it's season 5 of caos and hilda is exhausted. original post is from @pxmlx (https://www.tumblr.com/pxmlx/725033637437915136/fucking-idiots-i-mutter-to-myself-while-reading?source=share)
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it's season 5 of caos and hilda is exhausted. original post is from @pxmlx (https://www.tumblr.com/pxmlx/725033637437915136/fucking-idiots-i-mutter-to-myself-while-reading?source=share)
Lilith: We've known each other for a long time, right? You've come to respect me?
Zelda:… Sure.
Lilith: Well, get ready to stop.
[finding a dead body]
Sabrina: How long do you think he has been down there?
Ambrose: *takes some dust off the skeleton and licks it*
Ambrose: I'd say May of 1985.
Sabrina: You can tell by tasting it?
Ambrose: No, the date of the newspaper next to him.
Sabrina: Then why did you lick him?!?
Ambrose: How often do you get to taste a mummy?
Lilith: Am I right, Zelda?
Zelda: I'm almost certain you're not, but to be fair, I wasn't listening.
Lilith: There's something about the sound of my own voice that fascinates me.
Lilith: I went through an entire character arc this week.
Lilith: I became more evil if you're curious.
Hilda: Don't worry, the week isn't over yet. There's still time for a redemption arc!
Lilith: Well now I'm just going to get worse on purpose.
Zelda: Are you trying to seduce me?
Lilith: Why? Are you seducible?
Sabrina: I need your advice on something.
Zelda: Like you'll take it.
Sabrina: I take your advice!
Zelda: *raises eyebrow*
Sabrina: ...occasionally.
Mary: I'm a little scared of Hilda.
Sabrina: She wouldn't hurt a fly!
Mary: That's reassuring.
Zelda: She would kill a man, though.
Zelda: Are you ready to commit
Lilith: Like, a crime or to a relationship?
Lilith: I never know what to say to people at funerals.
Zelda: Oh, just say "I'm sorry for your loss" then move on.
Lilith: Okay.
[Lilith and Zelda approach the widow]
Lilith:I'm sorry for your loss.
Lilith:
Lilith: Move on.
Zelda: Sometimes I forget my siblings actually have entire lives that they're living and they aren't just my side characters.
Lilith: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives
Zelda: I wake up at 4:30am
Lilith:
Lilith: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives
Lilith: if a beautiful woman disagrees with me I will immediately change my views.I have no principles.
Zelda: well maybe you should have principles
Lilith: You’re right I should
Zelda: Yesterday I overheard Sabrina say to Lilith, "Are you sure this is a good idea?", and Lilith replied with “Trust me."
Zelda: I have never moved from one room to another so fast in my life.
Sabrina: Hey Lilith , can we go with you to Hell?
Lilith: What did Zelda say?
Sabrina: She said no.
Lilith: So why are you asking me
Sabrina: Because she's not the boss of you.
Lilith, internally: it's a trap it's a trap it's a trap it's-
Lilith: So I told Zelda to fight her demons, and that's the last thing I remember before getting knocked out.