One of those 'Incorrect Quotes' blogs but its mcyt

I've never made side blog before help me-

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Wilbur: Tommy, can I take you to my therapist? 'Cause he thinks I'm making you up.

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Techno: Schrödinger’s cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that’s both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.

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tommy: I learned some very valuable lessons from this.

ranboo: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away.

tommy: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God.

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ranboo: Can you keep a secret?

techno: Do you know anything about my life?

ranboo: No I do not. Good point.

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Tommy: I am not out of control! I'm a law abiding citizen!

Sam: Really? Name one law

Tommy: Don't kill people?

Sam: That's on me. I set the bar too low.

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Tubbo: WHY. why did you give Tommy a KNIFE?!

Philza: I’m sorry. He said he felt unsafe.

Tubbo: Now I feel unsafe!

Phil: I’m sorry.

Phil: ... would you like a knife?

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hello??

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niki: God, give me patience.

wilbur: I think you mean 'give me strength'.

niki: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

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Tubbo: I can’t believe you live nearby, and you won’t let anyone crash at your place.

Wilbur: You people already know too much about me.

Tommy: I know exactly three facts about you, and one of them is that you won’t let any of us crash at your place.

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Tubbo: Don't joke about murder. I was murdered once and it offends me.

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Ranboo: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

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Sam: What do you call disobeying the law?

Tommy: A hobby.

Sam: *crosses his arms*

Tommy: That i do not engage in.

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Wilbur: Yum, thanks!

Kidnapper: *puts more tape over his mouth* I said stop eating it.

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Techno: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

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Techno: The next time I open up to someone, it'll be my autopsy.

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Tommy (to wilbur): Did you just call me a shrimp, you asshole?! I'm still growing, dammit!

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Schlatt: When I see initials carved into a tree with a heart I think it’s so romantic. Two lovers on a date... one of them carrying a knife for some reason.