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@incorrectalwayssunnyquotes
Dennis: What the HELL was that for! Was that necessary you two!?
Mac: Well, nothing physically was stopping us from doing that. Only social constructs; we all know how weak those are; and cowardice. And I’m no coward.
Dennis: Tell that to the guy you threw a potted plant at.
Mac: What's so bad about being gay? Charlie: Nothing! It just seems kinda hard to be gay. Mac: Oh, it's really hard. I mean, have you ever looked at gay porn? Charlie: What? No. Mac: Neither have I, right? Okay. Now if you'll excuse me...
Idk what you mean... these quotes are all completely accurate!!!
.
Dennis: I go to a psychiatrist now, she hates my guts. She says I suffer from delusions of sexual superiority, she just wants to do me.
Mac to the the gang: Alright, listen up you little shits.
Mac: Not you, Dennis. You’re an angel and we are thrilled you’re here
mac: who ate my leftovers?
dee (offscreen): who ate my brother’s ass?
mac: ...kay
How about some thicc limes?
PEOPLE WILL CHOKE! PEOPLE WILL DIE!
mac: I know you think of me as a guy who punches and kicks, but I want you do know that I have a black belt...in listening.
mac: in the name of the father, son and Holy Ghost
dee: head, shoulders, knees and toes
dennis: turn up your nose, strike that pose
charlie: HEYY MACERENA
The gang goes to Costco part two
Frank: hey look at that chair!!
Dennis: ooh that's a nice one. Try it out.
Frank: oh yeah...
Dennis: you like it?
Frank: yeah.
Dennis: you wanna get it?
Frank: I don't know. Do you think they can bring over one of the tv's and some beer? I wanna get an accurate view of what it would be like.
Dennis: I don't think they can do that frank. C'mon we've got shopping to do and Dee is white knuckling the cart right now.
The gang goes to Costco part one
Mac: alright Charlie go get a cart.
Charlie: where?
Mac: over where people are walking away with carts.
Charlie: okay but there are people walking away from the exit with carts! Do you want me to go through the exit??
Mac: yes! Start running!!
Mac: no!! Charlie!! Over there!! Get the cart over there!!
Charlie: okay!! Okay!!
mac and another member of the gang: *physically beating each other up*
a customer: can i get a beer...can i please get a beer
mac: do you know her last name yet?
dennis: mac, im gonna tell you her last name tomorrow, cause she’s gonna be screaming it tonight
mac: she’s gonna be screaming her own last name?
dennis: charlie, how old do you think i am?
charlie: age doesn't matter, dennis. you could die at any time.
dennis: charlie. truth or dare
charlie: dare
dennis: ok. i dare you to kiss the prettiest girl in the room.
dennis: and notice i charitably said “girl” and not “person” because lets face it, i’d smoke all you bitches
dee: what’s upsetting you?
dennis: he’s always using common phrases wrong!
mac: cry me a table, dennis
mac: that's ridiculous, dennis doesn't have a crush on me
dee: yes he does
charlie: yes he does
frank: yes he does
dennis: yes i do