you bring blue lights to dreams

ALEXA: you're really not being fair here, christian.

ALEXA: go to sleep. you'll regret this in the morning.

CHRISTIAN: i don't regret what i said. CHRISTIAN: might have been drunk, but i meant it. CHRISTIAN: looks like we're going to be roommates again, maybe we can get things right and finally talk like adults and i'll promise not to do anything to fuck it up this time. CHRISTIAN: i'm sober, alexa, and i don't want a life without you in it.

#[ text ]

CHRISTIAN: i just drank my weight in tequila and i cant stop thinkin bout you. why r u not talkin to me? CHRISTIAN: i miss you CHRISTIAN: i love you @alexasdemle

#[ text ]#😇

#[ visage ]

yeah? somehow i never feel it. all i do feel is like i'm constantly disappointing you. well, i was going to ask you out to dinner and tell you, but didn't exactly get the chance before you were jumping in bed with someone else. you know what? it doesn't even matter. clearly we don't work. you obviously don't see my point of view and i don't see yours either. yeah, i yelled at you for being my roommate! it freaked me out, we'd been fighting and you kept calling me a fruit loop then you turn around and say you've never called me crazy and it makes me feel like an idiot. not once have i ever said i'm a saint! that's you putting words in my mouth. i know my faults. i'm erratic and i'm messy, i don't communicate well and i get frustrated and push away when i feel like you're going to do it just so i can be the first one to do it. that's fine. i own up to it, but don't act like you're not part of the problem either. yeah, clearly you weren't thinking about me at all. not that i expected anything less. how the fuck are you going to stand there and say you wanted a week to connect when you immediately rushed to get your dick wet? it really doesn't matter anymore. hope you had the ride of your life, honestly. whatever. just mail my things back from your house. i don't want any reason to talk to you anymore.

That's your issue, that's not my doing, Alexa, because I've never once told you I was disappointed in you or even attempted to make you feel like I was disappointed in you. Bullshit, I didn't sleep with her that quickly, so you had time to offer this dinner because you wanted to talk things over. But no, you're right, it doesn't even matter anymore because we don't work. You never have seen my point of view, and I've tried to see yours, but you change the fucking goalposts all the damn time. You think I was thrilled at seeing you as my roommate at first? Because I wasn't, I knew we were going to fight all over again, and I apologize for calling you a fruit loop that time, but you were being one at the time in my defense. I've also never once said that I wasn't the problem when it comes to some things, because I know I am, but when I try to tell you how I feel, you act like I'm fucking lying and start fights with me or push me away. Or you act like I'm playing games. So when you push me away and I go fuck someone else, you jump down my throat even more. I can't fucking ever win with you, Alexa. Oh, I'm sorry, so the minute that you jumped in and started yelling at me, I was supposed to stay wanting to connect with you and try and move forward? Yeah, I had sex with someone else, and I was quick to do it too after you started in on your bullshit. I had an amazing time; it only would have been better had you not walked in and kind of ruined the moment. I apologize, that was just me being a dick, but sometimes you bring that side out of me more than most. But fine, I'll see that you get your shit, and I don't care about whatever you have of mine. You can throw it away or donate it, fuck it. But fine by me, because we don't talk anyway, you tell, and I am just supposed to sit there and listen.

dlannaagron

when it comes to getting tattooed, does everything with you have a meaning or do you get things just because you enjoy them? this older women approached me years ago and asked me why i had "mary had a little lamb" tattooed on my ribs. it's a humbling expierence when you realise you have to explain these things to people you know aren't going to entirely understand your vision. unfortunately, i wish i'd have thought some of mine through. i went through the painful process of having an extremely large alice in wonderland tattoo removed from my ribs (why do i always choose the ribs?) years back. let me warn you now, it's far from enjoyable. @infamouslyyu

For me it's a mixture of both. Some of my tattoos have deeper meanings behind them, and they're usually my favorite tattoos. But some of my tattoos are also tattoos that I decided to get on a whim as well. Usually when I've been up for a day or two and my mind is like let's get some new ink, and let's get this fucked-up design as well, you know? But it always makes me laugh when people ask and I explain some of my tattoos to them, and then they just look confused. Oh, believe me, there are a few I have that I wish I would have thought more about, but they're part of me now. But yeah, I heard removal is painful, and I'm not sure I'm at that point yet. But you had a large Alice in Wonderland tattoo on your ribs? That's kind of sick, babe.

#[ visage ]#[ instagram ]

DPRIAN: Late night sessions ~ 💥

look, i'm trying super hard not to sound like a bitch right now, but stop calling me! it's ridiculously humiliating that i actually tried to be enough for you. i stopped messing around with everyone and actually felt somewhat excited for a possibility that we could sort our shit out and actually become something real. evidently, i was wrong. you don't care about anything other that you're latest conquest. if your aim was to embarrass me, congratulations, you were successful in your little mission. are you happy now? is that what you wanted to hear from me? you win. now please just get out of my life. i don't have anything else left to give you. @infamousyu

#[ chit chat ]#nsfw tw #he isn't really done

I don't understand what you mean when you say you tried to be enough for me when I never once asked you to be anything but you for me. When did you stop messing around with everyone? And how was I supposed to know that when we didn't fucking communicate about it? You talk about wanting to sort our shit, but how was I even supposed to know we had anything to sort when the first thing you did was attack me for us being in a room together? That doesn't sound like someone that wanted something real with me, Alexa. All you did was want to fight me and then get mad at me when I slept with someone else and act like you were this fucking saint. Me sleeping with Kels had nothing to do with embarrassing you, you weren't supposed to come back to the room that early. You also weren't on my mind when I was fucking her, so don't think so highly of yourself. No, what I wanted for you was to grow the fuck up and talk to me like an adult and have a week of us connecting and maybe figuring our shit out. Instead, you were on the defensive right from the start, and now it's all my fault, like usual, because I didn't play your games. You want me out of your life? Fine. I'm done.

infamykelsea

Even though I know it was just a fun night together, you should have given me a heads up about Alexa. Because I've been feeling awful thinking about her upset and knowing that I was part of the reason for it. I reached out to her to check on her, so hopefully that wasn't a bad idea. ( @infamousyu )

There wasn't a real reason to give you a heads-up about her, since she and I aren't in a relationship. What we do have is complicated, and she insisted we see other people. So that's what I was doing that night with you—seeing other people. I didn't think she'd come back to the room that early, and that was my bad, but neither of us has anything we need to feel awful about. You probably shouldn't have reached out to her, she's not exactly the kindest person when she's been hurt or upset. But it was sweet of you to think of her like that when you really didn't need to.

#[ visage ]#flashing tw #body image tw

zhaozi

D P R I A N

seriously, what is wrong with you? i don't know how you did it, but i know this has to be your fault. what are the odds that they'd place us in the same room? did you bribe the staff or what? because there really is no other explanation... unless the universe is playing some cruel joke on me. you know i can't be in close proximity to you without wanting to rip your clothes off. this isn't fair. i'm supposed to be mad at that for being mad at me! that's really hard to do when you insist on changing in front of me. @infamousyu

What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you? I swear, you're such a fucking fruit loop most days. I didn't do anything, Alexa, it was the luck of the draw, it would seem like, so we might as well suck it up that we're roommates and just deal. I didn't bribe anyone. How do I know that you didn't bribe the staff? Maybe the universe is playing a cruel joke on you, and that should be a sign for you to stop being evil? I don't see how you not being able to be around me without wanting to get me naked is a me problem, because that sounds like a you problem, baby. Also, I change in front of you because it's not like you've not seen me naked before, so why do I need to be modest?

#[ event: cruise 2025 ]

because before this, it was always me and i felt like i had to chase you just to keep you interested. now you're putting in the effort and i appreciate you showing your interest, but it doesn't take away everything else. how am i giving you attitude by being honest? you're always bringing it up, as if you didn't agree to this too. if you didn't want this arrangement to become a thing, you could've said. you still could, but you won't because you're too proud. when have you ever told me how you feel? i mean actually tell me? you don't! you start to and then it's like you second guess yourself and steer the conversation in a completely different direction. it's giving me whiplash. just say what you want! the only reason i said we need to see other people is because nothing was changing between us. you didn't seem interested in commitment and i didn't want to be a bitch and try to change you. i can't read your mind, christian. you're acting like i suggested it to be cruel when i didn't! can you stop accusing me of shit i've never done? since when have i ever seen the worst in you? you think i'd spend all this time with you if i thought you were thar awful. at this point, i feel like you're just saying things to try and hurt me, to provoke a reaction and it isn't fair. you think i haven't tried to tell you how i feel too? you never seem interested. you turn away, or say you have work, or you kiss me and we end up back in bed. okay, she's one of the nicest people you've ever met. good for both of you. that still doesn't mean i have to like her. it doesn't matter if you're screwing her or not. where is the rulebook that states your friends have to be mine too?

I don't get why you would say that, because I don't feel like I've ever made it seem like you had to chase me to keep me interested. It's just how you say things, Alexa, and every time I say something that you don't agree with, you give me even more attitude. Even when I'm doing nothing but speaking to you calmly. Why wouldn't I agree to it? I'm not going to look foolish and say no to something when it was obviously something you'd been thinking about and something you wanted. If you didn't want to be with people besides me, Alexa, you'd have never brought it up in the first place. And remember, you're the one that brought it up, not me. And you're right, I'm not going to say anything, and it has nothing to do with pride and everything to do with the fact that you wanted something and I'm giving you what you wanted. I'm sorry if I second-guess myself, but when the person I have strong feelings for tells me they want to see other people, it's pretty easy to pull back from telling them how I fucking feel. So if I'm giving you whiplash, know it's a lot because of the shit you cause. It seems laughable to me that you say I don't seem interested in commitment when, before you suggested we see other people, I was fully committed to you. Like, was I going out with other people? Was I even paying attention to other people? No. I was fully focused on you. But because I wasn't doing things at your pace, or how you expected me to do them, then I'm not interested in commitment, and you needed to bring other people into the mix. I'm not asking you to read my mind, Alexa, I'm just asking for you to see what's right in front of you and stop assuming the damn worst. I feel like all you do is see the worst in me, because we'd not be doing this right now if you didn't see me in a better light, right? I'm not trying to hurt you, and if you're getting hurt by what I'm saying, then I'm sorry, but I'm just saying what's on my mind. I never seem interested? I would love to hear how you feel, Alexa, instead of fighting with you all the damn time. And we don't end in bed every time, I feel like that's an exaggeration. It's whatever about you and Madelyn, just don't act like you want to beat her up whenever she's around me. That's all I'm asking. Because I'll be spending time with her on the cruise, and since you and I are roommates, that means you'll likely see her.

madelynofinfamy

i'm doing pretty great, you're sweet to check on me! and i was happy when you came to hang out with me as well, we had a lot of fun, right? and don't worry about not being able to stay longer, i know you had a show that you needed to get to! i'm not sure when i can get away, but the minute i can come to la, I'll let you know! we'll have a lot of fun partying and hitting up clubs. and that's nice of you to keep alexa away from me, i'd rather not fight with her.

I'm always going to check on you, I just feel bad that we've not been able to link up in a while. I meant to come see you but have been busy with doing shows and working on some new music. I know you're pretty busy too since your show is ending. How is filming going? We'll have to meet up on the cruise and spend some time together, right? Maybe hit up a bar or two and have a good time. You're welcome, though I will say she's all bark and no bite, really. Plus, she's mostly mad at me and taking it out on anyone I hang out with, I feel like. So it's really got nothing to do with you, you know?

why would you assume that? i'm just tired of being the one that always has to reach out. if you want to talk to me, christian then maybe you should make the effort instead of expecting me to do it all the time. believe it or not, i'm actually fine with you seeing other people. your the one who constantly brings it up, so maybe it's you with the issue. no, okay, you don't get to twist this shit. you don't tell me how you feel! you come in all aggressive, starting an argument and then act like i'm irrational because i react. you want things to change between us then maybe tell me what you want. i can't read your fucking mind and i'm not about to make a fool out of myself when you ultimately reject me for being too crazy. i'm not making digs about anyone. you're the one out here acting like a child because i happen to not like the company you keep. how's that on me? i can't force myself to like people.

What do you mean that you're tired of being the one that always reaches out when I've been the one that has reached out the last few times? So, who is the one making the effort, only to be met with attitude every time he makes the effort? No, I don't have any issue, you see who you want to see, and I hope you're having the best time with them. I've told you how I've felt before, Alexa, and I feel like you've ignored me. Have you ever thought maybe that's why I come off all aggressive when I constantly feel like I'm ignored when I try to talk about what I'm feeling? Or you shut me down and tell me that we need to see other people. I feel like I've spelled out what I've wanted dozens of times, but you just don't want to pay attention because you always want to assume the worst when it comes to me. Plus, when have I ever rejected you for being "too crazy"? I just think it's insane that you don't like someone who is honestly one of the nicest people, that's all, and it makes me laugh because we're not even sleeping together, and you still act like you do toward her.

#[ visage ]#body image tw

catboyrome

📸 dprian: What you excited for ? 🤔❤️

#[ visage ]

DPR IAN on August 24th 2025

Just checking in to see how you're doing? I was glad to get to come to South Carolina to hang out with you a little bit, but sorry I couldn't stay a little while longer. Are you going to be free again anytime soon, and can you come to LA? We'll party it up and hit some clubs! And I promise, I'll keep Alexa away from you since she has such a big problem with us hanging out. [ @madelynofinfamy ]