Incorrect Madam Spellman.

Everything is 100% canon ... at least in our minds

[addiemilfgomery]

it's season 5 of caos and hilda is exhausted. original post is from @pxmlx (https://www.tumblr.com/pxmlx/725033637437915136/fucking-idiots-i-mutter-to-myself-while-reading?source=share)

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: We've known each other for a long time, right? You've come to respect me?

Zelda:… Sure.

Lilith: Well, get ready to stop.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

[finding a dead body]

Sabrina: How long do you think he has been down there?

Ambrose: *takes some dust off the skeleton and licks it*

Ambrose: I'd say May of 1985.

Sabrina: You can tell by tasting it?

Ambrose: No, the date of the newspaper next to him.

Sabrina: Then why did you lick him?!?

Ambrose: How often do you get to taste a mummy?

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: Am I right, Zelda?

Zelda: I'm almost certain you're not, but to be fair, I wasn't listening.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: There's something about the sound of my own voice that fascinates me.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: I went through an entire character arc this week.

Lilith: I became more evil if you're curious.

Hilda: Don't worry, the week isn't over yet. There's still time for a redemption arc!

Lilith: Well now I'm just going to get worse on purpose.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Zelda: Are you trying to seduce me?

Lilith: Why? Are you seducible?

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Sabrina: I need your advice on something.

Zelda: Like you'll take it.

Sabrina: I take your advice!

Zelda: *raises eyebrow*

Sabrina: ...occasionally.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Mary: I'm a little scared of Hilda.

Sabrina: She wouldn't hurt a fly!

Mary: That's reassuring.

Zelda: She would kill a man, though.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Zelda: Are you ready to commit

Lilith: Like, a crime or to a relationship?

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: I never know what to say to people at funerals.

Zelda: Oh, just say "I'm sorry for your loss" then move on.

Lilith: Okay.

[Lilith and Zelda approach the widow]

Lilith:I'm sorry for your loss.

Lilith:

Lilith: Move on.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Zelda: Sometimes I forget my siblings actually have entire lives that they're living and they aren't just my side characters.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives

Zelda: I wake up at 4:30am

Lilith:

Lilith: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: if a beautiful woman disagrees with me I will immediately change my views.I have no principles.

Zelda: well maybe you should have principles

Lilith: You’re right I should

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Zelda: Yesterday I overheard Sabrina say to Lilith, "Are you sure this is a good idea?", and Lilith replied with “Trust me."

Zelda: I have never moved from one room to another so fast in my life.

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Sabrina: Hey Lilith , can we go with you to Hell?

Lilith: What did Zelda say?

Sabrina: She said no.

Lilith: So why are you asking me

Sabrina: Because she's not the boss of you.

Lilith, internally: it's a trap it's a trap it's a trap it's-

[incorrectmadamspellman]

Lilith: So I told Zelda to fight her demons, and that's the last thing I remember before getting knocked out.