Untitled @insanityonfeathers - Tumblr Blog

I was there; nobody saw me. I didn't see myself. I look in the mirror, it's empty. Why is it empty?

{Feel free to complete this; i am out of ideas}

( ; v ; )

I take a deep breath and try to understand what has gone wrong, and the search is impossible to complete for everything in my life has gone wrong. I've constantly wished to disappear, pushing people away the moment they tread upon my nonsensically wide boundaries. They do say one does not die as long as someone thinks about them. They do say ideas don't die, but I'm not an idea. I'm a mistake, forever forgotten only to exist as a spectre in this cruel world of ours.

Oh fuck nevermind, there's a tiny bite mark on my wrist, guess I'm just your everyday old vampire.

xiaaaooomeee

On a regular night, the I go out. I know what will happen, i have seen this before. I walk out the streets are lonely. The wind stops as i walk down the lane. This time i see no one. And perhaps no one yet again sees me.

{or do they?}

insanityonfeathers

I thought being a creature of the night would be different, would be exhilarating, sometimes thrilling. But no, the desperate search for prey to quench my hunger is disturbingly similar to my long past search for love and connection amidst a sea of loneliness. Who knew being a night owl would've been helpful like this tho. God i wonder if regular people that become vampires take time to adjust to their new sleep cycle, do sleeping pills work on me?

Completely unrelated but holy shit imagine hitting the gym at graveyard timings and you see a man struggling with chest press or leg machine and the moment he fucks up or hits muscle failure he turns into bats and drops the weights.

#now im going to spend my night thinking about a vampire who had a healthy sleep cycle #and then wonder about their workout regime if they used to hit the gym beforehand #do all vampires automatically have chiseled bodies or do they work out during the graveyard shifts of gyms

Kinda funky to come to terms with the fact that we're all information regurgitation machines that behave as if novelty is indeed a quality we possess when the ability to conceive a notion such as novelty is borrowed from collective understanding. Like wtf are conversations anyway, I've consumed information and you've consumed information and we'd like to toss our collections of information against one another hoping to find a semblance of correlation to feel understood when in reality our sense of understand is kinda borrowed from notions previously chartered and defined which we abide by. Or smth? Idk

#its 5 am and i have to sleep #wtf lmao #existentialism #existential dread #existential musings #someone send me another bottle of vodka and outrageous amounts of mountain dew

When it truly does come down to it, I don't feel like I'm connected to anyone at all. I'm an eternal voyager, forever on a journey seeking to land ashore, hoping to find retrieve, wishing for a blank silhouette to fill in and be.

Maybe I'll never find this sense of belonging, perhaps every second of existence is meant to be a quarrel against the universe for separating you from atoms that were rightfully yours, giving them vastly converging sentience yet being unable to see each other, irrelevant to one's life's lore,

Perhaps I've been unlucky, perhaps it always was meant to be a fight that's grimy and mucky, mayhaps I'll end up lucky, but it's improbable and full of holes.

I'm tired, I'm exhausted, the internet is devastatingly vast,

I'll try, perhaps cry, tho this repetition seems crass,

Good night, good bye, to the one I seek,

I'm drunk and i hope these words find the one they're destined to meet.

I'm rewatching hunterxhunter and can i just say, every time kurapika and leorio look at gon with those eyes of adoration, this warm goddamn feeling gushes all over me. I don't think I've ever awe'd so many times consecutively. And now I have to dump images of kurapika and gon looking adorable in that older brother who's taking of his curious little brother vibe like rn.

There's just something so pure about having characters that care about each other and it's noticeable in every other frame without emphasis being placed on it. Like kurapika and leorio wincing every time gon gets punched or even hanzo choosing to smile every time he encounters gon after their fight.

#hunter x hunter #gon freecss #kurapika #leorio #i thought id put this on tumblr instead of my gallery because idk man #anyways my apologies yet again

Why tf are y'all following me? Or is Tumblr tossing bots my way to incentivize me text dumping all over their confines again? Well jokes on you, I DO like the attention.

Also here's Wendy's being absolutely adorable and i thought I'd share it.

theplottery

Your writing is not sh*t. Here’s why.

Do you have a tendency to feel bad about your writing, or to look at other writers and think they’re so much better than you?

This is a very harmful mindset that you should make yourself aware of and do your best to overcome!

If you keep putting yourself down for lack of skill, you’re going to end up hurting your potential at improving, because you’ll be less likely to write at all.

And the only way to improve at writing is by being persistent with that skill.

So instead of thinking:

“I will never be as good as them.”

Reframe that opinion into:

“I can learn so much from them.”

Writing is a skill and the books you’re reading may be written by someone who’s further down the path of learning & growth than you are.

But that doesn’t make you a sh*t writer.

The only sh*t writers are those who believe they don’t need growth, and don’t choose to pursue it.

I get a lot of you in comments, DMs and ask boxes putting yourselves down because your writing doesn’t quite sound the way you want it to yet.

But you have to realise that being aware of this is the first step to becoming a good and confident writer, and the second step is to KEEP AT IT. Keep going even while you think you’re doing badly. There will come a point where you write a scene, a paragraph, or even a sentence that you’re well proud of, and every time you do — celebrate it! Because it means you’re growing, and your skill is developing, and that’s all any good writer needs — persistence and growth.

Did you hear my first book is coming out August 15th? You can pre-order it now through the [link here] or below!

thedankmemes

thepursuitofunderstanding

“We seldom realize, for example that our most private thoughts and emotions are not actually our own. For we think in terms of languages and images which we did not invent, but which were given to us by our society.”

— Alan Watts

Binge reading manga at midnight might not be the only way to tread past the downpour of the night, but it's the only way I think I can process right now.

#had some weed today and regret it tf #vulnerable #bored out of my mind #writing