Itās only been a year.
Around this time last year I was having the time of my life. The kind of ātime of my lifeā wherein I didnāt care Ā¬ā I was drinking hard, going out every chance I got, getting home at an ungodly hour with greasy food inside of me. I was being 21.Ā
I thought I was doing the post breakup single life really well, considering that in the first few months I was exercising a lot, eating healthily, always had time for family and friends with just enough time to get myself active and moving. That didnāt last long. After my birthday trip, my eating habits went berserk, gym time becameā¦stay-at-home-to-cure-this-hangover time, the only time I had free I spent out with friends chugging beers and listening to really good music. Anyway, to cut it short, I developed a side of me that people didnāt recognise. I loved every part of it though. It felt like I was living the ānormalā life. I was able to go to small bars in the middle of Cubao, share cheap alcoholic drinks and deep drunken conversations about the āadultā life, the love for film, the craziness of our country and of love. Yes. I felt like I was connecting to the real world.
Months later and one weekend getaway later.. reality punched me in the face. A conversation at 11pm after an 8 hour drive back home from the beach awakened me to what I was really doing to myself and to the people around me. All the late night going out and getting sh*tfaced is part of growing up, yes, and what makes it still okay is that I was only 21 years old. But I couldnāt take it any longer. During those days I drowning myself in the thoughts of just giving up on how to handle everything, I was living by the buzz of the beers rather than facing my demons and challenges sober and with thought. My body wasnāt taking it anymore either. I had been to the hospital twice since developing my horrible drinking habits. I wanted out.
A year later and I find myself on a Saturday night, alone in bed with my Papito snoring on his bed. Life is totally different. My boyfriend is out of town for a while getting a shoot done for his surf school and Iām here making good use of my time by filling you all in on whatās been a very good year to me. I honestly donāt regret last year (maybe the amount of alcohol consumed, thatās about it). But what makes me happy tonight is the thought that sometimes it just takes a crazy experience to get your butt kicked so you can get moving and improving again. An experience you grow through rather than just go through.Ā
PS.I know I promised on Twitter that I was going to post about Europe but that can wait.
PPS. I stopped drinking earlier this year due to my acidity. Donāt get me wrong, I still go out every now and then the only difference is now I stick to one glass per night out. :) Sa lahat ng magsasabing KJ, kayo nalang uminom ng alak para sakin. Tnx.Ā
Me, sans the boyfriend. Hahaha it's good to finally have my sober self back again.
