ear, "You were hot as fuck."
Jungkook inhales sharply, following your gaze as you pull away. He grabs your wrist before you can walk off, his grip loose.
You raise a brow questioningly. Jungkook exhales slowly, glancing pointedly at his crotch and then back to your face.
You immediately notice the tent in his jeans. You tilt your head to the side with a mocking devil’s grin.
"You need some help, Kookie?"
—
Jungkook slams you against the door. You manage a small yelp before his hands and lips are on you.
You groan into the kiss, the feel of his soft lips on yours intoxicating. You tug on his still-wet hair, your gut twisting when he groans deeply.
He moves his hand from your waist, sliding it lower to bring your leg up and around his hip, pulling you closer. Your stomach tightens as his…excitement presses against your abdomen.
You move your hand down his shoulder, sliding it over his chest and past his lower abdomen until eventually your hand cups his crotch. He lets out a breathy moan at the contact, dropping his head against your shoulder.
"You want me to help you, Kookie?" You palm him through his jeans, a shiver dancing across your arms as he pants against your shoulder. He groans lowly, and you smile.
"Ye—es, please," he whines. He presses his forehead against your shoulder, wrapping his hands loosely around your waist.
"Please, Y/N," he begs, his voice rising an octave in his desperation. You palm him again, and a pitiful whimper leaves his lips.
"Needy, aren’t you, love?"
He nods fervently into your shoulder, desperately wanting you to touch him. You chuckle, slowly bringing your hand to his shoulder, pushing him away so you can look at him. He looks at you with hooded eyes, desire burning bright in the depths of his irises.
You keep eye-contact going as you unbuckle his belt. Even as you’re unbuttoning his jeans, you refuse to break eye contact, slowly pulling down his zipper. You can tell he’s bothered from the way he licks his lips, blinking rapidly.
You lift your hand to his face, and he obediently follows its movement down, down…
He gasps when you slide your hand into his jeans, feeling him over his boxers. You grin and turn him around in one swift motion, his back up against the door.
His breathing increases in speed when you bring your hand up and then slowly down, past his underwear. You watch closely, enjoying the way his brow furrows in anticipation.
Jungkook moans heartily when you finally touch him skin-to-skin, throwing his head back against the door. He unravels when you pull him out, a little shudder shaking him as you flick your thumb over his head.
"Y/N," he pants.
"Y/N, please," he begs, sounding close to tears. He’s embarrassed at just how much control you have over him, but he embraces it completely when you finally start moving. He’s a mess under your touch, and he leans forward to bite down onto your shoulder in an effort to spare even an ounce of his dignity.
He’s hot and sweating by the time he finishes, quick to hide his face in your neck.
"Stay here for a second, okay?"
Jungkook only manages a grunt, walking to stand at the back of the closet, sliding down to lean against the wall. His mind is in a daze when you leave the room, confused.
His growing worry evaporates when you return with a wet cloth, closing the door quietly behind you.
You had already cleaned your hand, crouching in front of him to wipe him down. When you finish you put him away, zipping him up and cupping his face.
He leans into you, and you smile. You lean in and plant an infinite number of kisses all over his face.
"Before we have to get back and I inevitably have to explain why I didn’t head backstage to return my outfit," Jungkook begins, his voice low as he opens his eyes to look at you.
"Would it be wrong of me to ask if this meant you finally said yes?"
"Said yes to what, bunny?" You feign obliviousness just to hear him say it again. He swallows at the pet name, recomposing himself.
"Said yes to the fact that you’d want to be my girlfriend?" he finishes breathily, admiring you as you cup his face.
You giggle and shake your head, leaning in to peck his lips. "Yeah, Jungkook. I’ll be your girlfriend."
He sighs with a bright smile, turning his head to kiss your palm. "I’ll let the guys know. This calls for some celebration."
synopsis: jeongguk needs help with his prescription sunglasses. thankfully, his trusty optometrist is at one of his tour cities for a conference. the only thing you ask in return for the impromptu service request is for him to keep the sunglasses on during your assessment.
pairing: idol!jeongguk x fem optometrist!reader
wc: 8.4k
genre: fwb/situationship au, smut, fluff, angst
cw: eu arirang tour jk, flirting, banter, enamored fools, 67 obsession, slight jealousy, inaccurate optometry knowledge, 18+ ONLY, soft dom jk, pwp-ish (missie effects™ in motion), fingering, oral (f&m), backshots, mirror sex, full nelson, missionary, lots of kissing, biting (lovingly), multiple orgasms, creampie
a/n: can you see me? can you hear me and see me? or see me and hear me? testing..testing… late to the party but i’m here now!! jk decided to be a menace in eu, so ENJOY HIM BEIN A MENACE HERE ☆
Jeongguk [11:48 p.m.]: Can I see you tomorrow night?
You [12:05 a.m.]: ????
Jeongguk [12:06 a.m.]: Saw your IG story. Why didn’t you tell me you’re in Brussels? :/
You [12:06 a.m.]: Just here for an optometry conference.
You [12:07 a.m.]: Aren’t you on live right now?
You look at the tiny Weverse Live window on the corner of your screen where Jeongguk broadcasts from his hotel room in Madrid. He’s in his Calvin Klein denim jacket and jeans combo with no shirt on underneath. He smiles at his phone, all lovesick and gooey before he giggles and shakes his head.
He reaches over to his camera. “I’ll be right back, okay?”
The live ends, the rectangular window in the corner going black and closing out. In the same minute, your phone lights up with a familiar contact name.
“Yes?” You answer, adjusting your head on the fluffy hotel pillow and angling your phone further from your face.
“You were watching my live?” His melodic voice resounds with a chuckle.
“Was all over Twitter.” You lie.
“It’s X now. Get with the times, Doc.” He teases, toothy grin on full display.
You roll your eyes, back turning away from the nightstand’s lamp. Your phone automatically brightens and adjusts to the change, now accentuating all the features of the man before you. He looks the same as he did moments ago, situated in front of his camera for his millions of fans online. They’ve seen everything: his scar on his cheek, the smeared eye makeup, and glimmering piercings at the corner of his lip.
Though, they don’t get to see the way Jeongguk looks at you.
Eyes round and playful, you might’ve mistaken it for an enamored fool in love.
Look, it was never your intention to establish a “connection” with a patient, especially when it’s someone like Jeon Jeongguk. He didn’t initially see you as that either, purely seeking you out for vision care services and an introduction to laser eye surgery. After his first appointment and all the side effects you mentioned from the surgery without a guaranteed lifetime of perfect vision, he decided against going through with the procedure, and instead brave through contact lenses and glasses for the rest of his life. Plus, he’d actually have to see an ophthalmologist for that service, which was out of your specialty.
Not a hard reality to accept when he gets to schedule visits with you to check on his eyes.
Again, never his intention to hook up with his optometrist, but you were always so nice to talk to in the midst of his hectic schedule and lifestyle. In those short visits, he grew fond of you … as you did with him. Between the subtle flirting on his end and your quick-witted responses, after his sixth visit, he made an impromptu seventh visit the same week — strictly to see you for non-vision services … also where he made you fifteen minutes late for the rest of your appointments that day.
“I really can’t see you in Brussels?”
You roll your eyes, small smile playing at the corner of your lips. It’s not that you don’t want to see him … it’s just that when you do, it gets harder to part every time. You’ve already readied yourself for the two-plus year long tour, only sporadically meeting up when he’s in Korea.
The arrangement works for the most part.
Sure, there were lonely nights, but you think being in an actual relationship with Jeongguk would cause more issues in your life — a can of worms you’re not ready to open.
“I have long conference days and need to be up by 7 a.m.” You explain. “Wouldn’t work out with timing.”
You’ve always been the more factual one — no one can get hurt if realistic expectations are put in place upfront.
Even though your reasoning makes sense, it doesn’t stop Jeongguk’s theatrics. He huffs and plops down on his equally soft hotel bed with his arm slung over his eyes.
“So you hate me.”
You smile again, shuffling underneath the covers to get comfortable. The jetlag wore off after the first day, so you’re battling with real-time exhaustion from the day’s long itinerary. Jeongguk’s a night owl … well, actually, more like an insomniac — the man never sleeps.
“Aren’t you hot in that jacket?”
He lifts his forearm from his face, expression devoid of the dramatics from a few seconds ago as he grins. “What? You wanna help me take it off? I mean … if we meet up in Brussels, you can–”
“Nope.” You reply, smile growing at the sight of Jeongguk’s exaggerated pout.
The conversation shifts over to the weather in Europe and how it’s nothing like he’s ever experienced before — you concede, mentioning how you avoid going outside if you don’t have to, only enduring the heat when conference duties call.
“Mm, are there a lot of attendees at the conference?” He asks, coyness seeping in his inquiry directed at a certain someone. And when you confirm that, along with the mention of your clinic’s partnered optometrist in attendance, Jeongguk’s usual bright smile falters into a scowl.
“You always make that face whenever I mention Dr. Seong.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He feigns ignorance. “But you have to admit, he’s constantly interrupting our appointments.”
“To follow up on a patient’s chart. And that only happened twice.”
“Two too many.” He retorts.
There’s a pause in your conversation, where he stares at you like there’s something else he’d like to say, but decides against it. He resigns and rolls over to his side, head dipping into the hotel pillows as well, “I really can’t see you?”
You shake your head. “Timing doesn’t work.”
The truth was … there were also a plethora of things in this arrangement that didn't work neither you nor Jeongguk wanted to address.
Unwilling to go on a tangent of the relationship status, you change the topic, “Hey, don’t you have to get back on live? They’re waiting for you.”
His eyes soften at the mention of his world. Caught between the devotion to his work and fans and your glossy, slow blinking eyes, he stares back at his phone where you’re just as unattainable as he is to his fans.
“Yeah, I do.”
“Then,” you start, as you always do, “we’ll talk next time.”
Before he clicks the red “end call” button on his screen, you clear your throat, “Make sure you rest a lot, okay? And drink lots of water.” You pause, debating if you should continue your reminders. “Don’t forget to do those eye exercises before bed. Your condition’s important.”
You’re important.
He gives you that smile again — the kind right before he reluctantly tells you he needs to leave, feet still planted at your doorway.
“You always say the prettiest things after breaking my heart.” He teases. “Night, Doc.”
After the video call ends, you get a notification of his Weverse live. You decide against watching, going on Twitter (yes, it’ll remain as Twitter) in lieu of seeing the mass updates of his live. There were multiple screenshots, one capturing his unusual forlorn smile as he sets his phone down.
—
It was the second to the last night of your time in Brussels. While you enjoyed the conference and networking with other doctors, you were ready to go home. It was always busy back at home where tourists would visit the country for one sole reason. It’s no different now in another country, where thousands fly into this tour stop for the boys.
You drop your purse onto the small couch near the entrance of your suite, blazer thrown haphazardly over it as well. Fingers flying to your ears, you unclasp the backings of your earrings.
Ignoring your colleague’s message, you click into Jeongguk’s contact information and press the video call option. After the first ring, the frame freezes and a very visually distorted Jeongguk appears on screen. He’s saying something, but cuts off after every two words. Worse is his image glitching and his screen going black as a result of the poor signal.
“Jeongguk, if you’re saying something, I can’t hear you.” You say, plopping down next to your discarded purse and blazer. You reach down to slip off your heels, placing them on the side with the rest of the shoes you brought on the trip.
“Can-”
“-see–”
The call drops and you stare at your homescreen until your phone lights up again from his incoming call.
“Can you see me?” His voice blares through your speakers. “Can you hear me?”
“Now I can.” The exhaustion from socializing and sitting through hours of panels disperse at the sight of Jeongguk’s perfect face. You melt further into the couch as the angle of his phone sets on a coffee table. He sits forward to adjust the phone, silver chains dangling off his neck … the same ones you recalled grazing your shoulders when he had you bent over the last time he was in Seoul.
“Good,” he grins, “How are you?”
“Tired,” You answer honestly, “I just got back to the hotel.”
“I just got back from the concert too.”
“Yeah?” You settle back, tucking your legs underneath you as you lean against the armrest for support. “How did the show go?”
You know any performance held by BTS could only be exceptional. Knowing Jeongguk, though, his perfectionist nature will always find something to fixate or improve on. He offers a reassuring smile in confirmation of a decent show.
“Hey, so … I know it’s late and all, but I was wondering if you could come over?” He asks, noting your sharp exhale through your nostrils from his inquiry. “Before you say no, it’s sort of a medical emergency.”
At that, your face unconsciously twitches in concern. “If it’s an emergency, you should probably go to the nearest hospital.”
“Oh, ah, wrong wording.” He grins. “But it is medical-related. My vision, specifically.”
Your brows furrow, sitting up taller in your slouched position at the mention of his eyesight. He’s been your patient for over three years now, and his conditions matter a lot to you.
He continues, “So, it’s super sunny during our performances and my stylist got me some prescription sunglasses, but things look more blurry with ‘em.”
Well, that’s not good.
You frown, head tilting. “I’d recommend sticking to your current prescription contact lenses or glasses, then. Don’t know if they’re the correct prescription.”
Jeongguk inhales, worrying harshly at his plump bottom lip. Seems like that’s not what he wanted to hear from you. “Could you come over to just do a quick check on my eyes and the pair of sunglasses? Please?”
You check the time, counting the number of hours before your first alarm would go off. Though, it’s no use pondering. All your rationale has long exited the moment you picked up his call, and your fingers position the back of your heels to slip them on before you could verbally agree.
After all, how could you refuse a patient in need?
—
“Such a liar, Gguk.” Your breath comes out staggered and rough, all thanks to Jeongguk’s pressure on your body.
His doe eyes meet yours, a contradiction to everything he’s doing to you at the moment.
Back pushed against the nearest wall upon arrival, you didn’t get the chance to slip your feet into the extra disposable hotel slippers. Though, his good manners still persist even through the lust and desire to have you the moment you crossed the threshold of his suite, giving you a polite greeting before this transpired.
Being the polite boy his mother raised, he still asks, “Have you eaten yet?”
“Yes, around 6 or 7. Why?” You sigh into his touch, pleased by how his hand groped all the right places. Suddenly, he stills his movements and you feel his lips shift against your skin in attempts to mask a smile.
But you know Jeongguk and all the freckles on his back — you know him. Just like how predictable he is, and how the first thing he grabs upon meeting is the underside of your ass. He still lingers there, cupping the swellings through your slacks.
He lifts his head from your neck, proud of the wet sheen on your skin from his saliva. Nose scrunched in a playful smile, he tips his forehead against yours while his hands lift and drop one asscheek at a time. “Six, seven?”
“So immature.” You roll your eyes, muffling his laugh with a press of your lips.
“You love it.” He chuckles, unknowing of how your heart stirs at the mention of the L word.
“Was gonna order us takeout if you’re hungry.” He explains while his hand hikes up one of your legs around his waist. The action has you tippy-toeing to match the height difference; though, little energy is exerted on your end as he holds you close.
“You haven’t eaten?” You moan when he pushes his hips against yours in a delicious roll. You try your best to stay focused, the thoughts of him not having a proper meal post-concert has your stomach tensing uncomfortably.
He shakes his head while your fingers card through his short hair, the pads of your fingertips making contact on the glasses’ plastic ending. He has his sunglasses perched on the top of his head, bangs pushed back to expose his forehead.
“Not yet.” He murmurs against your lips, warm air exhaled after another needy grind. “I will soon.”
No brainer you eventually end up on his bed, which by the way, confirmed ten times softer than yours. He’s on top of you, hand down your pants and rubbing slow circles on your clit. You can’t help the dreamy sighs and soft moans when he presses down harder, changing up the angle perfectly that has you tensing. Though, a small part of you doesn't fully relax as a thought looms over you the more he marks up your neck. The sunglasses perched on the top of his head pokes at your cheek.
“I’m a bit upset at you.” You manage, hands bunched at his shoulders.
“Hm?” His round eyes come up to search yours, surprised at your change in mood.
“You know I have to be up early.” You frown.
You nearly whine out when he removes his hand and sits back up in a kneeled position. Pushing yourself up with your forearms, you half wonder if you should fix the button on your slacks at the ruined mood.
“Okay? Not like I don’t have to be up early either.” He mumbles, attitude detected in his tone.
“So we’re competing in the Suffering Olympics now?” You ask. “You tricked me into coming here.”
Jeongguk shifts and criss-crosses his legs, resting his elbows on the side of his knees as he leans in.
“I didn’t lie about my glasses.” He reaches for them and slides them onto the bridge of your nose.
Nothing was wrong with them — your surroundings darken like they’re supposed to, vision clear even with the added spectacles. They don’t pose an issue for someone with 20/20 vision, something Jeongguk doesn’t possess.
You slip the sunglasses off your face, fingers tilting the frames up and down. “Non-prescription glasses aren’t considered a medical emergency, Gguk.”
His expression falters. It was never his intention to coerce you into doing something outside of your boundaries. The tour has been rough on his physical and mental health, so it hadn’t occurred to him that he was being selfish in the midst of his desire for some respite.
“I wanted to see you.” He admits. “And you’re here for the same reasons, Doc.”
“I’m only here because I …” Your words trail as he looks at you with expectant eyes. Clearing your throat, you try to come up with a reason. “I care about your vision.”
He chuckles, biting down his smile before he leans towards you, body weight pushing you down again, “Admit it, you wanted to see me too.”
“I told you,” One. “I care,” Two. “About your vision.” Three kisses.
“Uh-huh.” He taunts while snaking his hand down your pants again. “You make these visits with other patients back at home?”
Your eyes narrow, hips lifting to assist him to take off your pants. Jeongguk sucks in a breath at the sight of your lacy thong, tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Wearing their favorite panties too?”
He runs his fingers over the thin cloth, taking note of how your covered clit twitches from the brief contact.
“Would you be jealous if I said yes?” You raise a brow, a soft moan when he presses down hard on your bundle of nerves.
“Wouldn’t be the first time.” His tongue probes against his cheek. “You know this.”
His jealousy is nothing short of subtle. The possessiveness was unwarranted given there’s no rule you were both exclusive. His good manners may have been taught, but his loyalty was something he emulated in life — expecting the same in his relationships. You nod, spreading your legs wider as he pushes your panties to the side to expose your soaked core.
He drops the attitude, foregoing it for his true feelings in this whole mission to see you tonight. “I missed you. ‘S why I lied, okay?”
The sky is blue, water is wet, and so are you — didn’t need a Dr. Seuss rhymery to tell you Jeongguk conned you over. You slip his glasses back onto his face, noting how he initially retracts his head back but leans into your touch. “These stay on till I say so, ‘kay?”
He complies with a quick nod, nose nestled close before pressing his eager lips to yours. He’ll have to bear through the sunglasses’ fog up, being mindful to not actually hurt you or himself in the process. Doesn’t matter though, as he trails kisses down your neck all while he rubs your pussy up and down with his four fingers.
Your blouse gets pushed over the top of your breasts, a matching set with your underwear. Whether or not this was planned (it was), Jeongguk grows harder at the sight. Granted, he was in the country briefly for the Busan show, but the timing didn’t line up, so he’s gone a total of two months without you.
He presses wet, messy kisses over your soft mounds, one hand already underneath you to unclasp your bra.Thanks to gravity, the bra cup slides up when the clasps click, exposing your hard nipples begging to be touched and worshipped by a willing Jeongguk.
He takes one in his mouth, teeth grazing the small bud, eliciting a sweet whimper.
You were right to be hesitant on seeing him knowing the teasing would span throughout the night in an attempt to savor this precious moment. He always made you feel good — an arising problem for you now that you can’t seem to replicate these feelings with anyone else.
You watch his tongue dart out, flicking faster on your nipple before he wraps his mouth over it to give it a hard suck. He repeats the action, working you up and pulling his hand away from your pussy every time you try to grind harder against it. Every time he returns to your pussy, the wet clicks grow in tandem with your pleas for him to move quicker.
“Jeongguk–don’t tease …”
He releases your nipple, warm breath meeting your wet skin as he chuckles. He kisses down your torso, glasses slipping lower on his nose bridge where you could see his long lashes kiss the top of his cheeks.
You reach down, fingers hooking on the sides of your panties to rid them off your body.
He sits up on his knees, line of vision flickering between your face and dripping center.
“Can you see me?” You ask, lust clouding your brain. The ache gathers at your center from the visual of Jeongguk wetting his pouty lips, piercings also glimmering in the process.
He tilts his head, brows pulled together in an attempt to take in his slightly darkened surroundings. Somehow you still light up everything around him, making you the focus point of his world.
When he doesn’t answer, your hand drops between your legs, middle finger automatically finding the button that sends a surge of relief after being neglected. He groans, finally scooting down and dropping on his stomach.
“Lemme taste you, Doc.” He kisses the underside of your thigh, reveling in the way your hole clenches from his request. You hum, fingers moving faster on your clit. You clench and a small bead of your arousal trickles from your hole, begging to be licked up.
Keeping his eyes on your face, Jeongguk nears once more, kissing one of your pussy lips before spreading them apart for a drag of his tongue over your entrance.
“Oh god.” You sigh, fingers moving faster over your clit as he inserts his tongue into your hole with little resistance. He does the same thing he did with your nipples, flicking the tip of his tongue fast over your entrance and sticking what he can into your heat.
No matter how he angled his head, the glasses remain a barrier between his mission to properly taste you. Impatient, he pushes at the back of your thighs, causing your hips to lift higher and legs spreading wider. Pussy in full view, he spits over your digits, watching you smear it over your slick folds.
You didn’t want to come over for this reason, knowing Jeongguk took his time. He enjoyed drawing out your pleasure for the sake of his own — wants nothing more than to make you come undone, whether it be through a new or old experience with you.
Perhaps if he learned more about your body, he’d get a better understanding of your heart.
For now, the only pathway to your heart is in the form of him thrusting his tongue into your hole, savoring your moans and cries. The action is so intense, you had to remove your hand from your pussy in favor of grasping the pillow under your head for support.
He lifts and drops your hips to create a motion that has you whimpering and crying into the open space. Jeongguk has his air conditioning set to the lowest temperature — as he should with the insane European heat. And despite the air conditioned room, the heat continues to climb with everything Jeongguk plans to do with you.
Still, sweat gathers at his hairline and trickles down his sideburns as he groans into your pussy. He spits, sucks, and praises into your sex.
“Missed this pussy so much — all mine tonight, yeah? Gonna take such good care of it.”
“All yours.” You moan soft and sweet, disappointed you can’t see his eyes through his shades in confirmation of your answer.
He slips two fingers into your hole without warning — none needed as the stretch removes the ache between your legs. They’re so thick as they pump in you, curling each time as he pulls out. The speed builds as does the sucking and licking motion on your swollen clit.
“Mm, d-don’t stop, I’m so close.” Your mouth drops, breath hitching as he complies and continues the motion as requested. “You’re gonna make me cum, baby.”
He grunts in compliance, tongue moving in fervor over your heat. He doesn’t care how messy the half of his face is with his saliva and your juices — doesn’t care about how the sunglasses distorts his vision of you.
He deserves it for how he got you to come over.
It won’t be your first and last orgasm anyway. He plans to prolong the limited time he has with you and etch every part of this encounter in his memories till he can see you again.
“Gguk, I-I’m cumming,” you rasp, tensed thighs quivering in his hold. “God, yeah.” Chin tilted up, your eyes shut at the first strong clench, pulsating around his digits faster as you unravel.
He lets out a pleased sound, hips driving into the mattress at your body withering beneath him. You twitch after a final lick and purposeful suck on your clit, lightheaded from his wet mouth dragging up your body.
He presses his needy lips on yours as a reward for his job well done, leaning into the light scratches from your almond-shaped nails. He whines and groans against you, keening when you slide your hands up his shirt.
Your hands knead his chest, smiling into his lips when his pleased sounds reach your ears. The glasses knock against your cheek — a reminder of the annoying barrier. But god, did Jeongguk look good in them.
“Hate these glasses. Can’t see you.” He breathes, teeth pressing down over his pump lips to conceal his desperate moan at your fingers closing in on his hard nipples.
“You want them off?” You ask with hooded eyes. Predicting his answer, you quickly shake your head. “Too bad. It’s what you get for tricking me.”
He hikes one of your legs over his waist, the angle and grind so delicious on your bare sex. “Come on.” He rolls his hips harder, knowing full well your arousal will dry and mark white on his black balenciaga pants. He’d proudly wear these pants tomorrow during soundcheck, unwashed and all.
You shake your head. “Lay down for me.”
The pressure ceases almost too quick for your liking — a surprise honestly as Jeongguk preferred taking the lead. The rare display of compliance serves to prove his devotion to earn your favor again.
As if it was ever lost to begin with.
He lays down next to you: neck flushed, lips pouty, and pants tented — waiting for your next move. You sit up, ridding yourself of whatever article of clothing you still have on before you slot your body in between his legs.
Jeongguk swallows and exhales a shaky breath at the sight before him. It’s been months without you — lonely nights spent thinking about you and how you were doing, if you were doing anything … or anyone, for that matter. Work keeps him busy and while he loves spending time with his band members and fans, they just weren’t you.
You silence his thoughts with a swift move of your hands, pushing the end of his shirt all the way up to tuck underneath his chin. He likes the feel of your hands — always craved for it even before everything transpired between you two. The cold touch on his hot skin takes him back to the times spent in your clinic whenever you tilted his head into the phoropter, and your laughter after he tells you all the different lenses looked the same when you asked if it’s ‘better or worse.’
His vision gets infinitely better when he gets to see you.
Which is why these sunglasses must go. He knows he deserves this “punishment,” so he’ll entertain your demands.
You lean down to press a dainty kiss on the corner of his lips, one which he failed to catch in your pursuit down his body. A soft smile on your lips as you trail kisses on his chest and torso just as he did with yours. “Keep your eyes on me, Gguk.”
He swallows, the action pushes his Adam’s apple uncomfortably against the bunched cloth at his neck. You can’t see through the shades, but you’d imagine him with wide brown eyes taking the scene before him. His chest trembles from another pant when you run your hand over his covered bulge.
Pants unzipped and flaps pushed to the side, his grey Calvins display a darker patch in between — a target marked for your kisses. When he rewards you with a pretty sigh, you pull down the front of his boxers to release his hard cock. Everything about Jeongguk has always been pretty. Outside of his playful demeanor, his kind personality exudes beauty. Naturally, his physical features follow the same path.
His cock? Oh so pretty, but you’re able to coax out another level of beauty with your touch.
Taking his thick length in your hand, you kiss the underside of his cock, tongue running softly over a prominent vein. He exhales roughly through his nose, head dropping momentarily onto the surrounding pillows. You make your way up and down his length, always stopped at the tip with a small kitten lick that has him panting.
You told him to keep his eyes on you — never said anything about needing to keep his hands to himself. Unrestrained, his hand intrinsically guides itself to the back of your head, pushing you down the same time his hips thrust upwards for some added contact. Your lips stay sealed shut, unwilling to fully take him just yet.
“Wanna feel your mouth so bad, Doc. Please?” He tilts his chin to his chest, the usual pleading eyes you’ve grown used to are concealed by the sunglasses.
Wordlessly, you crawl closer to his body, head lowered in an illusion to comply with his request. He waits with bated breath, letting out a whimpered moan when you let a dribble of saliva trail over the tip before you run your thumb over it.
You hum, squeezing the tip to ease a small bead of precum at the opening. Greedy, you lick over the heady arousal, endeared by Jeongguk’s soft praises to continue.
You do this two more times, observing his exhales and his hand’s pressure on the back of your head. “I was so nice to you and this is what I get? Cruel.” He exaggerates a pout, hoping you’d give into his play.
“Sure, so nice of you to trick me.” You rest his cock on the side of your cheek just shy of your mouth, turning to kiss the flushed head again.
“You still came.” Literally, in both senses. “Don’t I deserve something good in return? I even showered for you.”
“Wow, bare minimum hygiene after a three hour concert? I’m so romanced.” You tease.
Romance.
While you’ve never asked for nor hinted at the necessity of it, Jeongguk’s never subtle with his attempts. Like the flowers he sends over to you and a full lunch spread delivered to your clinic’s staff as a “thank you” after one of his many appointments. Dangerously romantic whenever you’ve visited his place for a quick hookup only to land in his kitchen moments after as he cooks for you — shirtless, back full of your nail marks and neck littered with hickeys he’ll have to conceal. He cares a little too much about your life, droopy eyes fighting to stay open after his long schedule, but confirms his interest in your musings with an introspective follow-up question.
Heedlessly, he gives and gives — you wonder if you’re enough as a return.
Jeongguk returns a cheeky smile, face still angled at you as you finally give in and envelop your mouth around his tip.
It’s not romance; yet, it’s something akin to romantic when Jeongguk thumbs your jaw after you run your tongue over his slit, coating his bare skin with more of your saliva.
“Oh god, yes.” His chest stutters, rising the same time you suction around him. “Missed your mouth.”
You can’t reply as you bob your head up and down half his length, the other half tugged by your hand with a small twist to your wrist just the way he fancied. His whines grow when you replace your mouth with your hand, lips trailing over his length again and dropping lower where you take one long stripe over his balls. He tenses, hips lifting up when you attempt to take a testicle in your mouth.
“I love when you do that.” He sighs. Again, that L word. The impact of the simple word punches your guts, and you suck and lick over his balls with a blind urge.
After a couple minutes of teasing him, you make your way up to the head of his cock again. Eyes never leaving his fucked out face, you jerk over him quicker with your tongue pressed over his slit. He jerks up, cock pushed into your mouth out of habit and lust. You look at him with relaxed eyes, jaw going slack despite the sudden recoil and force of his hips.
“Go ahead, fuck my mouth how you need.” You encourage.
One of his brows raises and tongue darts out to wet his lips as he questions your offer. “How bad do you want my cock, hm?”
Like nothing you’ve ever wanted before — like how you’ll know the soreness the day after will be all you think of, because the pain reminds you Jeon Jeongguk was there.
“Tell me.” He urges, both hands coming to cup your jaw, positioning you just right for him to slip past your lips once more.
Your response’s inaudiable, gagging around his thick shaft when the tip meets the back of your throat. Still, you answer through one hand braced on his hip bone, while the other snaked in between your legs to rub hard circles on your sensitive clit. You answer with a determined expression, eyes fluttering shut when he repeatedly thrusts upward.
Like the back of your throat, another discomfort runs through your pussy from the sound of Jeongguk’s labored grunts. Your knees widen in accommodation for your hand, two fingers gliding past your entrance. You angle your wrist, fingertips hitting a spot you only discovered after hooking up with Jeongguk.
Jeongguk lifts his head, head tilted to look behind you. Unbeknownst to you, a body length mirror resides on the side, giving him the best view of your play. He lets out a pained groan, hips bucking up the same time he pushes your head down.
You grow wetter by the second, arousal on your fingers catching the hotel’s lights. Lord knows Jeongguk appreciates every bit of the bright settings despite his usual abhorrence with lights. He needs to see more of you — desperate times call for desperate measures.
He isn’t ashamed of begging.
“Can I take off the glasses? Please? I’ll do anything.” Funny how he expects an answer with your mouth stuffed full of him. You remove your fingers from your sopping hole, both hands planted on his hips to restrain him from thrusting up.
He releases his hold on your head, cock also slipping out of your mouth in the process. Panting, you nod and fight the giggle at the sound of the sunglasses when thrown carelessly onto the nightstand nearby. You almost think the glasses shattered from the impact, but the Saint Laurent frames should withstand a little more than most.
You should’ve known how much of a liar Jeon Jeongguk was when he promised he'd do anything.
Yeah, he’ll do anything, alright … anything he wants.
He has you both at the edge of the bed now, facing the mirror completely nude. Turned away from him, he wastes no time positioning his cock at your pussy. You steady yourself with your hands on his knees, arching forward from his feathered kisses on your shoulder. He spreads his legs wider in his seated position — his hand squeezes and drags his cock through your folds. With one hand, your fingertips graze his own to aid and ready yourself for the sink down.
Home’s more memorable — within grasp … well, he’s in it now: enveloped and welcomed in your warmth.
“Fuck yes,” Jeongguk sits back, hands propped behind him as he watches you lift and drop on his length. “Can you see me, Doc?”
You look up at the mirror, the surrounding area shifts with every movement on top of Jeongguk. You see your fucked out face, breasts bouncing, and the accentuated creases between your hips when you sit your ass down harder on his lap.
You hardly see Jeongguk.
“N-no.” You pant, chin touching your shoulder to look back at him. The contact of your ass on his lap produces a rhythmic slapping sound, overshadowed by your breathy moans.
Butterflies flutter dangerously at the pit of your stomach from his deep chuckle and his arms coming to wrap around your midsection. You still can’t see him, but the dark colorful lines on his tattoo sleeved arm remain a steady trademark of the man behind you.
Your brain withstood years of memorization in optometry school, you didn’t need to see Jeongguk to remember what he looked like. Eyes closed, you memorize the shape of his lips peppered on your exposed nape and shoulders. Lips thinner than most, they still pout the prettiest and fullest on your skin. You shudder, hips grinding against his cock nestled deep inside you.
His perfect nose presses into your skin after a rough exhale.
“Damn. That’s a problem, huh?” He spreads your legs apart, taking note of the translucent liquid trickling down his length and over his balls — a mixture of you and him.
“Uh-huh.” You concede with a nod, looking over your shoulder to catch him staring at you with unadulterated hunger and need.
“‘Too bad.’” He mocks. Strong arms hooked under the backside of your knees, Jeongguk tilts you backwards while his own back meets the soft mattress.
“Oh!” You whimper from the changed position, thighs folded snug at your torso while the back of your neck is propped by his hands. Your hands land on his forearms for some support. It’s not the first time Jeongguk has put you in a questionable position, but the Full Nelson was a new one. Even for someone who does pilates two times a week, the position puts an uncomfortable stress on your poor muscles. One look at the mirror has you forgetting about the discomfort at the visual of his tentative thrust into your pussy.
“The hell?” Jeongguk snorts, warm breath meeting your neck and words straining as he pushes his hips up again. “ChatGPT said this position was supposed to feel good.”
Thing is, it does feel good, but you’re not going to confirm your enjoyment. You’ve shown your unwavering disdain for his AI usage, always putting up a stubborn fight to prove its unreliability. With a roll of your eyes, you huff. “Should stop relying on it, Gguk. You know that’s why–mmh, global warming’s–oh fuck.”
Another playful laughter erupts as he finds a rhythmic pace, maneuvering you on his length. “I know, I know.” He slows down, afraid the position might accidentally make his cock slip out from your heat — the last thing he wants. “Just entertain it a bit for me, yeah?”
You whimper a small okay, head clouded by the mirror’s reflection. It’s plain filth how you grow even wetter after every shallow thrust.
Your moans are different — strangled and unreserved. Jeongguk’s well-versed with your body. Knows your left leg’s slightly more flexible than the other without reason. It’s why he eases on the pull in mercy for your physical limitations.
Romance.
“God, I wish–” He grunts, letting one of your legs drop to the mattress in favor of his free hand rubbing over your swollen clit. “W-wish I could see you.”
The statement itself was a self-made issue. No one forced him into this predicament — similar to his prominent status in the industry. He’s been told all his life what he can and can’t do. Every action scrutinized by the public’s eyes; consequently, every minute interaction with another celebrity could be misconstrued as a romantic relationship or unprompted beef.
The constant surveillance weighs heavy on his soul and drives him into these moments of “selfishness.”
Like seeing you tonight.
It’s a risk every time he’s with you, knowing full well how the media and some of his “fans” sabotaged many of, if not all, his pursuits to find genuine connection with someone. Celebrities aren’t privy to this level of treatment … but there’s more at stake knowing your medical career is on the line every time you make the conscious choice to see him.
To the world, he’s Jeon Jungkook. On certificate, in his patient’s chart, the name you call out most in the shared space was Jeongguk. A small part of his brain likes to conjure the thought of you knowing him more than what he outwardly displays to the world.
“Tell me what you see.” He urges with another harsh drop on his length.
You force your eyes open, a small whine leaving your lips from the arousal coating Jeongguk’s length every time he pulls back. “We’re,” you swallow, “we’re making a mess.”
“Yeah?” His free hand runs on the exposed area of his length not currently inside you, gathering the slick essence before bringing it back onto your clit. “How messy?”
He fucks into you again, smearing a fresh layer of the mixed juices on his cock once more. He repeats the action of transferring the shared arousal on you with no regard to how lewd your sound grows as the minutes pass.
“So fucking messy.” You answer.
Pleased with your answer, his hips speed up and hand leverages your head for a better view.
“I-I’ll cum again if you keep doing that, Gguk.” You warn, mouth dropping at the erotic view. It’s a shame he can’t see any of this, but he’ll consider this a tradeoff for the folded pretzel position you’re currently in.
“Good. That’s what we want.” He husks. “So cum on my cock. I know you can do it.” His hand moves quicker on your wet sex, matching the speed at which he thrusts into you from below.
The leg propped on the side begins to shake, followed by the arch of your back, you break out of Jeongguk’s hold as you cum hard around him. The action slips his length out from your clenching pussy, but Jeongguk wraps an arm around your middle in his pursuit to work you through your orgasm.
You sob at his flattened fingers moving vigorously over your pussy. The orgasm consumes and overtakes all your senses — so intense, it draws away the sensation of his teeth sinking into your shoulder.
Your nails dig into his wrist, hinting at your sensitivity. The visual of the overhead lights move the same time Jeongguk shifts your body to the side with him into a spooning position. His tongue soothes over the bite mark as a silent apology.
None was ever needed, but your stomach flips with every wet kiss to your nape. His big hands roam all over your body, the feathery touches has you pushing back against his still-hard cock. He giggles and lifts his head to place a tender kiss on your cheek.
The tenderness puts you on your hands and knees: ass up, face down.
Bed dipping as he nears from behind, his breath hitches when he spreads your cheeks apart to reveal your messy pussy. He thumbs at the entrance, watching your fingers curl on top of the bedsheets.
“Gonna keep staring or …” You press, head turned to the side to catch a glimpse of Jeongguk.
He tilts his head just enough to make eye contact, hooded eyes fixed on yours as he puckers his lips before letting a dribble of spit run down your center. The warm liquid cascades down your ass first before meeting his thumb where he smears over your already wet entrance.
“Gonna be good and let me take you from behind?” He asks with a raised brow.
“Uh-huh.” You nod. His hard act crumbles at your soft smile. “‘That’s what we want.’”
He huffs a laugh and buries himself deep inside you once more. It’s true — you both want the same things: for him to fill and fuck you to the shape of all the unspoken feelings.
He’s missed home.
You’ve missed him.
His fingers dig into the meat of your ass at the leisure pace he thrusts into you. Slow, when he wants to feel how your walls clench around him. Fast, so his balls slap against your pussy. One of his hands holds your shoulder so you don’t move from the hard thrust, keeping you in place. Your hand flies back to hold the hand he has on one of your asscheeks.
“That’s it, fuck, you’re so perfect.” He praises. “Taking me so well, baby.”
You can barely answer him through the skin to skin slapping and your stuttered moans. The sudden strong recoil and thrust has you planting your entire front onto the mattress. His body follows along with yours as he shifts his weight on his forearms, sweaty chest meeting your back.
The light kisses he trails down your temple was a stark contrast to the way his hips piston to your plump ass, drawing out guttural moans from your lips. A hand comes to cup your chin, the other hand covers your eyes. They say the removal of one of your senses heightens others. You hear his labored grunts, palm at the soft sheets, smell the notes of his Chanel perfume, and taste the victory of a forthcoming orgasm. Something has shifted. Reality is, your whole life has always revolved around the importance of sight and vision.
And though small, the corners of your mouth dip.
“What’s wrong?” He husks into the shell of your ear, hips slowing to hear your answer.
“I–” You moan at his deep, slowed thrust. “I can’t see you properly.”
Haven’t been able to since the start of his tour schedule.
You’re quite literally under him right now and it still feels like he’s too far away for reach. And even as he’s balls deep inside you, Jeongguk remains untouchable. The distance increases when he slides out of you, pussy already missing its fullness just as you always miss him a little more each time he leaves you.
Your shoulder knocks on his chest as you turn, eyes immediately locked with his hooded ones.
“Hey, Doc.” He preens your hair from your face and nudges his nose against your own.
“Hi.” You breathe. The airiness in your greeting earns a light press of his lips on your cheek, skin memorizing the pleased curves and the metal piercings.
“This better?” Lifting his head, you gaze at his softened eyes and trace the slope of his nose down to the tiny mole underneath his lips.
You answer with your legs wrapped around his waist, eager for the distance to decrease. He doesn’t take his eyes off you either, not when he finally slips his cock back into your warmth with matched gasps and wanton sighs.
He tips his forehead onto yours, mouth going slack after a harsh pant. You were always going to end up like this — rightfully under Jeongguk’s starry eyes.
“God, you feel so good.” He licks into your mouth, all primal, similar to when he first greeted you at the door. “Love your pussy.”
There he goes recklessly throwing that word around. It pricks your skin, has you digging your nails into his back as he continues to fuck you. You pull away from his lips, panting hard as your body jerks from his thrusts.
Just as Jeongguk knows you, you also know he’s close. His schemes to see you stretched beyond his exaggerated health conditions, going as far as extending this meeting to the best of his abilities. Why else would he have you folded and pressed into different positions that don’t require seeing your face?
Knowing this, you tuck away your pride and utter words meant to be hidden.
“I missed you, Gguk.” A soft kiss to his chin just shy of his mole. “Every single day.”
All’s fair when he’s unknowingly used a word that fucks with your heart and brain — only natural you do the same too. Head dropped to the crevice of your neck, his other hand finds and holds your waist in place as he thrusts one final time before finishing inside you. He curses, teeth biting on your shoulder as he ruts into you, trying to push deeper if that were possible.
“Fuck,” he breathes a chuckle into the small space, body slumping over your frame. His hips move ever so slightly, fucking his cum deeper inside you. “So cruel.”
Was it cruel of you to reveal your true feelings? Was it cruel of you to finally have him cumming as an aftermath? Though, there’s no greater cruelty than how life worked out between you and Jeongguk.
But this arrangement works, right?
Giggling, you cup his jaw, bring him back to face level, and place a tender kiss on his willing lips.
“Not cruel.” You exchange breaths with him, the pressure of your lips increases with each comforting kiss. “Had my assistant expedite some prescription sunglasses on my way over. Mr. Lee knows where to pick them up.”
He groans, hips slow in its buck, he expresses his gratitude with his hand on your pussy.
“You’re the best. Always so good to me.” He kisses your sweaty temple as he brings you to another gentle orgasm.
Late into the night, he lays with his cheek pressed flushed on your chest, eyes fighting to stay open as your fingers run through his sweaty locks.
“I miss home.” He confesses, arms wrapping tighter around your body. The fancy tour suites will never beat the feeling of home. Being at home hurts differently when he’s under heavier public watch — at least it’s familiar. At least he has his dog, mother’s cooking, and friends to run to.
He’d like to think he also has you.
It’d be cruel to offer him words of comfort knowing what you’re about to do next adds to his longing for home, so you soothe and rub the expanse of his back.
You don’t stay for long — you can’t. There’s only a small window of time for you to make your escape before fans or paparazzi catch wind of your relation to Jeongguk. You wouldn’t be surprised if your identity has already been mentioned among the threads of his sasaengs. It’s a fear you haven’t discussed with Jeongguk, nor want to dwell on.
At the door, Jeongguk sports a small frown at you putting back on your heels.
Fixing the strap of your bag on your shoulder, you offer him a soft smile, tippy toeing as you place a dainty kiss only for him to melt further into it.
“Come see me when you’re home, okay?” You say with round eyes.
His eyes soften, never wanting to admit how his home is about to leave him right now.
“I will.”
fin.
a/n: beta’d by the loveliest @lovieku ♡ OCEANS OF GRATITUDE AS ALWAYS!!
alas… my back hurts thinking about the full nelson. do lmk your thoughts on my first idol!jk fic!! 🤓
Author’s Note: Hey everyoneeee!! 🫶 What a quick update compared to before lmfaoo. Please feel free to comment your thoughts and opinions! 💬💗 Enjoy! ✨📖
word count: 6k
🏠︎ ⬅ ➡
🔔 Chapter Six— Bells
“I didn’t know we still had this…” you said softly as you looked down at the dress lying across your lap.
Your mother's wedding dress.
Your fingers traced the lace around the neckline and sleeves, noticing the small stitches that had come undone over the years. Being compressed inside a suitcase had done its own damage to what had once been a beautiful white gown. Now, the dress that had probably cost hundreds, if not thousands, was covered in a light yellow discoloration.
A part of you felt bitter. How could a dress that was as expensive as it was end up like this? Being packed away shouldn't have caused it to discolor... right?
“Sweetheart... it's a beautiful dress, but I'm sure your mother would have wanted you to get a new one,” Mrs. Jeon said softly, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.
Mrs. Jeon had brought the dress out for you to see. She wanted you to know it was still there, hoping it might inspire you while searching for your own wedding dress. Every dress you tried on the other day wasn’t it. Too tight, too long, too loose, too folk like. Nothing fit, nothing worked and you started to feel helpless.
Mrs.Jeon could tell you were tired and so she wanted to show you the dress, see if it could bring any ideas to what you want in mind.
Seul couldn't take her eyes off you. She could tell you were struggling. Old memories had resurfaced, pulling you back to a place that should have felt light, yet somehow only felt heavy.
“My mom would want me to get a new dress. I know that for sure,” you said quietly before letting out a single chuckle. “Her dress... isn't my dream, and she never wanted me to build myself around who she was. She wanted me to be my own person.”
She had always encouraged you to embrace who you were and never feel limited by life.
Which was a little ironic, considering hers had been cut so short.
Again.
There it was.
That bitter thought.
“But my parents aren't here on my wedding day...” you continued as your eyes slowly filled with tears. “It's stupid, but I feel like... wearing this dress would make me feel like she's here.”
Silence settled over the room, broken only by the quiet sound of your sniffles.
“I think we should custom make a dress.”
Seul's voice interrupted your thoughts.
Mrs. Jeon and you both turned to look at her. Your eyes were already filled with tears, while Mrs. Jeon's were fighting to keep hers from falling.
“It's such a beautiful dress, but... I don't think it's you,” Seul continued. “I think you should use this dress to make a new one. One that's you, but still has Aunt Haeji with you. Maybe use the lace and some of the silk.”
She knew you well enough to know that this idea was perfect for you.
But why hadn't you thought of it?
“That's perfect,” you said, looking over at Mrs. Jeon before offering an almost fragile smile. “I think I want to do that.”
You hoped she wouldn't mind you altering the dress.
“Yeah... I think that's a wonderful idea,” Mrs. Jeon replied softly before getting to her feet. “I actually have a tailor I can call to get everything started.”
You quickly wiped your tears before looking down at the dress again.
But this time, only one thought filled your mind.
"Hah..."
The quiet sound caught Seul's attention.
“You okay?” she asked, leaning forward.
“Yeah... it's just...” You turned toward her before continuing. “I went through all the clothes and... I never saw this dress. Where was it?”
You didn't really expect her to know the answer.
The surprising part was...
She did.
“Well... that day we were all packing, Jungkook found the dress in one of the suitcases. He took it to Mrs. Jeon. He thought maybe you'd want to consider wearing it.”
You blinked.
“But... Why not just show me? Or ask me? And how do you know this?”
Questions spilled out one after another.
“I'm not sure why he didn't tell you,” Seul admitted. “But I know because I saw him carrying the suitcase out. I asked him what it was, and he said it was your mom's wedding dress. He thought it'd be safer here.”
She gestured around the large house.
You hummed softly as you thought back to that day.
To his quiet gestures. To how naturally considerate he seemed. In a strange way, it warmed your heart. He had put the dress aside for you. Because if you really thought back to that day, you probably would have donated it.
Not because you didn't love it.
But because every time you looked at it, it reminded you that while your parents had chosen each other freely, you never felt like you had been given that same choice. Now that the idea of your choices settled, you could look at the dress more clearly and want to keep it. Even the remnants that will come after you create your own.
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“Hey... Dad's asking if you want eggs.”
The voice that pulled you from your thoughts belonged to none other than Seul.
Yesterday, you had decided to stay at Uncle Jae's house. It made the most sense. He would be walking you down the aisle today, and Seul was your maid of honor. Being close to them felt comforting, and somehow, spending the night there had helped you slow down and breathe.
You thought the nerves were gone. You were wrong. The closer today came, the more nauseous you felt.
“Yeah, sorry. I'm coming,” you replied, getting to your feet before making your way to the dining table, where your aunt and uncle were already waiting.
You smiled at them before taking a seat and reaching for the kettle in front of you, pouring yourself a cup of tea.
“Big day today...” Aunt Nina said as she sat beside you, placing a few slices of toast onto your plate.
You couldn't help but laugh, shaking your head as you looked down at the table.
“Yeah... a little too big,” you joked.
“Listen... I know all of this is nerve wracking, but it'll go well. I'm sure this marriage will be one of the best things to happen to you,” she whispered softly as she stroked your hair before placing a gentle kiss against your temple.
You turned toward your aunt and smiled warmly.
You knew her optimism came from experience. She had arranged to marry your uncle.
Well... somewhat.
Their story had always been a little gray.
The two families had known each other for years, and everyone understood they were meant to marry one another someday. Naturally, feelings developed. After all, who else were you supposed to like at ten years old when you already knew you were expected to marry your father's friend's son?
“Thanks...” was all you managed to say.
There simply weren't any other words left.
At this point, everything you had been feeling had already been shared with someone else. You were exhausted from the emotional back and forth, from feeling okay one minute only to spiral the next.
“And if things don't work out, then I can just move in with you and Jungkook,” Seul joked as she placed the eggs in front of you before sitting down beside you. “I'll create the divide.”
You rolled your eyes playfully before taking a bite of your breakfast.
“Besides all the joking, we have a lot to do today,” Uncle Jae said as he took the last remaining seat at the table. “We have a wedding to prepare for.”
“Yes, but sweetheart, you focus on yourself,” Aunt Nina added encouragingly. “Getting ready. Making sure everything is okay.”
You nodded in response before taking a bite of your toast.
“So... is Mrs. Jeon coming today?” Seul asked, choosing her words carefully. “To help you get ready?”
“I don't think so,” you replied with a shrug. “I mean, I told her I didn't need help getting ready. I have you guys, so... yeah.”
You weren't entirely sure whether Mrs. Jeon planned on stopping by.
You were like a daughter to her, and everyone knew it.
While everyone felt a little uneasy about the arrangement and the circumstances surrounding your marriage, Mrs. Jeon seemed almost over the moon.
At least, that's how your family saw it.
Not in a bad way. Just in the sense that she had never hidden how excited she was. You didn't mind.
Seul did.
Ever since you returned home, Seul couldn't shake the feeling that Mrs. Jeon unintentionally acted as though you no longer had family.
Yes, your parents have passed away.
But you still had people who loved you.
They were sitting around this very table.
To Seul, it sometimes felt like her family was being overlooked, as though they weren't an important part of your life.
“You okay?” you asked, noticing that Seul had drifted off into her own thoughts.
“Huh? What?”
She blinked before quickly shaking herself out of it.
“You're the one zoning out this time.”
“Yeah... sorry.” She smiled sheepishly. “I guess it's just nice having you to ourselves today.”
“That is true,” Aunt Nina chimed in with a nod.
You knew everyone was on good terms.
But there was still a quiet bitterness lingering beneath the surface, simply because you had been placed under Mr. and Mrs. Jeon's guardianship all those years ago.
If there was one thing you were grateful for, though, it was that no one had ever taken those feelings out on anyone else.
They accepted the situation for what it was and chose to move forward with grace.
Which was exactly why you encouraged Mrs. Jeon to stay with Jungkook today.
To focus on her son instead of worrying about you.
Because you were home too. You were surrounded by family.
And somehow...
Both places still felt like home.
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“Now remember, son, you need to finish organizing all the files by tonight and email me the presentation for the conference, alright?” Mrs. Jeon said as she grabbed her keys from the side table in the Han house.
Your house.
“And remember to finish your book report and essay too, okay? Good grades will take you a long way,” she added as she slipped on her heels and headed toward the door after saying goodbye to your mother, Haeji.
Jungkook was staying over at your parents' house for a few days. He would be sleeping in the guest room while his parents attended a work conference alongside your father, Jihoon.
“Yeah, I'll make sure everything gets done,” he replied, as respectful as ever, before bidding his parents goodbye.
Haeji walked over to Jungkook and placed a gentle hand on the sixteen year old's shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze before waving goodbye to her husband.
“Ugh... those two,” she muttered, rolling her eyes.
Jungkook turned toward her with a small smile, already knowing exactly what she was about to say.
“It's too much, son. All this homework you have to do, and they're piling company work on top of it? Come on, let's get dinner ready,” she said, leading him toward the dining table where his textbook and laptop already sat open.
“Y/N! Come downstairs!” she called toward the second floor as she set three plates onto the dining table, which was already covered with small side dishes waiting to be eaten.
“Coming!” you yelled back.
Haeji brought over the bowls of rice, the bulgogi, and the kimchi jjigae before helping Jungkook close his textbook and laptop. She carefully carried them over to the kitchen island to clear some space on the table.
“It looks really good, Mrs. Han!” he said, looking down at the food, his stomach practically rumbling with anticipation.
“Well, you better eat a lot! Growing boys need lots of muscle, so eat plenty of meat, okay?” she said as she placed a generous serving of bulgogi onto Jungkook's plate before serving your own.
“Oh... you're here?” you asked as you walked into the dining room, taking a seat beside your mother.
“Yeah. My parents and your dad went to a conference, so I'm staying here for a few days,” Jungkook replied before taking a bite of the bulgogi with some rice.
“Cool! Where's Junghyun?” you asked, looking around as if expecting him to suddenly appear from another room.
“He's at university sweetheart. Remember?” your mother reminded you as she finally took her seat.
You nodded slowly, not really remembering, but accepting that your mother had probably told you at some point.
“Hm... I forgot.”
Haeji smiled to herself before turning back to Jungkook.“Jungkook, I can help you with your book report after dinner, okay?” she offered.
It wasn't really an offer. She already knew what his answer was going to be. Just as you were like a daughter to Mrs. Jeon, Jungkook had become like a son to her.
“It's okay, Mrs. Han. I don't want to bother you,” Jungkook replied politely, exactly as she expected.
“Nonsense,” she dismissed with a wave of her hand. “It's only a book report. It'll go by much faster if we do it together.”
Jungkook couldn't help but smile.
“Thanks, Mrs. Han.”
“You're welcome, sweetheart. Now eat before everything gets cold.”
He nodded obediently before taking another bite, earning a satisfied smile from Haeji as she finally began eating too.
"How many hours did your mom give you today?" Haeji asked as she scooped another spoonful of rice into her bowl.
Jungkook thought about it for a moment. "I have to finish the presentation, organize the client files, write my essay, and my book report."
Haeji finally took her seat, setting her bowl down as she looked at Jungkook, one brow raised.
"You're sixteen."
Jungkook blinked, unsure how to respond.
"You're supposed to be stressing over exams and after school programs, not presentations."
He let out a quiet laugh. "Dad says it's better to learn now."
"Your father means well," she replied gently. "But don't grow up too fast. Focus on making the basketball team. I know how much you love playing."
Jungkook smiled to himself.
"Actually... I made the team last week."
"You did?" Haeji's eyes lit up.
"And..." he scratched the back of his neck, looking a little embarrassed. "They made me captain."
You looked up from your bowl immediately.
"Captain? Really?" you asked, your eyes widening. Even though sports had never been your thing, you knew that was a big deal. Especially after you hadn't made the soccer team and spent weeks pouting about it.
Haeji's face broke into the proudest smile.
"Jungkook, that's wonderful!" she said, genuinely excited. "Congratulations, sweetheart."
He couldn't help but smile back.
"Did you tell your mom and dad yet?" she asked.
The smile on his face faded just a little.
"No." He looked down at his bowl, pushing his rice around with his chopsticks. "Dad doesn't really want me doing too many extracurriculars. He wants me to focus on my grades, so... they don't even know I'm playing basketball."
The table fell quiet for a moment.
Haeji reached across the table and gently patted the back of his hand.
"I'm really proud of you," she said softly. "Not because you're captain, but because I know how hard you've worked for it."
Jungkook looked up at her, surprised.
"You deserve to enjoy being sixteen too."
A small smile found its way back onto his face.
"So..." Haeji said with a playful grin, lowering her voice dramatically. "Until you're ready to tell your parents..."
She made a zipper motion across her lips.
"My lips are sealed."
You immediately gasped.
"Mom! You're helping him keep secrets?"
She laughed.
"I'm helping him celebrate first.
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People didn't know it, and they certainly couldn't see it, but when your parents passed away, a part of Jungkook died too.
There were many times when he looked at your mother as his own. Sometimes, if he was honest with himself, even more than his own.
Haeji helped him with his homework, reminded him to eat properly, and always asked about his hopes and dreams. She wanted to know what made him happy, what he wanted to do when he grew up, but most importantly, what kind of person he hoped to become. It was a kind of care he wasn't used to.
His own parents loved him. There was never any doubt about that. But their love often came in the form of expectations. Good grades. Company work. Preparing him for the future. The future that was already decided for him.
Haeji simply wanted him to be happy.
When he was home, there was also Ms. Kim, the family's longtime housekeeper. She fussed over him just as much, making sure he had eaten, reminding him to rest, and quietly taking care of him in ways that often went unnoticed.
Jungkook loved his mother.
He always would.
But sometimes he wondered if he would ever have the same sense of comfort and security with her that he felt with Haeji or even Ms. Kim.
When your parents died, Jungkook grieved in silence. He cried when no one was looking. He missed them terribly.
But more than anything, he had to stay strong.
Strong for his own mother.
Mrs. Jeon had stopped eating properly. Some days she barely left her room, and others she simply sat in silence, staring into nothing. Losing two of her closest friends had broken something inside her.
So Jungkook buried his own grief.
If his mother was falling apart, then he had to be the one to keep her together.
Even if it meant carrying his own heartbreak alone.
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Jungkook took one last look around the house before slipping the keys into his pocket.
It still smelled new.
Fresh paint, polished hardwood floors, untouched furniture. Every room looked as though it had come straight from a catalogue, waiting for someone to finally make it feel lived in.
He had bought the house only a few weeks ago. Not because he needed a new place to live. Because if the two of you were going to start a life together, he wanted it to be somewhere that belonged to both of you. Somewhere neither of you had memories tied to. A fresh start.
His eyes wandered back toward the master bedroom.
The double bed he had originally ordered had been exchanged for a queen. A second dresser now stood opposite his, and nearly half of the walk in closet sat empty, waiting for your clothes.
It felt... strange.
Not in a bad way.
Just unfamiliar.
For the first time in his life, he had to think about someone else's routines. Someone else's belongings. Someone else's comfort. The realization made everything feel a little more real.
He stepped out into the hallway, passing neatly stacked boxes filled with kitchenware, decorations, and little things that still needed to be unpacked after the wedding.
Junghyun was waiting near the front door, scrolling through his phone until he looked up.
"You done?"
Jungkook nodded.
"I just wanted to make sure everything was ready." Junghyun glanced around the empty house before smiling.
"It looks good."
"I hope she likes it. But then again, if she wants to, she can change whatever she wants"
His brother looked at him knowingly. "I'm sure she will. Women always want to add their touch. Or make sure yours isn’t seen" He joked, letting out a laugh.
Jungkook let out a quiet breath and looked back toward the bedroom one last time. "I don't even know if she's going to sleep in there tonight."
Junghyun chuckled. "That's your biggest concern?" He asked, raising a brow.
"I mean..." Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck. "We're getting married today, but we weren’t ever together romantically so... I don't want her to feel uncomfortable."
"So what are you going to do?"
"If she'd rather have the room to herself..." He shrugged. "I'll take one of the guest rooms. There's no rush."
Junghyun smiled to himself. "See? That's why I knew you'd make the right decision."
Jungkook frowned. "What does that mean?"
"You've been thinking about what she needs from the very beginning."
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“Oh... everything's just...” Sunhee whimpered softly, her voice catching in her throat before she could finish. Fresh tears welled in her eyes as she looked around the familiar home.
It had been two years since the Han family's accident.
A year earlier, you had moved to Toronto to start a new life. Knowing you had no plans to return anytime soon, Mrs. Jeon, Sunhee, had taken it upon herself to begin sorting through the Han house. Donating what could be donated, packing away what should be kept, and slowly preparing the house to be emptied.
No one had stepped foot inside since the day your parents died.
Everything had been left exactly as it was.
The framed family photos still rested on the shelves. Your father's reading glasses remained on the coffee table beside the newspaper he never got to finish. Your mother's cardigan still hung neatly over the back of one of the dining chairs.
It was as if they had simply stepped outside and forgotten to come home.
Sunhee's breathing grew uneven. Silent sobs escaped her lips as she sank to her knees, burying her face in her hands.
Jungkook looked down at his mother while his father gently rubbed circles against her back, trying to comfort her. Junghyun stood quietly nearby, his eyes wandering around the house, unable to find the right words.
Jungkook felt his own throat tighten. He held back the tears threatening to fall.
His mother was hurting. He needed to stay strong for her.
“It... it's all the same,” Sunhee whispered through her tears. “Everything's exactly the same.”
Jungkook closed his eyes for just a second. One tear escaped despite his efforts. He quickly wiped it away before anyone noticed and quietly lowered himself onto the dusty couch.
The silence stretched for several minutes. Eventually, Sunhee managed to steady herself. She wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her cardigan, before taking a shaky breath, and giving a small nod.
“Let's... let's start packing.”
Her husband silently opened one of the empty cardboard boxes they had brought with them, folding the flaps into place before handing another to Junghyun.
Jungkook looked around the house once more.
Something about this felt wrong.
His eyes drifted from the boxes to the photographs on the wall. To your mother's favorite vase sitting by the window. To the staircase that led to your bedroom.
His chest tightened. ‘What are we doing?’
He understood why his mother wanted to help. He really did. But ‘Shouldn't this be Uncle Jae's decision?’ His gaze lingered on the staircase. ‘Or more importantly...Y/N's?’
Jungkook stood up, clearing his throat to catch his family's attention before making his way toward his parents.
"We shouldn't be doing this," he said quietly.
Sunhee looked up at him, confusion written across her face. "What do you mean?" she asked.
Jungkook glanced around the house before gesturing toward it."This... isn't our place." He paused, searching for the right words.
"This isn't our home. And as much as they were family..." His voice softened. "There are other people who should be doing this before us."
His father frowned. "Don't be ridiculous, son. If someone else wanted to empty the house, they would have. No one stepped in."
Jungkook knew where his father was coming from. He wasn't being insensitive. He was trying to protect his wife from carrying this burden alone.
"I know," Jungkook said gently. "Maybe they're just... not ready." He looked back toward the staircase. "But forget Uncle Jae." He swallowed. "What about Y/N?"
Silence settled over the room once again.
Junghyun lowered his gaze, unsure whether he should say anything.
Jungkook continued. "I know she's not planning on coming back and I know being here probably reminds her of the worst day of her life." His eyes wandered across the family photographs still hanging on the walls. "But that doesn't take away her right to say goodbye."
His voice dropped to almost a whisper. "Or decide what happens to her home."
Junghyun finally spoke. "Jungkook's right." Agreeing with Jungkook, he stepped towards him and gave a slight squeeze to his shoulder.
"What if one day she comes back?" Jungkook asked. "What if she wants to keep some things? What if she wants to live here? We should give her that choice."He shrugged. "We can't make that decision for her."
Then, after a brief moment of silence, Junghyun added with a grin, "And... I'm pretty sure it's borderline illegal with the whole will situation."
The comment earned a small laugh from both of their parents, breaking some of the heaviness in the room.
Sunhee looked around the house once more. Her eyes landed on Haeji's cardigan still hanging over the dining chair. She slowly set the cardboard box back down."You know what..." she whispered, wiping away another tear. "You're right."
Mr. Jeon looked around the room before giving a quiet nod. "We'll leave everything exactly as it is."
He wasn't preserving a house. He was preserving a memory.
Because if Haeji had left anything precious behind...It was you.
This was about making sure that when you were ready...You could come home one last time. .
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“You look beautiful…” Jae said, tears welling up in his eyes as he looked at you fully dressed, make up down and hair made.
You looked exactly as your mother did when she was getting married and he felt like he was taken back in time.
You slowly lifted your gaze to the mirror.
For a moment, you didn't recognize the woman staring back at you.
The gown seemed to catch the day light, its layers of soft ivory tulle falling effortlessly to the floor in a full, flowing skirt that moved with the slightest shift of your body. It was elegant without feeling overwhelming, almost as though it had been made to float rather than walk.
The bodice hugged your waist before blooming into the skirt, its sheer illusion fabric embroidered with delicate floral lace that climbed gracefully across your torso and sleeves. Tiny petals and embroidered vines stretched over your shoulders and down your arms, the intricate details making the dress feel timeless rather than extravagant.
Your fingers brushed over one of the embroidered blossoms near your waist. Some of the lace had been carefully taken from your mother's wedding dress.
The tailor had preserved every piece he could, weaving it seamlessly into the new gown. It wasn't immediately obvious to anyone else, but you knew exactly where those pieces were. A section of lace along the sleeves. Tiny fragments of silk hidden beneath the layers of tulle.
“I…yea I look pretty good.” You aligned softly, turning back and seeing your friends smiling widely as Seul realigned the veil, fixing it for you.
Your uncle took a tissue from nearby and pressed it gently against his lower lid as he tried to contain himself. The little girl who he watched crawl, walk, run and had moments of being a menace, she was grown. Getting married and he couldn’t be happier for her. Knowing Jungkook, who he was. Your uncle knew he was right for you even if you couldn't see it yourself.
“Oh my gosh, this dress is stunning and you just look gorgeous” Maya said as came closer to give you a gentle hug and shortly after Jennifer joined as well, making it a gentle and light group hug. No one wanted to ruin the beautiful dress or crinkle it.
“Sorry to interrupt but it’s time!” The wedding coordinator interrupted, as they knocked on the door.
It was time. You were ready. Almost at least.
You took one last look at your dress and thought back, back to your mother.
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A warm summer afternoon. The smell of freshly cut grass drifting through the open kitchen window. Your mother hummed quietly to herself as she folded laundry.
Then, without looking up, she smiled and said, "Everything happens for a reason, sweetheart."
You had groaned dramatically. "Mom... that's such an old person thing to say."
Haeji laughed. "Maybe." She folded another towel before looking at you. "But when life falls apart, don't spend all your time wishing it hadn't."
She reached over and gently tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "Take a breath." Her smile was as gentle as ever. "Then start picking up the pieces."
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"Sweetheart? "It's time." Uncle jae said, a small smile plastered to his face as the girls behind him smiled warmly in encouragement.
You nodded slightly and hooked your arm with his. Getting ready to walk down the aisle.
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Jungkook stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the cuff of his sleeve for what felt like the tenth time. The suit fit perfectly. Everything did.
The tie, the watch, the polished shoes.
Yet none of it settled the nervousness sitting in his chest.
His fingers paused over the cufflink. Almost instinctively, his mind wandered back years earlier.
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"Mom?"
The kitchen was quiet except for the gentle bubbling of doenjang jjigae on the stove. Sunhee looked up from where she was chopping vegetables. "Hm?"
Seventeen year old Jungkook leaned against the doorway, his school blazer slung over one shoulder.
"Can I ask you something?"
She smiled immediately. "When have you ever needed permission?"
He let out a quiet laugh before stepping into the kitchen. "Dad keeps saying that one day I'll be the man of the house."
Sunhee paused what she was doing. "And?"
"What does that even mean?" He shrugged, asking. This was something his father often said to him and Jungkook didn’t quite understand why he kept saying it and what it exactly meant. "Does it mean I have to make the most money?"
She smiled, holding herself from laughing at the naive young boy who was curious but dense at the same time. "No."
"Then... does it mean I have to take over the company?"
She shook and nodded her head at the same time.
"No.. and yes. There’s going to be a day where you'll take over but that’s not what your father means."
Jungkook frowned. "Then what is it?" He asked, sitting down on the bar stool, leaning against the counter of his mothers kitchen.
Sunhee set the knife down before turning fully toward her son. "It means people should feel safe because you're there."
Jungkook looked at her, confused.
"I don't mean physically. A man doesn't become the head of a family because he's the loudest. He becomes someone people can lean on."
She smiled softly. "Someone who listens before he speaks."
She reached up, brushing a loose strand of hair from his forehead. "Someone who protects without making people feel weak."
Jungkook stayed quiet.
Sunhee chuckled at the young boy who still and clearly didn’t understand.
"You know..." she said. "Your father thought being the man of the house meant carrying every burden by himself." She glanced toward the living room where Mr. Jeon was reading. "It took him years to realize he didn't have to."
“Well you both seem to carry the burden. You both are stressed all the time!” He said, rolling his eyes jokingly.
She laughed softly and shook her head, “we’re not! But what your father means to say…when you get married” She smiled knowingly. "...don't think your job is to lead your wife. It's to walk beside her."
Silence settled between them.
Before she took a seat next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, continuing "You don't have to solve every problem. You don't have to pretend you're never scared. You just have to make sure she never feels like she's facing those problems alone."
Jungkook sat quietly, letting her words settle. He understood them. At least, he thought he did.
But he was still just a seventeen year old boy.
Marriage felt like something that belonged in the distant future, a life so far away that he could not picture it. His mother's words were comforting, but they were also difficult to grasp when he had never loved someone, never built a home with another person, and had never carried that kind of responsibility.
So he simply nodded, tucking her advice away somewhere in the back of his mind.
"Now, enough of all this." She lightly flicked his forehead. "Go finish your homework before your father thinks I've turned you into a philosopher."
Jungkook laughed. "Yes, ma'am."
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You walked down the aisle, looked around and saw everyone who loved and cared for you. Except two people but you knew they were there.
You looked down the aisle and saw him. Jungkook, standing there. You could tell he was just as nervous as you and for some reason, that made this easier. Made it easier going down that aisle and meeting him.
Uncle Jae and you stopped in front of Jungkook and the minister. They exchanged a quiet look. No words were needed. In Jungkook's eyes, Uncle Jae saw a promise. In your uncle's, Jungkook saw trust. It was enough.
Your uncle lifted your hand, handing it over to Jungkook as you placed your hand over his and held it softly before stepping up to the plaque where the minister began.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the presence of God and these witnesses to join Jungkook and Y/N in holy matrimony. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud... Love never fails.” The officiant said as he gestured to everyone around them and to the young soon to be married couple in front of him.
"Jungkook, do you take Y/N to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in holy marriage? Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor her, and keep her in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, as long as you both shall live?” He asked, looking over at Jungkook.
Your eyes locked with him as he took a breath and nodded.
“I do.”
"Y/N , do you take Jungkook , to be your lawfully wedded husband , to live together in holy marriage? Do you promise to love him, comfort him, honor him, and keep him in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, as long as you both shall live?” He asked once again but this time, to you.
“I do” You said, your voice gentle and shy.
“I understand the two of your prepared vows.” He said, giving Jungkook the floor first.
“We did…but we dont want to say it out loud. We’d prefer to just exchange it to each other for now. ”
Weird, this was a request that the minister or anyone had never heard of. Jungkook and you decided a few weeks back that for your vows, you would exchange them in a form of a letter because that’s what felt right.
“I think that’s beautiful.” The officiant said, giving the two of you the floor, allowing you to turn around to Seul who passed you your neatly folded letter to Jungkook. While Jungkook took out the almost crumbled letter out of his tux pocked to hand to you.
Looking at the state of that letter, you laughed. It was the most boyish thing you’ve seen and it left weird butterflies in your stomach.
The guests laughed along, Jungkook's mother shaking her head as she wiped her tears.
“Can we get the rings?” The officiant asked, to which Jungkook's distant niece handed them the rings that sat on a soft pillow.
Jungkook picked up the ring that was yours and gently slid it on your finger before you had done the same. Proceeding to hold hands.
“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride!”
And there it was, your chest back in your throat. You didn't even know what to expect, so you swallowed the lump in your throat as you leaned in. Jungkook did the same.
Instead of your lips, he simply pressed a small kiss against your cheek.
Applause erupted throughout the venue as everyone rose to their feet. Smiles spread across familiar faces. Some wiped away tears. Others laughed quietly through them. They all knew the circumstances that had brought the two of you here. They knew this wasn't the love story either of you had imagined. Yet, as they watched you walk back down the aisle side by side...It somehow felt exactly like the beginning it was always meant to be.
a young man returns to a small town he hasn't seen in years, and a house he hasn't lived in since before the last president was born, only to find that a stray cat has given birth to kittens in his closet.
pairing: vampire!jeongguk x nerdy f veterinarian!reader (with a special interest in the science and biology aspect of the supernatural lol)
genre: sorta scifi-ish, fluff, minor angst, some smut later on
author's note: this is quite long.... i hope you like it!! <3
The moment you wake up, you're already fantasizing about Jeongguk's deep red blood in your fridge. With an appointment in the outskirts of town at 11 a.m., it leaves you… two hours, you conclude from the time displayed on your phone.
Rolling out of bed, you pick your white IKEA robe up from the floor where you dropped it last night, draping it over your silk nightgown and heading toward the bathroom to pee.
It hits you two minutes later, as you're standing in front of your open fridge, that you have vampire blood in there. The color-marked vials are staring back at you where they lie in all their glory, right next to a can of sugar-free Red Bull and the entirely empty bottle of ketchup you should've thrown out a month ago and that you evidently missed during your latest cleaning session.
Two of the three vials, you centrifuged at the clinic, meaning they're prepared for machine analysis but won't tell you much under the microscope. That's why you saved one, grabbing it—and the Red Bull—and putting them on the kitchen table, using your forearm to clear a space from the newly acquired library books.
You make a mental note to put the other two vials in the freezer since you don't know when you'll have a chance to analyze them at the clinic.
Vampire blood, how crazy. It's all you think about as you venture into your living room and pluck the microscope down from a shelf. Vampire blood. Who would've thought? When Jeongguk isn't near, it's easier to look at the situation objectively because are you entirely sure you met a vampire? You didn't just dream everything during a particularly rough fever?
But the blood staring at you from the kitchen table is different from what you usually deal with.
Preparing microscope slides is a process very familiar to you; something you could do with your eyes closed, but you don't think you've ever been as curious as you currently are, doing this one. The blood in the vial—already containing a bit of anticoagulant—is dark, and so is the drop you slowly transfer onto the thin glass slide with a plastic pipette.
Carefully, you place the coverslip on top, the smell of iron already wafting to your nose. It's not unpleasant, just… a lot stronger than what you're used to.
Leaning forward and putting your eyes to the ocular lenses, you switch the objective lens and adjust the position of the stage under it until the cells are sharp. You're not sure what you expected exactly, but you're not that surprised to see the massive amount of red blood cells; after all, they're what give the blood its red hue.
What you didn't expect was for them to be so much smaller than those of a human. You zoom in further, finding that they look a lot like ordinary red blood cells—almost like donuts—just smaller. Normally, having smaller red blood cells is a condition in itself and nothing good, but paired together with the astronomical amount of them?
There are surprisingly few goats in your town. When you do treat any, the most common reasons are difficult births, castrations, or urinary blockages, and therefore, it's been a long while since you got the chance to inspect caprine blood up close.
Taking a step back, you search for the phone you put somewhere as you prepared the microscope, finding it a little too close to the sink for your liking, before opening the browser and quickly typing 'goat erythrocytes'.
Just as you remembered: although rounder, the cells in the images that pop up are definitely smaller. There's also a shitload more of them, tightly packed like Jeongguk's. And as far as you can recall, those features are essentially what allow goats to live at higher altitudes, where the air is thinner and oxygen scarcer.
Since the exchange of oxygen happens at the membrane surface, and a bunch of smaller cells still have more surface area than fewer, larger ones, they're capable of transporting a lot more oxygen.
Satisfied with yet another plausible, logical explanation, you put the phone down and lean back in to the oculars, only to find that, despite the anticoagulant from the vial, Jeongguk's blood is already clotting.
Apparently, you lack one human emotion: shame. You know you possessed it as recently as a few days ago, but you must've lost it somewhere?
"Thank you so much."
"No problem, I'll email you the bill," you say, waving the relieved horse owner goodbye as you turn to the clinic car, vet bag firmly in hand.
A mere second after you've planted yourself into the driver's seat, you reach for the phone, pulling it out of your pocket. Your hands are dirty, fingers covered in that dark grime that comes from scratching a horse too long, but you barely notice as you inspect the screen for a reply to a text you sent an hour ago.
You: Hey, you wouldn't happen to be home, would you?
You don't even care if you just saw him yesterday. Or actually, you do care, cause it's embarrassing, but he also said to ask all the questions before he leaves town, so that's what you're doing.
You: Cause I'm driving by not far from you and I happen to have this jar I'd like you to spit in?
Yes, you're double-texting even.
But shame's claws reach and miss because just below your latest text, there's a reply.
Jeon Jeongguk: Stop by whenever. If I don't open then the door is unlocked.
Confusion grows as you start the car. Why wouldn't he simply open the door?
You try to think of a reason the entire ride there, none the wiser even as you step out of the car—hands cleaned by three antiseptic wipes—and walk up the stairs to the black-painted door.
However, five or so seconds after you knock, you hear footsteps approach on the other side, and then the door opens with a slight creak.
"Hey."
Jeongguk isn't wearing a shirt; only light blue jeans that you suspect he usually pairs with a belt because they're hanging a little too low on his hips, showcasing another white waistband stamped with the letters of Mr Klein.
Your wide eyes take him in, but his naked top half—bulging with muscle and skin even looking invitingly warm—isn't even what gathers most of your attention. No, that would be his black hair, messy and sticking out in multiple directions, and his half-closed, hooded eyes.
"Hi," you reply, your voice a tad too quiet as you admire him.
You'd try to hide it better, but it doesn't seem like he notices your slight—and almost dreamy—smile as he opens the door further and steps back. You follow, closing the door behind you and bend down to remove your shoes. While down there, you happen to notice that he's barefoot.
"Were you… sleeping?" you ask as you straighten up, seeing him look just a little more awake. Key word: a little.
He nods, turning to lead you somewhere. "Yeah, I tried to stay awake, but I ate just before you texted and that means I sleep after, like… almost involuntarily."
You follow, warmth spreading throughout your chest and not only because he's close by, his body heat radiating through your clothes.
"You sleep after eating?" you ask, endeared to hell and back. "You should've just told me you were busy today."
He stops in the kitchen, turning to you. You drop your bag on the floor.
"Yeah," he smiles lazily. "I can stay awake, but it's difficult."
"I can tell," you joke, tilting your head. God, why is he so endearing. "Do you think I could take your blood after you've eaten some time? See the difference and what makes you so sleepy?"
He nods. "Sure. Now?"
You pat your pockets, an act entirely uselessly since you don't keep your vet equipment there regardless.
"I don't have the right equipment with me, unfortunately. Maybe some other day?"
"Sure," he rubs his naked arm, yawning. "…Want me to bring blood to the clinic and drink it there?"
"I'd love that. Or…" You suddenly remember something. "When you say that you're hard to wake… Maybe it would be a bad idea to have you sleep at the clinic in case someone shows up again?"
His quick reflexes, speed, and agility were definitely the only reason Momo didn't find him at the clinic last time. You remember how heavy his limp arm was in your hands; what the hell would you even begin to do if someone came and Jeongguk wasn't waking up?
"Hm, you're right," he seemingly agrees, leaning against the counter, arms crossed lazily across his naked chest. "Come here then?"
"Sure," you agree, trying not to stare too blatantly at his chest or his arms. Or his abs and the faint little happy trail creeping up toward his belly button.
"Great. So… you wanted me to… spit in a cup?" he reminds you, and it looks like he's about to yawn again.
Suddenly reminded, you reach into your bag. "Yes, but also… I got a hold of one of these," you say, straightening up and holding the cup out to him. It's made out of a clear plastic with a soft, almost rubber-like lid up top.
"You want me to pee in it or what?" he asks, taking the cup from your hand and tilting it curiously in his.
"No," you snicker. "Although if you'd pee in a cup for me as well, I wouldn't turn it down. This is a special cup used for venomous snakes. Put their heads to the top, wiggle it a little, and they'll bite. Their fangs will sink through the lid here and the venom drips through and collects at the bottom."
He moves the cup to his mouth. "I just…?" he asks, demonstrating by sinking his teeth into the air above the cup.
"Yeah. Bite it and hold it there for as long as there's venom."
"Will you lend me your hand?"
Surprised—and with your heart skipping a quick beat—you blink but nonetheless offer him your left hand, electricity traveling through your skin when he takes it in his. He holds it so gently, feeling so warm against you, tired eyes finding some sort of focus as they lock onto yours, and he lowers his face to your wrist.
"I thought you… didn't need anything like this?" you ask quietly, heart jumping when he ghosts his nose over the sensitive skin of your wrist.
"Technically, I don't," he says, letting go of your hand and straightening up. You don't see any fangs. "Certain occasions make it easier, though. Like at the bar, when I was drunk, or now, when I'm already full and half asleep."
Nodding because his explanations are logical after all, you watch as he sinks his teeth—fangs—into the taut lid of the cup. Through the plastic, you see drops fall and liquid slowly pool at the bottom.
Then, you hear something. Something… small. You look down, seeing one of the kittens on its hind legs, clumsily reaching up toward you. "Oh, hello?"
It's so much bigger than when you last saw it and its siblings, and you crouch down, carefully picking the black little kitten up. It meows again, settling into your soft hold until it seemingly does a double take at Jeongguk, who stands motionless, watching, with his teeth still in the cup. The little kitten stares.
"What is dad doing, huh?" you coo quietly, smiling at the curious kitten.
Looking at the father in question, he lets out an amused breath before he removes his teeth from the cup, lifting it to inspect the results.
"Is this enough?"
You follow his gaze, watching the liquid at the bottom. It's much less than the blood you collected, and it's relatively translucent.
"Yeah, thank you so much," you say—way too excited—putting the kitten down and watching it dash away to pick a fight with an approaching sibling.
From your bag, you grab the other cup, a standard one meant for saliva, and you hold it out to Jeongguk, trading it for the collected venom.
"I just spit in this one?"
You nod, attention fully on the venom in the clear cup. It's just a tad thicker than water, fluidly following gravity as you tilt the small container.
"Do you happen to know the best way to store this?" you ask, peering over at Jeongguk, who's in the middle of letting his spit drip down into the other cup. "Because snake venom, for instance, is pretty sensitive and needs to be chilled rather quickly. But snakes are, you know, 'cold-blooded,' and you're like, insanely warm. I'm thinking I just go home and put it in the fridge? I'll definitely look at it tonight."
"I don't think it's that sensitive, but I know you can freeze it."
He hands you the other cup as well, and you pack them away safely in your bag.
"So… when are you free?" you ask, trying not to blush. "For the blood?"
Looking like he's soon succumbing to sleep whether he likes it or not, Jeongguk shrugs. "Tomorrow? If that works for you?"
You nod. "Sure. I'm busy later tomorrow, but sometime during the day? When do you typically… eat?"
"Noon?" he suggests.
You nod again, grabbing your bag. "I can do that."
"Yeah, but they just didn't care about it."
Nayeon tips her glass back and forth on the table, chin resting in her other hand. "That's insane. Child-free means child-free; why would they be exempt?"
"Yeah, but what did Dahyun do?" you chime in to ask. "I get that she's too nice, but she had a wedding organizer, didn't she? Couldn't that person throw them out?"
Just before a drunk dude—trying to squeeze past your table and the queue of people waiting to order at the bar—elbows her beer, Momo throws her hand out to catch it. She mutters something you don't quite hear over the music and loud voices before she gathers her thoughts.
"I asked the same, but she apparently threatened to cause a scene, so Dahyun just let her be. But the organizer… encouraged her to look after her kids so they wouldn't ruin anything else."
"Jeez," Nayeon shakes her head. "I just do not understand. Get a babysitter or don't go?"
You're about to agree when you hear someone call your name. It's a man's voice, but not the one you've come to prefer.
It's Joshua, approaching your table, his sight set on you while simultaneously scanning the area as if searching for his friends. Momo and Nayeon barely register what's happening before he's standing before you, leaning his palms on the table.
"Yo, what the fuck was up with that guy?" Joshua questions, looking confused and frustrated more than angry.
"What do you mean? What guy?" you ask, entirely comfortable with playing dumb.
"The guy you were with? Who lifted a car with one hand?"
You lean back in your seat, feeling your friends' confused gazes on your face and trying to channel something similar, your forehead creasing. "Lifted a car? That's not possible. I don't know what you're trying to do, but it's not fun, can we please just move on?"
Tight-lipped, he stares at you, and it brings you immense satisfaction to know that he and his friends must realize that somehow, you were right. You found something, but you're not sharing.
"Dude, what are you even on?" Momo questions. "Leave before we call security. Preferably the town."
Joshua looks between you, and then scans the heads around him that he can see. But luckily, his friends don't seem to be close by, and there's not much he can do but shake his head in frustration and walk away.
Keeping your eyes on him, you turn in your chair, and right before he disappears behind another group of people, he looks back over his shoulder. Without Momo and Nayeon seeing, you drop the confused and slightly hurt look on your face and give him a small smile.
Scientists, the whole bunch of you, you know Jeongguk would have them frothing at the mouth the same way he has you, but you. are. not. sharing. At least not with them; if it were up to you, you'd definitely consider letting your own friends in on the secret.
Meeting Momo and Nayeon's very puzzled looks, you do feel bad for essentially lying to them. But it isn't your secret to share, and you made a promise not to.
"I just don't understand what their problem is," Nayeon questions, clearly upset. God, you're a lucky girl, having friends like yours. "If they say one more thing, I think you should tell Joon because he'll give them a piece of his mind, and a man's scolding might—unfortunately—be what they need."
"Or Yoongi," Momo adds. "Yoongi, when angry, is not fun."
You think about the black haired man with unimpressed, cat-like features. "I've never… I don't think I've ever seen Yoongi mad."
"He doesn't raise his voice or anything, he just…" Momo grimaces. "You know the creepy guy with mals?"
You shake your head slowly. Belgian Malinois seem to be the go-to dog breed for creepy guys. Either that or toy poodles.
"The white, bald guy? I think he's on steroids. He threatened Sana like, years ago, and Yoongi made him leave the clinic, like, tail between his legs, with one sentence and a look."
"Rings a bell," you nod, thinking back to when you first started at the clinic. "I guess it's not that surprising, actually? Yoongi is… I can't even describe him, but he works by vibe? He can have the same no-expression on his face, and you know exactly what mood he's in regardless."
"Yeah. And he's sweet. You should tell him. Or Joon."
You lean back. "I don't know. If they approach me again, I'll think about it, but I don't feel like they're dangerous. Mostly annoying at this point."
"Still, they need to know it's not acceptable," Momo says, lifting the beer to her lips.
"Yeah," you breathe in agreement. "What time is it?"
"Eleven, just about," Nayeon answers, looking at her phone.
"I should get going." You slap your thighs like an old man having been out too late.
"You have the day off tomorrow, though, don't you?"
"Yeah, but I'm spent," you lie. There's one cup of spit and one of venom in your fridge, and they're both calling your name. God, aren't you a special kind.
Nayeon narrows her eyes. "Are you seeing someone we don't know about?"
Just about to stand, you freeze. "Uh, no? Why?"
"Cause Joshua mentioned a guy. And you have been a little absent lately."
Fuck.
"Okay, well…. It's not what you think, okay?" you start, deciding on a smaller white lie. "You know the guy with the stray kittens?"
Momo's eyes widen comically. "Uh… yeah?"
"I'm not seeing him as in seeing him, but I've been helping him with the kittens off-hours. He's not really an animal guy—well, he seems to like animals, he just lacks experience—and I don't really feel great charging him when he's doing a good deed, raising them."
"Oh, that's nice." Nayeon nods.
"But you like him too?" Momo asks, watching your cheeks start to burn.
Fine, seems like you have to admit defeat to your friends—just like you did your mother—at least a bit.
"You saw him," you point out, stirring the melting remains of ice in your glass with the straw. "How could I not?"
Momo chuckles. "That's why I'm wondering. Does he happen to have any friends in town?"
Before you can help it, your eyes widen. "Yeah, he does. Saw an entire friend group with him like… three weeks ago; they're all gorgeous."
"Well, let us know if you see them again," Nayeon encourages, smirking.
You laugh, partially at your friends and partially nervously at what you might've just signed up for. Jeongguk told you his friends were vampires too; would you set your friends onto vampires?
Sure, Jeongguk's nice, but you don't know his friends, and the last thing you want is direct your friends onto someone's dinner plate.
"I will."
"Alright. So, if you're really going home and not to cat guy's, let us know when you've gotten back, okay? If we don't hear from you in twenty, we're calling the cops."
You roll your eyes, but nod. Luckily, they didn't ask whether 'cat guy' actually lifted a car or not.
Walking home from the bar usually takes you around 12 minutes, the perks of living in a small town, but tonight, the…. eyes you think you feel on you as soon as you venture off the lively street have you covering the distance in 8.
Maybe it's paranoia? After all, you started feeling watched only after you conveniently found out there could be an assailant slowly but surely approaching your neighborhood. Despite trying to stay calm, the breath you let out when you're finally able to close and lock your apartment door behind you is long.
Recalling your promise, you send Nayeon a quick text, confirming your safety. She sends a heart back.
The blue numbers on your oven tell you it's nearing midnight when you finally sit down at your kitchen table, the microscope and the sample cups—fresh from the fridge—in front of you. The first drop you let fall on a slide is of Jeongguk's saliva. Clear, more viscous than water, it looks very much like something you could've spit into the container.
If you expected a groundbreaking, scientific discovery there in your kitchen, you'd be disappointed. Besides a lot… cleaner, Jeongguk's saliva looks like that of a human. And by cleaner, you mean that there's a lot less bacteria floating around. You're not entirely sure why, maybe analyzing the fluid would reveal some sort of additional antibacterial aspect?
God, the crimes you'd commit to have your own lab, capable of analyzing your collection of vampire bodily fluids.
Repeating the process but with a drop of Jeongguk's venom, you make extra sure to handle it with care. After all, you don't know a lot about it, and although Jeongguk claimed it wasn't dangerous in smaller quantities, maybe it stings like hell if you touch it and it enters a microscopic wound?
While you've never looked at pure venom under a microscope before, you've witnessed the cellular aftermath of envenomation as part of your education. You've seen cell shapes entirely mangled by one kind of venom, and you've seen blood turned to jelly by another. Death, essentially, following a snake bite.
To both the naked eye and those seeing through a magnified lens, Jeongguk's venom and saliva look quite similar. Even ordinary; not a lot happening within the clear fluids.
You stare at it, wondering…
Three seconds later, you're rising from the kitchen chair, eager steps taking you into the hallway where you rummage through the upper drawer of your small dresser. It's the designated knick knack spot, most of the contents more or less stolen from work; pens, clips, box cutters, and notes, but also things that sales representatives leave with you, hoping your clinic will become a distributor.
Digging through teeny tiny bags of cat treats—you don't even have a cat—you find a wrapped alcohol swab and the little glucose monitor kit you remember receiving last year.
Unzipping the small black bag, you grab the spring-loaded pricker and a lancet and leave the rest haphazardly in the drawer while you make your way back into the kitchen, already wiping your left index finger clean.
Realizing you should've removed the slide first, you do so with your finger clumsily held in the air, and then you're pricking your skin above the glass. To gather enough blood, you squeeze your fingertip, and with a big enough red bead on your skin, you turn your finger upside down, letting it drip.
Even before you put the coverslip back on top and lock the slide back under the lens, you watch the fluids mix, and your blood dilute. Because you're a creature of (human) habit, you put the pricked fingertip into your mouth as you lean forward to peer through the oculars. Only to stop breathing.
One by one, Jeongguk's venom drowns your red blood cells. You watch in real time as cell after cell warps, the venom aggressively mangling their cell membrane and starting to dissolve them. It's inevitable; they can't escape.
You watch the wave of death for close to a minute, and when only a few cells remain alive, fighting for their life, you lean back in your chair, and you stare at your ceiling.
Despite making another mind-blowing discovery right there in your kitchen only that morning, you can't shake that this feels… different.
Bag packed to the brim, you make the now very familiar drive out to Jeongguk's house in a better, more easy going mood than you were in the night before. It must've been the… alcohol remnants and the discomfort of walking home alone. Right?
You're smiling excitedly even before the door to the large house opens, even more so when your vampire appears, ushering you through the small gap 'before the kids escape.' While he doesn't touch you, he's certainly not scared of being close, and before you know it, you're standing there in the small hallway again.
"Hey, Mina," you greet one of the 'kids' toeing around your feet. "And… Lilith, was it?" you nod toward the mother cat that appears from God knows where, stroking herself against Jeongguk's leg. He's wearing light wash jeans similar to those he wore yesterday, but this time, he's also—unfortunately—wearing a dark green t-shirt.
"Wait," you pause, wide eyes watching him. "You did not."
Jeongguk lifts his eyes to meet yours, a knowing grin pulling on his lips.
"'Lilith' as in the mother vampire? 'Mina' as in Dracula's wife, and 'Ruby' for blood red, I assume? Don't tell me 'Angel' is after the vampire in Buffy?"
He chuckles, bending down to pick up the little kitten, who's definitely not as little anymore. She meows and closes her eyes almost instantly, cozying up on Jeongguk's arm and against his chest.
"What about… 'Nyx,' was it?"
"'Nyx' is the Goddess of the night," he informs, reaching his unoccupied hand out to take your bag the moment you set it down to take your shoes off.
"Went right over my head."
You think back to that night, when he stood beside you, holding onto that chilly metal railing outside the bar and telling you the kittens' names.
"I know you probably didn't plan on showing me like that, but were you planning to? At all?"
With your shoes neatly to the side, you straighten up and take a step toward him, intending on following him into the house. But he doesn't move, just watches you with your bag in one hand and the satisfied kitten on his other arm.
"I wanted to, but I'm not entirely sure I would've, had I not done it then. I definitely wasn't supposed to, so… naming them like that made me feel like I was at least giving you a little hint. Maybe even testing the waters a bit."
He tilts his head slightly, looking down at you before he seemingly remembers what you were supposed to do. "Anyway…"
Sight set on the kitchen, he leads. You follow, looking around even though nothing's changed since last time.
"So, about the house… Was it really passed down?"
"No," he shakes his head, putting the black kitten down on the kitchen counter and turning to you. "I bought it in… uh, sometime during the first half of the 19th century, I think. Tried to keep up with all the trends for my estates but gave up after a while. If I actually live somewhere, I'll have it up to standard, but like this, when I'm just visiting?"
"It was furnished like this already?"
"Yeah. I had the running water and electricity installed later on. Was quite the pain in the ass to be honest."
"It's a cool house, though," you compliment, once again peering around the light kitchen. "A bit like a museum. Can't believe you're so old, honestly, like you lived when this was trendy?"
Jeongguk inhales sharply, blinking dramatically in an offense you know he doesn't feel. It makes you laugh.
"Anyway," he repeats his earlier segue, putting your bag down on the floor and reaching for the fridge handle. You watch as he grabs a jug of already mixed blood, putting it on the counter with a soft thud.
"You only wanted blood from after I've eaten, right? Not before?"
Nodding, you can't believe the situation you're in. "Yeah. Thank you."
For a short while, silence settles. It's far from uncomfortable, and you're very busy, watching Jeongguk prepare the blood. First, he pours a big glass of it, plucking a spoon from a drawer to stir it. Of course, your gaze is torn between the way his big, veiny hands hold onto that fragile-looking glass and how his muscles dance discreetly under his skin as he stirs.
Putting the spoon down on the counter, he places the glass in the microwave, presses start, and then turns to you.
"Can I ask why you're visiting?" you take the opportunity to ask as the microwave hums lowly and the glass rotates inside it.
"You can ask," he smirks, leaning back against the counter. "But I can only tell you that it's for work."
"Work?" Eyebrows knitted together, you stare at him. "Like… vampire work?"
"Yeah."
But what kind of work would be deemed 'vampire work?'
"You don't like… work for the Volturi, right?"
"The what? Volturi?"
"Yeah, the vampire…. governing body—I guess—in Twilight. They keep the vampire citizens in check; make sure they don't hunt humans to extinction or expose themselves to them. Or, like, turn babies into vampires."
"Oh. No, not really."
"Good, 'cause you would've probably have broken a lot more rules than you actually did for telling me. And I would be in more shit for knowing."
…Which reminds you…
"Also, uhm…"
Jeongguk raises a dark eyebrow, curious as to what's suddenly gotten you apologetic.
"My classmates… They might approach you if they see you. Just to let you know. Sorry."
"They've been giving you any trouble after what I did?" he asks, voice turning serious.
You sigh. "No, not really. One approached me and asked about you, but he was more… frustrated and shocked than angry, I think. But I mean, what you did is not something a human just does."
A smile pulls on Jeongguk's lips. "I know. That was the point."
The microwave beeps behind him, indicating that his blood has reached his preferred temperature. The body temperature of a human. He turns, opening the door and taking the glass out.
At least relieved that he doesn't seem bothered, you let your shoulders relax a little. "Yeah, I know. I'm just warning you."
"I appreciate it," he says, retrieving the spoon from the counter to stir the red liquid again. "You don't need to worry about me, though."
Eyes again appreciating his hands and arms as he stirs, you can't let go quite yet. "I mean clearly you'd be able to defend yourself if they for some reason wanted to fight, but I'm mostly thinking whether them knowing and stirring up shit does cause you trouble."
"They didn't strike me as people who would tell. And who would believe them?"
"True." After all, you said the same thing.
"And if it comes to it, I can be pretty persuasive."
The tiny smirk he shoots your way has your skin heating, but yet another thought growing.
"You haven't seen The Vampire Diaries, either, have you?"
"No. Is that another movie?"
"A series."
He looks between you and the glass he holds up. "So, I drink this now? Just so you know, I'll get progressively sleepier in a few minutes."
You nod, the Vampire Diaries connection forgotten as a different memory resurfaces and a subsequent realization hits. "Wait, so… were you like dead asleep right after I left when I asked you to drink blood that first time?"
He smiles, putting the glass to his mouth for a first sip. "Yeah. It was pretty fitting that you left, actually. I can stay awake, but it's hard."
You don't quite notice how your smile grows until he asks you about it, wiping his mouth. "What's so funny?"
Watching him gulp down more of the contents, your eyes struggle to stray from his Adam's apple and how it moves with every swallow. "Not funny. I just find that… insanely adorable? What do you mean you eat and then you actually struggle to stay awake? How is that a good evolutionary trait when we don't have to?"
'We' as in 'you.'
Humans.
"Don't make me regret telling you about it," he says, giving you a warning eye and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand again. "Biologically, if I had… hunted for this," he lifts the mostly empty glass, coated in red, "then I wouldn't feel tired until the adrenaline wears off. Since I microwaved this, and I'm chilling in my own house, it hits sooner."
"Sorry. That's kinda cool actually."
He gives you a sweet look that tells you you're forgiven, and then he puts the empty glass down on the counter. "We can sit on the bed."
When he points to the bag you placed on the floor earlier, eyebrows raised in a silent question, you nod. "Yeah, I'll need that."
Before even giving you the chance to, he grabs the handles of your blue backpack, already heading toward the hall and the stairs. You follow closely behind, seeing two kittens play at the bottom of the stairs.
"You're so modern," you comment as you climb the stairs behind him. "Like, I would imagine it's hard to keep up with the ever-changing trends, and so I wouldn't blame you for not even trying? But you speak so normally, and you dress like that?"
"Like what?" you hear him chuckle.
"Like every other modern guy. Not that you're basic or anything, just that nothing about you screams ancient."
You hear the amusement in his voice as he turns to you at the top of the stairs. "I'll take that as a compliment."
"You should," you say, looking up at him as you come to stand before him. It's true, what you said, and while natural, non-altered facial structures don't change much with society, you could never tell by his face either. In a way, he's got a very classic beauty to him. At least according to you, but you don't say that, of course.
"Thank you, then. It's definitely something you learn; going with the flow of society. But it's also harder these days when trends evolve and cycle much faster than before. You used to get 20 years to adapt to big societal changes and now you barely get five. Some trends are dead and buried within six months."
You haven't been in his bedroom since it was covered in a thick layer of dust. Like the rest of the house, it's clean now. He doesn't seem to have a lot of stuff, but the bed is made with white fluffy sheets, a thick, golden bedspread over them and a big, black towel folded at the foot of it.
"Make yourself comfortable," he says, gesturing toward the bed as he puts the backpack down on the floor. "When do you want to take the blood?" he asks, grabbing the towel and unfolding it to drape over the bed.
Noticing your silence, he peers back at you.
"Uh… preferably in an hour and then an hour after that…"
"But…?" he asks, sensing your slight hesitancy.
"But there's something I'd like to do in the meantime."
You can't help it, the slightly sheepish smile that pulls on your lips. Or the heat you feel rise but desperately hope he can't see.
"You look like it's something you're afraid I won't like?"
"I don't know. I mean, I hope you'll be okay with it, and after last time, I think so?"
"Well, what is it?"
His dark eyes are curious and entertained like always, and you most definitely suspect he knows what's going on in your head.
"So when you lifted the car… using one hand, might I add, it made me curious about your back. A human would've probably herniated at least three discs and snapped their spine if they were able to even lift it like that. I figure that everything's probably just… stronger like the anatomy of your arm…"
"…But you'd like to see?"
Essentially asking to feel him up again, you bite your lip and nod once. "Yeah."
Instead of teasing you about it, Jeongguk unceremoniously grabs the shirt at the back of his neck and yanks it over his head, tossing it onto the foot of the bed. Taking the action as consent, you crouch in front of your backpack, excitedly rummaging through it for two things. Well, four things: your small notebook and a pen that you clip to the collar of your t-shirt included.
Sitting down on the edge of his bed—on its right side—Jeongguk looks back at you, his gaze falling to the thick books in your hands.
"Went to the library," you explain, placing them on the bed, next to his discarded shirt.
He cranes his neck to read the titles. One is just a huge book on human anatomy, and the other is slightly thinner and focused on sports medicine.
"Thought you knew everything?"
"I'm a veterinarian. I'd say I know a lot about humans, but far from everything."
A silence settles as you climb onto the bed, positioning yourself behind him and the books at your side for easy access. Jeongguk keeps his head sideways, calmly and quietly watching you open the thicker book on the right chapter, inspecting the sketched human back and its muscles.
Lifting your own gaze from the pages, you take in the sight of his broad, naked back in front of you.
"Okay, so I can…?" you ask, hand hovering over his skin.
He nods, turning his head forward and rolling his shoulders once. Slightly wide-eyed, you stare at the casual display of his muscles. God damn.
Shaking any non-scientific thought out of your head, you begin.
The first thing you do is let your fingers trace his spine as you search for the landmarks. Despite having a very, very low body fat percentage, Jeongguk's vertebrae are less prominent than you'd expected. You can still feel them, however, and soon enough, you have your fingertips on C7, the more prominent vertebra located at the bottom of the neck.
"I can barely feel your spine," you mumble, mostly to yourself.
Is there something other than fat almost… covering them? Can't be anything besides the connective ligaments, you think to yourself. In that case, they're a lot thicker and stronger than in a human. Unless it's muscle that's covering them? Or… maybe his vertebrae have a different design? Maybe they're smoother? Forehead creasing, you consider the shapes possible for vertebrae still able to connect and allow the spine to bend.
You grab the pen from your neckline, keeping your left hand on Jeongguk's back while your right scribble some quick notes in your notebook.
'Vertebrae non-prominent, covered by? muscle/ligaments? different structures?'
Moving on, you leave the pen on the notebook and instead put your right index finger on the drawing. Your left one copies the movement of your right as you trail it down toward the middle of Jeongguk's back.
Latissimus Dorsi. It's one of the muscles at risk of damage from a too-heavy one-handed lift like what you saw Jeongguk perform. Of course, you don't know whether the action impacted him at all; maybe he sustained micro tears? Doesn't make the feat any less impressive.
Using both hands, you trace the muscle where it connects to the spine, all the way from his mid back to the lower part of it.
"Do you usually lift heavy like that?"
As if he wasn't paying that much attention—or just not expecting to be spoken to—he takes a second or two to find his voice. And when he does, you feel your heart squeeze almost pathetically at how he already sounds a little sleepy.
"Yeah. I don't really need to work out to keep my muscles all that much, I just do stuff because it's fun."
"Oh? if my memory serves me right, a human needs to work out a muscle at least within two weeks or it'll start to atrophy to save energy. Muscles are really metabolically expensive to keep."
He straightens up a little. "I could go longer than that, I think. I usually do kinda workout more often than that though."
"Interesting," you remove your hands altogether to note down his words. "And does lifting heavy come with any kind of pain? Soreness?"
"Only if I strain myself, but that happens very rarely. Not when I lifted the car for example."
You nod, more so to yourself. "Okay. So you probably do get micro tears. How long does the soreness typically last?"
"A few hours at most."
"Really? A human will usually be sore for days."
"Yeah. Losers."
A bubbling laughter escapes you, but afterward, another bout of silence settles.
Jeongguk's breaths are slow and deep, and you feel every one of them under your hands as you move them over his back. He yawns.
"Do you need me… conscious?" he asks, repeating the same words from the clinic and glancing at you from over his shoulder. His barely-open eyes and sleepy words pull on your heartstrings. Not only because he's endearing and adorable, but because he's seemingly so comfortable with you. As established, you for sure don't pose a threat to him, but still…
"I mean, I don't mind, but… I guess if you're okay with it…?"
You move when he does, scooting back to give him enough space as he sighs deeply and lies down on his stomach. He's already closing his eyes.
"Go to town," he mumbles.
"You really trust me that much?" you ask, putting your hand on his lower back, feeling the thoracolumbar fascia that connects the latissimus dorsi to the spine. "What if I hurt you?"
"It's pretty hard to hurt me, and I never got the impression that you'd try."
That's definitely true, and you're glad he feels that. While the biggest risk of trusting you has never been bodily harm but exploitation for your scientific research—maybe even fame—you've never had any interest in that.
"I could be a vampire hunter, waiting for the chance to stake you?"
Without even opening his eyes, Jeongguk chuckles. "What a way to go, then. First massaged by a pretty woman and then staked in my sleep. Couldn't complain."
Head and heart soaring in the clouds—and cheeks warm—you can't do anything but flick his skin. He laughs, but it's even more sleepy now.
"Insane," you mumble, reaching for the books again. While you adjust, sitting cross-legged with the anatomy book open in your lap—this time your left hand on the sketch and your right on Jeongguk's skin—he falls asleep.
Once again, you have a gorgeous, huge, superhuman man unconscious under your hands, and you'd be a fool not to take advantage of the situation. Not that you're doing anything he'd object to if awake but feeling his body is easier when you don't have to worry about any kind of tension growing.
Fingers softly tracing the skin and then pressing just a tad harder, feeling the structures underneath, you note that… there's not a lot to note. Besides the vertebrae not being as easily felt, the rest of him feels as expected. His muscles are thick and well-developed, and the ligaments feel stronger and sturdier, just like the ones you managed to ultrasound in his arm. So no surprise there.
It's been roughly ten minutes since you think Jeongguk fell asleep when you feel something. You've got your right hand on his upper back, curiously inspecting his scapula and the trapezius muscle that stretches up toward his neck when there's… a grumbling? It has you pausing, wondering if maybe he said something. But a quick glance at his face confirms that he's still asleep, cheek resting heavily against a pillow.
He must've mumbled in his sleep or something, which… cute.
You resume, hand sliding down his spine and to his side, when you feel it again. But this time, it's not a quick ordeal; it's… longer. The sound is low, starting deep in his chest and reverberating up and through your hand. It's almost soundless, just a low, low sound in the otherwise silent room.
Your heart does what you can only describe as a backflip because it reminds you an awful lot of… purring.
It's been almost an hour when the purring stops. You have your hand on his lower side, toward the back, flipping pages with the other.
"Find anything fun?" a low, raspy voice asks you.
You look up to see that Jeongguk is watching you, his eyes warm but sleepy.
"Uhm, yeah," you state, abandoning the current page search and returning to another. "This," you say, moving your right hand to his upper side, where you run it back and forth, "seems to be an…"
You lift the book to read the small insert aloud. "'Axillary arch.' Which is a muscle… variation. Sometimes considered vestigial. Humans can still have it, but it seems like only around five percent of people do. And not only do you have it, but it seems to be super well developed. Turn over, please?"
No questions asked, Jeongguk rolls over slowly, looking up at you where he now lies on his back. With your eyes buried in the book, you reach for his arm that's closest to you, making it clear you want him to lift it. He does, obediently placing his hand above his head, waiting for whatever you're going to do.
"Okay, so it's a variation of the latissimus dorsi, which is this muscle on your back that reaches up here, " you explain, tracing his side. "But the axillary arch is when it branches off over here, connecting to the pectorals."
You look at your hand as it glides over his warm, taut skin, close to his armpit, feeling for the attachments. "It says here that many think it's useless, but that some suggest that it brings strength but also a more advanced shoulder proprioception."
"And what would that mean?"
"Well, if it does what they suggest, it essentially gives you almost a sixth sense when it comes to body control. Helps your body know how to move appropriately, at least your upper body and arms, and just how much force to use. My guess would be that it's actually very useful when you're so much stronger."
"Hm."
You continue. "Considering a low percentage of humans have it too, it could be another 'you' thing more than a vampire thing, though. I assume you don't know whether others like you have it too?"
"No."
"Alright," you smile at him. "It's very cool, though. Can't believe I missed it."
"When did you miss it?"
"Last time at the clinic? I was feeling your lymph nodes in your armpit."
"Oh yeah." He grins widely
You narrow your eyes as it hits you. The sound you heard when you felt for the nodes… was him letting out a little breath of laughter? "You were awake, weren't you?"
"Yeah."
You just shake your head, putting the book down. "Anyway, would it be alright to draw some blood?"
"Sure."
You get off the bed, digging through the bag for the supplies before you get back on the covers.
"Sit up, please?"
He does, leaning back against the wooden headboard and holding that veiny arm out for you. You position it how you want it, not thinking too much about how you inevitably place his warm hand to rest on your upper thigh, palm up. Drawing blood while sitting on a bed is understandably a first for you.
"You know you don't really have to do that. Or use gloves," he mentions when you wipe his skin with an antiseptic wipe.
You pause, thinking it through before deciding. "Don't wanna take any risks," you mumble.
Focused, you use the same kind of needle as last time, pushing it into his vein. It goes smoother this time around since you already know how much pressure to use. The whole process is smoother, relatively quick, and… silent.
Every glance at Jeongguk's face as he watches your hands tells you that he's dozing off again. It's such an endearing yet… surprising sight; the big, buff, half-naked vampire sitting up and his eyes getting heavier by the second. You don't tease him for it, honestly still flattered that he lets you see him like this.
"Okay, I'm done," you speak quietly. "Do you want me to leave it in or take it out and re-stick later?"
He opens his eyes half way, glancing tiredly at you. "It's up to you. I don't mind either way."
"Okay, hold on," you say, putting some gauze against his skin as you pull the needle out. Of course, it's more out of habit than need because the puncture wound doesn't bleed; it's barely a wound at all. "You can lie down."
He doesn't answer, just shifts to lie back down. Tired, he blinks heavily, and you can basically see him slowly fall asleep again.
With the anatomy book open on the muscles on the front of the human body, you trace his slow-moving chest lightly. To your delight, the… purring starts again.
Your touch is soft as usual when you trace his collarbones, making mental notes of the thickness and hardness of them, his sternum and the dip between his pectoral muscles, and the visible parts of his obliques and where they attach to his ribcage. His chest moves slowly and rhythmically under your hand, and his skin is invitingly warm. You'd write down your discoveries, but there aren't really any more.
Ten minutes later, you have indeed somewhat securely ruled out any big differences. You've even counted his ribs, and somewhere, between the slow, deep breaths of the vampire next to you, and the fact that you didn't sleep that well last night, the sleep bug bites you to.
Your tired eyes glance around the room. It's quiet and calm, and Jeongguk's bed is very spacious.
Would he mind? You don't think so.
Slowly and carefully, you lie down, leaving a good amount of space between you. The low sound coming from him—the purring—is so incredibly relaxing, even if you're too far away to feel it.
Unfortunately, you wake up to movement. Movement moving you.
Big, warm, strong arms are dragging you across the bed by your waist and torso, pulling your back flush against him. Despite waking up only half a second ago, your eyes are already open and they widen further when you feel Jeongguk's mouth in your hair. He draws a big breath, alarm bells sounding in your head as you're reminded of how he used your smell to trigger his fangs.
By pure instinct, you try to wiggle out of his grasp, but your arms are stuck, held tightly against your body, and panic starts to rise when you can't move.
He has to let you go; you can't overpower him.
Your heart beats so hard it hurts when he pulls you even closer, his mouth lowering, as if searching for something. You can barely move a muscle in his hold.
"Jeongguk?" you call desperately.
And just like that, he relaxes. Quick to sit up and carefully move toward the other end of the bed, you watch him. Eyes closed, lying on his side and breathing slowly and calmly, he's still asleep. God, you nearly shit yourself. Are you worried for your safety around him? Not necessarily, but him seemingly grabbing you in his sleep?
Smelling you and perhaps even searching for your neck?
A shiver racks your body.
Jeongguk continues to sleep soundly and unfazed for another twenty minutes, all while your racing heart slowly quiets down to normal again. Flipping through the books in your lap, you find yourself grateful that he didn't wake up because… he still let you go and maybe it would've also made it awkward? Whatever you and Jeongguk are, cuddle buddies aren't quite it.
Another reason for your gratitude is the vision the current situation grants you. Not that of Jeongguk asleep and shirtless—well, that too—but 15 minutes before he wakes up for the second time, someone enters the room. You don't hear the little paws; you only notice when the little kitten has climbed the bed and is in the process of climbing Jeongguk.
You can't tear your eyes away. You think it's… Nyx? who appears on his back, sight set on the little curve at the back of Jeongguk's neck. The kittens must be around five weeks old at this point, meaning they get around pretty efficiently but have yet to acquire the feline elegance someone like their mom possesses.
Jeongguk doesn't stir the slightest as the kitten gives off a tiny meow and curls up at the back of his neck, even tucking its paws in under itself.
And to make it worse, she's not the only one. Within a span of minutes, two more come padding, one using its claws to climb up Jeongguk's jeans, settling comfortably in the curve of his lower back. The other—Mina—finds her way to his front, squeezing in under his thick arm and curling up in the small space between his bicep and his chin.
Whatever you've claimed before, this is the cutest thing you've ever seen in your entire life. If you listen closely, you can hear at least two of the kittens purring.
Smiling to yourself, you turn the page to read about meniscus tears.
You're halfway through the section when movement catches your attention, and you lift your gaze from the text. Jeongguk is waking up, slowly opening his eyes and shifting.
"They're very comfortable with you, dad," you muse.
Jeongguk gives you a sleepy grin.
"Cats also like warm things," you continue.
"Yeah, I've noticed," he says, repeating what he told you the first time you informed him of the feline trait. You wonder if he was already referring to the kittens and their mother's desire to cuddle him? "If I don't have the fire going, they always come and find me," he says, taking a deep breath.
You can't do anything but observe, almost inclined to ask whether you can take a picture. "This is for sure the cutest thing I've ever seen."
Jeongguk lets out a lazy chuckle before reminding you of something. "Did you want more blood?"
"Oh. Yeah, if you're willing to give it?" You glance at your watch. "I'll need to leave soon."
He glances at you curiously. "Late shift at the clinic?"
"No," you shake your head. "Or, well, it depends. The Bar is having a Halloween night, and I promised Nayeon and Momo I'd come. But I'm also on call tonight, and this time of year, we see a lot of horses colicking and canine poisonings."
"Huh? Why is that?"
"Rapid temperature drops often make horses drink a lot less water, leading to blockages, essentially. And Halloween means candy everywhere and a larger risk of dogs getting into it."
"Ah. Sucks. I heard about the Halloween event. Tae wanted to go."
"Dress up and everything?" you question, wide-eyed.
You enjoy social get-togethers just as much as the next person, and you for sure like everything Halloween; it's just the overhanging anxiety regarding the mix of you, halloween themes, and the public.
"Yeah? Just because we're old doesn't mean we're boring. I can be a party guy if I want to."
"So you're going? Dressed as what?"
"You'll have to wait and see. What are you going as?"
"You think I'll tell you if you're not telling me?"
"I guess not. Do I have to sit up? For the blood?"
"Preferably, unfortunately," you smile sadly, looking at the kittens, all so comfortable.
Incredibly endeared, you watch Jeongguk reach behind him, gently grasping the black kitten sleeping deeply and satisfied on his warm skin. She wakes up, letting out a sad meow as she's being airlifted off Jeongguk by his large hand.
"Of course it was you," he mumbles when the kitten comes into view. "This one would crawl inside my skin if she could."
He puts her down on the bedspread, and she immediately bolts back to him, entirely intending on reclaiming her spot or at least one against his skin. Not like you can blame her. The other two—one under his arm and the other still on his lower back—move on their own when their heater slowly starts to sit up.
It's mostly that first one, stubbornly wanting to warm herself against him.
"No," he scolds gently, moving her away so that he can sit up without her accidentally getting in the way.
The moment he's upright and seated against the headboard, however, she uses her claws to climb up his jeans. He doesn't intervene until she's climbed her way up to the waistband of his pants and the visible band of his underwear, obviously having her sight set on warmth.
"No, you can't go in there," he chuckles, lifting her off a second before she digs her way in between his jeans and underwear.
"Do they sleep in here too?" you wonder, watching the little kitten fight for her rights.
"Yeah, most of the time. I prefer to sleep in a slightly… cooler environment, but if I don't have the fire burning, then they find me. I tried closing the door once—for their safety because what if I crush them in my sleep?—but that was a mistake because Lilith was just screaming at me to open the door."
You don't bring up that he almost accidentally murdered you in his sleep only half an hour ago. Okay, that's an over exaggeration but who knows what could've happened?
Still, it wasn't intentional, and he's clearly concerned about accidentally hurting others. Well, his kittens, but you feel like you belong in that category too; someone pathetically weak compared to him, easily injured, and who gravitates toward him. You definitely also like warm things.
Retrieving the equipment needed for yet another blood draw, you move closer to him. This time, you don't use gloves, but as he offers you his arm, you still clean his skin and your hands with antibacterial wipes.
"This doesn't hurt you?" you ask as you push the needle through his skin, out of the corner of your eye seeing him pet the kitten, who's settled on his thigh.
"No. I mean, I can feel it, and it's not nice, but it doesn't really hurt."
"That's good, makes me feel better for poking you so much."
"It's fine," he smiles, eyes on the little kitten as another approaches. "Have you… looked at it? Under microscope or whatever it was that you wanted to do?"
Fastening the needle with some tape, you reach for the first out of three vials.
"Yeah. Do you want to know what I found? Unless you already know the differences?"
"I think that we have smaller… cells? And more iron? At least that's what I remember."
"Yeah," you confirm, watching the blood start to fill the vial. It's just as dark as the samples sitting in your freezer. "Your red blood cells are smaller than mine, and so there's room for a lot more, even considering they're already packed, hence the darker color. Combined, they have a bigger surface area and can bind more oxygen, which I'm sure contributes to your strength. Your muscles get more blood due to the size of your veins, and your blood carrying loads more oxygen than a human man's would."
"Interesting."
"Yeah. Funny enough, goats have a similar… set up."
Amused, Jeongguk raises his eyebrows. "Goats?"
"Yeah. They're built to thrive at higher altitudes where oxygen is scarcer and one needs to be oxygen-efficient."
"That's cool."
"Yeah, I think so to. I haven't been able to analyze it at the lab yet, though." Removing the full vial, you attach the second. "And your saliva looks very similar to a human's, only less… bacterial. So I'm guessing there's something antibacterial in there that kills off bacteria. Which could make sense from an evolutionary standpoint if you're supposed to drink from the same human on different occasions. A dirty mouth would lead to more infections and human deaths."
"I think I heard something about that too, actually."
You blink, pretending to be offended. "You know these things but don't tell me?"
He smirks lazily. "I mean, what fun is that? Besides, I mostly remember them because you're bringing them up. I learned whatever I know so long ago, and it's knowledge I don't really need in my day-to-day life."
"I guess you're forgiven."
He chuckles. "You can't say you don't prefer getting to see and discover for yourself?"
You think about it, and sure, maybe you do. "Fine. But what if I miss things? I can't possibly go over every single part of your biology in a few weeks."
"You can try? And what about my venom?"
"You're stressing me out, Jeongguk," you admit, anxiety rising at the thought of having to explore without any help at all. "And your venom just looks a lot like your saliva, but seemingly behaves pretty similarly to some types of snake venom. I did—"
A loud meow interrupts you as the two exploring kittens seemingly get into a fight. They scream and hiss at each other in a way that's surprising for such young kittens. But before you know it, it's over.
"You're calm," Jeongguk pets the kitten on his lap. "You're a good girl."
"How do you know it's a she?" you nod toward the kitten without respect for personal boundaries.
"I can smell the difference."
"You can?"
He hums.
Seeing that also the last vial is approaching fullness, you prepare to remove it. "Since the start?"
"Yeah."
"So your names weren't based on vibes at all?"
He grins, watching you once again detach the vial and use a wad of gauze to pull the needle out. No blood this time around either.
"No. Or I mean, yeah; vampire vibes."
You roll your eyes, curiosity still spiking.
"I haven't asked that much about your senses besides your vision… But your sense of smell is good then, I take it?"
"Yeah."
"Like that of a dog? Do I need to take an extra shower before meeting you? An additional layer of deodorant?"
He laughs quietly. "I don't know if it's as advanced as a dog's. Maybe slightly less? But you don't need to worry; you always smell really nice."
Well, you definitely hope he's not lying—and he didn't seem to mind smelling you in his sleep—but also, you'll definitely make sure to always be extra clean when meeting him.
"You're much more polite than I imagined a vampire to be. I'm done now, thank you," you say, grabbing the vials and the discarded material having gathered on the bedspread.
"It's true though. You smell really pleasant. Very womanly."
You raise your eyebrows as you stand from the bed, packing everything away inside your backpack. "I guess I'll take that as a compliment?"
"You should because it is."
In the middle of feeling your cheeks heat just a tad, you're suddenly reminded of something. You straighten up, watching him where he remains sitting on his bed, stroking the kitten's back as the two others explore the bed.
"I know that I have… maybe a below average sense of smell for a human—possibly an advantage with my job—but you don't… smell much to me."
If you weren't so panicked when he grabbed you, you for sure would've jumped at the opportunity to see what he smells like.
"Can you smell another human? If they're not wearing perfume or have been out, sweating for hours?"
"…No."
"Right. Humans generally aren't able to. Up close, skin to skin, sure but not really from a distance. Vampires communicate more by scent than humans do."
"So you don't wear perfumes?"
"No. I don't like perfumes. Mildly scented soaps and stuff are alright, but not perfumes. A few vampires wear them, but they're the bane of my existence. For example, I would rather you show up here smelling of organic cow shit than… Victoria's Secret."
You chuckle. "Good to know."
<previous | next>
author's note: i considered splitting this because it's so long but i didn't! but i'd be super grateful if you left a reblog and comment/ask if you liked it! <3<3 (also i'm very curious if anyone picked up on the names cause no one's commented on them at least 🤣)
“Jungkook wants to get matching couple piercings, while Taehyung does not like the idea. This is a story of how they navigate the situation without hurting the other.”
Pairing: Jungkook x Taehyung
Genre: vampires!AU, established relationship!AU, Slice of Life, Fluff
Warnings: the mention of dick piercings, innocent nudity, kisses
Wordcount: 1.1k | Minors DNI you will be blocked & reported
a/n: yall imagine taekook with dick piercings though 😶
“What if we got matching piercings?”
Taehyung lowers his phone, glancing over at Jungkook sprawled out on the sheets. He was busy editing the pictures he and Jungkook took today on their date, but he cannot concentrate on them right now after Jungkook’s question.
“Excuse me?” he asks.
“I was thinking.” Jungkook flops to his back, fingers playing with his own lips mindlessly. It is innocent of nature, just a simple stim thing. “You know how we basically heal instantly because of our powers?”
“Yes.”
“What if we pierced each other? It would heal instantly and if it’s not to our taste and we took it out, it would heal up right away.”
“You want to pierce each other?”
“Yeah, maybe we could pierce our lips or get matching nose rings. Maybe eyebrows? Or what if we’re completely unhinged and got our dicks pierced?”
Taehyung flusters at the suggestion.
“Have you ever even used piercing tools?”
“Sure. Who do you think did all my piercings?” Jungkook states and plays with his heavily pierced ears.
Taehyung follows his fingers with his eyes. He likes Jungkook’s piercings, they fit him so well, but he does not know if he is ready to take the same step.
“What exactly made you think up such ideas?” he asks.
“I don’t know. Myself I guess.” Jungkook looks at Taehyung. “You hate it, don’t you?”
“If I can be honest with you, this is something I have never considered doing. I am quite happy with the piercings I currently possess”, he says and points at his pierced earlobes.
“Alright, then we won’t do it.”
Jungkook settles on his side, back facing Taehyung.
“Are you mad at me now?” Taehyung asks sadly.
“Huh? No, of course not.”
“Then why are you facing away from me?”
Jungkook rolls over.
“It’s a full moon. My shoulder hurts tonight. You know, where it got ripped out as a human.”
Taehyung clicks his tongue.
“Why did you not say something? I have something to help you.”
Taehyung gets out of bed and hurries to his dresser. He asked you to make a potion that eases magic related pain. When a vampire looses a limp as a human and then gets reborn as a vampire, said limp grows back but it will never gain its vampiric strength. The separation line is visualised by a thick silver scar. It spans around all of Jungkook’s arm, as if he was wearing a permanent shoulder bracelet.
Taehyung returns to the bed with the magical oil.
“Where does it hurt?”
“Just all around.”
“Sit up. I will massage you.”
Jungkook never really had someone who would massage his scar when it hurts before he had Taehyung. Whenever his shoulder hurt in the past, he would simply brave through it. Jungkook remembers the first attack he had in front of Taehyung, how he explained to him what happened and how Taehyung showed up with the magical oil the next day. And Jungkook gained someone who would massage his scar when it hurts. He never really told him how grateful he is for what he does for him.
Taehyung warms up the oil in his hands before he spreads it on the scar. The tissue is rough and textured, and always icy cold. It is silver and if the moonlight hits it just right, it shimmers. Jungkook always hated the way it looked and felt, but Taehyung never made him feel bad for it. He kissed the scar and continued to like him just as much as before.
The oil and Taehyung’s touch relieve Jungkook’s pain instantly. He sighs deeply, closing his eyes.
“Thank you.”
“I am simply happy to help you.”
“I mean it, thank you for everything you do. I don’t say it enough, but I’m really grateful for all of your effort.”
Taehyung kisses Jungkook’s neck adoringly. He loves this man so much. He would do anything for him, so it feels silly that he thanks him for it.
“As I said, I am simply happy to help you.”
“You do, in a lot of ways.”
“That is good. And about the piercing idea, I am sorry if I dismissed it too quickly.”
“It’s okay. If you don’t wanna do it, you don’t wanna do it.”
“Perhaps we can come up with a compromise.”
“What are you thinking?”
“Well, you seem excited by it, so why don’t we pick out a piercing we both like and then you can pierce whatever part of your body you want and I will pierce my ear?”
“You’d be comfortable piercing your ear again?”
“I would. A second piercing will look nice, especially when it matches with you.”
“I think so too”, Jungkook confesses, snickering sheepishly.
“Then let us do that. We will pick a piercing which works for us both and then we can go from there.”
Jungkook thinks for a second, or perhaps Taehyung’s massage is simply way too relaxing and he forgets to talk.
“Chéri? What do you think?”
“Huh? Oh sorry. I zoned out because you relax me so much.” Jungkook turns around to steal a quick apology kiss. “I really like this idea.”
“Perfect. Then we can plan accordingly. Shall we go tomorrow?”
“Yes. I want it in my ear too and then get a lip piercing as a bonus.”
“Sounds like a great plan. You will fit a lip piercing so well.”
“Thanks. Do you think that we can make it quick? I want to spend the afternoon relaxing at home.”
“No way. I will take you out for lunch. Otherwise you will never leave the house.”
Jungkook huffs air in defeat. Taehyung is right.
“Fine, I can accept lunch.”
Taehyung chuckles fondly and kisses his scar.
“I am done. How are you feeling?”
Jungkook rolls his shoulder.
“It’s barely noticeable. Thank you.”
“Of course.”
Jungkook lies down, back facing Taehyung again. The latter is confused and slightly hurt by it until Jungkook looks over his shoulder.
“Why are you not spooning me?”
“Oh? I see. Somebody wants to be the little spoon. It is rather sly to ask for it so boldly”, Taehyung is joking, because they often bicker about who gets to be the little spoon.
“I won fair and square.”
“I beg to differ.”
Taehyung snuggles into Jungkook, taking him into his arms. His naked chest presses against Jungkook’s naked back. The connection is so intimate and nice.
“Mhm beg all you want”, Jungkook mumbles, pulling Taehyung’s arms tighter around him. “I’m right where I wanna be.”
“I can be the little spoon next time, it is only fair.”
“We’ll see about that.”
Taehyung chuckles, giving Jungkook a little squeeze which makes him giggle and snuggle closer. He loves teasing him, it makes him bratty heart so happy.
Summary: you have been trying to get pregnant for quite some time now, and maybe just maybe, Dr. Jeon can help you with that.
Genre: Pure Smut! (Last time I wrote smut, I realized exactly how long it had been, and I kind of took it as a challenge to write smut at least once a month. The thing is, sometimes you just do not get a proper plot, and hence, tadaaaaa, pwp it is!!
Word Count: 2K (approx)
Warnings: well it is smut right from the third line? fing**ing, spit**ng, ni**le pl**, p***y sl**p, loads of dirty talk, unpro****d s**, cre***e, takf of pregnancy, br***ing kink, that sounds about it, i think? (p.s: i hate writing them with all the "******" as well, but well, i am scared of tumblr flagging my post.
A/N: there is no mention of whether the reader is married or whether if she is in a relationship, I will leave that up to you. mentioning this because there is no infidelity.
patreon
When you had walked inside the fertilisation clinic, the only thing that you could feel was nerves.
You did not know if this attempt too would turn out to be a failure? What if they say something like, oh this is your last chance of getting pregnant? What if they again give you numbers and stats about your chance of pregnancy and you feel stressed? And that stress reduces your chance of a successful implantation?
There were questions and….questions. No answers at all.
However, now with your legs wide open as Dr. Jeon—Jungkook—slwooly inserts a finger inside you, all of your nerves are far gone. Instead, there is excitement of an entirely different kind.
“Does that feel alright?” He asks, with a deep concentrated frown. His fingers go deep inside you, exploring every inch.
“Ah—Yes, it does. It feels more than just alright,” you try to keep your voice low, not trying to embarrass yourself with how this exactly feels.
“Hmm,” your doctor hums, “What if I do this?”
Suddenly, the curious prodding of his fingers turn into slow paced movements of going in and out of your hole.
You gasp at the sensation and your toes curl in pleasure. Your cheeks feel way too warm and it is only made worse when you realise the slow wet sounds that are caused by the movement of his fingers. Fuck, you are wet.
“That feels very different,” you manage to speak out, trying to keep your breaths even.
“Different? That won’t do,” he raises a brow and increases his pace just enough for you to lose your mind.
“Fuck, that feels good,” you gasp loudly, unable to hold it in any longer.
“Now, that is what I was looking for,” Jungkook nods to himself before focusing on his movements even more. “What if I curl my finger slightly, like this?”
“Doc–Doctor, that feels way too good. Please don’t stop.” You cannot pretend to be unaffected anymore. But can you really be blamed?
With the way he has you sprawled out on the examination table, with your patient gown all the way up to your hips and your legs placed on top of the stirrups, you doubt there is really anything left for you to hide. Added to that with the way his curled fingers hit your spots, you are nothing but putty in his hands.
“Oh I won't stop Ms. Y/L/N, I will make sure that you walk out of this clinic pregnant and full of my seed,” he reassures you with a smug smirk on his lips.
“Please make me pregnant doctor,” you whimper.
“Oh, I will,” he spits on your pussy, watching it drip to meet his fingers, with sinful eyes, “I just need you to cooperate with me.”
“I will doctor,” you nod, angling your chin down to look at him where he sits between your legs, “Do whatever you need to.”
Jungkook hums. “The first step is that I need you to cum around my fingers. I need to see just how tightly you clench around them.”
“Yes—yes, right there,” you cry out, “I will cum for you. Just please don't stop.”
“The last thing I will do is to stop,” he grunts and then starts a pace that has you literally screaming.
Both of your hands grip the flimsy cover and your back arches at the pleasure that pulses through your entire body.
“Please, yes, right there. Don't stop, please,” you cry out, your lungs running out of air with how intense everything feels.
“Cum for me, I need to feel that.”
You are far beyond the point where you can understand the words. All you can feel and think is about how good this feels and your need to orgasm.
Another few seconds later, you are cumming hard, around his fingers. Your whole body succumbs to the feeling and you keep crying ‘yes’ like a broken record.
Jungkook’s pace does not take mercy on your state, his fingers keep continuing their slaughter as your body shakes.
“Just like that,” he praises.
You mewl pathetically, as you ride your orgasm. Waves and waves of pleasure course through your body like a tsunami, and as you slowly come down from it you feel way too breathless to speak.
Jungkook slowly withdraws his fingers and staring right into your eyes, licks them clean off. “Hmm, you do have a sweet pussy. I bet it would be so much sweeter, pregnant.”
You whine, still unable to speak.
Jungkook, comes up to get rid of the patient gown that you have been wearing for so long. He gently glides it down your shoulders, leaving you entirely naked.
“Look at how your nipples are all perked up,” he cups your breasts in his hands and slowly starts to squeeze them. “I need ot suck on them and see for myself that everything is alright.”
His vile words do something to you, despite having cummed right now. You watch in anticipation as Jungkook, slowly—almost teasingly—lowers his mouth to your puckered nipples. Once they are in his mouth, you gasp softly at how good the warmth of his mouth feels.
Your hand finds his hair and as he sucks and starts playing with your breasts, you pull on his hair and moan.
Jungkook makes all sorts of sinful sounds while sucking on you. He moans and grunts with your nipples in his mouth, almost as if he is too lost enjoying them to care about anything else in the world. The low wet sound that greets your ears when he messily runs the tip of his tongue on them paired with the extra loud pop sound when he briefly detaches from your nipples, makes you feel like a burning desire for him to do whatever it is that he wants to, to your body.
You however, feel like your mind is going absolutely crazy, when he spits on them. Spreading the spit all over your chest with his hands, he fiddles with your buds with his thumbs. “Fuck, they are perfect.”
You whine, the pleasure, the desire, everything in you just wants more of him….all of him.
Jungkook looks straight into your eyes and lowers his mouth on you again. As he sucks on you, his hand snakes down between your legs, and he spreads your wetness all over. Inserting two fingers, he fingers you slowly.
You whimper and pull on his hair, “Dr. Jeon, fuck!”
Jungkook, however, is soon pulling away. Both from your pussy and your nipples. “Hmm, you are ready to get fucked.”
You didn’t think that the words would shoot a shiver down your spine, but they do. Almost instinctively, you spread your legs wider and the movement does not escape Jungkook’s eyes.
He smirks. “Can’t wait to get fucked, I see. Don’t worry I will fuck you real good.”
Saying that he is moving to stand between your legs. He doesn’t bother removing his clothes. Simply lowering his trousers, he frees his length and starts stroking himself.
The sight of him in his white doctor’s jacket, standing between your legs, while he jerks himself off, has your hole clenching around nothing.
Jungkook lets a spit slowly drool on your pussy and spreads it with the tip of his cock. To your relief, he doesn’t tease you much, before he is pushing his length inside you.
Your breath gets heavier with every inch that he pushes inside you. You have never felt so full.
By the time he bottoms out, you find yourself wondering what would happen when he starts fucking you. With how big he is, you simply don’t know how long you will last.
Jungkook slowly starts moving. Pulls himself out entirely before pushing himself all the way in. He repeats his movement a few times before he is fucking you at a steady pace.
You look at him all helpless, your hands squeezing your boobs to ground yourself. And as much as Jungkook likes seeing you like this, he thinks he would much rather prefer seeing your tits jiggle with each thrust of his cock.
“Remove your hands, let me see your tits,” he grunts, and the moments you remove your hands, his hand comes up to slap them. “I wish I could cum all over them.”
“Please,” you beg, the image painted by his words, so incredibly sinful that you just need it.
Jungkook only tsks. “The only place I am cumming is deep inside your pussy. Will leave you so filled with my cum, that you won’t have any other option but to get pregnant.”
His words feel like fuel to the fire. “Please, fill me with your cum. I want to walk out with your cum dripping.”
“Nuh, uh, you are not going to let any of it drip out, we need to keep it all in, don’t we?”
You nod frantically, his pace leaving your mind incapable of words.
“Tell me, will you keep all of my cum deep inside your pussy?”
“Fuck, yes, I will,” you whimper, tears of pleasure forming at the corner of your eyes.
“Yes, you will, baby,” Jungkook hums satisfied, his hands slowly moving down to rub your clit in tight circles. “You will keep coming back to me, baby. Will beg me to keep fucking this pussy and have it filled with cum at all times.”
“Yes, please, right there,” you scream, throwing your head back. You do not know how long you will be able to hold it in.
“I want to see when your tits are all swollen, fuck I want to suck on them like that,” Jungkook spits on your nipple and then immediately takes one in his mouth.
“Call me Jungkook!” He commands, slapping your clit a couple times as punishment before resuming to rub frantic circles. “Want you to scream my name, when you cum for me.”
“Jungkook! Fuck! I am cumming!” Scream, you do. Your whole body feels pleasure like it has never before. You shake and your legs try to close on reflex around his hips. You feel yourself clench around him tightly as you ride your high.
“Fuck, you have got such a good pussy, huh,” Jungkook praises, his eyes appearing even more dark with lust. “Fuck, I need to cum inside you.”
That is all the warning you get before he is thrusting into you again.
Your whole body feels sensitive and way too warm. Your pussy feels absolutely ruined. But you cannot help but feel desperate to be filled by him.
“Please give me your cum, I need to be filled by you.”
Your words rile Jungkook up further. “Yeah? Need that? Beg for my cum, baby.”
“Please, Jungkook, cum inside me. Make me pregnant.”
That does it for him. He cums inside you with a loud groan and with his head thrown back, exposing his veiny sweaty neck.
The moment you feel him spill inside you, you curse softly. Fuck, this feels way too good.
Jungkook stills inside you, draining himself entirely. It is only when he is limp, that he slowly pulls out.
He is all breathless and messy hair when he bends down just a little to get a view of the mess he has made between your legs. He inserts two of his long fingers, fucking the cum deep inside you.
“Hmm, this looks good,” he comments, before straightening himself and beginning to buckle his belt. “Your next appointment is next week.”
“Don’t be late.”
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1k words, half of it has nothing to do with the story, there other half is just explicit scene. i don't really have much time, i'm writing in between work because i have this itch. hope you guys enjoy my horny literature 😅
pairing: superstar jk x reader (f)
genre: smut
warnings/tags: fluff, smut 🔞 (minors dni)
Beading of sweat still lingers on his body, glistening and it makes him look like the perfect stature of an idol. When he strums the bass, everything in the arena stood still in time. Cries and screaming are heard as he entertains the crowd with his solo bass performance. He is always the perfect superstar. The sea of people in the arena are worshipping him. Everytime he wipes his sweaty forehead, he can hear moans and hollering, as if they’re possessed.
The sold out arena are filled with echoes of his name,
Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook
“Ah, what to do? I think we’re reaching the end,” Jungkook teased the crowd. He knows very well how to interact with his fans.
“I don’t wanna end the show, I’m gonna miss you guys,” continued the always flirty prince.
Thousands of people keep on cheering and they are still full of energy even when it was already reaching towards the end of the show. The adrenaline rush is still palpating, high and thrilling under the dark night sky. Jungkook basks in moments like this. All of his hard work is for this. To mark his name as the top global superstar.
“Give it up for my terrific bands, the guitarist, drummers, and my dancers!” Jungkook shouted. And the crowd erupted in scream. It is almost endless, their screams for him.
Tonight marked the end of his leg tour in the US. It was bittersweet for him. Performing in the whole stadium for one set is already an achievement, but he successfully sold out a one-hundred thousand capacity venue in fifteen minutes. It was insane. With the massive success, amazing venue, the brilliant production and team behind his back,he is always grateful. He adores his beloved fans, who views him as the reincarnations of all the greatest stars. In simple words, Jeon Jungkook is fucking grateful.
Nevertheless, he is extremely beholden for his one and only goddess. You.
“I want my fiancé, get her. Please” Jungkook heaves, breathing hard as his manager keeps on fanning his burning body.
The aftermath of the superstar Jungkook. Long tours are slowly taking a toll on his body. Since tonight is the last stop before his long awaited vacation, Jungkook gave his two-hundred percent more than usual. After bowing to his fans, after the thunderous fireworks color the sky, Jungkook was rushed backstage.
Usually he will ride his segway or hoverboard straight to you, who always waited for him in the VIP room. It is a must for him to prepare you the finest room in his every tour. It's like reaching an oasis for him.
“She’s in the room, Jungkook. Pull yourself together first, and we’ll go together.” His manager reasoned with Jungkook. Pulling Jungkook up to sit on a chair with one of the bodyguards. The metal chair was the one Jungkook used when the stylist altered his appearance. It was safe to say, it is uncomfortable but this would do.
“Man, just let me go. I’m fine,” Jungkook tried to brush his manager off, but his arms were failing him. They feel like jelly and he is so exhausted.
The manager just ignored his request and instantly put the Boost Oxygen against Jungkook's mouth, silently pushing Jungkook to breathe in the oxygen. It was for his endurance anyway. Jungkook can sometimes be so stubborn.
The backstage is chaotic as always. The end of a show means, stylist, dancers, bands and the stage technician going all over the place to finish their last job.
His manager’s job is to make sure Jungkook does not pass out. His publicist will nag his ear off if he lets ‘The global entertainer pass out after a concert,’ as a headline on tomorrow’s news. The ruthless publicist is very good at keeping Jungkook’s image ‘safe’.
Suddenly the mayhem stops. A group of big build men making a circle big enough around Jungkook. Still a bit loopy, Jungkook just thought it was standard procedure. Closing his eyes, he imagines running to your arms. Just a few minutes before he can see you. You must’ve been worried in the waiting room.
“Baby?”
At the sound, the worn-out man perked up. Jungkook’s eyes wide open as he searches for your voice. Seeing you walk through the guards is like seeing an angel descend to him.
“I thought something had happened to you since the show is already over, and you’re not around,” You smile as you squat down in front of him. Looking up at him, slumping on the chair, with wet hair and droopy eyes. Jungkook is stable now as he can hold the oxygen bottles on his own.
“Hey, pretty. Were you monitoring me?” Jungkook asked in between breaths
“As per usual,” Your thumb rubs his sweaty cheek. “Your parents called, and they asked about the concert,” you continued.
“Ah, I did want them to come,” He said before he pulled you to sit on his lap. “But hyung is having a baby and they wanna be there,” he pouted.
A bit jealous of his parents’ attention to his brother. His sister-in-law is due any day now and they cannot be here with Jungkook. It was fine for him because as long as you’re around, it’s enough. Maybe he was a bit jealous of his brother’s life. A baby on the way, a private and peaceful life with his sister-in-law. A picture perfect family for Jungkook. He craved that.
Jungkook stares at you with a longing. You understand him. Jungkook is impatient about creating a family. He’s a bit emotional and sometimes it’s because the dopamine from the exhilarating concert is dying down. But most of the time, he is just a clingy man after portraying a strong persona for hours.
“Are you excited?” You asked as you brush his hair, wet and tangled.
“Hum, of course,” he answered. Jungkook snuggles his head on your shoulder. He dropped the oxygen bottle before he hugs your body.
“I know they kept it a secret, but do you think the baby is a boy or a girl?”
“A girl,” he answered in a heartbeat. “Hyung always blabbering about his baby being a girl,”
A baby on the way means a new family member and his upcoming wedding. It is going to be a hectic year. Jungkook thought it would’ve been nice if his brother’s baby had a close cousin.
Cute babies playing in his family’s house. The one he bought for his parents. Somewhere secluded and very private. To think of cute two pairs of feet running on the yard especially during festivities or just on any family occasion.
Jungkook is imagining how the house is filled with kids laughing and giggling. His brother’s baby and his. How joyful it will be. When Jungkook takes a long holiday to play with his own kid, travelling with you and the kid. Oh, he wants kids, plural.
In between imagining his scruffy brother as a father, he too, is envisioning himself as one.
He wants to be a dad so bad.
“Jungkook?” You snapped him out of his thoughts. You were smiling at him and your soft touches never left his sticky face.
“I’m so tired,” he rested his cheek on your palm.
“Then let us go back to the hotel, hum,” you eyed his manager and publicists.
They nodded along and the publicist is calling for someone through the walkie talkie. In a minute, there’s a cabby ready for him and you.
"Oh no," Jungkook sighed.
"What's wrong?" You immediately stop and check on him. A sudden rush of fear wash over you. Is he in pain? Is he having trouble breathing?
"I'm good, baby." Jungkook looks at you adoringly with his stupid big eyes. He chuckles at your panic. "It's you that you should worry about, we barely rest every time we reached the hotel," Jungkook whispered.
author’s note: ah this is awkward, the rest of the story is just smut and i was flagged by tumblr. and it seems such a hassle to figure it out, so if you wanna read the full explicit version, pls head over to my ao3.
