Just me.

A girl who needed a long time to understand, she can't do it on her own.

[teacup13-deactivated20200319]

you’re all I want to see

until I’m too old to see

anything at all, you

make someday seem

closer than any other

day, my heart is made

up of every time you’ve

ever smiled at me & though

you remind me there is still

good in the world sometimes,

if we’re together, we’re always

where we belong - there’s a

place where love is everything

& that place is between

you & I

[impossibledede]

i‘m over you

And the truth is i loved you more than you could ever imagine doing which is quite funny because i never wanted you to be my boyfriend it just happened and then i liked it.

Maybe not just you but more the feeling that i‘m loved and that i‘m not alone anymore. More this kind of togetherness i thought we had. But actually we never had it. and that‘s okay.

I think i‘m over that now.

Just every second day i‘m layin‘ down with tears in my eyes and just once a week i want to kill you.

Yeah it seems like you‘re gettin boring for me.

I think i just want to live my life on.

And that‘s what i‘m doing.

I reached my daily goal of getting a guy looking at me and think ‚woah, she‘s lookin great i wanna get to know her‘ today about three times.

And it feels soo good.

It feels so good to be wanted.

That‘s the feeling which you never gave to me.

Yeah. I don‘t want to blame you for anything i just want you to know that it is okay and i‘m over it.

I don‘t care about you anymore.

l. g.

[impossibledede]

head vs. heart

My head keeps telling me that if he left me he does not deserve me.

But everytime my heads says this my heart keeps saying that I could have been better. That if I had changed a thing he would still be with me.

But he isn‘t and I‘m sure that if I had changed myself maybe he would have been happy but I wouldn‘t.

And that‘s the important thing.

My own happiness.

But now I‘m not happy at all because I miss him a lot and to see him regularly is extremely hard for my heart. Because everytime I see him my head and my heart have an argument which makes me sad.

But maybe deep inside of me I‘m happy that he left because now I don‘t have to change me.

No one should change for someone who isn‘t worth it.

l.g.

[impossibledede]

truth

I’m not sure about your truth.

You’re telling me a kind of truth which I cannot see.

I know a different truth.

It looks different because you can’t see the world with my eyes.

With my eyes, I see the world in a darker shade.

‘Cause without talking to you and without you, loving me, it’s all dark.

With your eyes, everything is full of light and happiness. You don’t need me talking to you to be happy. And you don’t need me loving you because you have enough people loving you.

Please, I don’t want you to think about this,  because when you do, your happiness will disappear.

I couldn’t live with your sadness.

Please God, that’s the reason I don’t talk about this with the person. 'Cause I cannot live with it.

Please forgive me.

y.s. | n.r.