Pop: One man's trash is another man's treasure.
Cub: What?
Pop: I'm putting you up for adoption.

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@incorrect-htf-quotes
Pop: One man's trash is another man's treasure.
Cub: What?
Pop: I'm putting you up for adoption.
Lifty: If we go on a date, DON'T BRING YOUR PURSE! I'm not gonna let you pay. Just run when I run.
Mouse-Kaboom: Sneaky, how's Flippy?
Sneaky: Bad news... He's still alive.
Petunia: (about Lumpy) So anyway after the investigation came up dry he just gathered all the evidence, dumped it on my porch, and left without a word! The gall! I guess it’s true what they say, ACAM.
Giggles: All Cops Are... Monsters?
Petunia: All Cops Are Messy.
Flaky: I don’t want you to fight in the war.
Flippy: Because you’re afraid of losing me?
Flaky: No, because you suck at fighting.
Disco Bear: Next time, remember my entrance.
Cuddles: I will... Your Highness.
Disco Bear: Thank you.
(later)
Disco Bear: (sitting on the couch with a drink) Wait, was he making fun of me?
Calling an Exorcist
The Mole: I'm here to remove the demon that has possessed you.
Lammy: ? I didn't call you.
Mr. Pickels: I did.
(at the hospital)
Cub: When I grow up, I wanna be a doctor just like you!
Lumpy: (smiles) Aww... You're not gonna grow up.
Fliqpy: >:D Are you ready to DIE? (holds up knife)
Flaky: No.
Fliqpy: >:D Then I'll come back later.
Toothy: Hey, I bet I can make you say five.
Shifty: Alright, bet.
Toothy: Uh, how old were you when your dad left?
Shifty: ... :|
Lifty: (laughs) Your dad left when you were five!
Shifty: Shut up, we have the same dad!
Lifty: ... :(
Disco Bear: I can't understand why you don't like me. I have nice hair, a very pleasant smile, a cheerful personality, a kind face, and a heart full of love.
Disco Bear: If you add up all my features, I think you'd get a pretty attractive answer.
Petunia: (pauses) Maybe you added wrong.
Lifty: I just got arrested for being too ugly. Can someone come bail me out?
Shifty: On my way!
(later)
Shifty: Can someone come bail me out?
Cuddles: How’d you break your leg?
Toothy: I just tripped down a staircase.
Petunia: He misgendered Flaky and I got pissed.
Therapy
Lumpy: So what's troubling you?
Petunia: My parents taught me to be so polite that now I have trouble taking up any emotional real estate.
Lumpy: And how does that make you feel?
Petunia: Fine.
Flaky: Sorry if I'm bothering you.
Surgeon!Giggles: How do you keep waking up and saying that?
Lumpy: Listen, I met your ex, and you dodged a bullet.
Pop: You know we were married for 10 years.
Lumpy: You dislodged a bullet.
Dr. Lumpy: At first I thought the cause of death was kidney failure, brought about by untreated diabetes, but then I noticed (uncovers patient) the knife.