in the mind and heart of Mike

mike. twenty-eight. michigan. Instagram: mikeak

[imaknucklehead]

Hey tumblr, It's been a while.

[imaknucklehead]

Life is so weird right now.

[imaknucklehead]

in the past seven months..

March 15th - I lost my job. A job I had been at since I was 19. I am now 28.

April 24th thru May 5th - I went on nearly a two week trip to Spain with my girlfriend and her parents. A trip that should have been a blast but.. but wasn't.

May 24th - I turned 28. One step closer to 30.

September 3rd - After almost six months of unemployment I started a new job with a company completely outside of my comfort zone, doing something I've never done before. I work with my old supervisor from my previous employer.

September 27th - I made the choice to lease a new vehicle. 2019 GMC Terrain. With my vehicle needing more costly repairs as time went on, I figured why not? I work close to home, the miles won't be too bad.

And here's where everything began to fall apart..

October 20th - My girlfriend of three and a half years, someone I've lived with for an extended period of time, decides she no longer thinks we're working and calls for the relationship to end. She asks me to leave.

October 24th - After a lengthy discussion, she stands by her decision for the relationship to end and tells me I need to move out. I hadn't even been to the house in four days.

My life is in a very strange, foreign place right now. I don't know where I am coming or where I am going. After some pretty big hurdles being championed, I feel like I've slammed right back into the ground that is reality.

I felt so fucking awful for months.. things finally take a turn for the better, and everything is seemingly ripped away right from beneath me. Life is a bastard. A beautiful, but often times sordid and cruel bastard.

[imaknucklehead]

Hey everyone. It's been a while.

[imaknucklehead]

I'm strongly convinced that I will, no matter the effort put forth, never be able to go to bed at a decent time. It's been this way since I was younger, probably middle school. I'd stay up and watch television in my room. Usually late night talk shows (Jay Leno was a favorite of mine) and reruns of shows like That 70's Show and Fraser. I don't know if it's my anxious mind, or just the inability to sleep but then manage to be productive the following day without it, I've run out of ideas.

[imaknucklehead]

Quite often I find myself thinking about things going on in my life and for a moment I think about posting these thoughts on tumblr, like I used to do. I don't know who even follows me anymore. There used to be so many people that I genuinely considered friends (at one point) that I had met through here., and now I don't even recognize this place or any of the people in it.

[imaknucklehead]

[imaknucklehead]

These are a few of my favorite photos that I managed to take when we were in Italy (Venice, Verona, ans Milan).

The architectural size and detail of the Duomo of Milan was absolutely incredible. It is enormous! It’s the largest church in Italy, and the fifth largest in the world. It took over six centuries to complete. I’ve never been in a building that was so heavily guarded but for good reason. I found it funny though that literally right behind the cathedral is a HUGE outdoor shopping mall.. anything to gain that tourism dollar.

We went and saw Casa di Giulietta where Juliet’s balcony is, which if you remember the story is where she calls for Romeo. The walls inside the entry way to the courtyard are completely filled by signatures and notes written from visitors.

Verona was filled with history. For it being such a large city much of the historically signifcant areas (like the Roman ruins) were preserved and well taken care of. Believe it or not, the coliseum in Verona was the inspiration for the very well known coliseum in Rome.

Hands down the best pasta I had in Italy (and I had A LOT of it) and honestly just in general came from Del Moro’s. It’s like a fast-food restaurant but everything is handmade and fresh. Everyone was walking around with containers from there, it was a real treat.

I found some of the tags and graffiti around Venice to be intriguing- there was an absolutely sickening amount of it. The ones throwing insults to tourists and Americans were probably the best.

The grand canal was so beautiful, even when it was dreary and rainy outside. And when we took the gondola around it at night, it was really beautiful.

I loved Italy, and to think I was actually dismissive of the idea of going at first. Wouldn’t have traded the experience for anything.

[imaknucklehead]

Some of my favorite pictures that I had taken while I was in Germany. A lot of the photos I had took were purely just views of the varying landscapes. I've never really been in the mountains before (we passed through parts of Austria and Switzerland that were utterly breathtaking) so that was huge for me, really just being in a completely different country thousands of miles away from what I know was the true breath of fresh air that I needed and have sought after. Majority of pictures here are from Schwangau, Germany where we saw Schloss Neuschwanstein and it's surrounding landscape, and also when I went to a football game (FC Bayern Munchen v. FC Augsburg) at Allianz Arena. I threw another one in from when we first arrived in Munchen, and one from when we visited Schloss Nymphenburg. I'll be posting more after this, I didn't realize I could only upload 10 at a time.. Disclaimer: one or two of the pictures included were taken when we were in Switzerland.

[imaknucklehead]

Beard will grow in correctly one day

[imaknucklehead]

After basically forgetting about tumblr for the past.. three years or so, I took a look at who I'm following and I was stunned to see how much certain people I used to talk to have changed within that span of time. I started using tumblr when I was nineteen. Many of the things I had interest in then have fallen to the wayside. I'm twenty-five now, and I'm doing what I can to find some kind of stability in my life.

[imaknucklehead]

Wow! Where in Europe? Hope you're having fun !

Why would someone feel the need to be anonymous in order to say this?

[imaknucklehead]

Within the span of one day, 24 hours I managed to step foot in five different countries- Italy, Switzerland, Liechtenstein, Austria, and Germany. Before this trip, the only other country I had been in besides the US was Canada. This has been such a life changing experience and opened my eyes to something I could see myself certainly doing more of.

[imaknucklehead]

Going to Europe in a week!

[imaknucklehead]

"I did want to be with this one. I really wanted to choose her. She was an exquisite woman, brilliant and funny and sexy and sensual. She could make my whole body laugh with her quick, dark wit and short-circuit my brain with her exotic beauty. Waking up every morning with her snuggled in my arms was my happy place. I loved her wildly."

[imaknucklehead]

I miss you posting regularly. you have a good heart.

Maybe one day soon I'll start posting again

[imaknucklehead]

There are some things that people do, no matter how long or extensively I have known them for, that I will never get used to or like about them. That really bothers me.