illusion .

[ineffcble]

    FELICITY WOULD CONSIDER herself a homebody. so, her allowing herself to be convinced by her friends to go out to a concert would be in a DREAM –– yet somehow it materialised. not just this, it was a mere MIRACLE that from said concert she actually brought someone back to her apartment. now, she did feel bad about the ruckus that felix might have heard last night, but she also wasn’t completely sure that he was home either. she couldn’t recall EVERYTHING that happened ( mostly for the sake of her not wanting to know what embarrassing things occurred outside of her comfort zone ), but nonetheless she inched out of her bed when the sun rose the next morning to make breakfast. is this what someone did in these type of situations ? she couldn’t be sure. when she heard some movement from the next room she didn’t have a second thought before blurting something out, “ oh, you’re awake  ? ”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               ’   i must be drunk because you’re actually listening to me … are you okay ? have you felt sick recently ? oh my god , are you dying ?   ’   she offers a breathy laugh , even though from experience she knows that her advice will be met with a false promise . she’s used to it , probably more than she should be , yet it seems to be in both of their natures to do what wasn’t the best for people around them .   ’   i don’t know . you’re the first person i told but noah could have told anyone .   ’   yet even she questions if he would go as far as to letting this information spread beyond his control . & telling anyone beyond their immediate circle would do just that . head shakes at the suspecting glance olivia passes in her direction , figuring that her denial from the moment prior almost fueled the exact confirmation the other woman had been looking for .   ‘   or maybe the source of their problems is that she’s boring … & he’s well  –  not ,   ’   the sentence trails off as an amused scoff passes through stained lips .   '   are you kidding ? he was at their house two days later picking up wes for soccer practice . i don’t think he gives a fuck , liv .   '   she raises the glass to eye level , staring through the red liquid ,   ’   which i mean is kind of hot , but …   ’

     " I GUESS SOMETIMES i just like to surprise you ! and NOT with a stranger walking out of our door after they’ve raided our pantry, ” olivia brazenly smiled. “ oh –– TEA. you think he would expose himself like that ? but he’s such a ‘ GOOD BOY ‘. i mean, he has a BIBLE QUOTE in his bio. ” recently, olivia had felt like her life lacked the drama that she always thought it had. in fact, she always liked to think that she had enough content in her life to fuel a better show than the kardashians since it would be more GENUINE. “ oh, god. i truly forgot how BORING she was. do you remember the time she came crying into your room because she felt like a slut when he touched her boobs for the first time ? ” she wanted to laugh at the fond memory. “ you know, he’s more savage that i thought. you gotta give him mad props for this. and you know what ? you’re both VALID. ”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

             ’   at the time …   ’   she practically laughs at the sentiment , head rolling back as the reaction passes through her chest . she knows the exact game he is trying to play with her , all done to garner a response to further her embarrassment . she believes to know better now , but even she can be proven otherwise .   ’   maybe that’s because i’m good at holding my tongue .   ’   every part of her wants to move on , forget the feeling of degradation which loomed over her in the very moment he made her out to be a fool . but if only it had been so simple . with their social circles , forgiving & forgetting never seemed to be the option most commonly chosen .   ‘   fantastic . are we done here ? or are you going to give me another recommendation on how you live your life ?   ’   jaw clenches then , head shaking as a very menial attempt to maintain an already dwindling composure .   ’   you know what i think you can improve on ?   '   she starts , offering a laugh mirroring his from a moment prior ,   ’   for you to learn … how to leave me the fuck alone .   ’   her gaze stays fixated , lips curling into a faux - saccharine fueled smile ,   ’   LOVE .   ’

     EVEN THOUGH HER words attempted to cut julius’ façade, he still had a wide smile on his face, “ NOPE. i know you enjoyed it –– many parts of it. some of the memories are just etched in my mind AND i know they’re in yours too ... ” he trailed off at the end, but it was a devilish way of putting things. he always knew who had the upper hand in the relationship and the new goal that is set forth for him and his little entourage requires that he make MORE memories with her by whatever means possible. he held his hand to his chest as she spoke, “ okay, okay. i’ll say enough with the BANTER for now. ” he changed the expression on his face to one that looked more solemn –– an expression that maybe suggested that he HAD actually reflected on his intentions the first time things happened, “ just let me take you out for lunch or something ? i promise it’ll be worth your time ... ” she needed to let her guard down in order for everything to be accomplished.

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               she has never been able to perfect the art of masking emotions , every feeling of vexation , anger , uneasiness spread across features for those who even bothered to spare a glance to see . dahlia never considered it a flaw , no , but more so it made her ability to tell a realistic lie invariably thin . & normally she’d be more than happy to see him upon hearing his approach ( it’s hard to miss ) , ecstatic even , but considering her rather foul mood it wouldn’t seem to be the best for either of them .   ’   i’m not in a rush ,   ’   she counters , tone overcompensating for the very evident anxiety spread throughout her person . instead of attempting to feed him another lie , one that he will surely see through , she secedes . he knows her better than most , & she truly was not in the mood to be prodded about every detail in regards to her recent meeting with a certain someone she didn’t want to give attention to .   ’   i just had a meeting with a professor . didn’t go as well as i thought it would .   ’   not necessarily a lie , yet she still offers a soft smile in distraction .   ’   of course i’m happy to see you … it’s just a bad time .  –   nevermind . sorry … so , is that your way of inviting me to something or ?   ‘   

     DESPITE EVERYTHING, XAVIER still wouldn’t consider his many years of companionship with dahlia a waste. truly –– he thought  –– who KNEW what the future holds ? sure, he was HURT, but he continued to think perhaps he could live to forgive and forget. “ i know a RUSH when i see one and i’m not talking about those hell sorority recruitment videos that i can’t  seem to escape ... ” he joked without prying too much. “ but seriously, you’ve got to learn to stop and smell the roses ! ” he huffed frowned in disappointment for her, “ i’m guessing by that it doesn’t mean you want to elaborate ? ” with such a tight-knit friend group, xavier always thought that they knew everything about each other. “ MAYBE. i’ve just heard rumours, that’s all and i figured you could blow off some steam, ” he winked playfully.

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

              ’   i’m never cheap ,   ’   she huffs , a soft pout taking over her features . her already inebriated condition forces a hum as his hand meets blushed cheeks , almost desperate for any bouts of affection he would come to offer .   ’   & i don’t like sharing what’s mine .   ’   the statement offers a clear double - meaning , leaning into his touch slightly as a means of reassurance . she can’t explain it , the warmth within her chest that seemingly grows with every moment the two of them spend together . yet she chooses to attribute the fact to her drunken haze . it only takes her a second to shift her posture , leaning down to finish the line he had started . a breathy cough passes through lips as the bitter taste only grows , & without pause , she inhales another line  –  enough to keep her satiated for the time being . vera shifts again , gaze meeting his with a flicker of roguishness .   ’   let’s make tonight more fun …   ’   she begins , only trailing off . it’s her very nature to bend the rules to fit her own set of principles , press people just far enough to ensure the outcome of their so - called endeavors would match the expectations she has set for herself . the fact made her unpredictable – to most . she takes a step forward before speaking again , arms raising from her sides for hands to clasp around the back of his neck .   ’   hm ?   ’

     EZRA COULDN’T HELP the smile that automatically painted his face. although she didn’t explicitly confess her affections it was clear ; MESSAGE : received. even in such an instance –– one could argue one of their most UGLY instances –– he could still find beauty in his partner. he could read her every expression and knew what differentiated one glare from the other. he arched his eyebrow with intrigue, “ and WHO would i be if i said no ? ” ezra had to admit that he thought he had TRULY done it all before he met vee, only to quickly find himself proven wrong. as her hands moved, so did his in as a natural response, “ what idea do you have now ? ”  he breathed leaning down and leaving a light kiss on her cheek.

[yassmines]

if a man has even one brain cell. he will use that to manipulate u

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               she’s known him since they were children , growing up with the same set of morals & instructions towards obedience , power , pride , all with the common goal to mediate a potential threat & grow their already flowered egos . however , even after so many years , octavia has never seen him so willing to give . so willing to protect himself & his family that it draws an open - mouthed beam .   ’   i’ve never seen you like this ,   ’   she muses , every glance thrown in his direction offered with a flicker of cruel intention . it’s quite obvious how her demeanor shifts as his tone weakens , knowing full well that her blatant threats left him in a place of desperation . a part of her takes pleasure in the control she has over him , but another questions just how far she can press until julius is nothing less than malleable , every word spoken to please her whims .   ’   what are you willing to do ?   ’   barely a murmur , unsure if he even heard the question despite their close vicinity . tone is considerably softer to her previous words , yet still offering no room for him to gain the upper hand .   ‘   almost … i don’t know if almost is enough .   ’   palm squeezes atop his shoulder , gently , yet with more force than before .   ’   your family isn’t subtle ,   ’   her grip tightens again , an attempt to maintain a metaphorical hold of the situation .   ’   tell me then ,  –  i’m known to be giving .   ’

     PERHAPS IF HE had been in this exact situation a couple years ago, he would’ve reacted very differently. maybe it was the bombshell that he discovered about his dad that put family into a NEW perspective or just created a slight sore spot. despite the bump in the road, to the general public, his family showed a SOLID foundation that would continue to act as an unstoppable machine for their community. whether it was all an illusion or a misdirection could only be revealed as time passed, but for right now, they were the ALL-POWERFUL bang family. it wasn’t just this –– normally he wouldn’t be brought down to his knees so quickly. the sense of raw ATTRACTION that he felt towards octavia made him believe that perhaps giving a LITTLE more than usual would not be the WORST thing ever ... and in fact ... maybe he could BENEFIT from it. “ i have a feeling you already know, ” he barely manages to say, though from them being so close he was sure it was enough. “ people get what they DESERVE, ” although the answer was originally in the framework of the vindictive nature of his family, he had a DOUBLE meaning in this sense. as her grip tightens he sucks in air and leans forward to whisper in her ear, “ people say the same thing about me too. ”

[libvrtine-blog]

               slim fingers wrap around a glass cup with a weakened grip , gaze unmoving from the door of the restroom they’ve occupied . call it inane , but a part of her wishes to be caught . for someone to walk in on them with fingers covered in white powder , hundred - dollar bills littering the floor near an emptied crystal tube on a dirtied counter . the very thought of uncertainty excites her , & she may be able to attribute it to the already subtle drunkenness or her nature of over - defiance ,  -  the almost soft laugh passing through parted lips confirms that the answer is BOTH . head rolls back for a passing moment , finally shifting her gaze to meet his . features soften slightly as a single hand extends out in his direction ,   ’   are you done ?   ’   faux annoyance slips into her tone , setting the cup beside her in a manner of exaggeration .   ’   or do i have to remind you that bill that’s currently up your nose is mine ?   ’   vera shrugs then , an aggrandized sigh huffing within her chest .   ’   s'il te plaît bébé , i thought being greedy was my thing .   ’

[ineffcble]

     ONE WOULD THINK that with the crimes that ezra commits, he would want to shy away from the spotlight. however, such a train of thought could not be more INACCURATE ; he desired to be seen ( though he knew when was the right or wrong time ). in such a situation where he would consider himself to be most VULNERABLE, he was glad to be in the comfort of the one person he trusted : vera. finally satisfied with his intake, when their eyes meet he can’t help but feel even more euphoric on top of the side effects. the twinge of annoyance ( whether it was fake or not ) had his heart THUD if not just for the cadence of her voice. he widened his eyes and raised his eyebrows in feigned shock, “ didn’t think you came out tonight with the purpose of being cheap. ” his hand reached up to her face before using his thumb to brush just below her eye, “ oui, but haven’t you ever heard of the idiomatic phrase ‘ sharing is charing, ’ mon chéri ?”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               the feelings she held towards him years prior were never truly allowed to disappear , with a reminder of her foolishness plaguing the halls of their university every given hour . but it would take far more than a slight vexation for her to come to admission , as far as she was concerned .   ‘   oh , my apologies . what would you like me to do instead ? because i like to think my reactions are appropriate considering ,   ’   eyes roll , & the grasp against books only tightens with every passing moment . it irritated her just how easily he was able to maintain such a vice grip on her emotions ,  -  both then & now .   ’   so have i … i’m sorry to disappoint you .   ’   it takes every remaining ounce of will - power from walking away then , however the mere idea of giving him the slightest satisfaction , control , forced an obviously fabricated beam to form atop pained lips .   ’   you’ve always been fond of them , haven’t you ? from what i remember . –  am i supposed to assume you’re suddenly different ? a better person ?   '   dahlia pauses , taking a small step towards him . a part of her wishes to say more , truly break him down to everything she believes him to deserve . but rather she continues to test the waters , see the reaction her accusations seem to garner .   ’   am i ?   ’

     “ CONSIDERING, ” HE ECHOED after her, “ i’d like to say that i treated you quite well during our year ? i didn’t hear any complaints at the TIME. ” he wanted to be CONTROVERSIAL at the least & he most DEFINITELY wanted to see her fired up again. all because of his phrasing which doesn’t quite tell  the entire story. a normal person would probably feel bad for the humiliation he caused her and the moments that would forever be etched into the minds of their peers, however, he always liked to push the boundaries. his reputation could handle it, after all. he cocked his head, “ my motto is that we must have FUN in this lifetime, don’t you think ? ” he gave a faux pout, pursing his lips together, “ just let me know what to improve on and i’ll see what i can do for you, love. ” he breathes out with an airy laugh, “ now, what sort of question is that ? ”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               ’   no , i just have a feeling you’re not giving to anyone unless they really ask for it . almost , i guess , until they’re practically begging .   ‘   she offers a nonchalant shrug , faux innocence spread throughout her words . an involuntary scoff passes through lips at his moment of contemplation ,   ’   considering you’re here … asking me to dinner … with my sister , of course . seems like it stuck out .   ’   head tilts for a moment before pushing herself on top of the counter . she crosses her legs then , squeezing her thighs together with a soft smirk . her actions are intentional , purposely done just to watch the reaction to every taunt .   '   what’s wrong with confidence ?   ’   legs uncross , an exasperated sigh forming within her chest . patience had already been worn , & each & every moment of relentless teasing made her want nothing more than to give in . but he is quick to give her the slightest reminder of what restraint earns , & her patience settles .   ’   i guess , & how can i reject your friend when he’ll be the only person who can explain  –   ’   she trails off , gesturing towards a once bare shoulder . a devilish twinkle takes over her gaze , intentions becoming more than clear in that given moment . lips curl slightly , teeth biting into her bottom lip as she shrugs again , forcing the hair to reveal bruised skin .   ’   unless you want her to know i belong to you .   ’

     “ I HAVE TO know how much they want it. the desperation is sort of part of the FUN, ” he breathed with a devilish grin. though one wouldn’t normally lay out their cards in such a way, noah knew that there was at least one other characteristic of his that always drew other people to want MORE of him. “ or MAYBE i’m being a great boyfriend and thinking of my girlfriend who might want to spend more time with her sister ? ” he flashed a cheeky smile. he couldn’t help but notice what she was doing, although it would take a little more than a few simple GESTURES to get him going. how does she think he has controlled himself over the past few years ? but –– he would be a liar to deny the temptation. “ there’s really more where that came from, ” he began, as he was sure that he was aware. “ i guess he could explain it, but maybe you’re sister should just assume that you’re active, ” he says with a playful glint in his eyes. he ran his thumb over the newly bruised skin with hand cupping her neck. he leaned in until their lips were almost touching before stopping, “ don’t you think that’s a little greedy ? ” he quickly backed off and grabbed his keys. “ that’s enough stalling for today, don’t you think ? ”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               her insatiable need to be in control will be her very fault , painted lips ready to flaunt any phrase if it meant his undoing . enough so that her actions alone are provocative . hand rises from her side , placing itself atop his shoulder gently . only for a moment , before nails dig into the skin .   ’   you make this so easy ,   ’   she muses , no attempt being made to even feign offense , but rather she wants her indifference to his words to be noted . her grip loosens , but hand is unmoving.   ‘   maybe i should go to your parents & tell them everything about your sister … & everything you did to try to help her .   ’   her tone is nothing short of testing , a false threat displayed in the open purely for the purpose to be reactive .   ’   my moral high ground just can’t help it .   ’   a soft beam forms atop features , yet it’s menacing , wicked in the most corrupt ways , & the thought alone of having this much control over someone who prides himself on the epitome of excellence is enough to force reddened tint to cheeks .   ’   what do you think they’ll do to her ?  –  to you ? i heard they killed someone for defecting .   ’   head shakes then , tongue meeting the roof of her mouth with an unapproving click . a part of her enjoys this , their back & forth , because she hopes for an eventful end no matter the means necessary to reach it .  –  eyes roll , head shaking at what she deems to be an outrageous question .   ’   i’m sorry , but what about you rings normal ? baby , i had no idea you were into roleplaying .   ’     

     THOUGH HE ALWAYS enjoyed having the upper hand, he would admit that it was slightly REFRESHING to have someone else take the reins. he liked to be kept on his toes rather than sitting idly in his comfort zone ( there is truly no fun in that ). perhaps in just this ONE situation, it wasn’t just the EMOTIONAL games that were played that kept him guessing, but also the moves that she made. julius could never quite ANTICIPATE what octavia was going to do –– that sort of excited him. it was a combination of her threat and the feeling of her nails, but julius felt heat spread across his face and his mouth fall open, “ is there anything i can do to make sure you don’t EVER do that ? ” his words were weak, but THIS was his weak spot. you couldn’t expect anything else from him. “ i would maybe do ALMOST anything ... ” he trailed off in a whisper. though, to be fair, he had high standards for himself and his pride was one of the things that he never planned on relinquishing. “ you shouldn’t believe every RUMOUR you hear, ” he glared, his exterior hardening again. “ as for feeling normal ... WHO’S to say what i’m into ... ” 

[jesterfields]

🌈

[femaleidols]

LOOΠΔ’s Jinsoul for anonymous 💛

[memesandlaughs]

[ineffcble]

     XAVIER WAS ALWAYS known to be the optimistic one in the school. his life really hadn’t given him a reason to act OTHERWISE –– until that ‘MINOR’ bump in high school. he thought it was funny how a school year could change the way one saw another person and how an attitude was able to completely FLIP without other people knowing. either way, he still bounded down the historic hallways with a goofy smile on his face and a BOOMING voice that could command anyone’s attention. seeing a silhouette that he knew ALL too well after so many years, he lengthened his strides to catch up before slinging an arm around her shoulder, “ what’re you in a rush for ? can you believe another  year has escaped us ? ”  the questioned leaped off his tongue in an attempt to create his usual BUBBLY nature. “ got any big plans coming up ? also –– what’s the frown for ? shouldn’t you be HAPPY to see me after a little while ? ” he teased.

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               everything about him was so enticing , almost enough to forget even the darkest vices which involved the hurt & betrayal of his family . almost . because ultimately , nothing drives her more than the success of her own person , family or otherwise .   ‘   you haven’t given me a reason not to .   '   the rouge tint atop her cheeks only darkens then , knowing full well that she had no right to be enamored in the first place .   ’   hm , i’m not sure if your assurance is enough . perhaps a promise will suffice instead .   ’   a soft laugh bubbles within her chest , both at the her spoken words & his barely authoritative stance . she was told by her parents not to get too close , not to engage unless it was entirely out of necessity , but the very warnings seemed to be vanish with every soft gaze he graced her with . maybe there was a truth to their cautions , but perhaps the nature below the malevolent facade she wore so valiantly had once been nothing short of fond , caring , devoted .   '   do you always place your trust with people so easily ?   ’   the question passes through lips with genuine intention , head tilting with blatant curiosity .   ’   my apologies … that sounded quite rude .   ’   gaze shifts to her feet for a passing moment , looking up with a weak beam as insecurity seems to settle .   ’   yes - but you don’t have to stay with me . you must have other people to attend to .   ’

     HE COULDN’T HELP but express his joy with a pearly smile. it wasn’t although he didn’t already have some friends at the palace, it was just that he felt that there was some sort of special CONNECTION that he couldn’t quite put his finger on between the two of them. théodore hopes he isn’t just imagining things when he sees the rosy blush appear on her cheeks and he quickly looks at the ground, “ i’m glad you think that way. ” even if there was silence between them, théodore could’ve sworn that the bond between them was growing stronger. THIS was truly something that he would like to think is a new experience. “ would it be wrong of me to say yes ? i’m afraid if i say anything otherwise, i might be considered a LIAR, ” he looked with innocent eyes. as his brother once held all the responsibility, he had not yet been exposed to the HARSH reality of the situation that surrounded him. his family had been no help in exposing him either –– they figured that the sooner was in fact NOT the better in this situation. he shook his head, “ you don’t need to apologize –– it’s sort of nice to hear someone talk to me in a slightly different way... ” though at this moment in time, he didn’t think she could do any wrong, much less a misspoken sentence. “ i think that other people will always be there. whereas this energy ? well, who knows when something so ELECTRIC will be present next. we should definitely find snacks to fix your famished state. ”

[ineffcble]

libvrtine‌:

               the amount of resentment she held for him was virulent , so heavy within her chest that with the passing of every interaction , the vice grip only grew . it was her misplaced trust which fell for ill - intentions , but it had always been his actions which forced her to feel used , humiliated , by their peers for nothing more than a game where the prize was her faith .   ’   turns out you are good at reading situations ,   ’   tone cutting as she answers his question without a glaring response . it wasn’t like her to allow petty grievances to dictate her emotions , but something about how he carries himself , the prideful exterior with remorseless interior … became enough to push through her feigned civility . she knew that she would come to regret the words spoken in front of his mother , but in that moment she is nothing more than background .  –  jaw tenses when he speaks to her next , grip only tightening against the books in hand . perhaps she shouldn’t have accepted his impromptu invitation for a chat , but there truly is no point in dwelling in the mistake now .   ’   i really don’t , & i can promise you that that’s on purpose .  –  but humor me ; how have you been ?  find any other games to play ?   ’

     JULIUS NEVER FOUND any problems with his life during the time that they were together. though, he appreciated the added attention that it brought upon himself. ALSO, the fact that he would be on the winning side of a bet was enough to bring a smile onto his face ( one of the things he hated most was losing ). at the time he could’ve argued why dahlia was the perfect TARGET –– and he still can. he could hear the venom that oozed off of her words, but he knew her. such toxicity didn’t bother him in the least bit. julius is observant, but not for the better; he relaxed just as she tensed up finding a bit of JOY in the power he still had. “ that’s UNFORTUNATE, ” he frowned slightly. “ i feel like just our occasional passing looks in the hallways isn’t satisfying enough. why WOULDN’T you want to catch up ? ” he had an innocent look on his face though he already knew the answer. he wanted to hear it in HER words. “ i’ve been doing pretty well for myself ... ” he trailed off, “ games ? seems like an interesting word choice if you ask ME. ” a small smile crept onto his face.