.

[inthewakeof-m]

sometimes when i feel so isolated and alone like this my brain reminds me of all the god awful things i’ve done and how i’ve treated people in the past and even though i’ve already apologized to them and asked for forgiveness and they’ve given it to me i still feel so god damn guilty

i wish i didn’t but it follows me almost every day it sucks so much and i know the ways i behaved had the potential to create a lasting impact and i just i hate myself so much for it.

[inthewakeof-m]

i’m so tired of existing and i just want to stop being depressed and not deal with it. i’m so exhausted. i’m so tired. i’m tired of feeling alone. i keep trying to talk to people and i’m getting ignored. i just don’t want to be here. i don’t know if i should check myself in or what i’m just fucking tired

[inthewakeof-m]

like clockwork the depression slips in as a reminder of this is the time of year when my parents got divorced and i’m so sick of it but hey whatever fuck it

[inthewakeof-m]

i have a lot of emotions and don’t know what to do with them

[dilophosaurid]

about adhd

it concerns me that people really don’t know that adhd isn’t a personality type or behavioral problem.

adhd isn’t someone who’s personality is driven by fun and disorder.

adhd is someone who’s brain goes all over the place looking for dopamine, because it doesn’t make or register enough of it, and when it finds a source of dopamine, it hyperfixates on it. it’s about deregulation of attention as well as emotions.

it’s not a person who can’t behave. a person with adhd can look like a lot of things. misconceptions about what adhd looks like kept me from even looking for a diagnosis, and it also kept myself and others (professionals, even) from taking my suspicions seriously.

everyone’s encouraged to reblog, but if you don’t have adhd, keep your additions to the tags.

[lauramkaye]

Smart people can have ADHD. And a lot of the time, they compensate for the ADHD with intelligence- until they reach the point where they just can’t overcome it anymore, which is why a lot of gifted + ADHD people have good grades their whole lives and then “suddenly” crash and burn. For some it’s college, for some it’s grad school, for some it’s postgrad or professional exams like the bar. Whenever the things they have to do can no longer be brute-forced at the last minute.

ADHD is often lumped in with learning disabilities but it’s really a DOING disability. We know what we should do. Probably we know six ways to do it. The trouble is actually getting our brains to activate so we CAN do it. Sometimes it’s like you’re being controlled by aliens or something because you say “I need to do X” and you’re going to do it and you just. Don’t.

[inthewakeof-m]

i have been feeling so full of guilt and shame lately and i don’t know what to do with it. i hate who i was and i know the only thing i can do now is be better but lord does this guilt plague me.

[inthewakeof-m]

everything is weird and i am exhausted and so tired of being homeless and couch surfing and i just want stability rn tbh

[inthewakeof-m]

shit keeps hitting the fan and i’m trying my best

[inthewakeof-m]

i miss having some people in my life, even if they aren’t meant to be there.

[inthewakeof-m]

i don’t understand it at all

[inthewakeof-m]

i’m aware i’m hormonal but i want to fucking scream

[todd--chavez]

[todd--chavez]

[todd--chavez]

The first time I watched this I wasn’t really paying attention and thought he was talking about life in general, but this was after he was on the phone with Beatrice finding out that his dad Butterscotch just died which changes the tone for me a lot. 

[inthewakeof-m]

just want to know why my mental is crashing so hard lately. i’m so all over the place. i wish i wasn’t. i didn’t leave the house today til 45 minutes ago. why?

[inthewakeof-m]

i fucking miss the one being in this universe that was always by my side for 19 years. that being literally saved my life. i want her back so bad.

[inthewakeof-m]

i think about the ways i acted in the past towards people i cared about and i know it’s not a lot i had control over at the time but it’s not an excuse and i know it prolly left a lasting impact on them and i really feel bad about it almost every day. it’s a dead conversation but it just makes me sad that i’ve caused others pain. i don’t know what to do with it.