In Another Era

I don't belong here

[inanotherera]

If i were famous, I'd use that shit for good

[inanotherera]

Stuck on the thought of you. And you're half way around the world. I have no way of reaching you, and I wont for another 2.5 months. 

I wont allow myself to move on. 

I'm senseless. 

[andrewbreitel]

[groundzerohs-blog]

[matthejew-blog]

[hologran]

RAVIOLI RAVIOLI GIVE ME THE FORMIOLI

[inanotherera]

I had a dream about you today. It was so in depth and out of my mind. It felt so real.  You were there. We were back.  You looked me in the eyes.  Expressed your gratitude.  I fell in love all over again.  I wish to relive this moment. I remember thinking to myself, you are it. No hesitation. I wanted to pour my emotion to you. Tell you how hard its been baring the cold long distance in between.

Slowly I started regaining my conscience and learned it was all just another vivid dream. Wishfully. . When I'm asleep, my soul is taken out of my body but my heart takes over. It practically wrenches out all the emotion and hopes one ever wished for. I long to hear your voice again. Look into your deep brown eyes. Abstain from contact. But get as close as you'll allow me to. My heart longs for this emotion. Please god. Let the distance between us bring back the mutual agreed feeling and even stronger. I wish only to see you again. And speak to you. Every day like we once did. One month went by. A little over two months to go.

[inanotherera]

Swaying and praying Until it stops abruptly Laying and facing The ceiling above me

Laying and praying It comes again Saying and saying Someone call an ambulance

Fading and praying I can't go out like this The last vision I see Are eyes that are his.

Laying and laying It got the best of me Even laying on the train He stalks me in my dream

[inanotherera]

Suffocation is

being in a small space

in a car

with three other people

attacking the race of the one you love

they dont know 

but as the torment disguised as jokes 

is passed around

the insides of my soul are screaming out

these stupid jokes aren't funny.

as you make the generalization of a whole group of people,

i cant helpbut think of you

and how different you are

and how its not fair

and how badly i wanna tell you

and how badly it hurts

and how awkward it is

and how i wish you were here to defend yourself

and your people

and anyone else who you feel obligated to stand for

because you're good at dealing with these types of people

racists

you have a way with words

you have a beautiful mind

your words.

they're prophetic.

your actions

are excentric 

how i miss

talking with you

that one day we stayed out for hours 

by the water

sitting at one table

about our lives

you took my art

and kept it

you sought right through 

you have amazing stories

you have amazing experiences

how badly i wish i could talk to you right now

but you're on the other side of the world

and i'm on the other side of the country

and i wont see you for another 2 and a half months at least

and i'm thinking 

i'm preparing myself

for the worst

 you dont feel the same way i do

its been a month since we talked

the last time i texted you i told you about jazz

and how i used to listen to it after a kid

you told me about miles davis

i listened to him today

and thought of you the whole time

you told me after listening to it i'd feel great

you were right

i wish i could tell you about my adventures

i need your advice

every religious lecture telling the muslim youth what to do and what not to do, you do!

you are ideal in my eyes

no color of skin or hasty generalization is going to change that

in my heart, deep inside i know you're gonna contact me before i see you in the fall.

there is no way i could completely enjoy myself if you dont remember me.

i want to read your writings. i pray to god that you dont forget what i told you

and that i meant every word

you're a smart person. you are a psych student. did you see right through me? i hope i didnt turn you away for any reason

i've never felt this way about anyone in my life. if you ask for my hand, you can take both. this is how sure i am. 

[inanotherera]

Sleep is such a blessing. you can just turn the world off and float off into your dream land. let your mind take over for hours. God knew what he was doing when He invented sleep. 

Goodnight.

[inanotherera]

He was waiting on the uptown D train. Across the station he saw her waiting for the downtown D train. She walked by with her worn out high tops dirty from the grimy streets of the city. Fascinated with how each step she took, her floor length skirt exposed what seemed like another side to her. The downtown Brooklyner he remembered her being. Now classified as a city girl with a certificate proving so; her life was in Manhattan. Has been since she started at NYU 6 years ago. Now she's 2 years moving up in her career as a professional art curator. He wondered if the converse wearing rebel from Brooklyn remembered the winter the met. Or the spring they got stuck inside the R train together. Or the summer they spent every waking second in the minds of each other from the innocent love that grew quick but fell even more rapid. Slowly she walked against the crowd on the platform. Where was she walking? Her peek a boo converse walked until they reached the point of destination to a man on the bass strumming freely as if his life depended on it. He wasn't expecting money. In fact he refused money. she watched and he was visibly amused. She was washed away immediately as he increased the tempo so fast that his fingers moved in a high speed motion that attracted the eyes and ears of the corporate commuters in amazement. She was equally amused and gave out a shy laugh after he winked at her... Only to turn her head to the other side of the platform where they finally locked eyes. They locked eyes with an expression as though a fire rekindled. She smiled with only a second for him to take it in. The oncoming train sped passed her  in arrival and departed only to see that she boarded the D train headed downtown to Brooklyn. The man with the guitar was alone once again.

[inanotherera]

Cramped up in a corner. Have i hit my rock bottom? I'm unhappy my creativity is Dried up like a raisin. I want to go back to my friends. Laughing every moment. The stress was tests and my meetings. I miss the smell of my house. The familiarity. This is hard. I have no friends here. Do I belong? Do I fit in? I guess its better I Do it now when I'm young rather than after I graduate when my life really does depend on it. Inshallah khair Inshallah khair. Ya Allah give me strength. I need strength that only you provide.

[inanotherera]

I can't help but not ignore the signs. The commonalities one has with another is average, however when it comes to the amount we had, I can't help but wonder. I can't help but question the divine plan of the divine planner. I'm wishing from the bottom of my soul, from the back of my mind, from the deepest of my subconscious, from the front of my brain, from the weariness of my heart.

[inanotherera]

they loved each other on the way home. They were each others fantasy. They never loved so hard: it was as if 21 years of love came pouring out desperately after being covert for so long. They loved each other so hard that it wasn't until now that they truly acknowledged a divinity because they knew this feeling was supernatural. This power and sensation they get just from the mere glimpse in the eye. They met on the subway.

[inanotherera]

You're half way across the world and I'm half way across the country. As I am taken underground in the train of my sure conscious, it is a constant prayer. It is a constant conversation with God asking, wishing, wishfully thinking, willfully thinking, is this supposed to happen

[inanotherera]

Every time I think about it mind goes on a whirlwind. I can't help but mope. I can't help but get the feeling it won't happen. I can't help but know there is a possibility that things won't work out. I never prayed so hard. I never was so sure of anything.

[inanotherera]

You will never know who I am.